Conception Question

Updated on March 28, 2008
H.J. asks from O Fallon, IL
59 answers

I feel a little weird talking about this but hoped someone could give me a little advice about the subject. My husband and I have been trying to conceive for the past year and still no baby. I have actually had 2 miscarriages during this time back in April and July and have been trying for the past 8 months since then. I chart my cycles and take ovulation tests every month but still nothing. My doctor is a very laid back doctor and basically tells me not to worry since I was able to get pregnant and that it just takes time. I can't say that I am really happy with that response. I wonder whether or not my doctor is doing enough. It has been a very frustrating time and was wondering if anyone else out there has had a similar situation and may have a few notes of advice or thoughts on the subject.

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T.H.

answers from Wichita on

My neice went through this. They paid 2 times to get the eggs fertilized and put back in. They did not work. She went to different doctors. She tried alternative methods of relaxation. Yoga helped but they think the real fixer was, she drank alcohol a few times a week. On hot days she may have a beer. She was told to quit the alcohol altogether. A few months later, she got her wish. Good luck.

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K.M.

answers from Springfield on

HI! Well I have a similar situation. I also have one child now 7 and have been trying to concieve for a while now. For the last year we have been doing some fertility treatments. I would recommend that if you have tried for a year and not gotten pregnat(this is the amount of time that fertility doctors recomend) that it is time to talk to a fertility doctor, who can do various tests to determine if anything is wrong or not! Hope it helps!

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M.G.

answers from Kansas City on

Secondary infertility is a problem for some people. I had to go to a fertility doctor to conceive both my boys. After a year with no luck I would think you might benefit from a mild drug like Clomid. There is a possibility of multiples, but it just may be the help you need. I would try to find a doctor that is willing to do more than "wait and see". Dr. Daniel Stewart and Dr. Daniel Gelbach are both Reproductive Endocrinologists and nice people (not always a combo you'll find!!) You may be able to just switch GYN doctors and get some help. I wish you luck, I know how frustrating it is!!

More Answers

M.A.

answers from Kansas City on

HI H.,.

I have an 8 years old girl and a 3 years old girl....that tells you that I had about the same problem.
Doctors usually don't worry untill you are getting old :)
So, I asked for options (not induced but something else) Then, I did a scan to check if my fallopian tubes were plugged, I don't remember the name of the test but they put iodine in your tubes and scan them to seee if they are obtructed.
In my case, they did not find anything, but the doctor told me that almost every time you do this procedure it help to clean the tubes and that I might get pregnant easily, I did before a month had past.
It is a very easy procedure, not painfull or anything, like a regular pregnancy check up where thay scan your belly.
OK, I found the name of it: Hysterosalpingogram ask your doctor if you can get one done, it is worth it and there is nothing to loose.
I found this site in where they explain more:
http://www.righthealth.com/Health/blocked_fallopian_tubes...
An other important thing is to try to relax and not worry, if you are always concern about getting pregnant it is going to be more difficult, I don't have the explanation for that, but the stress might have somethign to do.
Hope it helps you....
Mariana Abadie
www.MyKidsFirst.com
www.MaiaCreations.ecrater.com

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M.G.

answers from Kansas City on

I understand how you feel because I had the same problem. We were trying to conceive for 2 1/2 years and I had 2 miscarriages- 1 at 18 weeks and 1 at 8 weeks. I had every test done but they said everything was fine. Finally I got a dr. that told me to take 1 81mg asprin a day with prenatal vitamins. It seems like I only get preg once a year and then couldn't keep them. The doc told me that it might be tiny blood clots. Anyway, I now have a beautiful 3 week old baby girl. I don't know if it was the asprin but it was worth a try. Good luck!

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E.K.

answers from Lawrence on

H.,
I have had a very similar experience as you. I too tried to get pregnant for a year and had a very supportive but laid back OB as well. I don't have any great advice. I got so frustrated when everyone told me just to relax, and it would happen. But I think there is something to that. I ended up going to an acupuncturist for about 4 months. He helped me relax, and I am now 6 weeks pregnant. Hang in there!

