Breastfeeding Issues - Havertown,PA

Updated on April 19, 2010
J.W. asks from Springfield, PA
25 answers

My daughter is less than 2 weeks old and I'm struggling this time around with breastfeeding. I also have an almost 4-year old at the house, so trying to divide time I don't have is getting to be stressful. I'm extremely committed to breastfeeding and I'm trying to figure out if my milk supply is low, she hardly ever seems satisfied for a long period of time. I was told to supplement her with an ounce or two of formula if I think she's still hungry but am worried that then my milk supply won't keep up. I always thought I should nurse her on demand, which seems like it's constant and I keep hearing mixed messages. I hear that I should nurse on demand and that will increase my supply, but then I hear on the other side that I don't want her using me as a pacifier b/c that will impact my milk supply. I also forget how long before we can get to a point where I don't feel she's camped out on my breast 24-hours a day. I don't remember it being this hard with my first, but I also realize that may be b/c he was my first and I could devote 100% of my time to him. So many people in my family are just saying, give her a bottle...it was fine for my kids. The problem is that's not the support I need and noone understands how devastated I will be if I can't breastfeed my daughter like I did my son. Does anyone first have answers to some of the milk supply questions and overall breastfeeding and then second any advice on breastfeeding with a preschooler at home so that you don't feel you're neglecting your first child. Thank you in advance for any thoughts or advice.

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So What Happened?

I want to thank all the Moms for your great responses and support. I definitely feel like it was a growth spurt and even the past couple days have been SO much easier. You confirmed my gut reaction, but when your pediatrician and everyone else is telling you to supplement you start to doubt yourself. I stopped giving her any formula at all and when we went to our two week appt she was 4 ounces ABOVE her birth weight so obviously she's getting enough. She basically gained one lb in 10 days from when we left the hospital. She's starting to sleep better in between feedings and seems much more satisfied after she eats. All your responses were tremendously helpful and made me feel like what we were going through was completely normal especially the few days of constant nursing. So, thank you again for all your great feedback and I feel 100% better and confident that I will nurse her as long as I did my son, hopefully!

More Answers

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L.N.

answers from Indianapolis on

I nursed three childen. Each one is different, but like Sandy says the best thing to do is follow the babies lead. 2 weeks is still very early and you are still establishing your supply. If you supplement with formula now you will interfere with the supply and demand. As long as your baby is having 4-6 wet diapers a day and is gaining weight then your milk should be enough.
Tell your family that it is very important to you to nurse this child and, even if it was ok for them to "just give the baby a bottle" that isn't what you want to do and that what you really need from them is for them to support you in what you feel is important to you, in this case not to undermine your breast feeding of this child. Breast milk is what nature intends for babies to be fed. Formula is fine, but it is only a subsitute for the best food for a baby. Scientists are always discovering some new substance or nutrient that is in breast milk that formula doesn't have. Why not give your child the best?
As far as nursing with an older child, I would get a little "feeding station" going on the chouch. Get a glass of water for yourself, have your son get some of his favorite toys and books nearby and when it is time to nurse have him come and sit by your side and you can read a book to him while you sit with baby. You can enlist his help turning the pages of the book and it can be your special time together. You can build him up by emphasizing how big he is and what a good big brother he is, he can get diapers for you and other little helping things.
You can have him play nearby,maybe work on puzzels, color etc. If he is bored with baby and you always nursing baby, you can tell him when he was little you nursed him like this also and look how big he has grown and his baby sister will grow bigger also. You can also have a bunch of videos and when it is nursing time he can settle down to watch a video with you. On nice days you can sit outside with him and let him play nearby. You can use a blanket over babies head to cover up if you feel you need to.
There is a poem that I recall that goes "Cleaning and scrubbing can wait
settle down cobwebs, dust go to sleep. I'm NURSING my baby, and babies don't keep!" In other words this will be a very short time where your baby is so "needy" and as someone once told me "this too shall pass" when I complained about the neverending needs of my baby.

