Christmas Ideas Other than Lots of Presents

Last Christmas, Santa asked my boys to help him spread Christmas cheer to those less fortunate than they are. He gave them each $25 gift certificates for http://www.markmakers.org/
This is a great website where kids can donate to all different kinds of charities. They can give $1 to many different charities or they can give all their money to one charity. However they want to split it up is fine.
The charities are split up into categories like "helping animals", "the environment", "world peace", "medical
assistance", etc.

Also, my parents gave a large donation in our family's name to the Heiffer Project. Instead of buying all their kids and grandkids expensive presents, they bought a farm (or several animals - I'm not sure how much they spent) for a family/village in a third world country. They gave the younger grandkids small plastic farm animals to represent the real animals they were providing to those in need. My son was just as happy with inexpensive animals to play with as with the larger, more expensive gifts he could have received from them.

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We only buy for the kids in my family. We also ask that people restrict themselves to one present for each kid.There are several people in our family who tend to WAY overdo it, and after years of bringing home too many gifts, and deciding what to do with it all, we've finally tried these last couple of years to get everyone to be more sensible. Kids don't need LOTS of gifts, especially if the few they get are well thought out. We've not had much luck in asking people not to give gifts, especially b/c they want to feel like they're doing something for the little ones. In turn, we accept them, but also make it a point to go through the kids stuff and donate each year all the unused, old toys. My kids are used to this and really get on board with decluttering their stuff.( I never force them to get rid of anything they don't want to.)
Hope you get some good ideas!

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My family was going through the same thing. We put a limit of one present per child under the age of 18. This year, I am going to ask my family to put $$$ in a savings account we set up for my daughter's college fund instead of buying things.
For the adults, at Thanksgiving we drew names and our rule is that the present must be hand made or under $20.00. This was so much fun last year, we baked pies, decorated picture frames, I knitted scarves. The presents had a lot of meaning and did not cost a lot.

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Hi H.! Try the website www.changingthepresent.org
It is a great place to make donations in other people's names. Anything from buying a bucket to feed abused horses to buying a pair of shoes for a child in need. Gifts start at $1.00 so it is great for kids to participate in, too. Good luck and let me know what you decide to do!

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You could adopt a family. Our church does this for lots of families every year. You get information on a family that is having a tough time with ages and gender etc and then you provide gifts for each person. Getting involved in toys for tots is also a good thing you can participate in during the holidays. Good for you and your family for thinking beyond materialism and what a great example you are setting for your children.

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H.,

Those are wonderful ideas. You could also do a coat drive for the One Warm Coat program that happens annually. Go through your closets, make fliers and pass them out in your neighborhood, get family involved too! You can schedule a collection date, and then all go down to a drop off site! In our family we do annual Holiday baking that we share with family,friends, neighbors, and community workers(fire men,Police, etc. It's VERY family oriented,it's great fun, and it blesses so many people. We all have plenty of things, I'd rather have a nice cup of white hot chocolate, a cookie that reminds me of my grandma(who's gone now) and the love of others any day...

I hope this helps you.

A little about me:

I am happily married to my best friend and stay at home mama to 4 incredible boys ages 9,6, and twins that are 4.

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Hi H.,
What a nice request to read! Our family is in a similar situation and recently we've given donations to various organizations in a family's name. For example, my husband and I might make a donation to an organization in the name of his uncle's family or my sister's family, etc.. This solves both problems of giving "stuff" and of giving one item to each individual. The organizations we give to provide a card for the family to open on Christmas Day. Our gifts have been really well received and loved by all.
We have donated to both Seva Foundation, who vital health services to impoverished locations mainly in Asia, and Heifer Project who give animals to impoverished individuals and villages so they can become more self-sustaining.
Seva Foundation: http://www.seva.org/site/PageServer
Heifer Project: http://www.heifer.org/

Happy Holidays!
A.

