Does Your Toddler Do This When Being Picked up at Daycare?

Updated on December 21, 2010
S.S. asks from Los Angeles, CA
9 answers

My 18 mo. old loves his daycare (yay!). He used to cry when my husband and I came to pick him up b/c he was happy to see us. Then that changed to him smiling broadly and running to us when we came to pick him up. Now, he ignores us for a good couple of minutes. (i.e. I say "Hi Noah!" he looks at me blankly, turns around and keeps playing, 2 min pass, he hands over the toy and THEN comes to me smiling and holding up his arms to be picked up) What the heck?! I'm so glad he loves his daycare but it makes me feel like chopped liver when he ignores me even when I greet him so enthusiastically. Just wondering if this is a toddler thing so I can feel better ;) Thanks!

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K.V.

answers from Lansing on

My almost 20 month old daughter does the same thing. I pick her up at 11:15pm though (because I work 2nd shift) and she is the only daycare kid there at that time. After she runs up to me to greet me, she will want back down to continue to play or chase after daycare persons husband or the kids (specially now since they are home for Christmas Break).

It gives me a big sigh of relief knowing she loves it there.

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B.C.

answers from Dallas on

I ran an in-home daycare before. This is very normal. A lot of kids scream because they don't want to leave. They'll run away from the parents and try to keep playing. So, don't be upset if he does this in the near future. They just have so much fun playing with their friends and different toys, that's all. He still loves you!

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D.B.

answers from Chicago on

I taught at a daycare/preschool and have done in-home daycare. This is totally normal. Not sure how many hours a day your son is in daycare but the average is 9 hours. That is a long time to be with your teacher and not get attached. Most parents pick up after a long day, and it's rushing to get home to get dinner, bath then bedtime. If your routine is like that...of course he wants to stay at school and play. Don't be sad. All of the kids that gave mom and dad a hard time at pickup, talked about mom and dad all day long. Of course I'm sure your son probably talks (if he's talking) about his teachers when he's not in school. He will go through different phases as he gets older, but his teachers will always be special to him because he spends so much time with them. Be glad that he has teachers that give him the love he needs when your not around. :) Your are not chopped liver, I promise!

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K.P.

answers from New York on

Yup- he does it to us all the time, especially if he's in the middle of something more fun than riding in the car! Right now, our little guy is an "only" and LOVES being around other children. He has a great time once we get him home, but you would think it was torture to come home to a house with toys and parents when he could be in daycare with his buddies!

He's especially ticked if we pick him up early and he doesn't get to go outside in the afternoon!

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B.C.

answers from Norfolk on

Oh yeah! My son did this.
Sometimes I'd come and it was ok to play a little longer, but other times we had to get up and go and the transition was sometimes h*** o* him.

Another thing he did was I'd get comments from the day care people about what a great well behaved kid he was, and then I'd get him home at the end of the day and it would be melt down time. Supposedly the strain of being good all day wears thin and he loves/trusts me enough to let his hair down and be his true self/show his true colors. Oh J.. A snack, a bath and rocky baby lap time in our rocking chair would make it all better.

The baby/toddler years were very challenging times.
He's 12 now, and I'm hoping the teenage years won't be too terribly challenging. We'll see how it goes!

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G.T.

answers from Modesto on

He sounds like a very secure child and will be a great student when he gets to elementary school. Good job Mom!

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C.M.

answers from St. Louis on

Don't worry - this will change in a few months and he'll hate being dropped off, but be super happy and run to you when you pick him up. Be glad he's so interested in daycare that he's not running to you. It's a sign that he's comfortable, happy and content in doing what he's doing there all day. Be glad this is what is going on! My daughter hated drop off from 12-16 months then didn't mind it and didn't want to leave between 16-24 months then 24-26 months cried every day when I dropped her off!

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J.M.

answers from Boston on

Both of my kids do this - my little one at daycare and my older one at the afterschool program at her school. They're just having fun with their friends. Yes, it makes me feel lousy in the moment, but I feel much better knowing that they're happy where they are, rather than counting down the seconds until they get home.

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G.B.

answers from Oklahoma City on

At my center it always made me feel good when that happened. Ti means the child is happy and feels safe there. They like it so much it's a good thing.

Nearly every child I ever cared for was like this. I can't tell you how many kids had to be pulled off the giant rocking horse by parents ready to get home and settled in for the evening.

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