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S.W.

answers from Eugene on

The best advice I ever got with breastfeeding is follow baby's guide and do what feels right. I think that the baby needs to nurse a lot and it feels right to you to nurse on demand. That will only increase your supply. Baby "using you as a pacifier" is kind of silly if you ask me. Do you think they had pacifiers hundreds of years ago? No, in actuality, some baby's use pacifiers as substitute breasts! Let your baby be your guide and nurse as she needs. It is okay if she nurses for 45 minutes every 1 1/2, etc. You are giving her what she needs. Giving the baby formula will only throw off the supply and demand aspect of nursing and reduce your supply. As long as she is gaining weight then I would not be too concerned about her nursing "too much". That being said, it can be challenging to nurse all day with an older child. Try to find ways that make nursing easier for you. I nursed my daughter in the moby wrap or with "my breast friend" around my waist and a hooter hider for modesty (that lasted about 2 weeks then I said who cares :)) to make it so that I could be mobile. I didn't have other children of my own to chase around, but I was nannying older children and didn't want to sit all day due to broken tailbown from childbirth. Just do whatever you can to make nursing easier for you and baby in a way that allows you to interact with your older child. Hope this helps!

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B.F.

answers from Toledo on

Keep on nursing!
Milk supply comes from nursing, so I would strongly advise against additionally giving her formula. It sounds like you really desire to nurse your baby, so just stick with it! This stage won't last for long, I promise! Maybe she is even going thorugh a growth spurt? Soon enough, it will slow down and become more regular.
I feel like I was just there, I have a 4 year old and a 10 mo year old. I was also worried about my 4 yr old so much and him feeling left out, and about creating patterns with my daughter (like being a pacifier) that wouldn't work with 2 children! My best advice, don't stress!!
I read to my son while nursing a lot in the beginning, or gave him books or another quiet activity so I could focus on my new baby and create that bond.
We had some troubles, he acted out a lot no matter how much attention I gave...but now it has faded, he has adjusted to sharing his mommy! It was important to give him a job, or tell him what we would do after I was done nursing. I woudl read a lot of big sibling books, some even show the mom nursing (of course she is using a blanket or something). Remind him how much you love him, play music while nursing, offer him a special snack right before, 4 year olds love routine and rules so maybe even do a special place for each of you and/or quiet activity box for every time you nurse?
Things will just work out in time.
Both children will feel your love!
Good luck!

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D.C.

answers from Pittsburgh on

You've got a lot of good advice here, so I'll just add a few comments. It took until about 4-6 weeks for my little one to settle into a "every 2.5-3 hours" nursing pattern, so you should be almost there.

A great online resource is www.kellymom.com The site posts evidence based advice on breastfeeding (ie, she cites scientific research articles for what is on there). I've found this site to be invaluable, and go to it often.

If you don't already have one, you might try a Moby Wrap or something similar. It is a wrap to carry your newborn in hands-free. I put my infant in it while I sit on the floor to play with my preschooler. If you are interested in babywearing, but don't feel ready to jump into buying a wrap without trying, contact your local babywearing group (http://www.granolababies.com/babywearing-groups/info_27.h.... They will probably have a lending library where you can try out some different carriers and they can show you first-hand how to do it safely.

Good luck!

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V.B.

answers from Houston on

If she is just 2 weeks old, then you DEFINITELY want to nurse on demand at this point to build up your supply. I would NOT supplement right now so that you can get the supply/demand down. Most pediatricians, sadly, are not pro-nursing and actually don't know a whole lot about it, so they will tell you to supplement because that's the easiest fix. You really do need to feed her when she's hungry for at least the first month or two and she will settle into a feeding schedule (mine did this more or less on their own). It seems tough right now, but I promise you, at 2 weeks old she isn't using you as a pacifier....she really does need to nurse. Just keep it up for another few weeks and I would bet she will begin to spread those feedings out.

As for nursing with another child in the house....I would say that at almost 4 years old, you can have him play quietly in his room with something or set him up with some play dough or other art/craft so that he is occupied while you're nursing. My daughter was only 2 1/2 when my son was born and she decided when he was a month old that she wanted to potty train. I can't tell you how many times I had to sit on a stool in the bathroom while nursing my son. You just get better at nursing on the run, so to speak. You are not neglecting him by spending time with the baby....it's just reality. You can also have him bring you books and you can read to him while you're nursing. You don't have to ignore him, but he has to understand that his sister needs to eat and that requires some of Mommy's time.