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With my husbands side, we pd for 1 month of ballet lessons for our neice. We gave my brother and sister in-law movie tickets, with a promise to babysit so they have a night out. For the little one we took her home with us for the weekend to do whatever she wanted. We didn't donate in their name because we donate throughout the year and do toys for tots, and at Christmas it is always fun to get something tangible, even if you are an adult. This year I'm getting my husband cooking lessons, he doesn't need it, but lessons that specialize in a type of food.

We have a large family, and once all the little ones started coming we felt that it was getting to be a bit much with all of the gifts (and often times we were all just exchanging gift cards anyway). We decided as a family to focus our gift giving on the children and started a tradition to get together every year a week or so before Christmas for a family party and a White Elephant gift exchange. We all bring a joke gift, Dad dresses up like Santa with goodies for the kids, and it has turned out to be absolutely hilarious and something we all really look forward to! There is now one hideous straw chicken centerpiece that shows up every year, so we all look forward to seeing who'll get stuck with it. It really put the focus back on just being with family and enjoying each other's company. We love it!

As you probably already know, you can't get grandparents to stop buying gifts for their grandchildren. :) We go through all the boys toys (ages 5 and 4 currently - have been doing this for two years) and weed out ones that are too young or that are not played with. We then take all the toys that we went through and take them to the Schriners Hospital. The first year we explained that there were children in the hospital and they were in need of toys too. Since they had just gotten new toys for their birthdays and Christmas (close together) the kids in the hospital would love the toys they don't play with any more. For the kids we let whomever wishes to give them gifts to do so and for the adults we pick names so we each just give one gift out to the adults. It is easier all around because like you we all have everything we need.

I'd be interested in what you decide.

P.

I love where you're going with this and I wish my extended family would get on board with this. I think a day trip all together would be so much fun. It doesn't have to be a huge vacation or cruise or Disneyland thing... (we can all dream!) but just something semi-local to a point of interest and spend the day/afternoon together seeing the sights, touring, hiking, learning and experiencing something new together as a family. Ideally something in nature, not a shopping mall.
That's my idea!
Secret santas are good too but my in laws stopped that because the family got too big even for that!! lol.
you could also create a video of the whole family singing carols. that would be funny!

I absolutely love Christmas. I believe there are plenty of people who are generous all the time, but Christmas is the time when you see so many people going out of their way to be kind and giving. One tradition my immediate family had when I was growing up was the giving tree. There was a time in my earliest years my family was the recipients of church food/clothes donations. So when things improved it was important for my parents to teach us to give back. we would go to the giving tree at the mall pick a child's wish off the tree and then our parents would take us shopping to find that perfect gift. It meant so much to me I do the same every year, and hope my kids learn to love the meaning of Christmas in the same way I did.
Another thing I started with my extended family this last year (got the idea from a magazine article) was to make donations in their name to charities that mean something to them. We all agreed in advance to do this, and it felt great on Christmas morning to see that I didn't get another candle set I don't need but that a need that was important to me was helped. It was also a lot of fun to find something important to a family member and see their excitement at what I had done in their name.

My side of the family decided to forgo large gifts a few years ago for the same reason. We decided that we would pool whatever money we would have spent on gifts for each other. Then, each family would offer up a family in need that they know of, or an angel tree child from their church, or some other type of charity & of the 3 or 4 to choose from, we would all choose 1 family or charity to give the money to.

Another option is if there is a financial hardship at the time Christmas rolls around in one of our own families. Like, one year my brother & his wife had to replace their air conditioning unit & it put a significant strain on them financially, so we all chipped in to help ease some of the costs.

There are many things you can do besides give gifts & I think it's a great time in your children's lives to exhibit different forms of charity. Doing this has also helped me think more specifically during a family member's birthday about something they really enjoy & will appreciate rather than just another gift to throw at them several times a year.

