Help Teaching My 4 Yr Old Preschool at Home.

Updated on February 15, 2008
T.G. asks from Blaine, WA
59 answers

I am not sure I will be able to afford preschool for my son before he starts kindergarden. He is 4 yrs old. But wont start school for 2 more years since his birthday is in December. I feel like he lacks in learning skills and may be a little behind in what he should know. I have tried teaching him the alphabet and that has been a challenge. What tips can anyone give me on teaching my son what he needs to know before he enters the public school system. I know its a little early to tell but I also feel he may suffer from ADD, by his reactions when I am trying to work with him. (I suffered as a child myself) I dont plan on medicating but I do need some ideas on how to teach around the problem so him and I dont end up frustrated with each other. Also what does he need to know before going to school? Thanks for your help! I am new here!

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So What Happened?

Well this is a difficult one to say what happened unless its about a year down the road. I have read some great replies and all are appreciated. I think I am on the right track by what some have said. He got a Vsmile for christmas and loves it! And he does preschool time disney online several times a week, he loves that also. He does know his name and what letter it starts with, but as for age we are still working on that. The reason I dont plan on medicating unless I absolutly have to is my husband really doesnt believe that ADD is a real thing. I know it is I suffered the meds helped me but I am no longer on them. So learning how to teach him will be learning how to organize and be more productive myself. I dont want to label him yet but I see the problems earlier than my mom did with me. I hope this goes well I am determined to teach him things so that it isnt a fight and so I am not pestering him with it. I want it to be fun for him I want him to enjoy learning. I know when he is school age the way most teachers teach I will have to go over many things at home in his learning style whatever that ends up being. Thanks for your help everyone!

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M.F.

answers from Richland on

I understand completely! My daughter has a hard time focusing. She is now 6 and is in kindergarten. She did not go to preschool, because of one income and low budget. Anyway... I went to WalMart and picked up these workbooks for preschoolers. I had to work slow with her and in short, since she could only focus for so long. Just work at there pace, and try not to get frustrated, if they are getting frustrated they are probably done focusing and wont learn at that time. Try to get the workbooks out at least once a day and work with him. Try to reward him every time he gets something right or has accomplished a goal, even if it's something simple like focusing for 2 minutes instead of 1 minute. The schools like the children to know how to write their name, but some aren't as strict as others. I would mainly work on the things in his workbooks and his focus. In my experience in doing this with my daughter, it has been in great benefit! She is now at the top of her Kindergarten class, yet still struggles with focusing, but the teacher is okay with that at her age. My daughter also does not take any medication for her ADD symptoms. I think it's better to always work on there behavior before anything else. Hope this helps!! Good luck!

P.S. I am 26 yrs old and am a stay at home mom. I have two kids, one girl and one boy. My daughter is 6 and my son is 2.

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K.P.

answers from Eugene on

Hello
As a elementary school teacher and mom of a 4 year old son who also has a Dec. birth day. The important things preschool teaches children is to play well with others and to learn the flow of the classroom ie; how to stand in line, how to share, how to wait while some one else is speaking.
Many kids develop the ability to recognize letters and numbers and different ages. 4 is still young. The main thing is to read aloud to him and try to find age appropriate games which integrate letters but does not force them into things.
It is hard to diagnosis ADD in such young children because most children have a hard time sitting and concentrating at this age. He might just not be ready to learn those letters. Try finding creative ways to introduce letters with out pushing it on him. Like the first letter in his name or pick a letter of the day. Stick it to the fridge . Then go on a scavenger hunt in the house to look for things that start with this letter. At first you probably will find all the objects, but later on he will remember and find the objects himself. This can be a fun game with out forcing him to do things he might not be ready for.

Anyways hope this is helpful
K.

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B.D.

answers from Portland on

http://www.literacycenter.net/lessonview_en.htm

This is how I've been teaching my 3 year old....it's a *HUGE* help. It does require an attentive parent, but wow, she knows her ABCs and is learning to spell. Definitely a site worth looking into.

Another great site is starfall.com

B.

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L.O.

answers from Seattle on

Hello T.,
I have lots of ideas for you. I am a special education teacher and I have two daughters.
One pretty easy idea is to buy or check out the video Leap Frog Letter Factory. It teaches the letters and their sounds. Another fun idea is to buy those foam letters to use in the bathtub. They are very inexpensive at Target. Then, while you are giving him a bath, have him pick up a letter and tell you what it is. You can move on to having him say the letter name and the sound. Then, eventually, he could start telling you a word or someone's name that begins with that letter.
We also have a wooden alphabet puzzle. Underneath each letter is a picture of an animal that begins with that letter. For example, T is on top of a picture of a tiger. So, I have my oldest daughter say, "T is for tiger" as she puts that piece in.
And, reading aloud with your children is one of the best things you can do! Let him pick 3 books to read before bed each night. My daughter loves this. We snuggle up on the couch with the blanket. But, even when she went through a period in which she didn't want to sit with me, I still read, and I would ask her questions while I read to see if she was still listening. And, even though she was bouncy all over the room, she was still listening!
How is he doing with counting? It's a great idea to start counting everything. Put some cheerios in front of him and count them out. Check out books with counting....10 Apples Up On Top, 10 Little Monkeys Jumping on the Bed, etc.
The other thing you might look into, is whether or not the district you are in offers free pre-school. Often times there is a waiting list. But, if your son does in fact have ADD, he may be accepted even without being on the waiting list.
Let me know if you would like more ideas.
Have fun!
L.