Just remember that it is an adjustment for ALL of you and that it will take time. You can and will successfully breastfeed your baby. Your son will learn how to be the big brother and he will love that baby girl! Make sure you keep him involved and let him help whenever you can. Let him get you the diapers to change her, let him bring her a toy or a burp cloth or whatever it is you might need that is within his reach. Let him help put her paci in her mouth or help push the stroller when you're out. The more he feels involved, the less he'll feel like she is taking your time and attention away. It doesn't have to be one or the other. You can all do this together! I know you asked specifically about breastfeeding, so I hope you got some answers there. The first few weeks really are the hardest. I had a terrible time getting my son to latch correctly and it took nearly a month before I had that part down, so don't beat yourself up. You'll get there, mama! Kudos to you for realizing how important breastfeeding is and for wanting that for your baby. :-)

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A.P.

answers from Allentown on

First of all, kudos to you for reaching out for help! I know that this part of a newborns life is so demanding & it's really challenging at times. But it will be improving soon!

First of all, the chances of you having a supply issue right now are *extremely* small! Most women have an over-supply at this age, however, that being said, you may not feel that way b/c this isn't your first baby & your body already may have figured out that you gave birth to one child & not an army.

It's normal for a newborn to nurse very often! Especially if she's hitting her 3 wk growth spurt a little early. (3 wks, 6 wks, 3 mos & 6 mos tend to be the big ones). Do you have a good baby sling? That made my life SO much easier when I had my newborn & my preschooler! I could nurse (or even just carry) my newborn hands-free while tending to my older childs needs. Both were happy as a result, which made life a lot easier for me. I happen to know for a fact that there's an excellent, local sling company that advertises in the Mamasource directory & offers a discount! ;-)

Have you contacted a LLL Leader yet? She may be able to offer you some additional tips & suggestions? I assume that the latch is good since you're not complaining of pain?

Stick to your guns & hold off on offering bottles/artificial nipples till 6-8 wks to give you a better chance of success. You CAN do this! You are going to do an excellent job! Sounds like you already are to me!

Keep up the great work, mama!!!! (And get treat yourself & your family to a good sling! It really will make life easier!)

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E.F.

answers from Pittsburgh on

I'm hoping that you are also seeing a LC or at least someone from LLL (though they may freak at the idea of any formula) but here's what I did in my situation. My son was not back up to birthweight at 3 weeks, despite nursing 10 times a day (every 2.5 hours, around the clock). So I nursed, then pumped, and then fed him a bottle of what ever breastmilk I had pumped the last time, and then formula if he wanted it. It was an incredible amount of works (took about 2 hours out of every 2.5-- just time to go to the bathroom and then start over again) but we made it through and nursed until he was a year. He was never (after the first 3 weeks) exclusively breastfed-- he always got 1-2 bottles of formula a day, but that was the best I could do. If you do offer formula (and I don't think it is a big deal after all--this is what it is there for), nurse first, then pump, and feed the breast milk first and then the formula. The MOST IMPORTANT thing is that the baby is getting what she need to grow and thrive. How it gets there is much less important. Remember this is about her-- not you, and what she needs, not what you want it to look like. You need a lot of help for the next several weeks until things calm down. Remember (and it's so hard) that this newborn adjustment period doesn't go on very long. You guys will be fine! Call a LC! And your mom! (or whomever can come help)

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L.B.

answers from Philadelphia on

Hi J.,
I'm not sure if this is the answer you want, but I had a similar problem. I have a now 5 month old son and a 3 year old. I felt like I did not have time for my toddler because I was always breastfeeding. I was starting to get very emotional about it. I wanted the benifits of breastfeeding but did not want to neglect my 3 year old to do it. I rented a breast pump and started pumping. My baby was bottle fed but with breast milk. It worked well for us. My 3 year old started to help feeding. It has brought them closer together.

As for the milk supply, I was able to tell exactly how much he was taking because I was pumping. I pumped more often to increase my supply and waited a little longer inbetween to decrease the supply. I hope this helps you.
L.