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S.S.

answers from Oklahoma City on

I highly recommend the book "Taking Charge of your Fertility" by Toni Weschler. Very informative about female reproductive health and various fertility/infertility issues. Pretty much everyone I have recommended it to finds they are able to conceive within a few months of following the guidelines. I have also had 2 miscarriages (one early in my marriage when we weren't trying, and one this summer when we were), but am now pregnant with a baby boy due May 8. I also have known people who were trying for a year and after they read the book were pregnant within a month! Knowledge is power, so keep looking into it and don't give up! My prayers are with you!

D.H.

answers from Kansas City on

I'd recommend changing doctors. Maybe find an OB that specializes in women who have had miscarriages. When you miscarry it could be you that is the problem and maybe not the baby. Good Luck and God Bless.

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M.B.

answers from Kansas City on

Hi! I would recommend that you insist that your doctor give you a blood test. There are several (seven, I believe) things they test for that can cause early miscarriages. You may have to go to a hematologist for this. I went through something similar (had a healthy, easy pregnancy the first time around then trouble the next) and discovered I have one of these things. They are relatively minor--you can live your entire life and never know it. The sad thing is most doctors won't test until you have three miscarriages which can be a painful and sad experience. I don't think you really have a problem getting pregnant, since you have twice at least. It does take your body time to get back to normal after a miscarriage, so I doubt that is an issue, but you may be having trouble carrying the pregnancy and that is why I would suggest the bloodwork. good luck to you!

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K.S.

answers from Wichita on

H.-
I konw a woman who had this same problem. Eventually they found that she had some sort of auto-immune deficiency. I can't remember exactly, but it was something to do with her blood. For whatever when she would get pregnant, her body rejected it and thought it was a foreign object, so she would miscarry. They put her on medication to correct whatever it was and now she and her husband have a healthy baby. You might mention that to your doctor.
Hope this helps & good luck.

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S.D.

answers from Topeka on

If you are unhappy with the way your Dr is treating this then I suggest you find an new one.However I have heard and read that it is harder to get pregnant the 2nd time unsure if that includes miscarriages,have you had these miscarriages before your daughter?There could be an underlying medical problem.

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M.H.

answers from Kansas City on

I would encourage you to read Dr. John Lee's book, "What Your Doctor May Not Tell You About Pre-Menopause." I discovered Dr. Lee's books about three years ago and it has lead me down a much healthier life, especially hormonally.

He talks about women having periods but being unable to conceive, or at least remain pregnant and many times it's because your body doesn't have enough progesterone - the hormone responsible for sustaining a pregnancy - hence its name - progesterone = pro gestation.

also, a group of ladies I work with have hormone classes once a month, we have a lot of written materials you can read, websites to check out and also have a natural progesterone product, manufactured after the guidelines Dr. Lee proposes. This natural progesterone is identical to human progesterone and the dosage per pump is 20 milligrams, the amount women will produce in their own bodies a day, if they are producing it.

The book will give reasons why women won't produce progesterone and what to do for it.

I'm new to this mamasource forum and don't know if I offer my phone number to you or what. Let me know how I can help you further. M.

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G.O.

answers from Kansas City on

I had miscarriages as well and was told to start taking one baby aspirin a day by a friend who swore by that. I then asked my fertility specialist about it and he said that taking a baby aspirin helps something with the thickness of your uterine lining. Obviously check with your physician as you would before taking any medication.

On your doctor's response, I would refer you to my ob but she isn't taking new patients. I would check around and talk with some other obs. If you need a fertility specialist I highly recomment mine and would be happy to shar that information with you.

We tried everything to get pregnant for 3 years, I even flunked IVF because I didn't produce enough eggs. Then we adopted a 13 year old girl and miraculously got pregnant. Adopted our first daughter in Decmeber of 2005 and gave birth to our 2nd daughter in November of 2006. God can do anything, don't give up hope.