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R.M.

answers from Philadelphia on

We have a very similiar situation. My daughter is 4 as well and wont start kindergarten for 2 years because her birthday is in October. I also feel like she is lacking in some areas but mainly due to hyperness and lack of attention. Her father was ADHD as a child and we feel the same that we dont want to have to medicate her. I dont get out much either and sometimes i feel like that is part of the problem, as far as when we do go somewhere she gets too excitable. She was actually put out of the daycare she was in because of it. Its pretty severe and difficult to handle at times. But i have noticed that like when I do practice her abc's and counting it doesnt seem like its sinking in...but u would be surprised. Out of the blue she is starting to do her counting and letters, but of course at her own leisure. The thing I think I'm trying to say in a long winded way is to not give up just because you dont get immidiate reaction with him, sometimes they just like to do things in their own time, it does sink in with them, they do get it. I am still working with my daughter on potty training, there again mainly due to the attention problem...but i noticed when i kinda just slacked a bit and gave her a bit of room so to speak, she is doing alot better. Patience is what i'm trying to say I guess. But if u get any helpful tips, keep us posted, we havent gotten our daughter where she needs to be yet, and who knows maybe someone might have some other helpful hints .

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S.C.

answers from Portland on

T.,

You don't have to have a lot of money to give your children a GREAT start in life. I am now a stay at home mommy to Aaron (6 mo. old). Before I started my current calling I was a kindergarten and first grade teacher. Here are some suggestions I would give to my new parents:

-READ, READ, READ...everything, all the time!!!
-Make learning fun, messy and reachable (not too hard too fast). (ex..make cookies, dig for worms, plant flowers, examine the different types of cones from trees, build an invention from garbage)
-Make learning active, hands on and real life
(remember...we can learn colors from nature, numbers from street signs and letters from helping mommy make the grocery list.)

The library has free passes to all sorts of activities around town. You just check them out and then you can go for free. They also have TONS of books on activities to do with your child. Most for little to no cost. I live in West Linn, so I would be happy to let you borrow a few of my books if you would like some more ideas.

I hope this helps.

S.

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T.R.

answers from Richland on

Letting him watch Sesame Street might get him interested in the ABCs. I'm not sure on your feelings toward tv (as some people are very anti at this age), but my son will be 4 in April and has picked up a lot from that show. He also watches the Letter Factory DVD (by LeapFrog) & that has helped him learn his sounds. He's in preschool, but I do my fair share with him at home (I'm an elementary teacher, but staying home with my kids right now).

Label things in your house (toilet, door, closet, toys, etc) with big words. I label toy bins in our house with words and pictures.
Talk about signs and stores when you're in the car driving around.
Focus on his name right now. What letter does it start with? What other words start like it? Use playdough to make the letter. Paint the letter...etc.

Just a few ideas to get you going! :) Good luck!

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L.M.

answers from Seattle on

Dear T.,
I have a daycare and have been a preschool teacher and center director for the past 10 years.
There isn't much a child need to know to start kindergarden; counting to 20 and recognize ABCs are about it.
The best advice I have for you is to MAKE IT FUN and short (time wise)!!!! A child's attention span is basically their age plus 1, in minutes, so your son should be able to focus for 5 minutes then off he goes.
Also being correct as soon as possible is the key to both learning and self confidence. If he can count to 10 for example, only add eleven until he gets it right several times then twelve, etc. Same for the ABCs, though the most important letter of the alphabet is the first letter in their name. When they do start school they will probably have a place with their name on it for their coats and possibly on a table where they will sit.
After that it's all about what they can learn when they're ready.
Good Luck and let me know if you'd like more help.
L. M

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E.W.

answers from Bellingham on

dear home preschooling mom,

I am also a stay at home with a boy almost 5. I have been preschooling at home for a little over a year. It is a challenge to spark interest. My son was and is verrrrry active. One thing that truely helped me was the leap frog video "letter factory" he song is catchy and he could have his letters, and their sounds, memorized in no time. Once he sees that he is capable and how you light up at his accomplishment he will take off. at this point you can find lots of wonderfull activity sheets to print off the computer, or use as guides to make your own. Also many dollar store sell actiuvity books and teacher aids. It is a wonderfull thing for mother and child to share the learning process. Good luck to you, enjoy!!!!!!

Mama Waldman

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D.D.

answers from Seattle on

I, my son, and my youngest daughter have ADD, so I have kept the radar out for years about what to do about it. First of all, make sure that there is no consumption of white flour or sugar. Keep colored foods and cereals out of the home. They are very low in fiber, most of them, and very high in sugar and. It just makes the kids more wired. Second, children with ADD often have problems getting the mind/body connection together. This can be helped by dancing and singing at the same time, bouncing on a ball while reciting the alphabet. Jumping on a trampoline while singing.

Some more research that was done showed that when boys bounce on a trampoline while someone recites facts, they are more apt to remember it. Dancing with your kids to the CD or radio is a BIG help! It really helps the mind and is a lot of fun, too. My kids love it.

When trying to teach your ADD child, go at his pace. If he can only handle 5 minutes of reading, only do 5 minutes or reading, switch to another activity, go back to reading, go to something physical, such as walking (or dancing), then go back to reading again. This worked with my daughter who is still ADD.

Also, more than 1/2 - 1 hour of television a day CAUSES children to have ADD. I don't know if you've seen some of the research on television. I get really upset with my husband because my ADD daughter has spent too much time in front of the TV when she's been at home with him while I'm working. I think now that's why she's so bad. My oldest son, who is now 20 says TV actually reduces your IQ. I don't know about that, but the ADD thing is actually a fact. The reason is, that no scene on TV is there more than 3 seconds, before it changes. This doesn't happen in the classroom with one teacher, so then the child really has trouble.

God bless! I hope you find a solution.