Hi there! We have run into the same thing with our friends. We normally do a huge party and gift exchange, but the kids end up getting SOOO much stuff, which they don't NEED. It is fun, but we decided this year to Adopt-a-Family and get the kids involved in getting stuff for the kids in the family, buying gifts, getting them coat's, whatever they need etc. Then for our "party" we will have the kids help wrap the gifts and just talk about helping others and being thankful for what you have. We are also going to do a small gift exchange where each kid picks a name and buys one gift. That way they get to help others and get a special gift from one of their friends. There are so many families out there that will barely have a Christmas, so we are excited to take the money we would normally spend on tons of gifts and use it to make someone elses holiday special! :)

H.,

My husband's family is a rather large Greek family, so I know how overwhelming it can be with Christmas. His family has a tradition to create a handmade (completely handmade) ornament and have an ornament exchange with the entire family. I know every year, there is more pressure to create "the most desired" ornament and there is no focus on gifts. It is really a special family event. I start gathering new ideas right after Christmas is over and work very dilligently to put my heart and soul into my ornament that someone will have on their tree as a reminder of our Christmas.

We do the typical everyone draws a number and the first person goes to the tree, next person can steal or go to the tree, next person can steal or go to the tree, if there are two steals in a row, the third person must go to the tree. This will keep all the ornaments in play for the entire game. Some of our family members, especially the grandparents, look forward to trying to get the special creations from their grandchildren.

It is so fun to look at all our handmade ornaments every year as we hang them on the tree.

Good Luck,

T.

A friend of mine has an inexpensive gift. She is one of 9 kids and there are well over 25 grandkids plus spouses. She makes a calendar with each person's picture on their birthday month and their name and age listed on the calendar. She has been doing it for years and everyone looks forward to their calendar.

Wow SO MANY IDEAS here! But one I didn't see was the one our family started a few years back.

We write a "Christmas Memory Letter" where each one of us write about a family memory (not christmas related, just anything we remember from childhood) and then we send the letter to each member of the family. Usually printed up on nice paper and the idea is to put it all together and then we have the stories of our childhood, or an alternate version of some event we remember differently. The youngest gets to hear about what the oldest did when he was young, etc.

We all LOVE this, however it is only working so-so because we are a family of mostly procrastinators :-/ But we really do love this and this is a meaningful gift that costs next to nothing (just the paper it's printed on and the postage)

I also love the memories we've had of when we would plan gifts for a family and then do a secret santa "knock and run" on Christmas eve.

Another idea I think would be meaningful is to volunteer some time in a soup kitchen or host dinner for people away from family. I also have warm memories of having had people share our table on Christmas (more often Thanksgiving as we would have college students who couldn't/didn't go home for the wknd)

Just driving around one evening singing carols in the car and looking at Christmas lights is nice too!

We have a large family with lots of kids so this is what we do. On Thanksgiving we have an adult secret santa and a kids version. When kids see adults drawing, they want to get in on it too. We start at about 17 and over is in the adult drawing and 16 and under is in on the kids version. Babies under 2 or 3 do not get in and is optional. All of it is optional because there are times when not everyone can get involved for financial reasons. We do Christmas eve and wait all night to open the gifts, so we have games going on and we let the kids know that the games are just for fun, so there will be no prize winning because they will get gifts later. One yr. we did do small prizes, but it tends to add up and end up dipping into spending more at xmas. So for fun works better. We also put a portable heater in a decorated garage and have lots of arts and crafts in there to keep them busy thru the night and the kids just love it. Everyone signs up for a desert or appetizer, not both along with the potluck dinner.

We are finding that getting a whole family memberships to a local attraction are great. We live in Santa Cruz and have the Monterey Bay Aquarium, Gilroy Garderns (a botanical themed amusement park great for little kids), Roaring Camp (a train ride and themed area), the Santa Cruz Boardwalk ( beachside amusement park), and the San Jose Discovery Mueseum. All of these places have annual memberships and give discounts for groups. Its a great gift that keeps giving through-out the year, and most of these places are nonprofit or donate to non profits. I'm sure there are things of that nature in most areas.

