Choosing Godparents

I would go with the nephew and step sister. it's not really about who gets to raise your kids if something were to happen to you anymore. that's what a will is for. And the faith your children are raised with is your responsibility but i agree that having someone who goes to church and has similar beliefs as you is important. i don't think they are too young, unless you are expecting them to do anything past standing up at the actual ceremony.

I think you are right on with your view of how to choose Godparents. My hubby didn't really understand the purpose of Godparents, so he had been proposing people like his womanizing cousin and his cousin who pretty much has poo-pooed every religious idea we've ever discussed, because they are "successful" people. After we discussed the role of the Godparents with our pastor he realized that these people would not be appropriate at all. Even my own sister, with whom I am EXTREMELY close with, was not our first child's Godmother because, at the time, she was not going to church. In the past few years she has rediscovered her faith and I was so happy to be able to entrust the duty of Godmother to her for our younger son. I also think that it is important that, in addition to being religious, the person be around so that they can have regular interaction with your child.

If we have a 3rd baby, we might have to post an ad on Craigslist, as we're pretty much out of candidates who live nearby ;)

Our church encourages the use of friends and non-family as Godparents. They say that your family will always be close to the child, but if you choose a friend who is a strong believer and practices the faith, then you are serving to widen the amount of people that will be actively involved in helping your child grow in faith. All of our Godparents are in the friend category and its been so nice to have that extra special relationship for our children.

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Inn my mind, it is an honor to be a Godparent and really has nothing to do with "raising" your child. If, heaven forbid, something happens to you, the blood relatives will be asked to care for them first. The generation is immaterial. The real chances of the grandparents actually raising the child is remote. I have three birth children and two adopted children and am deeply Christian. I raised my birth children in a Lutheran setting for 15 years, then my ex-husband took them to the Catholic church, even though he never went himself. Two "kids" remains Catholic, one is an atheist. We adopted when I was 53 and are raising our 15 and 13 yr old in the Methodist church. They will choose for themselves when they grow up.

I became a Godmother when I was 9 1/2, the Godfather had just turned 11. We are Catholic, so our Grandparents 'stood in for us', but our aunt has always said, you will take care of him if something happens to me. It had a huge impact on me as a little girl. I remember a Nun living next to us then & taking care of her brother, so I thought, Nuns are very kind & sweet & take care of people, maybe I'll do that. Until I became a Godmother, then I said, No, babies are wonderful, I want to be a mommy :)
Our oldest children's Godparents are my hubby's bother & wife & his cousin (close as a brother) & his wife. #3 since we were out of 'uncles & aunts' & close relatives that were confirmed Catholics, we had to think a bit. We considered asking my brother-in-law again, but I really wanted someone from my family (I do not have siblings & my close cousins have not been Confirmed) We chose my cousins kids (17 & 21) at the time-my hubby & I are their Confirmation sponsors, so it made sense, we are examples for them as they are for our little girl. They are wonderful young adults, but they don't go to Church as much as we'd like, but her Godmother did get married in the Church, so the priest accepted them. We all hope that this may bring them back to the Church of their childhood & pray for that. Good luck & try praying about it.

I think the people you have in mind would be perfect. They may be young now, but if you feel they would be good spiritual guides, then pick them! I'm sure they'd be honored.

We choose my brother and his wife (sister in law) twice for both our girls. They are involved in church and can afford to take care of our girls the way my husband and I want. My parents could too but they are getting older. My husband has a sister they are not involved in church and wouldn't help guide our girls with morals and values down the road. Maybe you can have one of your brother/sisters be godparents again? Not sure if that's an option or not. Good luck :)

Is it an option to use friends, either from your church or from your larger Christian family? We exhausted our use of family with our first two boys (sibs weren't married at the time...so we have spouses...but even our sibs are not as church-oriented as we'd like, muchless spouses) and I'm wondering what we're going to do for godparents for #3. I'm debating about asking my best friend, whom I met working at a Lutheran camp. Personally, I'd feel uncomfortable asking kids to be godparents--but--you know them and if you feel it's a good idea, go for it!! As someone pointed out, that might be a great way to help the kids along in their spiritual growth, too.