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M.B.

answers from Portland on

Hi T.,
I wholeheartedly agree with Erin. I was an elementary teacher too before i started staying home and preschool is not only about learning academically, but socially as well. this is my sons first year (he only goes 2 days a week for three hours. it's $10 each time he goes) and he has just exploded with new ideas and thoughts! i thought i was good about teaching him things, but you know, it is different when it's a school environment and not mom doing it. i'm not saying that every kid needs to go and that they will fail in school if they don't, but i do think that it really does help with future school success and confidence. that's why head start is such an important program. have you checked into head start? also, i know that many churches have inexpensive preschool programs like ours (no, we do not belong to that church or any church, but the program is very good and i like that he's getting some religious education that i can't provide to him). since most of these programs are non-profit i wonder if you could offer to volunteer or barter in some way for free/reduced tuition.

i'm sure your son will be fine as you are being very attentive to him and his education. i just think if there's anyway to get him into preschool do it.

good luck!
M.

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L.M.

answers from Seattle on

I would encourage you to have your son get as much socialization as you can before he starts kindergarten. Maybe a co-op would be more in your budget. Teachers are looking for a child who can interact well with others, sit still and take direction. I found regarding what they need to know are the basics, 1-10 and their abc's. We worked with "Hooked on Phonics" programs with both our children the summer before they attended school and that really helped. Regarding the ADD, get your child tested as soon as feasible, around 2nd grade. Be sure to take it seriously and be your childs advocate, the schools will only do so much, especially if your child is NOT disruptive and passes with just average grades. We waited until my son was in 7th grade until we finally figured out he had ADD. It has been a real challenge with tutors and now private school. Good luck and hang in there.

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D.B.

answers from Medford on

I'm a teacher & have a few thoughts you may wish to explore more.
Diet is v. important - please make sure your child is on healthy diet eating regular balnced meals daily - junk food is brutal.
A schedule (predictable routine) is also most helpful with ADD/ADHD individulas, young or old : ). Regular bedtime & physical activity sometime during the day is very important.
Limit electronic stimulation and focus on interactive activities between you & your children. You are lucky to be a stay at home mom with the time to be able to do this : ). There are neat teacher resources on line, there are stores that cater to teachers needs, & book stores can have great activity books grouped by age/development level.
Get connected with other stay at home moms & share ideas & resources. Church functions are great swap meets : ).
Good for you for caring enough to start early & good luck.
db

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D.T.

answers from Portland on

There are computer games like jumpstart that start at prek and are good at educating and fun for the kids. If you are concerned about the add if it is a problem in school they will catch it, but you will still need to get him diagnosed by a doctor. My son only did one year of preschool, he has adhd and didn't do well in them. I was fortunate enough that he was in early intervention through the school district and that helped him be prepared for what school was like.

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K.R.

answers from Portland on

Please consider alternative thoughts, too.

People who have stepped outside the expectations/pressures of standard schooling have found some interesting things--or, rather, rediscovered what was buried under the social design strategies of the late 1800s.

Young children, and especially boys, are not neurologically ready to deal with reading, and especially following multiple stacked lines of text--sometimes until age 9 or even later. They will meet our expectations to the best of their ability, because kids do that instinctively--but, physically incapable(!) of programming those neural pathways in a healthy(!) way, they often develop dyslexia, or fail and then believe they are "failures" at reading, or take on other self-damage.

At least one formal curriculum (Waldorf, since the 1920s) admits this about the natural development of children. Free Schools and Unschooling, because of their focus on letting the child drive their own education, also can encompass the natural energies of children in a non-destructive way. Most curriculums are just about pushing your child ... we should be encoutaging our children to grow, but do we really think it is healthy to constantly push them?

American society is hardly "healthy"--so assuming the American norm won't probably produce fully healthy kids, no mater how much we love them.

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A.H.

answers from Portland on

From my experience the only things kids learn at preschool are bad habits. My son's friend is 4 and he doesn't know any more educationally than my child. What he does know is how to not listen, be snobby and act crazy. Kids want to learn and they always will at their own pace. Something I have heard over and over again is that if you tire your son out before you try to teach him anything it will help his focus greatly. Try teaching him new things right after you get home from the park. Another thing that my son (and the girl I babysit) love is to trace letters and numbers. You can find all kinds of tracing worksheets online. I think you're on the right track, and even if you can afford pre-school that it's totally unnecessary. :)

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M.K.

answers from Seattle on

Use blocks that have the ABCs on them, foam mats that are puzzle like that have the ABCs, ABCs magnets, have a day where you and he finger paint the ABCs. Get a coloring book that has the ABCs. There are even fun workbooks with the ABCs. You can do the same with numbers and colors. Also there are many books you can read to him that are about ABCs, numbers, and colors. Before you label him with ADD be consider if he might be a kinetic learner, one who learns through doing and/or being in motion. My 11 year old daughter is a kinetic learner and her first grade teacher thought she might have ADD. We took her to peditric neurologist. Almost as soon as he step in the room he was fairly certain she wasn't ADD cause she was quietly reading a book. I will admit she does move around a lot when she reads a book; a example of how kinetic she is.

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C.S.

answers from Seattle on

I just want to second the Leapfrog "Letter Factory" video idea. It is wonderful! My son loved it and learned his letters and letter sounds over the summer when he was 2.5. All the early readers I've met in the past couple of years have gotten their start with that video.

The other really important thing that others have mentioned is for you to read to him daily. This will foster a love of books and reading, which in my opinion is the most important thing. If you know how to read, you can learn anything!

We are enjoying starfall.com and a cirriculum called Five in a Row (which you can check out at the library) which can involve other subjects as well, as much or as little as you want to do. www.homeschoolshare.com is another place to get ideas on books to read and activities that go along with them.

Hope this helps!