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A.H.

answers from Minneapolis on

At two weeks old, I was terrified to offer anything other than the breast. With my first child, I was only able to nurse for approx. 6 weeks (I developed mestatitis, unsupportive family, cracked/bleeding nipples). However, with the second, (my 3 children are roughly 2 years apart each) I made it clear to everyone that my intention was to nurse. This was important to me, and I would appreciate their support. However, if they didn't want to support me then I would prefer they keep their comments to themselves.
Now, you don't share how long you are feeding, how often. Is your newborn actively nursing the entire time, or is she falling asleep then waking back up and nursing a little here and there? Is she latching on properly? Are you stressed while trying to nurse? These questions would all steer my responses to you. However, without the answers, I can only offer that you need to keep nursing. As long as you aren't having any issues, do what is important to you! I would assume that you have been to the doctor and there isn't concern with lack of weight gain? I also assume that your daughter is having wet diapers? If your baby reduces the number of wet diapers produced daily, or isn't gaining wet, then you may need to re-evaluate.
As for your older child, I would save a video of his/her favorite show and put it on while you are nursing the baby. Have a coloring box full of crayons, paper, coloring books handy. I also LOVED the suggestion of having your other child get a book or two, and you read while you nurse. Also, make sure that you already have a drink and snack on hand for your other child in case they decide they are hungry or thirsty.
I nursed my 2nd child for 11 months until he weaned himself. My 3rd child nursed for 13 months, then I weaned her. For me nursing was one of the best times with my child! I loved the bonding between mom/child. But I also did various things with the other children while/between nursing to make sure they knew how much they were loved too.
I wish you the best of luck, and remember that some of your friends/family although they mean well with their advice, may feel that your strong desire to nurse is telling them that what they did with their child(ren) wasn't good enough (even though you never meant that). Ignore those at the times they aren't being supportive. Give others ways to assist you if they want to help.
Good luck!

S.L.

answers from Washington DC on

I agree with the others that if you can do it, go for it. However, I want to throw out there that breastmilk can be pumped and put in a bottle, if needed. That worked for me for months with my first and second babies, when nursing the usual way did not work out for us. Its just that instead of the baby attached to you, it will be the pump attached to you.

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S.B.

answers from Philadelphia on

My first breastfed every 2 hours 24 hours a day for about the first 3 months. Then I added some solids to his diet and he started eating about every 4 hours around the clock. At about 6 months he started sleeping 6-8 hours at night before waking to eat and then going back to sleep. During the day it was still about every 4 hours.
My first was 18 months when my second was born. For me BF was easier with the second b/c my milk supply was MUCH more abundant. However, most of my extended family keep telling me my second ate sooo often. They thought he was eating too much or not getting enough. The problem, which they would not believe, was that when my first was born they only saw him for a few hours at a time once or twice a week. With my second I was much more active & we were out and about. We visited with family much more frequently and for longer periods. They got to see much more of our day. So they would see my second BF two or 3 times during a visit. With my first they were rarely around for more than 4 hours, so they would only ever see one feeding. Occassionally, two feedings.
As for things I did to include my oldest. Whenever I BF I would ask him to bring me a book. He would climb into my chair & I would read to him while I BF my second. It worked beautifully. He got to read a lot of books with me and he never missed out on attention.
Best of luck, try to remind yourself that nothing lasts forever & this will be over before you know it. Also, remind yourself that it is good & healthy for your older child to have some time to himself. Learning to play on his own is good & you should encourage that too. Some individual activities you could have him do while you BF: color pictures to show you when you are done, build a tower to show you, make play doh animals, make up a story to share with you when you are done, etc.

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S.O.

answers from Allentown on

Stick with it, sweetie, it is so hard though, I know. My doula was a huge emotional support for me when I was told to supplement with formula. If your baby isn't crying and fussy after nursing, she not still hungry. My milk supply seemed lower with #2, I had so much milk with my first. Make sure you're drinking plenty of water and look for "mothers milk" tea in the health food section of your local grocery store or at a health food store. Almonds help your milk supply as well. As for supplementing, I strongly suggest pumping in between feedings if you're worried about milk supply. You can supplement with your pumped milk. Don't forget they have a growth spurt around 3 weeks! It's exhausting, but good luck and you're doing the right thing by asking for support from other moms. Also... I would talk to my baby about the older sibling a lot so they didn't feel left out. Also, reading softly to the older sibling while nursing is nice, or just cuddling them both is sweet if you can figure out how to do that. Take care!