When my husband and I had our daughter, we each had 2 children from previous marriages. My two girls were 10 and 12. His two children were toddlers who had never been baptized. So, between my 2 girls, 2 of my brothers, my husband's sister and her husband, we covered all 3 children. In other words, no, 10 1/2 is not too young. As a matter-of-fact, my youngest daughter and her god mother became best of friends. There was only 10 years between them.

It's a tough decision. I just baptized my daughter and we agonized over picking godparents(I thought picking bridesmaids was easier)! Personally, I think that might be too young but that's your call.

Do you have friends who you could choose-someone from your church. My godparents are friends of my parents and I couldn't have asked for a better godmother!

Not to young, I think. I think that's it's good to that you're avoiding the upper generation (no offense to them...lol i did the same). I ended up picking my 18 year old sister for my son who's due in July. I think your parents would understand....

For us the whole reason for doing it at all is to ensure someone to take over the spiritual guidance of your child if you are no longer able. i.e., someone who will pick them up on Sunday morning and get them to church on your behalf; someone to guide them and ensure they go through the confirmation process when they are the age to do so, etc. It is not really about making the godparent feel good or special. It is about assigning responsibility for your child to someone able to handle it.

Choose wisely. It does make it a difficult decision when your own family doesn't practice the faith in the manner that you do. They may not understand the ramifications of being named Godparent fully.

I don't think you are making too big a deal of it at all. But I would be surprised if some of your non-attending family doesn't understand how you reach your decision.

Blessings, whomever you ask to take on the responsibility...

Hi,
You don't say what religion you are but in the Catholic Church there are age guidlines:
"be not less than 16 years of age, unless a different age has been stipulated by the diocesan Bishop, or unless the parish priest or the minister considers that there is a just reason for an exception to be made;" [Canon Law # 874.1.2]
There are also other guidelines which are well explained at the following website (http://www.catholicdoors.com/faq/qu82.htm) and that is why each of my daughters was blessed with three Godparents. It's a really hard decision, good luck.

Dear J.!

THANK YOU for taking this seriously. Making promises to God, the baptized and the congregation is serious business, no matter what the world says! All our children deserve to have other people in their lives who can show them what it means to grow a deeper relationship with the One who loves them most: God. If the young people you mentioned try their best to honor that relationship already, all the better. Perhaps, as another poster mentioned, it may make them think about the example they are setting to his/her godchild. Have a conversation with those you are considering as godparents. Look with them at the promises they may be making to their godchild, ask them what kind of ways they can think of now to help keep those promises. The answers will help you determine their fittingness for the job.

God bless your efforts. It is well worth the time, thought and prayer you are investing.

I honestly don't think Godparents take on the role of parents in the event of the parents demise. I think in the eyes of the law, being a Godparent doesn't automatically qualify those particular people to be legal guardians. That being said....my hubby and I are Catholic. When my husband and I chose Godparents for our 1st born, we chose one set of Catholic Godparents (my brother and sis) and one set that are DEVOUT born again Christian (my SIL and her hubby). We chose these people because we wanted our son to have the Catholic traditions in our absence. We actually chose my SIL and BIL out of respect for their close relationship with our son and also because they were so spiritual. Little did I know that this would backfire on us. Their are VERY dedicated to THEIR faith and THEIR church and tend to degrade the pratices of the catholic church. As a matter of fact, neither BIL and SIL actually came to mass that day, just slipped in quietly at the end of mass to be present for the actual baptism.

Knowing what I know now, we have (under some duress) selected the same folks for our 2nd born's Godparents (our baby will be baptized in a Catholic church in July). While I may not entirely agree with SIL and BIL beliefs, I'm trying not to hurt feelings and they DO love my boys with every ounce of their souls. Therefore, I've chosen to overlook their extreme beliefs and just recognize that they believe very deeply in God, and I guess I consider THAT to be most important.

I think you are choosing wisely... of course you really don't know what the 10 year old is going to be like in 8-10 years but I definitly think when you are picking godparents they need to be a good spiritual guide/ role model. My sister has her feelings hurt that none of the rest of us siblings have asked her to be a godmother but she isn't living out her faith right now and that is very important to us. I mean... isn't that what being a godparent is all about?