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M.G.

answers from Seattle on

It is so great that you're concerned about what your son needs to know and in teaching him at home. We can't send our 4 year old to preschool and she won't be going until next year as her bday is in September. I work with my daughter everyday on anything at all that she shows interest in. We sing, play games, yes even videogames-she has a Vsmile. We watch lots of children's programming and also read together. There are resources you can get online to use at home if you have a printer. If you think he might have a learning disability then try and talk to DSHS about that. They offer free programs for children who have learning difficulties. I am not certain what he'll need to know before school as it varies by district so perhaps you can call your district and talk with them about it and your concerns regarding his learning processes. You can try using anything around the house for word association games, or get bath crayons to have him begin writing. Ask him questions about his life ie: who does he live with, how old is he, where does he live, etc. To help him with math use counting games, songs, flash cards, the game memory(which you can do with a deck of cards even.) I wish you the best of luck. (please forgive any context, grammar, or spelling errors)

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A.B.

answers from Seattle on

Hi T.!
Oh, been where you are and boy have I learned a lot in the last 2 years. I have 2 daughters, 5 and 3. Our 5 year old is in kindergarten this year and is the youngest in her class. You would never know it though. Very social and way ahead of the curve.
I have 6 nephews and 2 great nephews and let me tell you, boys are VERY different than girls. I also have a degree in K-12 education (focus on Gifted/Talented and special needs.) Of everything you can teach your child right now, the best and most important thing to start them on is social skills. Before anything else, kindergarten teachers in the public schools look to see how well a child gets along with the other students and how well they listen and follow directions. Whether or not they know their letters, numbers, etc is not the primary concern. The basis for a great learner starts with understanding how to get along with those around us.
As for your ADD concern for your son, at 4 he is still developing boundaries and that will sometime make us think our children are out of control. Rather they are just figuring out what they can get away with and they are learning self control. Being consistent with everything you do with him will really help. And their attention span at 4 sometimes seem as though it's less than ever!!! If you continue to feel this, talk to your child's doctor. I'm not sure which state you live in, but in Washington state you can have a free evaluation for your child starting at age 3. You will have to call the office of the elementary that your child is to attend kindergarten at for more information. (Honestly, you might be in for a long road of phone calls, but be willing to do what you need to in order get help for your children.)
Good luck and please ask if you ever have more questions! There are a lot of very smart and experienced women on this site. I've been on both sides of this, and I know what you're going through!
Take care
A.

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A.M.

answers from Portland on

I think they have stores called the The Learning Tree. They are stores that you can go to and get preschool learning tools....well I think they go all the way to high school. Anyway, you can get great CD's there. I got one called rockin ABC's (I think thats the name) my children loved it. I think anything you get with songs will help you out greatly! You can even get them for math. Good luck, and don't get frustrated. Learning needs to be fun, when he's had enough.....that's enough make it fun. They love stickers as rewards too! Hope this helps.....Mother of 5! PS if you can't find any stores near you try the internet, Preschool Corner.com is good, songsforteaching.com and Kimboed.com. One more thing...Richard Scarry's "the best ABC video ever" He also has a math one, those you can get at Toy's R Us.

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A.W.

answers from Anchorage on

I do not have any formal training (or real experience for that matter) but I have what I think is a good idea from the stories I have from how my dad had me reciting the A,B,C's at the age of 20 months.

First of all, as with anything regarding teaching of children, calm consistancy is key. You want to visit this EVERY DAY, several times a day. You will also want to read A,B,C books aloud to your son.

Second, you want to treat the ADD/ADHD with nutrition. Fish oil supplements are mood suppressants and help with neuron development (brain cells) in the brain. You will also want to make sure that they are getting a good balance of vitamins, with a focus on B vitamins.

Third, focus first on the A,B,C's and 1,2,3's and then move on to phonics. Flash cards are helpful. Do not use the "C-A-T spells cat" or memorization of small simple word methods until they learn phonics. If the brain memorizes the appearence of the word that it is memorizing, it is less prone to want to sound out the phonics of the word. Soon you will cause a type of processing conflict that looks a lot like dyslexia.

There is a gentleman that has a free education site that you should read carefully. I agree with him that dyslexia maybe a preventable issue.

http://www.donpotter.net/ed.htm

Good luck!

A.

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D.B.

answers from Eugene on

Hello,

I have five year old and I am an elementary school teacher as well. You should look on the school district web site (google bend lapine schools). There is alot of info about curriculums for every grade level even kindergarten. There is also a series of books called "what you kindergartener should know" they are for every grade level and you can find them at Barnes and Noble. If you ever want to meet other moms you should check out MOPS mothers of preschoolers. We meet at the church of the Nazarene on 27th st. on every other Friday Morning at 9:15. You can go free for a couple times and there are scholarships available. Next meeting is Jan.25th, we would love to meet you!

D.

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J.S.

answers from Seattle on

T.,

I am in the same situation. My son just turned 5 this Dec. I am choosing to homeschool him, so I have been working on things, but kind of letting him set the pace.

One resource I've enjoyed are the Leap Frog videos. You can check these out from your local library or buy on half.com. Start with the Letter Factory. That will help your son learn his letters and their main sound.

If you are only planning on preparing him for kindergarten, the main skills he will need are color recognition, shape recognition, letter and number reocognition, knowledge of days, stuff like that. Don't stress over what he doesn't know. Let his curiosity guide you.

My son is also very active. I'm not worried about ADD, I just think that he is kinesthetic. (A big word for physically gifted) Everything he does involves big movement. Knowing this, I adjust what I want him to learn to involve movement.

He doesn't like to draw or color with crayons or markers, but he does love to paint and work with perler beads. I recommend letting him work with whatever he likes.