Hi H.,

You could adopt a family - google adopt a family and you'll find out how to sign up - with this, your family would provide everything for the holidays for a family who can't afford to themselves - from the dinner to gifts for the mom, dad and kids. Another idea is to donate to foreign countries - I have a friend who bought a pig for a tribe in Africa - that will feed the entire tribe for weeks - and then she sent the information about it in the Christmas cards to people she usually gets gifts for and said instead of a gift this year, I donated ____ in your name and your gift fed ____ number of families for ____ this much time. Pretty cool. Also, their is something called blessings in a backpack - feeds underpriviliedged kids who take part in the subsidized school lunch program on the weekends - at any rate, you get the idea. You could donate the amount of money you usually spend on gifts (or whatever amount is in your budget) and put a little notecard in everyone's Christmas card describing the event.
Good for you!

My husbands family is quite large and growing all the time. Each labor day at a Family Day we each draw a name to find out who we are giving a gift for this year. So in a famiy of 40+ we each by a gift(s)for one person. Christmas cards (many with photos of growing kids) are still given per family and of course Grandma still gets a gift from all but it does help with the financial strain of the times. Also it is fun to see who we get this year.

How bout starting a scrap book of sorts? Like a holiday Diary. Get a nice, hefty book of blank pages, and make sure its passed (even mailed) to out of town family. Have everyone put in an entry each Christmas season, maybe adding a family photo of that year and some basic info of milestones that happened that year and hopes for the year to come. With each year as kids become older and able to write their own entries and compare to what was written the prior year... would be fun. Make sure that it's mailed to members that can't make it for the yearly get together and have them mail it to the next person and so on and so forth. As the book ages and becomes tattered and worn, it will be full of fun memories.

In my family we choose names from a hat and buy for just one. We do socks for everyone which gives us lots to open and we stuff the socks from the dollar store. Then we eat a huge meal, and play games all day. It's about the company more than anything.

H.,
When I was young my brother and I made pot holders out of white fabric that we "painted" with designs and such. My mom then sewed them up and we gave them away to family and our teachers at school. I was in elementary school at the time and to this day (over 20 years later) my parents still run into my old teachers and they still have that pot holder.

I haven't read any of the other posts so hopefully this doesn't overlap.

In my family we use to draw names and get a family gift of no more than $50. But we have decided that with every one having more kids it is difficult to do a family gift and have it be good for all age groups. Ever since we were little though my mom would make home made Christmas ornaments and we would send them to family and friends. We have continued that tradition amoung us kids and now we are all very content just to get a Christmas ornament from our brothers and sisters. I also make one for the neices and nephews so that they will have a collection of family ornaments when they move out of the house. I love telling my kids the story behind each home made ornament we hang on the tree and they love hearing it. They have also gotten involved in the ornament making process as well. We have a blast.

Another idea I got from a friend has to do with the book "Christmas Jars". My friend's mom bought all her kids the book and a jar. The first year they did it together as one big family and then they were given their own jar. So now they save up all year long and then the week of Christmas they go looking for a family to give it to.

buy US treasury bonds for the teens and grown ups...
you can get face value ( maturity) of say $ 50
but you bought it for about 35....
Other amounts are available.
They just have to wait a few years to cash-in..

my mom and I used to bake loaves of bread (zucchini bread, to be exact), wrap them in tin foil, and tie a string of red or green ribbon around it, and give them to our neighbors and friends as gifts. it'd an idea for family, as well. (baked goods) :)
in the past, we've also hand-made ornaments, and I personally have shopped at the Dollar Store. when you're in a bind, but you still love shopping and buying for others, it really is the thought that counts, not how much you spend! :)

Last year, in addition to a few gifts, I gave each of my kids the gift of 3 hours with mom to do anything they wanted. All of my kids (aged 10 to 16) absolutely LOVED this. Each one chose something different, but each was amazing. I tried not to respond negatively to anything they asked to do, and I was surprised at how simple most of their requests were. We baked cookies, built card houses, played video games, had driving lessons, took walks, went to movies. These were all things we do anyway, but the idea that they got to choose and didn't have to share me felt very special to my kids (and me too!).

