Getting My Family into Church

I've looked for churches and would usually start out going to the Sunday morning service at those close to me geographically. It's so convenient to not have to drive a long distance. Protestant churches often have a card to fill out when you're new so that someone can contact you, either by mail or in person, to welcome you to the church. You then have the opportunity to ask about the church, it's beliefs, membership, Sunday School classes, etc.

You also will get a feel for the atmosphere and whether or not it seems agreeable to you. You'll see how the kids dress. You'll meet some of the other people after the service. For me a good indicator of whether or not I wanted to return was whether or not anyone talked with me.

Many churches have a coffee hours after the service. Go to that and get to know people. Ask questions about the church and their beliefs.

Some churches have a special service for kids. They can sit with you or go to another room with that group.

In my daughter's church, the kids wear jeans and khaki's. Even the younger adults dress somewhat casually. I'd say office wear is fine.

Go to several churches and then choose the one that best fits your needs.

Yes, I think nondenominational would be a good fit for your family. Find a church nearby and most churches have websites these days so find all you can there. The times of Sunday School and church services will be there. Usually, the times will be different for those so if you desire, you can go to Sunday school then to church. Since this is your first time, I would suggest just going to a church service. Get a feel for the preacher and the people. There will will probably be a song service for about 20 mins or so and then the preaching. They will take up an offering at some point but do not feel obligated to give. That's really for the members. Visit for a while, several times and if you need to, visit somewhere else. Most of all pray for God's guidance before you go. May He lead you!

First of all, do you want a church with conservative or liberal doctrine? I chose the church we attend based on the church's view on social justice. I've known many people who attended the big non-denominational church's because of the cool music and hip sermons, only to be horrified at the hateful message behind the church's teachings. Anyway, before I started looking at individual church's I researched denominations. Once I had narrowed down what denominations I found acceptable I was able to look at indivisual church's. The church we attend includes the children in the first 1/2 hour of the service, after which the children head off to Sunday school. Some churches do Sunday school during the entire service and the children do not come into the sanctuary at all, other churches have Sunday school before or after the service, and children are expected to sit through the whole service and attend Sunday school. Children won't get to meet people during the service anyway, but should be included during hospitality time after the service. Every church has a different culture as far as dress goes. My kids wear khaki's and dress shirts, or polo shirts in warmer weather. We occasionaly attend my friends church which is more shirt and tie.

I would recommend that before you start researching and visiting churches, that you and your husband do a lot of talking about your own beliefs and what you would like to teach your children. I think it is parents' responsibility to be clear on what their own beliefs are before choosing what to expose their children to. You and your husband should not be "uncomfortable" about religion or church or your children will be, too.

Are you looking for a community to be part of or just a place to go? Are you looking for a church that literally believes the bible or not? Are you looking for a church that will introduce your children to different religions, or one that believes theirs is the only truth?

As far as being "too late", children will make up their own minds about their religious beliefs, or lack of, as they grow into adulthood. Most people at 6 or 8 have not decided what they will believe as an adult.

One church that our family belonged to was the Unitarian Universalist church. They are very welcoming to all and do teach children about different religions.

This is my advice.

I feel uncomfortable in a church meeting where everyone dresses casually. I was raised in a time where you thought of God as giving you His best so you gave Him your best, dressing in your "Sunday Best" was a way of doing that. Some people only have one dress and they wear that every week until it wears out.

I don't feel comfortable sitting next to some lady in a wife beater tank top and cut offs and flip flops. I know that people should be accepted for who they are and not what they wear but to me that seams so disrespectful to God. I know...I'm silly.

Next, if you don't want to do a church that is a bit wilder than what you're used to then you might not want to do a full gospel or non denominational. I was shocked beyond belief the first time I went to a Pentecostal Holiness Church, they were loud and they moved around a LOT! Same with an Assembly of God Church or other "spirit filled" churches.

If you are comfortable with that much going on around you then I think you should go to one and try it out. I love praise and worship time. I was on a couple of different praise teams when I went to church in college.

Some churches are calmer just because of their basic "rules?. I know some of them have loosened up their expectations too. I grew up going to a nice Southern Baptist Church and going to Falls Creek was a stoic occasion. We sat nicely in the pews, quietly singing the hymns, not standing up, not clapping on the faster songs...so quiet and still.

So, defining what you want in a church is sort of important. There are thousands of religions and even more church styles out there.

Do you want a church that moves and has the spirit freely flowing? Do you want to sit quietly and listen? Do you want the kids to go to a separate class or stay with you? Some churches have children's church during the adults church time, then they even have their own Sunday school. These are things you and hubby need to discuss before you think about trying out a church for one reason or another.

I bet you'll find one that meets your families needs.

I would look into United Methodist. They are warm and welcoming, much more than other churches I have attended. Unitarian is also very open.