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S.B.

answers from Kansas City on

Have you been tested for infertility issues? Polycystic Ovarian Disease or anything? I know with PCD (I have) it can be harder to conceive and can cause miscarriages too. I'd get checked out and put your mind more at ease.

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P.H.

answers from Columbia on

Hi H.!
I have clients who have had some results with massage therapy and acupunture! Also, how is your stress level? What about your diet? The Mind, Body and Spirit are all connected and need to be balanced for optimal results!
Hope this helps and remember to always be kind to yourself!:)
Blessings!

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K.J.

answers from Wichita on

You do need to see a specialist to get to the root of the problem. You should visit www.fertileheart.com. It is a wonderful message board about infertility. I had a lot of trouble conveiving my 2nd child and was told to either try donor egg or adoption because my FSH (folicle stimulating hormone) was too elevated (69) Normal is 10 and under. We did go through several rounds of injectable fertility drugs and nothing worked. After one year off of the fertility drugs and trying, I got pregnant and had a healthy baby boy 3/31/06. I was 40 years old when I conceived him. I was taking oral estrogen due to my elevated FSH level, which was menopausal.

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S.F.

answers from Columbia on

Getting pregnant and staying pregnant are two very different things. I had three successful pregnancies with my first three living children and then years later in my mid to late 30s experienced recurrant miscarriage. After the second one, we sought treatment (and diagnosis) from an RE. My husband is an OB/Gyn, and while he told me miscarriage can be a common occurrance, multiple ones are not normal. So I would encourage you to find a good RE and get a full work-up. I was surprised to find that several things were out of balance in my body at the time, and with several treatments, I was able to finally have the fourth baby I so longed for. It was worth it. Please accept my greatest sympathy on your miscarriages. Mine were so very difficult and took me a really long time to process and grieve.

God bless,
S.

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D.H.

answers from St. Louis on

I don't know if this will help, but my aunt and uncle tried for 11 years to get pregnant w/ several miscarriages, thyroid surgery, etc. They finally gave up trying and she was pregnant the next month. I think she was trying too hard and stressed herself out about it. Every month when they weren't that stress would build and build over years! When they let go they were able to conceive.

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K.S.

answers from Kansas City on

Hey H.,
I had a procedure done after my miscarrage becuase I just couldn't concieve after it for 3 years. It was done by a fetility specialist. I can't remember the name (sorry) but basiclly they squirt fluid up in you and if it doesn't go thru your f tubes then you have a blockage (from mucas and stuff left over from miscarriages). I had blockage they were able to "blow it out" with increased fluid pressure. That was comfortable, but it works, 6 mo. later we got our first son. What I mean to say thru all this, is sometime take matters into your own hands change dr. if you don't like what you are getting and go further if you are ready. It's hard not knowing and sometimes you need somebody fresh.

A.S.

answers from Kansas City on

Secondary infertility is actually quite common.

In your charts, can you pinpoint ovulation? Do you see a rise in your BBT? Are you detecting an LH surge with the OPKs?

After 1 year of trying, I would also be concerned. I think you might want to get a 2nd opinion... especially since you don't feel confident with your doctor's response.

I hope you get some good news soon. Good luck!

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C.G.