A.G.

answers from Pocatello on

Keep on Nursing! I always fed both my girls on demand. Yes at times it was hard and I felt like I was nursing all the time but remember that your baby is still really little and as she gets older she will go longer stretches between feedings. Don't give her a bottle if you only want to nurse because that will impact your milk supply. I'm sure your daughter is getting enough milk as long as she is having wet and pooping diapers and is gaining weight. My first daughter would nurse like every hour to hour and 1/2 some days which was hard but I just figured she was either growing and need to eat more or just wanted comfort and I was fine with that. With my second I just got really good at multi-tasking LOL I would putting a hot pocket in the microwave for my 2 year old for lunch as I was still nursing my other. So hang in there you can totally do it!

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J.M.

answers from Philadelphia on

Hello! Congratulations on being so dedicated to breastfeeding!
I also had a 4 year old and a newborn and nursed exclusively. It was difficult and demanding at first because of the time issues. Nursing time became story time for my 4 year old, so it became a win-win situation. She would also help the baby fall asleep (by being quiet) because baby's nap time was our special time to play together.

I found the La Leche League info line to be very helpful when I questions with nursing! I, too, didn't have the support a woman needs when she's as dedicated as you. You can find a local chapter or more info online. Best of luck to you!!!

K.C.

answers from Barnstable on

At two weeks, her belly is very tiny so she may in fact nurse every hour. Make sure she is latched on well - a poor latch means that she isn't drawing milk properly (note - this is often confused for too little milk, which is fairly uncommon physiologically).

Make sure you can see her tongue below your breast (you may need a partner to look for you) and jutting out slightly over her bottom lip when she is actively nursing. A child with a short frenulum (tongue tied) can end up nipple feeding rather than breastfeeding.The result can be a baby that seems hungry all the time, simply because they cannot stick their tongue out far enough to latch properly. This will eventually result in lower milk supplies. Of the women I have worked with as a peer breastfeeding mentor, I would say 30% that are having issues is a result of a tongue tied baby. I have NEVER had a mom come back after a pedi appointment and say that the Dr disagreed with me!

Tongue tie is easily fixable (about 60 second in the pedi's office) and the difference is night and day for mom and baby.

Also, if nursing is painful but only initially (like the first few sucks), the baby is not latching deeply enough initially. After a few sucks, they draw in the breast more and the pain subsides. It is important to correct this "shallow latching" before your nipples crack. Many moms, thinking it is normal, tough it out and end up cracked.

I am here is you need me!
:)

D.S.

answers from Allentown on

Hi, J.:

Call your local breast feeding consultant at La Leche League in your local area at:

www.llli.org

Hope this helps. D.

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P.C.

answers from Scranton on

Contact your local La Leche League leader. They will be able to give you the support you need.

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S.G.

answers from Saginaw on

I breastfed on demand.....the more I nursed the more milk I produced! If your worried about your supply then pump after your baby nurses for while just to give yourself an extra boost! If your still concerned ask your ped or obgyn for help....thats what they are there for and it took me awhile to figure that out! Good luck!

S.

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A.A.

answers from Philadelphia on

Hi, I see you have gotten lots of answers and I didn't read but a couple and so what I have to say may have already been said, and probably in a better way than I can. But I certainly do relate to your situation, I am currently nursing my third child and each of my children are spaced around 2 years or less apart, so I know how you feel pulled in multiple directions. Believe me, your older child will adjust and not be harmed by the time you are spending with your newborn. I actually think it is good, if you handle it right, to teach kids young that the world does not revolve around them. Encourage your older child to look at books, put on a PBS kids program if you need to (won't hurt anyone, and if it distracts and educates, that's great), or give a snack at that time. The nursing around the clock business only lasts a couple of months in my experience. I agree it does seem quite overwhelming at times. I remember feeling also that I didn't think my supply was adequate. Give some back up formula if it makes you feel better, but pump afterwards so that your supply is built up. I am actually an advocate of pumping and nursing in the beginning anyway, just to build up a supply faster. Not to mention you can see how much the baby is getting, which is reassuring if you are nervous. Don't fret too much about nipple confusion--I've never experienced it and all three of my babies had bottles early on and nursed just fine. Please whatever you do, see a lactation consultant for support. It is the best thing I did! If you would like a referral to an excellent one, I can send you a personal message. Good luck and always remember that it doesn't last long!