Do your kids like super heroes? I would start by introducing them to your Catholic roots which you may also enjoy hearing about. Find some good books on the Saints. Mine love hearing about how courageous they were standing up for their faith. Ignatius Press has more books than I could even begin to include in a post. My boy loved the books on St. Isaac Jogues. He went out into the Indian territories to do missionary work.

Follow the election of a new Pope. This process is over two thousand years old. It is fascinating to see what is about to happen.

Take them into an old Catholic Church and ask the Priest to give you a tour. In the old churches every architectural detail was specifically placed there to teach about the faith.

Take them to Mass. Khaki is great but if all they have is jeans that works too. Find out why the priest does what he does. Every movement and word is there for a reason and date back for nearly two thousand years.

Your Catholic faith is rich in history and ceremony. If you begin to learn about it you will find a richness and holiness you won't find in other places. The faith you were born into has 2000 years of research behind it that no other church can lay claim to. The Bible itself was put together and preserved in the Catholic Church. Many of the earliest writings of the Christians are preserved in the Vatican. The Vatican Library is beginning to place those documents on line. Look at the web sight for the vatican called "Holy See." Listen to EWTN radio. They have programs specifically designed to answer questions about the faith. If you have questions you are free to call in and ask all you desire.

I surely would go find out more about the faith you were born into before searching to other faiths. I am excited for you. I love my faith and enjoy sharing it with my children. Seeing them grow into well rounded adults is so rewarding and we learn together more every day.

Find a family friendly church, K.. One that has lots of kids, where the emphasis is on kids. If there is a church with a preschool, that's a place to start. I chose this over denomination at one point when my kids were younger. They had Vacation Bible School, children's church, a great Sunday School. They didn't snub you for having precocious children, either. I learned the difference when I attended a church in my own denomination where it was so quiet in the sanctuary that you could hear a pin drop. Children were unwelcome. When your kids get too big for children's church, they need to be able to sit in the congregation. They DO have to learn to sit quietly, but having a church that WELCOMES kids in the sanctuary is key. It's the welcoming feeling that is important, the attitude. You know the difference, K., when you experience both ends of the spectrum.

It doesn't have to be non-denominational. Ask your friends with kids where they go to church and if it's a kid friendly church. Then start visiting.

Dawn

So awesome that you are ready to find a church home :). Here is what we did recently when looking for a church. First I just asked God to help us find a good place. Then one day I was just driving and a new church was opening near my house, so I got online to check them out. I emailed the children's director to find out how they ran the program (background checks for workers etc), I found the section showing what they believe, then I just did some reading about this particular denomination online because I really didn't know much about them and it sounded great so we are visiting, but really happy. I do love having a place close to my house and super family friendly. This church has a traditional service with hymns and then a contemporary service with more worship choruses, so there is something for everybody. A lot of churches are more relaxed in dress now, but dressing up is still perfectly fine. And we are just taking it slow, getting to know people and really enjoying it. Wish you the best in your search! We hav visited several places, so don't get down if the first place isn't quite right, God will help you find just the right spot!

If you're uncomfortable with religion, you might want to consider a Unitarian church. They're open to many different beliefs.

My family is in a similar situation. Try starting close to home, and also ask around locally for recommendations. Getting three kids and yourself out the door efficiently is probably no easy task, so in addition to everyone else's sage advice, find a church with a convenient time (and active youth program) that works for you so you don't all end up grumpy by the time you get in the car. =) Good luck!

If you've never been confirmed, you might want to check out an RCIA program at a catholic church. That way, you can learn more about your faith and more fully enter the church if you feel that's right for you. So many catholics don't truly know their faith and have never even read the catechism. You should at least know what you're leaving before you leave it....
Our church offers a school of religion for younger children (under age 7) during the 9:30 mass, and many churches offer a separate children's liturgy of the word for younger children during mass. They usually have to attend both 1st and 2nd grade religion classes to make their first communion.

There's no formal dress code for mass, but I was raised to always wear "nice" clothes to mass. No jeans or tennis shoes.

Also, during lent, many catholic parishes will offer a Lenten mission, where a priest or other speaker will give talks, and sometimes there is a discussion afterwards. They're always very worth attending.

Here are some sites you might find helpful
www.catholic.com The forums are great for getting any questions answered.
www.masstimes.org For finding church addresses and mass times across the country

The official catechism of the catholic church:
http://www.usccb.org/beliefs-and-teachings/what-we-believ...

You might be able to pick up St. Gabriel Radio, AM 820. It's a great way to learn more about your faith. It covers most of Ohio now.

Hope that helps a bit.

Make every Sunday a visit day for 3 months. For me, I need a church that has Praise Dance, a good choir and a congregation of less than 100 active members. I cannot stand mega churches.