answers from Kansas City on

I would like to bring a few facts to the front of your thoughts, you stated them in what you said, but I am not sure you actually thought about it. You have been trying to concieve for a year, and during that time you have concieved twice, and had a miscarriage. If you knew you were pregnant you must have been pregnant for some weeks during that time you uterus starts to make changes, if for some reason (as was the case) conditions are not right to sustain pregnancy you will have a miscarriage. Then you body starts to go back to normal, and repair itself from the whole ordeal. It was only 3 months before you were pregnant again. so with atleast a few weeks before you even KNOW you are pregnant, and how ever long it was before the pregnancy ended, one could assume perhaps another few weeks. Therefore I assume atleast a month of being pregnant. The conditions for pregnancy must not have been "right" or there was something wrong with the fetus. Your body aborted, and started to make repairs. then you are immediately pregnant again.......... it could have been that your body was not ready. Now it is taking a rest from these traumatic events, that were probably less then 6 months ago. My point is..... relax, it is obvious you can concieve. Give your body time to repair itself and prepare again for the "right" time. You can help your body get ready by eating right and exercise and make sure to take your vitamins. You will get pregnant again. Just be patient............. It will happen in Gods time.

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J.B.

answers from Wichita on

Contact your local NFP office (Natural Family Planning) and get some guidance. Alot of times, those offices have nurse and doctor consultants who will help you learn very precise fertility time, can assist people like you (us). If they think you need a doctor who may offer you more expertise they can often refer you to someone really good. To find a local NFP office, look up "Couple to Couple League" in the internet, or under Natural Family Planning. You could contact a local catholic hospital or parish for contact information. I was told I could not concieve. But when I got married at 40, I connected with the local NFP office, and had 3 healthy boys. They are the joy of my life! Don't give up! And, have some friends and loved ones pray for you to concieve. I will pray for you myself. I hope you will enjoy motherhood as much as I, and many of the moms on this weblink have!

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J.H.

answers from St. Louis on

I have had the same problem... I now am the mother of 5. I have a leuteal phase deficiency, I can get pregnant but miscarry within a month or two. My body is unable to produce enough progesterone to sustain a pregnancy as soon as I get the positive pregnancy test I am started on oral supplements. It is only necessary to take it for the first 12 week until the placenta is fully developed and can produce the progesterone. Feel free to e-mail me (____@____.com) if you would like the name/ number of my ob/gyn... he is awesome! Good luck!

J.

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S.C.

answers from Kansas City on

Hi

This may sound silly to you but it is very true. It can be as simple as needing a chiroprator adjustment. I know someone who tried for many years and could not concieve and then went to my chiroprator for an adjustment and was able to get pregnant right away. She has had several babies since.

Dr Clarke - ###-###-####. He is located between 135th and 147th on Murlen in Olathe (next to 7eleven). Life Chiropractic. He has helped my family with many problems that the doctors could not begin to have an idea what was wrong. I highly recommend him!

Good luck!
S.

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S.H.

answers from Kansas City on

Look into finding a midwife. Had a friend who couldn't conceive, multiple miscarriages. Went to see a midwife and found a problem. Now three kids.

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K.L.

answers from Columbia on

have you had your thyroid checked??? thats where i would start.
my aunt had two children and then when they decieded to have the third she had a real hard time getting pregnant and after two miscarriages they found out that it was her thyroid. once she was on meds for a few months she didn't have any problem

hope this helps

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P.B.

answers from St. Louis on

I can't really say anything to make you feel better, but I
definitely know how you feel and want to tell you not to
give up or lose hope. When I was first married I too went through this ,I lost my first 2 babies, it took me 4 years,
but God blessed me with 3 healthy babies. I now have 3 grown
children and 5 grandchildren. I was totally devestated when
I lost my babies and will never forget them. Hang in there
and keep faith, you too will be blessed. You are in my prayers. My Dr. too just said you can have many babies, but it
didn't help my grief and I too took a long time getting pregnant, so don't give up.

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D.P.

answers from Kansas City on

Make sure that you lay down "after" with a pillow under your hips for 30 minutes. A lot of women that have asked me about this before (I am prego with baby #4) tell me they get up to use the restroom...don't do that :) Hope this helps...have fun trying!!

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Y.B.

answers from Kansas City on

You might try getting on birth control pills for a little while...long enough to get in your system real good & then come off of them & sratr trying after that...ask your doctor about that first. You have a daughter, been pregnant a couple of times since, so your time will come. I know it's not easy when your trying but maybe you should stop trying so hard & let it happen. When you want something so badly...you don't realize that your body starts to stress & that could have been part of the problem. Good luck to you & be BLESSED!