Please feel free to e-mail me if you just want to chat. ____@____.com

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C.P.

answers from Spokane on

OK, so I dont know really how this website works but I do know that I have been a pre-school teacher for ten years and am a mother to an ADHD child. First how are you attempting to teach him? are you sitting at a table with pencil and paper? This is the way most people think that A child has to learn to write. However using something like a baking sheet and a little craft sand provides a great tacktile experience while the trace write or draw in it with either fingers or a stick. They sell items like this at ed. stores but this works as well as a thirty dollar kit. Also Try a move ment game that involves the letters sounds or apearrance. The more active and engaging the activity is the more likely the child will be to do it? In my classroom I never get out paper to have the children write but provide it for when they want to and amazing enought I have children at three years old who sit down one day and write their names out. Granted they see their names daily in a number of different ways. Also if your son is not 'ready' that first day of kindergarten then that does not mean he is automaticlly behind, there is a curve for what children are able to do going in and the goal is to bring them to a level playing feild by the end of the year. I hope maybe this helped.

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E.W.

answers from Seattle on

I see that you have had many responses and so what I say may be redundant. As a Kindergarten teacher I'm begging you to try to find a program for your son in your area. Your local school district probably offers preschool at reduced or no cost. Head start is also a fantastic way to go. It is very rare that a young one without preschool is able to follow the routines of the classroom, socialize with other kids and stay current academically. If your son is already showing signs of ADHD a good preschool program will start working with him and your family on that. No offense to your husband but this can be very serious for your son and needs to be handled before it affects him emotionally as well as socially. Sometimes having the school point it out and talk about the issue is a more effective way for families to deal with issues that may impede learning. Kindergarten is much more rigorous than it used to be and studies have shown that strong early childhood education programs prepare students for the standards based tests that they face when they are in school. For example a child who struggles with reading in 2nd grade will continue to struggle and by 6th grade can have major issues related to her reading ability. So, getting the structure and early literacy skills is essential for kids. The best way to do that at this age is to read to your son. Make it a family routine to go to the library every weekend to pick out new books. You will discover what his interests are and he will get exposure to rich language that adults don't use in their day to day conversation. If you want to learn more about reading to your son check out Mem Fox's book Reading Magic. It's a quick read and really describes how to read aloud to your child. I can guarantee that if your son has ADHD trying to teach him the old fashioned way won't work. It doesn't work with children who don't have ADHD and it definitely won't work with him.

From my experience as a K teacher. Students who enter the classroom who can write their first name, identify most of the upper case alphabet, about half of the lowercase alphabet, at least half of the letter sounds and can write numbers 1-10 are very successful and make progress as expected. Those who struggle with their letter sounds may catch up but it's harder for them to grasp the concepts we're covering. Also, socialization is huge! If your son doesn't end up in preschool please do join a mommy group so that you can see how he interacts with other kids. Also, have him go on playdates because then you'll know how he acts when you're not around.

Good luck!
E.

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T.M.

answers from Portland on

T., Hi. I am a mother of 5 my oldest being 19yrs and my youngest being 7yrs. Through many years of experience i have learned that children will and do learn at their own pace. I sware my youngest came out talking but i know it's because of his his siblings that he advanced so quickly. Don't get discouraged be patient. If you have friends with children the same age play dates are helpfull. Kids learn sooo much from one another. As far as school, basic colors, alphabet,telephone number, address,and tying shoes were what i sent my kids off to kindergarten with and it seemed to be just enough. My 1st grader reads at a 3rd grade level and my 3rd grader reads at a 5th grade level. I never forced any extra studying on them they just simply learned at thier own pace. I'm not saying don't ever read to them or involve yourself in their studies because i do read to them and get involved with their studies i just don't shove it down their throats.

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K.D.

answers from Portland on

Hi T.!

Sounds like you have your hands full! :)

Whether he has ADD or not, I would definitely recommend using all his senses to engage him while you are teaching him. Have him make the shapes of the letters with his body or draw the letters in salt you poured into a cookie sheet. If he is a kinesthetic learner then this will help him to absorb better. I have not yet met someone with ADD who wasn't a kinesthetic learner.

For more resources, I would recommend checking out your local CHADD chapter. They have support groups all over the country. http://www.chadd.org to find one near you.

Lots of positive encouragement will help too!

Big hugs to you for taking on a big job! :)

All the best, K. D.

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J.S.

answers from Spokane on

A great thing that I found is a preschool type thing thru the mail called "Brigher Vision Learning Adventures" The website it brightervision.com
I have been using the brighter vision with my daughter since she was 2. She is 3 1/2 now and she still absolutely LOVES her workbooks. Each month you will recieve a package of a themed workbook, a new book to read that goes with the theme, an art activity, and more. Everything is based on your childs learning abilities... if it's too easy theyll adjust it, if its too hard they'll adjust it. My daughter is already writing her name and alphabet and numbers, can tell time, can count to 15 and so on. I strongly suggest this program. Its $20 a month and you can cancel at any time if you dont like it... theres no requirement you have to fullfill. We are not putting our daughter in preschool because with this program she already has learned what she would in preschool and is already ahead of a lot of kids. Check out their website and see if its something you think you would enjoy doing with your son. It's a great bonding time too. Good luck!

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L.M.

answers from Spokane on

I have five kids. (2 are step kids.) 2 of my daughters are gifted learners. (My kids are 30yrs to 17yrs.) Although I hate to admit it..... educational T.V. is what gave my kids their jump start. Sesame Street, Mr. Rogers. Barney... I stimulated and expanded from there, but that it what helped get them interested, and exposed. There is also a great computer program called Jump Start. It is different for different levels. Dr Suess has the best book, "He bear, She Bear". It is great for how the alphabet, and one letter can change a word. Also, as soon as your daughter is old enough, go get a job AT a day care. The exposure for you and your kids cannot be replaced at home. Also you will get other opinions about your own kids from co-workers. They will offer you a huge reduction (if not free) in child care expense.
If you suspect your son has ADD, there is a web site that will send you info. daily. My question is this. If medicine helps your son have a better day, why wouldn't you want that for him? If you try it, and get thru dosage trials, and you still don't like it.....YOU are the boss...YOU can take him off!
I hope this helps, good luck, L.