A.J.

answers from Williamsport on

Relax, your first child is absolutely fine! Sharing is part of life and it's good when the second baby comes and disperses things. You won't be spending this much time nursing forever. You're doing fine. My second two babies were very difficult to nurse compared to the first. I think you're right not to supplement this early, it very well may make your milk taper off. If she's trying to nurse constantly, she's hungry, and your milk WILL catch up. She's not forming a habit this young. She will get satisfied once your milk fills out. Drink TONS of water, it's the most important thing for milk supply. And nurse nurse nurse, or, if you're worried about the pacifier thing, pump pump pump and give her some bottles in between nursing. Bottles saved my life and enabled me to nurse much longer since I could take bottles with me, let dad feed the kids, etc. Just be sure not to slack off on the demand -pump when you're not nursing for a good 20 minutes or more very hour or two- because she needs more milk. Good luck-you can do it, this will pass in a couple more weeks. Maybe less.

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H.W.

answers from Atlanta on

When I had my second daughter, I had a 2 year old at home who needed a LOT of my time! She still took a nap, and went to bed early, so the nursing schedule could work around that to a degree. During the times that she was awake, I would find that when I sat down to nurse that would be the time she would pick to "disappear" and find the most destructive thing possible to do while I was occupied. What I ended up doing, was every time I sat down to nurse, I would sit her on the couch with me and let her do a puzzle or "read" books, or play with something that I only got out during those times so she remained interested. It took a lot of stress off me because I knew she was safe, and was occupied. An almost four year old should be old enough to understand, "Mommy is going to feed the baby; I need you to sit down and play with blocks for a few minutes and then we can get a snack." Or work on a puzzle together or whatever you think it is that she would enjoy. He should be old enough to understand how to "wait". That will be good practice for school! Also, taking Fenugreek (a lactation consultant can advise) at about 3 times the amount recommended helped my supply tons. Wouldn't supplement with formula.

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S.B.

answers from Redding on

Your baby is only 2 weeks old. Nurse her has much as you can, as much as she'll have you. Now is not the time for worrying that she will be too attached. The first several weeks are so important for bonding, comfort and nutrition for your baby.
My first baby was really little and I was afraid she wasn't getting enough to eat so I supplemented with formula and she wouldn't have anything to do with me after that. She was 4 months old and just done nursing.
Also, never feel like breastfeeding is neglecting your first child. Just never do that to yourself. Your son was breast fed and had the benefits of it and now it's his little sister's turn. He's 4. He can sit by you on the couch while you nurse or read with you or put together a puzzle. Or, just gently cuddle. Your 4 year old can have his needs met in other ways, you newborn is helpless. It doesn't have to be about "dividing" time either. This is your family. There is a new baby in it. You will all adjust.
The more you approach this as a matter of being the most natural thing in the world, and you relax a little, the easier it will be for things to fall into place.
Congratulations on your baby and don't worry about certain things just yet. 2 weeks is brand spanking new.

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S.O.

answers from Oklahoma City on

I am so sorry you are not getting the support from your family. If she seems like she's still hungry than just nurse her and your milk supply will grow. You are only two weeks in, and just getting the hang of things. You will keep up and as long as you nurse, nurse, nurse.

I would just continue to nurse her as often as you can without supplementing. If she's getting food from somewhere else and not demanding it from you then it won't build up your supply.

If you're concerned about her growth (like I was with my son, my first and only) then take her to the doctor for a weight check. Or, the hospital I delivered at offered breastfeeding support classes where you could ask questions and they even had a scale. Once I weighed my son and saw he was gaining, I immediately felt better.