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B.P.

answers from St. Louis on

I recommend you make an appointment to see a fertility specialist. I used Washington University Fertility Clinic in St. Louis. You may have a long wait for an appointment, but a good fertility specialist is a must. Don't use a regular OB/GYN. They do not have the specialized training that you need. There are a million different reasons you may not be getting pregnant so, don't wait...do your research and make an appointment.

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M.M.

answers from Kansas City on

The procedure Katrina was speaking of is a called (however maybe mispelled) Hysteosalpingogram. I had been trying for 10 months to get prego with my first. I charted, I did OPKs...everything you are doing and nothing. My doctor was laid back like yours and said it would happen eventually. I wasnt satisfied so I moved forward with some testing. I had the Hysteosalpingogram and the month later I was pregnant! Follow your intuition and take matters into your own hands! Good luck.

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M.B.

answers from Kansas City on

i would get a second opinion. i loved my dr when i was having a tough time getting pregnant. Dr. Daniel Stewart in the georgetown medical building at 8800 W 75TH ST STE 101
OVERLAND PARK, KS 66204 ###-###-####. Good Luck!

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J.T.

answers from Cedar Rapids on

Sorry to hear about that:-( The only advise I can give you is stop trying. When you are "trying" it causes stress and stress makes it impossible to conceive. I had a friend that it took them over a year with both of their boys because she stressed over it. She charted everything, took her temperature, knew exactly when she was ovulating. It drove her husband to not even wanting to do it cause she made it like a chore. Just have fun being together and it will happen when the time is right:) Good luck to you.

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T.D.

answers from St. Louis on

Hello H.,

My husband and I tried for 2 1/2 years to conceive. My problem was that I did not ovulate on my own. Just because we can conceive once or twice does not mean we are able to conceive on our own every time. I agree with you that your doctor is being a little to laid back. My doctor did some test to find out that I just needed a little help to ovulate and it worked. I was at the point where I started getting depressed. I finally gave up on the whole idea of never having a baby and God blessed me with our first son. Now we have two sons and a daughter. Patience is the hardest thing to be, however, many blessings will happen when we are. May God bless you abundantly.

Blessings,
T. D

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A.K.

answers from St. Louis on

I would advise you to see a fertility specialist, even if just for a consultation.

I HIGHLY recommend Dr. Anthony Pearlstone at Missouri Baptist Hospital. He's the reason I am pregnant right now!

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V.P.

answers from Kansas City on

Having been through IF treatments myself, I say that your doc is not being proactive enough. Do you have to have a referral to go to a Reproductive Endocrinologist (RE)? If not, then make yourself a consultation with one. I highly recommend RRC in Overland Park. Dr Lyles is awesome! If you'd like to chat, send me an email.

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B.H.

answers from Springfield on

Hi H..... I'm B.... I have 3 boys a 2 yo 3 yo and 1 mo old... My advice to you is to QUIT TRYING!!!! I'm not being hateful I promise... what I'm saying is as women our bodies hate stress and worry... it affects everything about us... moods, periods, and even ovulation... Every one of my children have been pleasant surprises... I never tried to get pregnat I acctually tried not to but obviously have been unsucessful... (my tubes are tied now!!!) so i say just relax and don't make making this child a chore but enjoy the passion with your hubby and God will give you your bunddle of joy when the time is right!

Good luck!
B.

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C.C.

answers from St. Louis on

My daughter had this problem after her first baby and then, after her second. She wanted a third. After the first one, they tried for over a year to get pregnant again. Her doctor told her about a procedure where they shoot some dye (or something) into the tubes and use an xray. Somehow this blows out any clogged tubes. He said that she should be pregnant within 3 months. She got pregnant right away and lost it. But, she got pregnant again.. right away. She had a healthy boy! But, after that one was born, and got to be about 1 1/2, they wanted to start trying for another. No luck... over a year! So, they did the tube/ xray procedure again. This time it took longer, but she got pregnant again, and lost it. Then, within a month... pregnant again. Now, I must warn you, the insurance company only paid for The procedure one time. The second time it was over $1,000. So, if your insurance won't cover it, it is quite expensive. Good luck. I hope this helps.