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M.L.

answers from Portland on

Have you thought about getting him tested? I understand that you can access early childhood resources through the school district (which are free and provided by highly skilled staff)if your child has particular needs. I have to admit that I don't know much about it, but I have several friends who have accessed these services for their children with wonderful results. Good luck to you!

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K.H.

answers from Portland on

My son will be starting kindergarden next fall, and he has attended Head Start. While I do work with him at home on letters, shapes, numbers, words, etc., Head Start has been a terrific resource and has exposed him to a classroom environment focused on early childhood education. The also teach life skills (cooperation, following directins . . .) and reinforce good habits (brushing teeth, using good manners . . .). They also provide parents with tools, advice and training to help them work with their children at home. If you can't afford preschool, you should definately look into it.
P.S. I am a high school teacher.

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M.F.

answers from Bellingham on

I am a single mom who decided to homeschool, which has been the best thing ever. Don't get me wrong it is definately challenging at times but God gives me the strength to do it each and every day. I think the most important role in helping our children to learn is in the presentation. I am working really h*** o* homeschooling with a quiet and meek spirit. I really try and stop and focus on what is going to make the most sense to my son. My son is very bright but is very hands on. He really needs to see it. So a lot of stuff made into games or interactive. So much more is caught than taught so have him involved in everything that you do. The kitchen is a great place for counting and learning letters along with learning about nutrition. Taking walks and looking at different trees, signs with colors and letters, there is so much outside to use as learnig tools plus that makes for a little science and field trip. I know that it sounds like a lot of work to have them so involved but not only are you teaching them you are tying strings with them and building their character. Children love to feel needed. Hang in there. Also about the ADD so much of that can be controlled with diet. My son can be distracted easily but looking into diet and its effects I have made some serious changes. He is not allowed sugar and we have also researched and found that dairy sensitivities and gluten sensitives can contribute to ADHD behavior. Please keep me posted and I will be praying for you. High five to you already for being at home and enjoying your blessings from above.

M.

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J.M.

answers from Portland on

My son loves the Brainy Baby ABC's and learned alot about his letters from there. He doesnt like to sit still and learn with me for more then a few minutes and starts acting silly and getting all wired up, but he will watch that video over and over. It says the letter, the sound it makes, and a word that starts with it, and goes through the alphabet reviewing every few letters, sings the alphabet song and such. It has a good mix of real kids and cartoons. The more educational the video the better I feel and only rarely do they watch tv that has no learning in it. Then I talk with them about the video, sing the songs, or point out letters using the examples for words from them. This means you need to watch it with them which is also a good thing. We also have the leapfrog fridge magnents that you put the letter into the base and it says the name and sound. That said, just remember that he is still a young child full of energy and you have to make learning part of play and life sneeking it in whenever you can (like veggies). We do actual sitdown sessions in 10-15 min max intervals and the rest is in just play and life. It has to be fun, dont force it. Many will say just make him, but that will put a bad attachment to learning that he will carry his whole life. Learning should not be what our schools make it. Children at such a young age should not be forced to sit for hours, they werent made to. Make it fun, go to the zoo, the museum, the Hatfield marine science center in newport, the Aquarium in seaside (has touch tanks), The Childrens Museum, story time at the library, etc. Good Luck, Jen

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J.M.

answers from Seattle on

My 4 year old goes to preschool, but he doesn't learn the alphabet or numbers, etc. It's all about social play and having fun and being creative. (Sort of a big play date three days per week.) (And I am VERY big on education - I have a doctorate degree myself.)

He's learned his numbers and alphabet at home - mostly through me singing and counting with and for him; and through watching tv shows like Sesame Street and a couple of shows on Noggin.

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A.W.

answers from Seattle on

I don't really have any ideas on how to teach him everything he needs to know but when we my son was 1 we bought the leap frog alphabet fridge magnets with the little box that says the letter. It also sings the albhabet and by 20 months my son could sing along. The best part about the fridge magnets is there are so many more options now. Good luck!

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L.C.

answers from Seattle on

As a teacher, I would suggest the number one thing you can do for your child is read to them EVERY DAY! You'll hear this over and over again because the benefits are real. Take him to the library and let him pick out a few books. The library can be a fun (free) way to encourage your child to read and they even have a lot of free activities. You can also check out books on tape/cd he can listen to sometimes in the car or as he's drifting off to sleep.
It's not important for you to buy a bunch of workbooks/educational software etc. If you can it can't hurt but it's the everyday experiences he needs. In the grocery store let him be your helper. Have him find the apples and put 5 apples in a bag for you. Have him find the bananas what color are they? How many in a bunch? Capitalize on the everyday learning experiences.
As far as AD/HD goes be very careful about labeling him. You must set expectations for him and be fairly strict with discipline. A good book to read for everyday discipline is 1.2.3 magic.
Also, if you are low income you could see if you qualify for Head Start for your son.

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K.A.

answers from Medford on

I currently run a daycare out of my home and have for the past 4 years. I started a preschool program with the children this last September and I found a lot online that were reasonably priced. The one that I ended up going with is http://www.earlystartcurriculum.com/index.html The minimum you can order for is 4 children, although they send you all the things for the month and it has things for children 2 and up. I love doing this with the children and the kids seem to really enjoy all the activities and are learning well. It gives them a variety each month. I wish you the best.

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T.H.

answers from Seattle on

I'd agree with trying a Head Start in your area. Also many community colleges have co-op preschool programs - with scholarships available and help with parenting issues. They are GREAT for the whole family.

