Help with Severe ADHD Child!!

First, "I am getting to a point that I am not sure what to do any more" - If you haven't already done so, you may want to contact your pediatrician and advise him/her of your current feelings about the situation. They should be helping you & supporting you as well as your son.

You mention you have had him "tested by many". Do you recall whether or not he was evaluated by a Pediatric Occupational Therapist? I ask because ADD/ADHD are very often misdiagnosed sensory issues. Only an OT can properly evaluate. That OT should specialize in pediatric OT and in Sensory Processing Disorders.

At 2 1/2 yrs, my son was diagnosed w/ SPD. Because he was my first child, I thought many of his behaviors were typical for boys or typical for toddlers. Even though, I'd spend many nights crying, wondering why we had such difficulties accomplishing simple & routine tasks; why we were lacking joy & fun. I would jokingly refer to him as my manic-depressive baby. One minute we'd be laughing, playing, and having fun and in the next second (literally) he'd be angry, frustrated, screeching or crying and I just couldn't figure out what was setting him off. He would hit, bite, kick, spit, push, or throw things when he was having difficulties.

Having him evaluated and properly diagnosed & treated has been such a sanity saver. Seriously, in his first session, I cried because I had not seen him so relaxed in such a long time. Because I was dealing with it all day, every day I couldn't see how unhappy he had become, until he was able to relax w/ OT. And he loved it! No meds, just play (therapy, but play). It gave us immediate benefits which only improved over time. He's a much happier child and I'm much less stressed. Sure, we still have difficult times, but with knowledge comes power. I have a better understanding of what sets him off. I now know some ways to prevent those situations. And I'm more patient with him knowing he doesn't always experience the world as I do and have control of his neurological responses. As he gets older, he's starting to recognize when he's feeling out of sorts and sometimes makes the suggestions on how to correct himself. Mostly, we do our "homework" by offering him OT approved, sensory exercises daily to help regulate his nervous system.

Another excellent resource is the book, "Is this your child?". Many behavioral problems are caused by, or at least exacerbated by, undiagnosed allergies or food & environmental sensitivities. Through this process, I learned that my daughter's eczema always became worse if she consumed milk. I have since switched her to soy. I have also learned that my son is sensitive to citrus. Based on diaper rashes and extreme mood swings and hyperactivity, he cannot eat pineapples. He can have oranges but only small amounts once a month or so. Also, I switched him to organic milk. He started sleeping through the night most nights (at 3 1/2 yrs old, this is long overdue). He no longer screeches and his mood swings are quite so extreme. It's mind boggling how things we take for granted can have such a significant impact on our children.

Other things your pediatrician may suggest is a possible need to visit w/ a behaviorist or psychologist. Is there more going on than the ADHD?

Best of luck in your search,
P.

I'm not sure I have answers to your concerns, but if it might make you feel better, I can tell you we did and still are going through the same thing. Last fall was the worst. My son was beginning 1st grade (6.5) and we would have tantrums where he also would get out of control. Again, same thing at night when the effects of the meds would end. It was a very stressful time and I ended up taking meds myself for depression. So yes, as someone else said, it's important to let your pediatrician know how you are feeling. He won't judge you.

On a happier note, things are better since he turned 7. Age of reason ?? His medication has been ajusted. It's not perfect, but much easier.

we are thinking about trying neurofeedback. There is a good book on the subject (Getting rid of Ritalin). I don't want to get my hopes too high, but we are hoping for behavorial improvments.

Good luck!

My son has Sensory Processing Disorder (SPD) and through my research I have learned that many kids with ADHD overlap with SPD. Has your son been evaluated by an Occupational Therapist? Depending on your school OT program or through a private venue, they could determine if your son could improve with this kind of therapy. I would recommend visiting kidfoundation.org for more information on SPD. There are a number of OT treatment places in the Denver area that specialize in SPD issues. My son currently is undergoing treatment at STAR Center in Greenwood Village.

