Going Back to Work After 4 Years

I don't think your aunt would have agreed to this commitment if she really didn't want to do it. If she says that she does not want to be paid, I wouldn't worry about compensating her with money. Little gifts here and there (her birthday, mother's day, etc) from you and the kids will make her happy. Pictures of the kids, a homemade meal, crafts the kids have made would be nice. I think that her knowing how much you appreciate her would be the only compensation she is looking for.

You are fortunate that you are able to work this out with your family. If I had family that could help out, I would love to do some kind of work.

Good luck at the new job. I have several friends that do that and they love it. Especially when their kids go to school.

Hi,

First I'd like to say that you are really lucky to be in such a situation :) If you think your aunt would be insulted to be offered money, you can maybe give her gifts once a month - gift cards to places she shops at or if she likes spas then maybe a facial or manicure every so often or dinner out. Surprise her with smaller stuff once in a while like home made cookies or baked goods or pick up a meal for her one evening. I know this can count as "payment" but its disguised in a gift and maybe she wouldn't mind it so much and you have a way of thanking her. And if she insists you don't do anything, then you are lucky and then don't do it or do it less often.

Enjoy and good luck going back to work. I'm sure its exciting and scary.
Aarti.

Hi S.,
My MIL kept my son his from 3mths-1 year old. Before we started we sat down with her and talked about paying her. We brought diapers, milk,and clothes. We even tried to by a plypen , swing, and other things. She would not have it. The money issue she would not except money. We tried often But she just would not take it. I say just talk to your aunt and make sure this is what she wsnts to do. Also ask about her giving up her time and go from there also about money to. Good Luck
K.

If you decide to go the gift route, an idea I thought of would be (as long as you wouldn't insult her) a gift certificate for a house cleaning service. I think that would be a cool gift - but it would depend on what kind of person she is so she wouldn't take it the wrong way (like that you think her house is dirty). It could allow her some time for herself she would otherwise spend cleaning the house (since she spends so much time with your kids).

You are very lucky to have help. :) I would not offer a cleaning service - she may take offense. I would tell her that you insist on buying diapers/food/kids toys. If she still refuses money, then give her a monthly or quarterly gift.... maybe spa, mall giftcard, target giftcard, peapod, movie, dinner, et.