First PTA Meeting Tonight - Completely UNDERWHELMED

Updated on September 15, 2011
T.M. asks from Tampa, FL
15 answers

I went to the first meeting tonight. It was absolutely horrible. It seemed very clique-ish and very unorganized. The only thing they did was vote to keep the same bylaws and approve the budget for the year. They didn't discuss any activities that they planned to do for the kids for the year. They spent most of the time talking about the school being Title 1 - which means that it received federal money based on the number of kids that qualify for free and reduced lunch. Then they talked about the free SES tutoring program which is only available to students that qualify for free and reducted lunch. There was another program that they were looking to start to take the students that get turned down for the SES Program. These are all need-based programs for children that are falling behind for whatever reason. We don't qualify for any of these Programs. I did take a minute to talk to the Principal a bit about how we could give our child a boost even if he is not falling behind. Most of their help seems to be concentrated on remedial students. I am very concerned that my son will be "left behind" on the other end of the spectrum. I don't believe that he is falling behind at all, but I want to try to give him every opportunity possible. The principal indicated that they were trying to keep the more advanced students challenged as well, but it really appears as if they concentrate their efforts most on the remedial students.

I plan to talk to my son's teacher at the next parent teacher conference as ask her to provide more work for my son. I do want him to constantly be challenged. I am just concerned here... Homeschooling is not an option since I work full time and private school is really out of our budget... We work with our children at home, but how can we ensure that we are doing the best we can them?

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L.C.

answers from Washington DC on

If you are underwhelmed - get involved. Change can only happen if people care enough to make it happen. The same 10 people get very tired very quickly. If you have ideas, present them. If you want to offer programs, research them and present them. A lot of PTA stuff is boring. You can't do a lot until you understand how the school works and who needs what. Get involved. Make some changes.
LBC

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M.B.

answers from Austin on

I have a question...... why, if you feel your child is gifted, do you want him to do MORE work? He will begin to resent that, and quit trying! He should be doing different things... not just more of the same stuff. (The smart ones shouldn't be doing MORE worksheets... but different, more challenging ones... One of my big gripes about GT classes.)

However, you, as a parent, can do other things with him.... play math games, have him help you in the kitchen (teaching him practical math at the same time), have him help with grocery shopping (have him keep a running tally on a calculator of how much everything is costing), read with him more challenging books, things like that. We did this with our kids... playing math games in the car, teaching beyond what the kids were learning in school if they were interested (my son was doing basic algebraic activities during church to keep him quiet when he was in early elementary school), but let him lead you in what he might be interested in learning more about. Above all, let him be a kid! Involve him in after-school enrichment activities... science clubs, math clubs, things like that. Keep his interest sparked.

As a parent of gifted children, I can commiserate with you that the schools concentrate on the low performing students... they feel that the gifted ones will do just fine. (I work in a local middle school and do see that, also.) Unfortunately, one statistic an instructor (I am certified 4-8 for science) told us was that the highest drop-out rate was with the Talented and Gifted group. Truthfully, that is scary! These kids are our future.

You don't mention how old he is (I'm assuming that he is in Kindergarten, since you just went to your first PTA meeting), but there are plenty of activities you can involve him in to keep his mind and body involved. Sports, martial arts (teaches discipline), cub scouts, Parks and Rec activities, things like that.

ETA to add... I just talked to my son, and he really resented the teachers that gave him more work just because he got done quickly! What is the incentive to being smart, if he is just going to have to do more?

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D.P.

answers from Pittsburgh on

Don't count on the PTA to care about your child's "education"! Deal with the school & teachers themselves.
Leave the decorating and the fundraising and the complaining to the PTA.
Am I jaded? Probably. In our school, that's pretty much what it boils down to. Just the big clique excluding everyone else and then complaining that "the same moms do everything"!

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S.B.

answers from Dallas on

PTA's are run by volunteers who hopefully have all of the children's best interests are heart. Some have very professional and organized people running them and others have the only parent that volunteered or was talked into volunteering. Each year the PTA needs to approve or amend by-laws and a budget. There was probably a small group that met over the summer to review the budget and submit a plan for approval. What can you do to help to make sure ALL of the children at the school have more opportunities??? Don't wait for the next scheduled parent teacher conference to ask for more work for your son. Call the teacher and set up a meeting to ask for extra work in the classroom or for him to do at home or ask her for suggestions and websites where you can find supportive material for him to use at home. I hope you both have a great school year!