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S.V.

answers from St. Louis on

If I were you I would get a second opinion, or at least a doctor that is willing to run some tests. I know that I was having the same problem my first time around until they ran a bunch of labs and found out that I have a clotting disorder called MTHFR. Once I started on the baby aspirin and folgard I was good to go. A couple months later I was pregnant with absolutely no issues.

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J.T.

answers from Kansas City on

Hi H.:
If I were You I would look around for a 2nd opionion.....

I am not able to give birth, have had 5 miscarriages due to an illness....(don't let that scare you)

i can reccomend a GREAT TEAM of OB/GYN, Lintecum and Nickell
over at St. Lukes...###-###-#### I would never go to any other team of Doctors, EVERYONE on the team is the best...i highly reccomend Dr. Schieber, compassionate, will take her time with you and she has a daughter herself.

jeannie

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A.K.

answers from St. Louis on

I was in a similiar situation awhile back. I have a 7 year old daughter and an 8 month old daughter. My husband and I tried to get pregnant for 4 years and it was very frustrating. I was sent to a specialist and was told that nothing was wrong with either my husband or myself. We were also told that since I had had one child and we knew that we could concieve that it would happen but we just needed to be patient. Well that is easier said than done. We had several different procedures done and none of them ever took. I also was doing the ovulation tests every month and was getting very upset. My husband and I finally decided to do invitro (since that was the only thing left that the doctor said that they could do) and then after we quit thinking and worrying about it I ended up pregnant on my own. All I can say is to hang in there and have faith. I hope that I have helped some and if you need anything else just ask.

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S.N.

answers from Kansas City on

Dear H., You might go to your library and see what books they have on good nutrition for pregnancy. You can at least make sure your body is in the best place physically to conceive.

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D.G.

answers from Kansas City on

H.,
You really do need to listen to the doctor and learn to relax a little. I send my sympathies to you in regards to the two you lost through miscarriages. However, often the more uptight you get and the harder you try the harder it becomes. So if you can just relax and let nature take its course, then you more than likely will get pregnant again. I would want more care if I did get pregnant again, especially after losing two, so I would talk to the doctor about that. Best Wishes. I will keep you in my prayers.

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S.T.

answers from St. Louis on

First I am sorry about your miscarriages, that must have been truely disappointing. I know several people who have had multiple miscarriages and their doctors said that they do not beleive it is problematic till you have had three. That said, it is not at all consoling for you, a woman trying to conceive a baby. My recommendation would be to go see a Reproductive Endocrinologist (sp) and have them run some test, it might be something simple as a clotting issues and they can prescribe a baby aspirin a day and the problem will be solved or it might be another issue. Either way, I think it is worth a second opinion. I do not know what your insurance or disposable income situation is, so I apologize if these are not realistic options.

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D.W.

answers from Kansas City on

Your stress level has alot to do with it sometimes. Just stop thinking about it and go on. When you just go through life alot of times it happens faster. My sister went through it all and then gave up. within 6 mounths she was p.g an carried full turm. God bless. It will happen when you least expect it. Good Luck.

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R.P.

answers from St. Louis on

Time for a new doctor. It couldn't hurt. If you feel that way about him it's time to move on. As far as a fertility doctor to recommend? Call your local hospital and ask for a list of their specialists and their credentials.