Hang in there and keep up the great work! Tell your family you are dedicated to breastfeeding and would appreciate no talk of formula feeding. Also a little encouragement would be nice in this time of uncertainty. Good luck!

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I.G.

answers from Seattle on

I didn't read all the answers, but I did want to give you some reassurance. When my daughter was just about 2 weeks old (and later at 4 and 6 weeks) she went through bursts of non-stop nursing. I was exhausted and crying, believing that I didn't have enough milk... I called my sister who was nursing her 4th child at the same time in tears and she reassured me that these insatiable phases are completely normal! She is preparing to grow and by giving you a few days of increased stimulation, your milk supply will increase.
I too would have been devastated if I wasn't able to breastfeed, so I would suggest no longer talking to the naysayers, until you feel more comfortable. If took me a month to establish a good nursing relationship, but about 3 months until I was finally completely confident that I was able to provide her everything she needed.

As for your 4 year old, I think you just have to acknowledge to yourself that it will be a few weeks, until you can "evenly divide" your time. Rely on family and friends to help you, if you can. Whenever my sister had a new baby (except for her last one, when we were living too far apart), our family would jump in to take her older children off her hands as much as possible. We did fun things and gave them lots of attention, while she got a few hours to herself with her newborn. If no one offers,ask for help!
You are not neglecting your firstborn if you do this!

Good luck!

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J.F.

answers from Philadelphia on

You have gotten some great advice here J.! Congratulations on your dedication to giving your child the best nutrition possible - this is not only wonderful but crucial to her health and with amazing benefits to your health. But you already know this! :-) Formula is like McDonalds - for 100% of an infant's nutritional needs, not the best choice (when you DO have a choice....and you DO - YOU, like 95% of woman, have the opportunity to provide liquid gold to her for 100% of her nutritional needs). All of your instincts here are PHENOMENAL! (avoiding listening to others who may encourage giving formula, feeding on demand, feeding often to build supply, using nursing time to read to your preschooler, etc). We unfortunately may have many opportunities to second guess our parental decisions as our children grow up, so stick with your gut here and you won't need to start second guessing your decisions now :-)

If you feel that your daughter truly isn't satisfied for periods of time that are appropriate for her age/development ... (like your instinct and like everyone said here, it is not only normal but important for a 2 week old to be feeding every 2 hours - their stomachs are not even the size of a ping pong ball yet!) ... perhaps she is not latched on correctly? That would likely feel uncomfortable or painful to you though as another indicator..... if so, you might want to seek support for that.....

Or perhaps you have a ABUNDANT supply and this is actually causing her to become very full quickly and perhaps so full so quickly that she is uncomfortable and being fussy after feedings? If she is feeding quickly (5 - 10 min feedings?) and fussy after/perhaps very alert after ... perhaps you have an abundant supply and might want to seek support for managing that....

For support, you have 3 great options:
- contact local la leche league or nursing mothers advisory council (see below)
- contact local hospital "warm line" (see below)
- contact lactation consultant to come to your home (see below)

Your profile says you are in Havertown - you have a La Leche League that looks quite active:

http://www.lllusa.org/web/DelCoMainLinePA.html

Call them! They can offer you specific support to your specific questions!

Or the Nursing Mothers Advisory Council has trained counselors (who are nursing mothers themselves) available for phone consultation: http://nursingmoms.net/local-chapters/

Or....the hospital you delivered at likely has a breastfeeding support "warm line" .... a phone number you can call anytime of day, perhaps leave a message, but receive a quick call back from a lactation consultant on staff. If you don't know about whether the hospital you delivered in has one, you could try Pennsylvania Hospital in Center City - they have a GREAT one and I am sure they don't require you to have delivered there before they answer your questions over the phone. Here is the number: ###-###-####.

Or...you can contact a board-certified Lactation Consultant to come to your home. Often insurance covers this. If not, I find that most IBCLCs are in the $80 - 100/hour range? I have heard great things about the first two (Lisa Mandell & Linda Derbyshire) that come up in the list when using "Haverford, PA" as the map search term with this "Find a Lactation Consultant" site: http://www.ilca.org/i4a/pages/index.cfm?pageid=3432

Good luck!

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