Being ready for school, to help him find success early, will set him up well for the future.Read together often. Go to the library for story hour - free!

Call the school district and find out what they think he should know for K. Also many districts start registration for Sept. - in Jan/Feb - NOW! Ask them if they do or can refer you to testing for readiness and/or ADD. There are lots of techniques/tricks to help him/you other than meds. Ask your librarian to direct you to resources and books.

Good luck! You are your child's most important advocate. Keep pushing to get him the resources he needs to succeed.

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T.K.

answers from Seattle on

for a budget friendly outing - try the children's museum in Everett. One Friday a month it is free - they have LOTS of activities that foster learning etc. and it might be an active, physical way for your son to learn which may be helpful if he has trouble concentrating. I have no personal experience with ADD but wonder if this type of environment might enhance your other efforts and if you time it right it won't cost a thing. Grab another mom or friend and take all the kids. Good luck and keep up the great work!

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S.G.

answers from Portland on

Hello T.,

I just wanted to let you know about an organization here in Portland that is absolutely wonderful and could possible help you out.The Hearing and Speech Institute is located at Cedar Hills on Hwy 217 and Hwy 26.They provide comprehensive behavioral and developmental care that is family and relationally centered. Their focus is to provide care on an on-going basis, coordinating services to assure optimal child and family development.

They can evaluate your son for ADD and they also have language and literacy services.I have been associated with them for the past 7 years for my son and I am now currently on their events and development committee because I believe in their work and forever grateful to them for their hard work and dedication to our family,but most of all their goal is to make sure that every child is kindergarden ready.Check out their web site at http://www.hearingandspeech.org and give them a call. Please use my name as a reference.Best of luck,
Stephanie G.

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A.C.

answers from Eugene on

There should be resources in your community that would help you with homeschooling. It is becoming more and more popular so Check with your local school district and they should be able to turn you on to something. and If all else fails google Home schooling and that should help you atleast a little bit. Good Luck.

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T.S.

answers from Portland on

I have my 3 almost 4 year old son in a free preschool in Tigard. My older son completed two years there and it was a fantastic experience. They have a 3's class and a 4's class. It is a ministry through the church where it is hosted. It is called Southwest Preschool in the Southwest Church of Christ. Give them a call and see if they have space.

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R.L.

answers from Seattle on

Im not quite sure where you live, however there are alot of Headstart programs that you can get your child into. Try doing a search in your area, they start at 4yrs old and they go half day mon-thurs and this will really prepare your son for school. For my kids I would sing the alphabets. Also, when my boys were small they really liked dinosaurs so I went to Costco and looked in the book section and found a book of the alphabets in every dinosaur for each letter. It was amazing!!! I hope this helps!!!

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K.G.

answers from Yakima on

I have a cousin who has ADHD. My Aunt and his mother taught him at home. They found he learned a lot more if he didn't set for long periods of time but got up and took several breaks througout the day. They also had to focus one on one with him and not have a lot of other noise going on to keep him on task.
Hands-on material can help too. use things like legos, buttons,and beads for math, sorting and pattern projects. Teach the Alphabet using objects they can see like A is for Apple show them the apple and then say the sound it makes three times. Don't rush things work on one letter at a time until he gets it. Two awesome books is from the Mailbox and it's called Alphabet on Parade and Numbers, Colors, and Shapes on Parade. I use these books a lot with my kids and the ones I work with.

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V.H.

answers from Spokane on

Tyana,

There is a program called Head Start and it is great. Both of my older children attended and I am so glad they did because they were prepared for public school that way. It doesn't cost anything that I know of, at least it didn't for me. I recommend you look into it and get your son enrolled. Do not worry about him knowing a lot of things before he enters school because every child learns differently and he will do just fine.

V.

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R.F.

answers from Portland on

Hi T., I am a mom of a 10 year old son and a 7 year old daughter and have been through the preschool days. Preschool is not for learning academics, it is more for socialization and school readiness skills like sharing, circle time, paying attention etc. I would highly recommend enrolling you child in the head start program which can provide free preschool for those who qualify. Here is a link to their website, http://www.acf.hhs.gov/programs/hsb/hsweb/index.jsp. It sounds like you have your hand full, so preschool might be good for you to get out of the house a socialize a bit also.

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N.B.

answers from Seattle on

Many prechools have a sliding scale or will reduce the cost if you can help in some way. Also, some of the public schools offer a preschool program at reduced rates. Check out a co-op preschool where you work one day and trade child care with another parent.(If you have troupble finding a co-op check your local community college because many co-ops are connected with a college)Preschool is important these days because most children enter kindergarten with some skills. If you believe he has learning issues you can set up a meeting with your local public school and they will do the testing, but you may need a recommendation from your pediatrician. Call the special ed office in your school district and they can help you. Remember how your child reacts towards you is going to be much different then how he responds to other adults, and being in preschool will help you find out how he learns. Start your research now as preschool sign ups begin soon usually around February or March. Good luck, finding a preschool will not only help him learn how to make friends, follow simple instructions and some academics, but will introduce you to some wonderful moms who can become lifelong friends.

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C.A.

answers from Seattle on

I couldn't get my daughter into preschool. So, I decided to homeschool her. Just for that time, though. I looked online for the requirements for kindergarten, and preschool sites for free downloads. Then, I found an area in our house where we could focus on only schooling. I hung up big, fat alphabet letters that I made from construction paper, and put out any of her toys and games that I thought would teach her some of the skills she would need to know. And I made her a little schoolroom. Then, I dedicated a couple of hours strictly to her schooling every day. Only on real school days, though, to get her ready for that change. She thrived, and learned, and I enjoyed that time with her. And involving your 3 year old in this would give him a good head start, too. It Doesn't need to be expensive, either. I didn't have the extra money to spare, either.