My son Was diagnosed with ADAH also when he was in the 3rd Grade, I followed the DR. and Shcools Orders. put him in meds, at first it worked like a charm, he was stable, focused, interested, helpful, happy, almost euphoric, a real change, but then it turned on him, he started fidgiting more, paranoia, anger bursts, irritable, restless, discontent, un-happy, social phobic, scared, suicidal, crying all the time, (this was over a period on couple of years) mean while, I would take him back into the doctor and they would say he needs a higher dose of meds, I went with it, I didnt know what I was doing, I trusted them. Eventually when My son was 9, weighed 50 lb. wouldnt look at people, wouldnt talk to people, cried all the time, had sever nightmares, He'd go to school and when recess came, he'd sit out side up against the wall with his hoodie covering his head and wait until it was over, he had no friends, we were a mess, and he still wasnt focused anymore, in the end, the doctor had him on 60mg of Stratera and 40mg of Addreall (sp) and was ready to put him on an anti depressant, when we were getting ready to go on a 4 day vacation, he ran out of meds, his doctor was out of the office to call more in, so we went camping with out his meds.
That weekend I got my son back, He ran around with all the other kids, happy, with just a swim suit on, his face exposed, he laughed, ran, played, and joked, he was hyper, but so what, I had my son back, I cried, I absolutely could not believe what I had put him through the last couple years, I tell my story to all his teachers now and tell them if they cant handle him being hyper, tough, He's not going into that living hell he was living in just so he's easier in the class room.
Now,I did not stop there, I had taken a love and logic training class when my son was 5, I started going to the book store and buying books on ADHD, and children with mis-behavior. Tons of Books on the subject. I made a decistion to apply Love and Logic into our lives (along with the tips from other books) only because it makes sence to me, I have been studying Love and Logic for years now and just got certified to teach it. L&L has saved our home, my sanity, my sones health and mental well being, and brought peace and order into our home. It has taken time, but I choose DRUG FREE KIDS. (thats my own prefrence but I do not judge anyone who finds meds that DO work for there kids, Yea for them, It just didnt work for my son) I am now focusing on the L&L CD called "Calming the Chaos" and "Winning the Homework Battle"
I suggest Love and Logic whether your child is on meds or not. I cant tell you how much he has turned around, How much I have turned around!, Its helped the both of us, Its not just him with the problem. I think ADHD is a Family Affair, We all need to learn how to deal and live with it. My son is now 12, he is to the point where he does his chores WithOut Reminers :) He is now learning money management, I teach him different things than I think Most kids are learning, but He is smart, he has self esteme, He actually functions very normal now, He still has his moments but I have a whole new set of tools on how to handle each situation. I love it. We are a very happy family. and very functional family.
I have responded to many moms about our situation and with many examples on how love and logic has helped us. I can talk forever on the subject, but check it out and see if it's something that might work for you, here is the site with funny parenting stories you can listen to right on your computer for Free! http://www.loveandlogic.com/audioclips.html
Good luck, I know how hard and heart breaking it can be. Just know, it can be very rewarding too.
PM me if you ever want to talk.

C.,

Sounds like you have your hands full! Have you given any thought to vitamin therapy? I am a firm believer that Ritalin and such drugs are not the answer. And the vitamins will help with overall health, not simply just the ADHD. I would love to share more with you and give you some recommendations, if you are interested, please e-mail me and let me know. Some recommendations that I have researched are: Avoid all refined sugar products, white flour products, sweets, caffeine, soda, food coloring, preservatives, etc. Investigate and eliminate any hidden allergies and sensitivites. Ensure high quality protein intake with each meal and snack. Consider a product available through Shaklee called 'Gentle Sleep Complex' or herbal products containing valerian to help calm or relax. Avoid all toxic exposures: replace household and laundry cleaning products and personal care products with safe, non-toxic products (I am a huge advocate for the Shaklee products). Consider air and water purification- these can have big effects. If you would like more information on Shaklee, please visit www.shaklee.net/startahealthylife and if you are interested in a vitamin regimine that can help your son, e-mail me and I can give you more information. (____@____.com)

Good luck!
H.

Hi,
You may think I am off here, but my friend was going through this and turns out her son (10) spent 6 WEEKS in the hospital because it was diabetes NOT his ADHD. My daughter is severely hypoglycemic and the behavior you are describing sounds like you may have to explore other issues as well. So may I suggest talking to his pedi about possible sugar problems? Limit his carbs, increase protein and fruit and veg, feed him every 2 hrs, it may make a difference. I promise it sounds like sugar and our Pedi said that most often the pancreas catches up with them by time they are 10 - hence when it doesn't it seems most kids "get" juvenile diabetes when they are 10. I think Dr.s are quick to give adhd drugs and you need to take a big breath and go full speed ahead trying something different, it's tiring but you can do it. Good luck.

My little brother had ADHD. He was on medication, but there were peiods before his next dose that he'd get out of control. My mom swears that giving him a soda with caffeine in it helped calm him down. I know it sounds like the opposite should be true, but she read something once that said that in kids with ADD or ADHD it affects them differently. It's a simple thing to try, at least. Hope it helps.

I undestand what you are going through. My son has ADHD, Oppositional Defiance disorder, and Sensory Intergration Disorder. I have learned that a strick schudule works the best. A clear plan/schudule written out ( do it with him) and let him know up front what the consquences are if he doesn't do it. Write it next to it so he can't claim he didn't know.(like if he is late 15 minutes to bed ..he either goes to bed 15 minutes earlier the next night or looses 15 minutes of TV ) If my son messed up he resented the schudule instead of me. Kids with ADHD are often fight for control. They are secure if they think it is their idea. Remember talk to him when he is happy and not in the emotion. It does get better...I promise!!!! And I am a single mother also. And I saw huge improvements when he started Sensory Intergration therapy with an Occupational Therapist back home. I need to find one here in Colorado Springs. Basically, in a nutshell..my son is overstimulated by his enviroment. He cannot ignore things that we do without thinking like the hum of the refrigerator, the lawnmower two doors down, the tV., the lights from window, etc, etc. So some kids withdraw and will often hide or isolate themselves and some react with hyperactivity like my son. Since I have learned some tricks of the trade he has improved and the scholl staff know how to handle him better as well.

Check out loveandlogic.com. This is not the answer to all your problems, but it may complement what you are already doing and help you be a little more successful. Classes are offered all over town. I know a great instructor. Let me know if you want to get in tough with her. Hang in there!