Hide Pregnancy

Updated on February 03, 2011
R.P. asks from Aurora, CO
19 answers

I am 27-28 wks prego, and work for a shipping/receiving company part time. I am definitely showing for my weight however I have been hiding it by wearing tons of clothing/overalls. I have been interested in more training with the company for full time & job advancement. I received a call yesterday from my employeer who told me to go ahead and sign up. However, here's the catch, I would have to do a physical/drug test w/the company's health provider. I am pretty sure the dr. will be all touchy feely in the stomach area & the secret may get out earlier than what I want. My plan was to work hard, best, and into the company full time then when push come to shove when my body starts to not take it anymore, I would take maternity leave/leave of absence where I would be safe from being fired. My question is if/when I have to take the physical how do I avoid the dr from detecting this pregnancy? Any ideas would help...thanks!

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So What Happened?

After everyone's advice, it was revealed to my employer & I had passed all of the tests and physical for the training. However, I applied for another opening within the company because being a part-time employee I did not qualify for a LOA, ML, or Light Duty. I began to have an unexpected illness as well & Personell decided it was best to relieve me of my current position (dr.'s order anyways) yet suggested I hang in there until our corporate office makes a decision about my future w/the company since I had already applied and passed the requirements for the full-time position. I thank you all for your advice support and appreciate all who kept it real w/what I needed to do and how to do it in the best way possible...THANK YOU!!!

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S.B.

answers from Redding on

Just tell the doctor. You won't be able to hide it. Ask the doctor if it's something he HAS to reveal before you've had the chance.
If you don't do the physical, they'll think you're hiding something more serious than a pregnancy.
They can't terminate you for being pregnant.

3 moms found this helpful
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K.D.

answers from Denver on

I think you've done well to hide it this far, but I don't think putting the baby's health at risk is worth a promotion. Promotions will come along later. I'd just be upfront and honest with them. They will appreciate it. Honesty and integrity are a big part of promotions, so don't risk the baby's health over a dishonest thing. GL!

2 moms found this helpful

More Answers

G.T.

answers from Modesto on

It is what it is. You are pregnant. I think being honest with your employer would show way more integrity than trying to pull the wool over his eyes. Lying to them is not the way to go if you want a future with the company.

10 moms found this helpful

A.F.

answers from Chicago on

To be upfront with your employer, you should have told them by now. You are putting them at risk with heavy lifting without any kind of note from your OB if that is part of your job duties. Go do the physical, be honest about the pregnancy, and what comes -- comes. You are 12-13 weeks away from your due date and could go into labor early due to the stress and strain of the job -- you owe it to your employer and your baby to come clean. At this stage "hiding" it from a doctor is going to be impossible unless all they require is blood pressure/pulse and pee drug test.

7 moms found this helpful
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S.W.

answers from Minneapolis on

I would tell the doctor and then tell your employer. They're going to have to make arrangements for when you are out on leave. The more notice the better for them. The aren't going to appreciate having to replace you on short notice, and that surprise won't help you get moved to full-time with them.

5 moms found this helpful
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D.P.

answers from Pittsburgh on

Sorry, but why, exactly, do you need to hide this pregnancy? I don't get it.

5 moms found this helpful
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J.C.

answers from Anchorage on

I would tell your employer now. It is not fair to them to have them make you full time just in time to leave them short handed, forcing other to cover the full time work load. I just do not think that is right.

4 moms found this helpful

L.M.

answers from Dover on

You are 28 weeks and your employer doesn't know? Are you sure you are not just fooling yourself?

It is one thing not to tell, it is another to decieve when taking a physical. You would be better off to let the doctor know up front and be done with it. Then, immediately notify your boss...legally they can not fire you for being pregnant.

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J.B.

answers from Atlanta on

OK -you're 28 weeks pregnant! You don't have much time here. You're going to start showing in a MAJOR way VERY soon! It won't be hidden with overalls! You know it's against the law for them to fire you for being pregnant, don't you? You're also going to be on maternity leave for at least 6 weeks in the not to distant future, so it's probably wise for any promotions to wait until after that. Most employers are also MUCH happier for an employee to let them know as soon as possible when they are pregnant, so they can plan for their maternity leave. Why wouldn't you be able to go to training as long as it's before you deliver or go out on leave? If this involves you doing heavy lifting, you better NOT. You can seriously mess yourself up lifting heavy objects while pregnant -particularly in the later stages. You can also make your water break. You need to tell them now. What if you have a complication and have to go on bed rest or go into premature labor? They really need to know and you need to quit hiding it. All it's going to do the longer you wait is make you appear immature and a bit strange.