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T.B.

answers from St. Louis on

We also had two miscarriages in the year prior to this pregnancy. I am currently 19 weeks pregnant and when we got pregnant this time, it was actually our 3rd pregnancy within 12 months. I had some blood work done following the 2nd miscarriage to rule out different disorders such as thyroid problems, diabetes, etc, but they all came back negative. When we got pregnant this last time I took progesterone pills (Prometrium) for the first 12 weeks. I don't know if this is what sustained my pregnancy during those first weeks, but we are farther along then we ever have been. You could discuss this option with your doctor.

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M.P.

answers from Rockford on

These things do take time--Boy, I'm sure you're totally sick of that answer! I haven't read the other responses; my click brought me straight here, but I felt compelled to tell you my thoughts, so if it's a repeat, I do apologize. The fact is, this is YOUR body, YOUR choice, YOUR desire to have a baby. It sounds like you do need to change your doctor to someone more sensitive to your concerns, maybe one more willing to engage in more aggressive avenues. I would suggest you make sure your body is functioning at the top of it's game. I think you should get a full panel of tests done, because things that you wouldn't think would hinder pregnancy (or at least I didn't) like your thyroid and your liver, really can get in the way. I gave birth to an extremely preemie baby, then miscarried before I was able to figure out my metabolism was keeping me from having a healthy pregnancy. Once I knew what was wrong, I conceived and carried perfectly to term. Research. Read. And talk to your doctor, again and again. My OB didn't really listen to my concerns, either, until much later, when she realized I was right. You don't have to take this lying down. And if you're like me, it helps do be doing something, ANYTHING, toward finding an answer. My answer was found when I heard about Wilson's Temperature Syndrome. It may not be a problem for you, but I can't not offer it as a possibility. Also, consider doing an herbal cleansing of your body. It's amazing how quickly we can get filled up with toxins from our everyday environment. (Just make sure everything you engage in is safe to use during pregnancy in case you do get pregnant in the meantime.) I don't know if this is helpful at all, but I do know your frustration. I do know your anxiety. And, I do know it's hard for women to stand up and say, LISTEN TO ME!!! Don't be. This is an important decision, and I admire you for sticking with it. Good luck!!!! You are amazing!

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C.B.

answers from Kansas City on

I personally have not experienced it but my best friend has. The doctor we go to listens to our concerns and is proactive. His name is Dr. Cranston Cederlind and is at Johnson County OBGYN, 7440 W. Frontage Rd, Merrian, KS. Has a great personality and CARES! First one that I have felt comfortable with. Anyway, she had two miscarriages in the past and he figured out what she needed. That is a difficult thing to go through so I am sorry you have experienced it. Good luck in finding what you need.

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T.C.

answers from Kansas City on

Hi, H.. I have not been through this myself, but I really feel for you, and can imagine all of the emotional roller-coaster you and your husband have been on. I can think of one alternative therapy that may be of help to you, and that is chiropractic care. I know of at least one chiropractor in the metro area (and I'm sure there are more) who works specifically with conception issues in her chiropractic work. Her name is Jena Kittle, and she is at Balanced Care Chiropractic in south OP.
She is a wonderful woman, a caring chiropractor with much experience in this particular field, and is also a birth doula.
Hope you find some helpful suggestions,
T.

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G.N.

answers from St. Louis on

Well the best thing is to relax, if your stressing so much cuz you want to get pregnant it wont happen.

When hubby and I were trying for our first, I was stressing over it I asked my dr what we could do he said to chart your cycles and when that time of the month ended to wait 2 days, have relations (as he put it) the a couple of days later do it again, and not to do it every night. I was doing that and was getting stressed over not getting pregnant that I just said "OH well if it happens it happens" so I was thinking about it anymore and it just happened.

Just make it fun and enjoy each others company and it will happen.

Sending lots of Preggo dust your way.