H.,

What about donate a tree in their honor-- there are a lot of environmental sites where you can purchase a tree and they will go and plant it in the forest in someone's honor. I got one as a wedding gift and I will never forget it! Also, giving gifts by dividing the age groups and they give to eachother works really well for us.

M.

Quite sometime ago, my parents agreed w/ their siblings to only do presents for the kids 18 and under and to skip the parents. My brother and I started doing this a few years ago and it's been great. My husband's side isn't so easy. Every year they have a debate about drawing names out of a hat and you give a gift to that person only. This "draw" is for all the cousins, aunts, uncles, parents, siblings, etc. What my husband I find funny is that we will participate and inevitably pick an aunt or uncle whom we wouldn't have bought a gift for anyways. Then we go out and buy gifts for my husband's parents, sister and her kids! My mom and aunt sometimes do donations in honor of a family member w/ the Heifer Project. It's pretty cool b/c you could be buying 6 chicks for a kid and 3 bunnies for another kid that will be donated to a family in need. Another idea is to bake with your kids and give cookies, breads and what not to family. I know that may seem a little funky when you're giving say a nice gift worth about $50 and in exchange your giving banana bread! I'd say discuss it w/ the family in advance and instead of putting the focus on the financial strain it puts on yourself and others, emphasize we've all got plenty. Best of luck and happy holidays!

My sister did something that was memorable for each of us. She selected a family whose need was great that was similar in structure to ours. She then gifted each one in honor of each of us. She wrote a letter that she shared with us at Christmas that told us about each member of that family and what gift they got, e.g., a soccer ball for the 7-year-old sports lover, some teenage girly stuff for the 13-year girl, the ingredients for a full holiday feast, etc. Needless to say, it was incredibly meaningful to each of us to know that a family that wouldn't have had the means to celebrate was able to join hands around a full table and watch their children open gifts. (We always select these projects on the Feast of Saint Nicholas earlier in December - it takes the focus off of "St. Nick" as fulfilling OUR every wish, but rather the example of giving of the original Saint is something in which we have the opportunity to participate.) Have a blessed Christmas!

Hi H.,
Our family went through this a few years ago. We decided to start having the kids in the family draw names and they picked out a gift for that child for $15. That way we were only buying the amount of gifts as we had kids and not buying a bunch of gifts for people. Then we also started adopting a family through our local CPS (child protective services) and buying clothes & toys for that family. We get normally a mom with 2 kids and then take our kids shopping to help out a less fortunate family. Our kids love it and it makes them see that there are less fortunate families out there too. Good luck!!

Donate to a children's home... in the name of several people or everyone!

Have all your family members put their name in a hat Secret Santa style along with notes on ideas for a small gift they really want, a book they would like to read, movie/food gift certificates or a charity to donate to in their name (decide on a $$ limit ahead of time). That way there is only one present to buy and everyone gets what they really want instead of many small unwanted gifts.

For the kids, you could have the parents let each other know one item that their child REALLY wants and what store has the best deal on the item and each family give each child a $5 gift card towards the item. If you have a large number of children in the family have each family choose 2-4 (depending on what everyone can afford) and give a gift card. Kids love being able to go to the store and purchase things they choose.

You could also have an ornament/decoration exchange among the adults or you could suggest having a "necessities" gift exchange...again drawing only one name from a hat. Last year I asked my mom for new sheets for my Birthday...she thought I was crazy, but I have been married for 15 years and REALLY needed new sheets, but was loathe to spend money on sheets when there are SO many other things our family needs. It is SO nice to receive a necessity item that you don't want to purchase yourself.