3 moms found this helpful
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S.G.

answers from Dallas on

What are they looking for in the physical? I'm pretty sure Hippa still applies to any info not within the specific things the company is looking for, andyou consent to be released to your company. You have to do it either way, but I would be very frank with the Dr. when you go, tell them you are pregnant, but ask that the info not be divulged if not a specific item the company is looking for. If the Dr. says he would hav eto divulge, well, then you can choose to tell before the medical tests do, or wait and see if you are approached. If you choose to stay quiet and ARE approached keep it very short and sweet and respectfully tell your supervisor that your pregnancy is in no way work related. That will send the message in a nice way that you know they cannot discriminate.

2 moms found this helpful
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J.N.

answers from Salt Lake City on

I don't think you can hide it. But, unless it directly affects your ability to perform a job, your employer cannot use it as a basis to deny promotion or anything - it's against the law! I am only assuming that this is your concern.
I don't see that the doctor will have a need to put it in the medical report, unless it could affect your ability to do your job, so you may not need to worry.

I am also assuming you are seeing your OB regularly, that you're not avoiding all prenatal care :)

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L.R.

answers from Washington DC on

Being up front and honest would be better in the long run, rather than getting the training and then saying, I'm going to be out for X weeks/months. Trying to deceive a doctor will possibly make your employers think you are deceptive in other ways.

Are you afraid that they will fire you entirely? Or just that they will turn you down for the training and you'll still have a job but won't advance (for now) and wont' make full-time? It's not clear from your post. You say you would later "take maternity leave where I would be safe from being fired." Fired as a part-timer or as a full-timer, assuming you would be full time after the training?

I'd go to HR first and talk with them what your rights (if any) are. But most of all I'd tell the truth now and if you want to keep working and eventually be full time there, tell them that very clearly and tell them about your specific plans for child care, how long you would need off when the baby is born, etc. You do have those plans in place--don't you? I would think they'd be likelier to stick by you if you are crystal clear about your plans and intentions and make them feel you really do want to commit to them. They may deny you the training just now but say you can do it later, after maternity leave, for instance (and hold them to it!).

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L.B.

answers from Denver on

Guess what...the first tests they take will show you are PG....you can not hide your blood or urine. Be honest and do what is best for your baby...

1 mom found this helpful
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K.L.

answers from Washington DC on

I don't understand why you haven't told them already. Legally they can't fire you for being pregnant. Depending on what kind of position you are in now, you could be putting yourself and the baby at risk.

1 mom found this helpful
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M.S.

answers from San Francisco on

What you are doing is decieving. I as an employer wouldn't want to promote you because of you not disclosing the pregnancy. Its not like your only 11 o 12 weeks--- you are 27 to 28 weeks pregnant! It is against the law to fire because of pregnancy. But not because of deception! Best wishes and come clean with this info BEFORE the training and trying to get your promotion.

M

1 mom found this helpful
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J.M.

answers from Scranton on

I have a friend who did that. She had to do a lot of physical stuff at work w/ heavy lifting.she ended up giving birth at 28 weeks and her son has cerebal paulsey at the highest. He is 14 and like a newborn. My friend almost killed herself after he was born blaming herself. No one knows why this happened, but I know I would never want to take a chance like that. When I got prego with my 4 year old I was a personal care aid and had to do a lot of heavy lifting and my Dr told me no heavy lifting as that can cause miscarriage or premature birth. I told myemployer this andhemade sure I didn't have to lift.

1 mom found this helpful
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D.R.

answers from Salt Lake City on

I would be surprised if having a physical would be really that invasive and I am sure your job is very important, but trying to hide your pregnancy at 28 weeks seems kind of risky for the health of your baby. Good-luck.

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K.D.

answers from Provo on

While they can't fire you for being pregnant, you are part-time and unless you've worked a certain number of hours already in the last calendar year you won't be safe from being fired for maternity leave/leave of abscense. You need to talk to HR or read closely the disclosures posters (that are required by law to be posted where you can read them) to find out what your rights are. And you need to disclose your pregnancy to your employer NOW. Besides putting yourself and your baby at risk, employers don't want employees who are not honest with them. If you are fired at this point your employer can make a good case of it being your dishonesty -- they are on the line for workers comp claims if you get hurt. And, unfortunately, pregnancy makes you a greater risk for injuries where you are doing physical labor. Your employer could say that they would have switched your duties if you had disclosed your pregnancy.
It's possible that they may still let you advance and get more training -- even into full-time and other job advancement. By continuing to hide your pregnancy though, you are giving them a reason to not trust you and that will hurt you in the long run.
Good luck to you!

M.W.

answers from Fort Collins on

Although I'm sure your employer appreciates your hard work I'm sure they would not be selfish enough to put you and an unborn child at risk for injury. You really need not push yourself when your pregnant especially this far along. There is so many things that could harm your body and the baby for example you could go into premature labor or cause a detached placenta or stress on your baby. Not to mention injuring yourself. Please take everyones advice and tell your employer!! They also need advanced notice to plan for your leave. They should not deny you advancement in the company just for being prego!! Your a woman what more can they expect your number ONE job is to care for your baby and yourself.
Good Luck!!

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