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D.A.

answers from Topeka on

H.,
My husband and I had similar problems. We finally were blessed with a doctor who was more proactive than those we had in the past. We had been trying for 2 years and had two miscarriages as well.
Long story short, he put me on one cycle of Chlomid, once I had a positive ovulation test I called him, we went in the next day, my hubby "donated his boys", they "washed" them and then they did an Intra-Uterine Insemination. For around $200 we were finally able to concieve a healthy pregnancy. I am happy to report that I am almost 7 months pregnant with a girl. My son, husband and I couldn't be happier...OK we'll be even happier once she's here! :)
I hope this helps and good luck on your journey.
D. Adams

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J.W.

answers from St. Louis on

Have you ever had your progesterone level checked? If it is too low you may not be able to maintain a pregnancy.

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A.B.

answers from Columbia on

H., it took me almost a year to get pregnant for the first time and I miscarried. I was seeing a dr. that didn't want to figure out why I miscarried or why I wasn't getting pregnant again, he just wanted to give me fertility drugs. About halfway through the second year I went to a group in St. Louis called PARINTS. It's a group of nurses that work with doctors helping women conceive. They did one ultrasound and determined that I had polycystic ovaries and would need help with hormone production in order to get pregnant and carry to term. Within 3-4 months I was pregnant (without fertility drugs) and had a baby boy. With my second child we did Clomid just to make ovulation better and I conceived on the first cycle of it. My point is, don't just listen to your dr. Get a second opinion from a fertility specialists. I'm in my thirties and didn't have a lot of time to waste. If you are anywhere near St. Louis, I highly recommend PARINTS. I think their website is parints.com. They have some links that you may find helpful too regarding fertility. BTW, I realize this may not be a fertility issue, but I was in a support group with other women going through the same thing I was and one of them already had a child. They refer to it as secondary infertilty. It may be something as simple as Clomid so I would definately get another opinion.

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A.B.

answers from St. Louis on

I haven't read the other responses yet so hopefully I'm not repeating something for the 100th time, but I highly recommend the book "Taking Charge of Your Fertility" by Toni Weschler.

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I.D.

answers from St. Louis on

Find a different doctor for now --- you can always go back to doctor #1 for delivery if you'd like. I did. I worked for 2 years with the second doctor before I finally got pregnant. (pills, shots, a menopause 'break' --- he was trying a variety of things before it finally worked). We had been trying on our own and then with doctor #1 for 4 years before that --- we definitely gave ourselves time. I was 36 before I had my first baby and baby #2 came 2 years and 3 weeks later (no assistance on that one) --- stayed with doctor #1.

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E.Y.

answers from Topeka on

I personally haven't gone through what you have, but my cousin tried for a long time. She even went so far as to take fertility drugs. Your body will conceive when it's ready. If you think about it too much or try too hard your mind and your body will fight you on it. I know it's not what you want to hear, but you should listen to your doctor. Once my cousin and her husband gave up they ended up having a beautiful baby girl! Good luck!

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A.S.

answers from St. Louis on

Well, a few years back i had had 2 miscarriages about 4 months apart and i was doing the same thing you were doing the kits except 4 days after i ovulated ,the doctor would bring me in for a pregnacy test ,if i would get pregnant he was right away gonna start me on pogesteron,{because they had no idea why i keep losing,icould get pregnent just not keepit }so i had been doing this for 6 months now and no response well my hubby calls and says his brother was getting married in veagas ,and was i prego or not so i could go ,so i go to the doctor get a blood test cause it was my 5 day after ovulation ,so they 3 blood test ,it said no i went crazy and said just giveme pills it wasnt worth it any more ......so weeks later we goto vegas with my pills in my overnight bag ready for my period so i can start ...well i was a day late but i mthought it was the attlitude...my sister drove to the walgreens in vegas and there is where i found out i was having my son ....when i got homw 4 days later i ran to my doctor and i never had to take nothinh to keep hem all my levels was perfect ......so there is hope when i finally let go ,it happened ...now since him i did have one more miscarrage ,but then i had my daughter so ....good luck

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A.M.

answers from Wichita on

Another thing you may want to do is ask your dr to test for progesterone imbalance. It could be as easy as getting a progesterone cream to use.

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