Help with My Toddlers Sleeping

Dear A.,
you didn't say what time he went to sleep at night.
if he's in be early, try to keep him awake a little longer
at night. Cut out afternoon naps. especially late in the afternoons,or don't let him sleep but about 30 minutes,
he may be a little cranky after he first wakes up but that will pass.
S. D.

My daughter just went (maybe still going?) through something similar. The doctor called it "sleep resistance" and said it was a normal two-year old thing. Lots of articles on-line about how to deal with it...basically sleep training. Be firm, loving and consistent and you'll get through this phase!

-K.

Supernanny has a good method which often works. First time he gets up, you take his hand very matter of factly and say only "Bedtime, darling." Put him to bed and leave room. 2nd time "Bedtime" firmly and put him to bed and leave. 3rd time, no talking or eye contact. BE FIRM! Continue as many times as it takes (can take an hour or two if necessary). The next day talk with him and tell him you are just too tired to do anything fun since he woke you up last night. Have a very boring day! If you actually get a full night's sleep, tell him that since you were able to sleep, you feel happy and rested and do something very FUN.

We had a similar problem. We told our daughter she could not come out of bed until the sun was up and the birds were awake. Then we put a sticker chart on her bedroom door and for every morning when she was still in bed when I went to check on her, she got a sticker (we also used this to help her stay in bed during naptime). After 28 stickers she got a new book (so 2 weeks if she was consistently staying in bed for morning and nap). Good luck, I know it is so hard to not get even more frustrated when you are sleep deprived!

Is he in a baby bed? If he is, then just let him sit up and play or talk to his stuffed animals during the night and then when he gets sleepy he will go back to sleep. You don't have to have a little party with him.... just let him be awake if that is his schedule and let him sooth himself back to sleep.

We had trouble w/our little guy & read the book Baby Wise. I know the author has a similar book for toddlers. I know, "Read a book?" I'm a teacher and who has time for another thing to read. But it worked magic & it was an easy read. You don't have to read every chapter, just what works for now & read the rest when you can.
-J.

What is your child's nap pattern during the day? Try to eliminate any naps you son takes during the day. This may be hard and depending on how many naps he takes, eliminate one each week and work your way up to no more naps. I found that each my 3 children really didn't need naps past 2 years old. When they took naps they stayed up way too late and were hard to wake up in the morning.

I have 2 sons, both are older now but they were completely different as babies. My oldest slept from 9 p.m. to 9 a.m. every night. My youngest wouldn't sleep hardly at all at night when I needed to sleep. It's not too late for sleep training. What I did with my youngest was cut out all naps during the day. I kept him up, all day long until about 8 p.m. or 9 p.m. then let him sleep. Its hard at first but once he got his sleep schedule I got mine and was able to sleep during the night. He was up by 6 or 7 a.m. but thats a lot better than 3 and 4 a.m. it took about a week to get him on a normal sleep schedule and I hope this helps you some.

i have a 3 yr old son and a 2 yr old daughter. both had the crazy sleeping habits you are describing at 2. my son wouldnt go to sleep unless i rocked him or sang him to sleep. and then would wake up screaming like he was hurt. he did this for the first few months of being two. and then one night we did our routine and i told him that mommy was going down to the kitchen for a few minutes and that he didnt have to go to sleep but he had to stay in bed. i gave him a favorite toy and we have been sleeping through the night with him since. i have done the same thing with my two yr old lil girl and it just seems to work. also if you dont already, a few minutes before bed try giving a snack. something healthy such as banana or maybe penutbutter toast. (of course brush teeth right after) but my son used to wake up because he was hungry and once he ate he was fine. so we started the almost bed time snack. you are going to have up and down nights but i def. dont think its to late for sleep training. you just have to be willing to try different techniques to see which one works best for you and your son.
A. h.

I don't think it is too late to sleep train. You might want to try and get the books BabyWise and Toddlerwise. It is best to sleep train when they are babies but I beleive they are still trainable at 2.
I will tell you that they will go through there times of waking up in the middle of the night for various reasons, but my three seemed to have gotten over it in about a week.
Consistency is the key to helping your children with anything.

I have three children myself so I understand what you're going through. My kids went through this but I noticed it happened during the week. I spoke to the daycare center and found they were napping over 2 hours during the day so cutting the nap time back & maintaining a regular bedtime resolved our problem! If all else fails, ask your pediatrician for some guidance. There may be a medical reason for your son's sleeping problems. Good Luck!

Hello there.

I know exactly what you are going through. My son is now 8, but went through a similar pattern as a toddler. Warm milk or herbal tea before bedtime helps. Try telling your son that unless the sun is awake, he should not be either. That worked for me.

Good luck to you

I have three children and two of them did very much what your little one is doing. Take heart it will get better. I know it is hard right now, but it will all calm down. What do you do when he wakes? Does he sleep with you? Is he eating a good dinner at night? It seemed mine always slept better when they cooperated more at dinner time. Some people would say I made the mistake of letting my kids sleep w/me, but they all did until they were about 4! I just couldnt help it.. I work and it was easier to put them in the bed w/me. Is he getting good naps, because my youngest is three and she went threw this really bad. She actually always slept better at night when she got a good nap. Her doctor told me that when she doesnt sleep during the day her body goes into overload and has a hard time really getting into a rest mode at night. I dont know if this makes sense but it proved true with her.
Be patient it will get better!

"On Becoming Baby Wise" is a great resource.

You can still train him to sleep if you decide that is best. Something that might work if you don't mind him playing in his room to tell him that he cannot leave his room until the sun is up. Just say it is sleeping time until the sun is shining. You may play in your bed until you see the sun then you can wake mommy/daddy up.

its never to late to get your children on a sleep pattern. start with the basics again. after you get home have your child help you with dinner play with him to wear him out. keep the sugars low of course especially an hour before bedtime. when he gets up put him back into his bed and tell him that it is bedtime, keep putting him back in his bed, it will not take that long for him to realize that its not time to get up. also if he is napping during the day dont let him sleep longer than 2 hours if he does wake him up. also put him on your schedule of getting up. if you get up at 6 get your coffee and shower than wake him up as well. this gives him a schedule of sleeping and napping. just be consistent with the times he goes to bed and keep his nap at a regular time. like up at 630, breakfast, let him take a nap around 1230-230 that way he can have lunch. that will vary per child on when he eats before nap or after depending on his cranky level closer to nap time. and have him in bed by 9 at the latest. hope this helps.T.

Is he sick alot? Does he snore? Does he jerk when he is asleep? Is he scared of anything? you may want to get a sleep study done, as he could have issues with his sleeping. If there is nothing wrong with him, then go ahead and try to sleep train, but befor you put you and him through that, make sure that there is nothing causing this.

I know this sounds routine, but sometimes it helps to review the normal methods. First, ensure you have an established routine you do at bedtime. The time needs to be consistent and the activity level the hour immediately before bed moderate to minimal. Do your best to get him down within 15-30 minutes of a "set" bedtime each and every night.

Second, do what you can to discourage the behavior. Talk about not getting out of bed before putting him to bed. We have a 2 1/2 year old boy who knows not to get out of bed until we come get him. Reward him for staying in bed until you come get him.

Third, change the environment. If he sleeps with no noise now, maybe try an air purifier or fan to give him noise. If he is used to having noise, try quieting the room a bit.

If all else fails, talk to the doc. They may be able to help you by looking at other "negative" sleep habits he may have.