Do a photo exchange. Have each family bring several copies of their favorite family snapshot or two from the year and a multi photo frame of their choice to put them in. Exchange photos, have the ladies drink coffee/tea while putting all the photos in their frames and the guys can watch football or whatever it is they like to do. Update the frames each year with new photos. It is SO nice to have photos of your relatives and get them all into a frame for display.

Or you can all vote on one charity or perhaps "adopt a less fortunate family and donate gifts or a decided upon minimum amount each for that wonderful philanthropic feeling. Then get together for family time, games and food.

The Holidays are WAY too stressful! I love Thanksgiving because it is all about fun family time together, food and being thankful for what we have. Enjoy your holidays!

I had a very wealthy but beloved great aunt when I was young, and one year she gave everyone a card acknowledging a gift of Christmas Dinner to a family in need in the card recipient's honor. At first I was a little mystified, I was young and it was unusual, but when I understood the meaning of it I have to say it made me feel really good. I remember that gift more vividly than almost any ever, even the Donnie and Marie "guitar" I dearly loved. I think it's a great way to really share the genuine spirit of Christmas. I think it also requires a family that really does have what it needs. We were middle class, we didn't need extra sweaters and such, so this was a very special gift. You could do this for each branch of your family but also offer a Secret Santa so people get a little something to take home too, for sentimental reasons.

Like most everybody else has said we also draw names and buy for just the person we picked, other than kids. for all the kids 12 and under everybody buy a small gift. last year however we brought out board games and played as a family. pictuary, outburst that sort of game and then only bought presents for anybody 12 or younger. it worked out really nice and everybody had a great time.

Hi H.,

I feel the same way as you do. My kids are 13, 10, and 7. Christmas gets so overwhelming and after they have opened a few gifts, the kids aren't as "excited" as they were when they first started. That tells me they get overwhelmed with it all too! We started taking a family vacation every other christmas in lieu of presents (of course, Santa always visits christmas morning with something very small) but my kids have learned to enjoy family instead of just "wanting". We also started adopting a family each year. I started going through our local Concilio but have been fortunate enough to actually find some families myself in the last couple of years. That is such a rewarding thing to do with your kids. I take my kids with me shopping and we get the kids a few outfits, shoes, basic necessities and then a few toys/books. I've explained to my kids the importance of giving and helping others and they totally understand now. Last year we also made blankets for each family member that we adopted and it was fun. I hope they will carry that tradition on when they are married and have families.

I have heard of families buying books and dontating them for birthday parties instead of gifts which I think is a GREAT idea too. I've never done that though.

Another idea we do on the year that we are home is have each adult person bring a wrapped gift and then when we are all together on our celebration night, we draw numbers. The first person gets to pick a gift and open it. The second person can either "steal" from the first person or take a wrapped gift and open it and then so on. The gift can only transfer hands 3 times and then it is "frozen". You can do nice gifts or joke gifts...our family chooses to do nice gifts and we set a $25 limit. We've had gift certificates for restaurants, lotto scratcher tickets, and nice gifts. We also have the kids do a gift exchange but we pre-arrange a name exchange and make sure to get what they are asking for.

I hope this helps. I know...it's so hard to get started but such a relief when it happens. I get so tired of getting on my kids to clean their room when in reality it is our fault for buying them all the stuff that is cluttering their room!

M.

Several families I know put everyone's name in a hat (adults only I think) and each person draws a name. If you have lots of "families" in the extended family you could each draw a family. I have also considered this year speaking with our local CASA and adopting a family for Christmas. You could talk to your family about everyone adopting a family together instead of getting each other gifts. Another thought is instead of giving each other stuff, you could gift each other "services". Everyone has some talent or ability that someone else could really use :).

Hope these help! I'm totally with you on the making Christmas a little more about what it's really about and not so much about the millions of mostly useless gifts we give each other.