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D.B.

answers from Charlotte on

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V.M.

answers from Cleveland on

The great thing about the PTA is that most of the time, If you have a great idea and are willing to do the work, they will be more than happy to let you.

My understanding of PTA is that they work to do the little extra things that the school enjoys. Like pep assemblies, Field trips, guest speakers, fundraisers for new equipment for the teachers like a copier or laminator.

The extra remedial things would end up benifiting your son indirectly. When that lowest level is raised the teacher has more time for kids like your son that learn quickly. She doesn't have to spend all her time, going over the same math facts with someone that has trouble learning because now a Title one specialist is working with that low achieving student. And you might want to check into it more. usually Title one is more a special education thing not necessarily a low income thing, but they do go hand in hand. and maybe it's diff in fl.

Holding a Scholastic book fair is a great fund raiser, that brings books into the school for kids at all levels.

maybe the PTA can help with a field trip that would build on a science or social studies unit that your son will be studying.

Go to a few more meetigns, find out who is in charge of these sorts of things and offer to help them.

and even if the meetings mostly focus on remedial kids, at least you will have some insight into part of the innerworkings of the school. THat can be very helpful if you need something from your son's teacher.

what about the PTA sponsering a Pizza party for kids who get straight a's. inour neck of the woods it's a staight A breakfast.
Or a book club with the principal thing. Our PTo does fun things for the kids during the week of state testing.

If you do have a kindergartener, usualy gifted programs start in first grade. you might want to ask

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L.M.

answers from New York on

Welcome to the public school system.

It's all about getting the remedial students up to average, and all the advanced students get pushed aside. It was common practice in elementary school and middle school to have the the advanced students spend their time helping the students who were below average. I asked "when do my children get to learn and when are you going to start teaching them". The answer, my child is learning by teaching others.

You need to constantly stick up for and be a advocate for your child.

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R.J.

answers from Seattle on

Sounds like it's time to start your own group. Figure out what you'd like the school to provide for your son ((which they won't be able to, schools almost never have enough funding or personelle for even legally required programs, much less 'extras')), and get a group of parents from the PTA involved in creating/funding/staffing those programs. These programs can range from chess/science/art/language afterschool clubs... to funding underfunded GT/ /sports/ arts/ academic programs... to creating a school wide program for x, y, z. ((HINT: Clubs are the EASIEST to start and get up off the ground))

The reason even great PTAs are cliquish is that parents rather naturally fall into groups regarding their kids. Sports parents, Special Needs parents, Language parents, Science parents, Politicking parents.

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M.T.

answers from New York on

The PTA is a volunteer organization, and they do not have any authority in determining curriculum. Your teacher cannot necessarily change curriculum on her own either. If you are concerned about your son's education, I would ask questions of the principal, the superintendant of schools, the board of education. If you want your child to have more challenging work, and if there aren't enrichment programs or programs for gifted/talented students, you may need to find some supplemental work on your own.

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M.J.

answers from Tampa on

Have you checked into a magnet, fundemental or charter school? I know that these are usually lottery based, but sometimes there are openings AFTER school has officially started. I understand your issues, we had a terrific school for my son in kindergarten & 1st grade, but since he was in the gifted program, I felt he was not being pushed to do what he was capable of doing. We moved to a magnet that is gifted full time. Since it is a gifted program, he & his peers are all at or close to the same level & mindset. Do some research on the different schools that are out there. You'll see that the parent involvement is a big plus in these kinds of schools. If that doesn't work, always remember the lottery will be there again in late winter, early spring. You'll have research under your belt and can take a tour of the different schools you might be interested in. Good Luck!

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C.S.

answers from Miami on

Check out your actual situation regarding your Title I school. In FL, you have the ability to get reassigned to a non-Title I school if yours is not making AYP (adequate yearly progress). Your county must give you 3 A or B graded schools to chose from if your school is D or F. Do some research and really dig to see what is out there. C.

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S.S.

answers from Miami on

Is he in Kindergarten? he doesn't need more work....he needs more PLAY and TIME to develop his motor skills and visual skills! Do not give near point work. Do tasks from far away. You will give him a lifetime of good visual functioning......SO important to future learning!