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B.M.

answers from Seattle on

I don't know if anyone responded to you but I too have a 4 year old who's birthday is in Dec. He goes to preschool though but before he went he knew his alphabet. We bought him The Letter Factory by Leap Frog and it is amazing. I brought it to his school and all the kids loved it at 4 years old. He was watching it at 2 and knew his alphabet AND the sound each makes by 2 1/2. I'm totally serious. I bet you can buy it cheaPused on amazon. Good luck!

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D.P.

answers from Richland on

My son learned his alphabet before he was age 2. I didn't really teach him it. I just constantly sing the abc song. all day long and he would sing with me. I think reputition is huge. I did the same with counting and colors, with everything. I just constantly am singing him songs. Or asking what color is this? What about this color? Or I would say mommy is wearing a blue shirt. You are wearing a red shirt. And so forth. It will eventually stick in there head. And since you mentioned teaching him has been a challege, he may not even think you are teaching him, because to sing you don't need to be 1 on 1 with his attention only focused on you and what you are saying. Doesn't hurt to try.

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F.A.

answers from Portland on

Read Lee Carroll's The Indigo Children and other literature/internet articles on the topic, relax, love yourself and give your child/child all the love, laughter and harmony you can access. And then give more. Love and best wishes from Vancouver BC. ~ F..

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T.W.

answers from Medford on

I know that you have already gotten alot of advice but I just wanted to recommend Leapfrogs letter factory and word factory I bought those for my daughter for christmas and she loves them they are fun and she doesn't even realize she is learning all the things that I have been trying to teach her for months don't be too quick to diagnose your son ADD I agree with your husband on that matter he is just used to seeing you all day so it is hard for him to concentrate on you when you are trying to teach him things that is why outside help in his case (also my daughter's) I wanted to home school myself but have found that is not going to work so well for her also I think that headstart has free preschooling for lower income and its nationwide just in case you want to look into that

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S.B.

answers from Eugene on

My son was very active, he would sit still for learning his alphabet and numbers when I got a lid of a box the ones you store your files in from Staples. I painted the bottom Black and then got the clean white sand they use for fish tanks and covered the black with it.
Then he would take his finger and draw the A,B, etc; Somehow feeling the sand and seeing the results with black showing triggered in the brain. Because he was able to print the right way later. He kept printing backwards. But I found that he was a sensor llearner. I found old toasters and recorders for him to tear up with real tools, and I'd put him on a white sheet so we could find all the screws.
He wanted to see how things worked and it kept his mind busy. Today, he is a very smart computer tech.

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R.H.

answers from Anchorage on

Hey, I just saw this posting and have to pass on my awesome find...I was in the same situation and happened to speak to a friend about it as well. She passed on the information about Chugiak Children's Services. It is Headstart Preschool for lower income families and is based on need (ADD problems) as well. (There is a scale they go by based on points...income, disability, age, etc...)
I have both of my children there and the oldest can write his name now, and it has helped him socially beyond my dreams!! My 3 year old can spell his name among other things.
They even have two busses that pick up / drop off the kids from the ER/Chugiak area. The school is located on the Glenn Hwy between South and North Birchwood exits...right across the street from the Forget Me Not store (The school is a creamy building--an old school house) and in the same parking lot is a big red building.

Go by or call ###-###-#### 8am to 3pm
You will need to fill out an application which they have outside the building at the entrances!! It's worth a shot and I am soooo happy my kids are going there...It's like a mini-kindergarten! 4 days a week from 8:30 to 12:30 Tues-Fri!! I love it! Call me if you want more info ###-###-#### I will gladly pass it on!

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T.H.

answers from Seattle on

Hello - I have a 4 year old as well and I sometimes think he is behind in what he should know too, and he goes to Preschool! We have started trying to work on is letters more at home and it can be frustrating.
If you think your son may have ADD, I would find out for sure if he does or not. That can really affect the way he learns. You may need to change the way you are working with him based on this fact. I would want to know this right away. I would keep on doing as much as you can at home. Timing during the day will probably help too. Make sure he is not hungry or tired as I would think he would have trouble concentrating on the task at hand.
Just some thoughts! I wish you the best.

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C.B.

answers from Seattle on

I strongly advise trying to put your son in a good preschool. I have worked in the school systems and the children who didn't attend a preschool stood out most of the time. They were behind in their learning and also their social skills. If you have your child tested and he does have ADD or some kind of learning issue, you may qualify for a free preschool program at a school or headstart.
Since I have quit my job and have a new baby, I can't afford a full time preschool for my 3 year old. I looked into doing something at home but I decided to put him in a 3 day per week program. It's only 2 1/2 hours a day a day and he is learning so much. I pay just over $100.00. He goes to Peace Preschool in Olympia. There is also another really good one at Emmanuel in Olympia. Good luck!

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J.H.

answers from Spokane on

Hi T....I'm J.. I'm here in Post Falls, and I am new to
Mamasource. I scrolled back and found your request, so I was
wondering if you got he advice you were seeking? I had four
kids in five years, and I home schooled them all. It was a
lot of work, but I loved every minute of it and everyone says
how nice and well-behaved my kids are (well...they are now
16,18,19, and 21!). I can tell you more about my experiences
if you want to hear. I think I would like to tell you that
DON'T BE AFRAID of your ability to teach your children yourself.
Remember, as a parent, YOU are your child's primary teacher
anyway. So many moms just throw their kids in school and let
"them" teach their own kids, mostly with terrible results.
I don't know about you, but my school days were nothing
to brag about, bordering on dangerous for my health and
safety!!! Your home is safe, and nobody loves your kids like
you do!
I hope you get back to me soon.
:>) J.

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