Getting My Son to Stop Nursing at Night!

Hello K.,

We all are creatures of habit. Your son should be able to sleep through the night, but he's in the habit of night feedings. When he wakes, have your husband/ partner go into your sons room and pat his back, offering comfort, but not milk. Eventually your son will realize he won't recieve milk in the middle of the night, and stay alseep. The key is for your husband/partner not to talk or engage your son, or he will see it as play time.

If you're a single Mom, elimnate the milk, offer a sip if water from a sippy cup or pats on the back, but no milk. Again, he will eventually figure it out.

If you engage, sing a song, talk to him etc, he will see it as social time & it will not work.

Good Luck,

R. Magby

Maybe he just needs to be comforted?! When I weaned my daughter of night feedings I either rocked her or just went in and told her everything is ok and go back to sleep. She wasn't hungry when she woke up she was just used to waking up often at night and she needed help to go back to sleep without nursing. There are many nights where we both fell back to sleep in the rocking chair. Eventually she figured it out on her own. If he takes a pacifier make sure you use that as the sucking motion can also be soothing. Does he have some sort of special blanket or stuffed animal? Make sure this is in the crib as well so he can grab it in the night for comfort. I don't believe at all in the cry it out method and this worked well for us. Our 17mo now sleeps 7pm-7am and hardly wakes up at all.

I just went through this. Henry was waking up 3 to 5 times a night, and he's almost 1 1/2. Anyway, the ped recommended the following: Take it one night feeding at a time. Start with the first. Gradually reduce that first middle of the night feeding. On night one, only let baby nurse 10 minutes. On night two, make it 5 minutes. Night three, just 2 minutes or so. Night four, get rid of it all together (This will be the night baby cries for a few minutes). Offer all the cuddles and sips of water your baby needs. Also, you may want to give baby a verbal heads up, like, "OK honey, we're only going to feed for a few minutes tonight. Just a few minutes then bye bye."

Here's the awesome thing: Henry was waking up 3 - 5 times a night. Once I successfully cut out this first night feeding, he didn't wake up again! I didn't have to gradually cut out Feedings 2 through 5... he just didn't wake up for them. Oh man, it was heaven on earth after 16 months of no sleep :) good luck, S.

I feel for you! My youngest is 17 months and we just finished up with this recently.

I started daytime weaning him first at 12 months.

I first cut out the afternoon pump and cut out the afternoon bottles, while he was at school. I did that for two weeks and when he seemed to be doing fine and was taking to cow's milk and my boobs weren't uncomfortable at all, I cut out the morning pump, same with the bottles.

At that point, I was only nursing in the evening and at night which continued another few months. It got to the point where he was waking up every hour just to nurse though and he was making me crazy, not to mention tired! So, I finally just said no at night and kept the one time evening nurse before bed.

He actually took to that easier than I thought. I kept his sippy cup of water near the bed and gave him that if he was too fussy, held him and told him it was "night night time" and to go to sleep. A few rough nights and he pretty much got it and stopped waking up all the time.

The last thing I cut out was the evening feeding and that was soo much easier than I thought it would be. I just hold him while he falls asleep and then put him down in his crib.

My next step will be getting him to lay down and go to sleep in his crib without me holding him, but right now, I like the snuggles!

Good luck!
-M

This is my third child, and since I couldn't see myself letting her cry it out for hours and make me not sleep plus the other ones wake up, I made up a system. I picked the first time she woke up (which was 11), and tp;d myself I wouldn't nurse her till 11:15. I was next to her the whole time, patting her without speaking... with in a few nights, he first wake up became 11:15, at which point I moved it up 15 minutes..after a few nights, she started sleeping for a longer time in between nusrning, and I would push the first nursing session by onle 15 minutes..now, her time is 4:am- and we're working ourway towards 6! It has been a much longer process than with my other kids, but on the other hand- gentler and I have not been losing as much sleep! Good luck