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A.J.

answers from Williamsport on

Get the books, "The Well Trained Mind, A Guide to Classical Education at Home" Susan Wise Bauer and Jessie Wise, and What your Kindergartner (or whatever grade your child is in) Needs to Know, the Core Learning Series. Amazon has both. This way you will have the material that would be covered IF your child was in the best classical public schools, and you can fill in the gaps at home. The Well Trained Mind lists all the books necessary to complete the curriculum, many of which are at the library. It is geared for advanced learning. It's great even for people who don't homeschool. Our local school is so bad, I'm homeschooling, but even if we move to a better district one day, I plan to use these guides to make sure the kids get everything they would in the best schools.

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B.R.

answers from Tampa on

First PTA meetings are usually pretty boring; unfortunately, the first general meeting must be about reviewing the bylaws & getting the budget approved so that the PTA is able to do things for the school. We tried to make last year's better by offering a pasta dinner (still had complaints - from the teachers! - that the PTA meeting part was boring. I'm sorry to everyone from all of the PTA, but that's what it HAS to be about). This year our school is doing pizza & a (brief) program, along with the meeting (people will still complain about it being boring).

Obviously your child's school has particular needs, and the purpose of the PTA is to make sure that ALL children, regardless of race, religion, family finances, etc., have equal access to the best education the facility is able to provide. If your child is a decent student, he is perceived to be getting the education he needs (while there are others who need something more - the focus of the school will always be to improve grades as a whole). The teachers will do evaluations of each individual student & they really do their best to break them out into different reading level groups, etc.

The best thing that you can do, if you have the time, is to volunteer in the classroom. Register with your volunteer coordinator to be approved to help with students; you may have to watch a confidentiality video (5 minutes) to work with children. You can then discuss with the teacher about running a breakout group of students to work on letter sounds, number recognition, Sunshine Math, something.

And please join the PTA - a lot of people don't understand that the PTA is there to provide programs to educate all the students, raise funds to improve technology at the school, and offer fun activities like a movie night or carnival. PTA can't do that if nobody joins & supports them. The parents have to be willing to put in time & work together to create a supportive, encouraging environment for all the children together. If you join the PTA, work with them on making the meetings better - suggest that the hospitality chair plan for food to be served (no hospitality chair? You can do it!), and ask the programs chair what kind of program can be added to the evening (MANY programs are FREE through local hospitals, fire stations, police departments). Stick blank paper & crayons on a table for the kids to color. We're doing our best to make our meetings more interesting (we've had sadly low attendance for several years - it's only gotten better since last year).

Our PTA board is perceived by others as "cliquey" - I'm not sure why - we didn't know each other before being voted onto the board together, our kids aren't in the same grade, we don't go to lunch or shopping outside of school - we are only working together for the best of the school. I think the perception of it being a "clique" is an unfortunate designation stemming from movies & TV, and not real life. You do spend a lot of time together in meetings, planning events, etc., and that gives you a certain level of camaraderie, but it's a good thing. At our school we are always trying to get new people to be a part, because the more people working together, the better job we do, more programs we can offer. Don't get down on your PTA, get involved with it to make it better -

SAC (Student Advisory Council) is something you might be interested in, as well. See if your school has a SAC committee & they may be able to address some of your concerns about what your son is learning, what is being offered.

Good luck -

P.S. PTA does more than just "decorate" & provide "pep rallies" - because school budgets have been cut so severely, who do you think pays for the teachers' TDEs over the summer? Purchases school supplies & covers cafeteria costs for those children whose families are unable to provide for them? Purchases new computers, printers, overhead projectors, Smart Boards, etc., so that the whole school has access to technology? Buys books for the library? The PTA. THAT's what our fundraisers are for.

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K.B.

answers from Tulsa on

All the top students at my neighborhood public school were ignored as well. There were many programs for lower students, but none for the top students. In fact, my daughter was put in charge of tutoring a child with emotional problems in 1st and 2nd grade until I stepped in because she could not make him do his work. Plus, it wasn't her job.
We found a private school that is academically challenging. I wish I had switched sooner. If you apply, many private schools do give financial aid to working couples if you ask.

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