My daughter is 18 months and has the same sleep patterns as your son. I've read that its recommended to breastfeed at least the first year, another association recommends 2 years if mother and baby are up for it. My ped has been wanting me to start weening since her 1-year checkup and has reminded me again at her 18 month checkup. I've read that You're supposed to ween slowly or it could traumatize the child and cause you alot of discomfort. Leave the feeding before bedtime the last to go. Making sure they eat alot at dinner should help minimize the amount of times they get up at night...sometimes my daughter will only get up once at 4a.m. on the other hand - like last night, she got up about six times for a little suckle. In talking to friend who has never breastfed, her 19-month old still gets up a couple times a night, they've just recently weened her off her pacifier. My ped suggested putting bandaids on (as opposed to hot sauce) - mommy got ouwee - I tried that, and my daughter looked at it and cried...she wanted it so bad but wouldnt even touch it thinking it would hurt me. It worked well, but she still cried long and hard when it came bedtime. Then I was reminded by her father that stopping abruptly probably isnt a good idea, so I let her nurse to sleep. But now I feel like a liar...Mommy had ouwee but now its ok? The next day, she didnt even believe the bandaids. So now what? Sorry, guess this is more of a vent than help. Supposedly children outgrow it themselves. I'm waiting for that to happen. Maybe its selfish on my parenting skills, but I do love the bonding, love that if she's hurting - i just take out a boob and she's quite and cant stand 'torturing' her by withholding something I have. I havent asked my ped why he suggests stopping.

"But I have stilled and quieted my soul; like a weaned child with its mother, like a weaned child is my soul within me." Psalms 131:2

Hello K.,

While I have only nursed one child, I began thinking about transitioning her 6 months before it happened. I first offered her a choice between the naptime or the nighttime nursey. I was so surprised how well she responded to being included in the decision making process. Once we formed this habit together, I began talking about her 3rd birthday coming up and how this would end her time of breastfeeding. Giving us both the time we needed to feel safe about a new change made all the difference. At 1-year of age you have a unique opportunity to use what your son has taught you about his love language to also create a safe transition, if this is what your heart is truly leading you both to do. Breathe deeply, abandon the pressure that you and others may be imposing on how you parent, and allow your family to find your way together. This season is so brief and the bond you have created will never be lost if you determine to celebrate it together. Your privilege as a mother is in remembering this season when the storms come. You have learned so much about each other from this miraculous form of intimacy, so let it lead you into the next level too!

Believe well!

A. Z.
http://www.HomeOfficeMommy.com
Coming soon!

My daughter had the same problem, she nursed throughout the day and when it came bedtime she reverted to the bottle. This is by no means or hasn't affected any one of her little ones' and she has nursed 3 of them.
One bottle in the evening with approx. (whatever you feel he is getting) he will be fine. This way he is happy and so is mommy!
Good luck,

Hi K.,
I'm sure you know that at 10 months it is absolutly not nessesary for him to be waking up for feeding. He is only doing it because you allow it. The only real way to stop it is to go cold turkey. It may seem cruel, but he will eventually get used it it. It shouldn't take more then 2 weeks. I used to go to my baby when she woke in the middle of the night and bring her into my bed to sleep for the rest of the night. After a few days of doing this, she expected it. It was fine for a while, until she started becoming a bed hog. I finally got fed up and found a wonderful on-line book that changed my family's life. I can forward it to you (or anyone else who might need it). This book made me realize that I never truly taught my daughter to fall asleep on her own. (I used to stay in her room until she feel asleep) So, I did everything the book told me to do, and within 2 weeks she was falling asleep on her own, and sleeping through the night. It was a long a frustrating road, but it worked. This book should cover night feedings as well.
My email is ____@____.com and I hope to hear from you soon.
M.

My daughter weaned at 18 months. She was off bottles at daycare before she was a year old and only taking the pacifier at night--mostly when I would travel. However, she took it back when she weaned. I took the easy way out...I had to travel to Holland and didn't nurse when I returned. She only made a fuss once and that was TWO weeks after I got back.

Does he take a pacifier? You might try it. I am by no means a huge advocate of them--my daughter only got it during sleep times (and sometimes in the car)--but if you can give it to him before he is in full on wail it might give you a bigger space between feedings.

Also, try the book "The No Cry Sleep Solution" by Elizabeth Pantley. There are a lot of good techniques for helping with sleep troubles at all ages.