Book Suggestions?

This is more of a book about sibling rivalry, but its called "You're All my Favorites," by Sam McBratney. It talks about how a mother and father love all of their children, regardless of who was born first, last, boy, girl, etc. My kids really like it.

Hi Sherry,

My oldest loved "The New Baby" by Mercer Mayer when we were getting ready for my second baby. I'm due with my third in 5 weeks, so we've been doing the same kinds of things--talking about the baby, talking to and singing to the baby, watching him squirm in my belly, taking care of dolls, and they have had a blast helping me get ready for the baby (sorting through clothes, cleaning the carseat and bassinet, helping to think of names, etc), so they feel like it's their baby too. Good luck--this is an awesome time of life.

This is a really long list - some may be above your son's level, but many of them have his age in mind. Good for you for taking the time to prepare your son. It'll make the adjustment much easier for him!

When the New Baby Comes, I'm Moving Out by Martha Alexander
Welcome, Little Baby by Aliki
Let Me Tell You About My Baby by Roslyn Banish
The Berenstain Bears' New Baby by Jan & Stanley Berenstain
Arthur's Baby by Marc Brown
Babar's Little Girl by Laurent deBrunhoff
My Mom's Having a Baby! by Dori Hillestad Butler
Dancing by Denys Cazet
Everett Anderson's Nine Month Long by Lucille Clifton
The New Baby at your House by Joanna Cole
Waiting for Baby Joe by Pat Collins
Will There Be a Lap for Me? by Dorothy Corey
Darcy and Gran Don't Like Babies by Jane Cutler
We Have a Baby by Cathryn Falwell
Ben's Baby by Michael Foreman
Waiting for Jennifer by Kathryn Galbraith
Katie Did! by Kathryn Galbraith
Roommates by Kathryn Galbraith
Where Did That Baby Come From? by Debi Gliori
She Come Bringing Me That Little Baby Girl by Eloise Greenfield
Julius the Baby of the World by Kevin Henkes
Spot's Baby Sister by Eric Hill
I Need You, Dear Dragon by Margaret Hillert
Peter's Chair by Ezra Jack Keats
Making Room by Phoebe Koehler
Whose Mouse Are You? by Robert Kraus
Don't Touch My Room by Pat Lakin
Love That Baby by Kathryn Lasky
New Baby by Emily A McCully
Good Girl, Gracie Growler! by Hilda Offen
Waiting for Hannah by Marisabina Russo
How I Named the Baby by Linda Shute
My Mama Needs Me by Mildred Walter
Getting Ready for New Baby by Harriet Ziefert

I'm sure you'll receive many book recommendations so I'll skip to a few pieces of advice. Talk to your son as you light a candle telling him the flame is kind of like how much you love him. Linger on that for a while and call attention to its size before lighting another candle off the first. Now you have two flames, but show him that the first one didn't get smaller for the presence of the second. That's how love is -- it gets bigger.

Another thing that worked well for me is telling the older child that this new baby is his, that he (the first) was your baby, but this one is his. I found the older child took on a greater interest in the care and well-being of the squalling baby when there was ownership involved. "It's time to change your baby's diaper; want to help?"

Forestall jealousy: "We need to feed your baby, now. I don't really want to -- I'd rather spend time playing with you, but I suppose we have to. Do you want to go get a book for us to read while your baby drinks?"

My oldest was only 19 months old when the second arrived and 3.5 at the arrival of the third. He seemed so big by comparison that I surely expected more of him than if it'd just been him. In the throes of the certain fatigue to come, try to do your best to remember that he's still just a baby himself.

When exhausted, chant to yourself, "It's only a stage. It WILL pass."

Good luck.

C.

Hi S.,

Here are a few books that I have and enjoyed reading to my kids. I have a 7yr old son, 5yr old son and a 3yr old daughter.

I'm a Big Brother-by Joanna Cole
The Berenstain Bears' New Baby-by Stan & Jan Berenstain
On Mother's Lap-by Ann Herbert Scott

Here's a few books that aren't necessarily about having a sibling but just reassuring him that you will always love him.

Me and my Family Tree-by Joan Sweeney
Love you Forever by Robert Munsch
I Love You When... by John Edward Hasse

Just make sure he is a part of the pregnancy and when the baby is born let him Hold the baby with assistance of course and make him feel like he is needed to help fetch diapers, wipes, let him help bathe, my kids loved to give their siblings a bath in the kitchen sink.

Best Wishes---J. C

sorry i have no suggestions about books i thought i needed 1 I understand ur concern i just had a baby he is 3 weeks and i have a 16 month old and a 3 yr old my 16 month old is surprisingly well with the baby its my 3 yr old who wants to play mom good luck

We really liked "I'm a Big Brother" by Joanna Cole and Maxie Chambliss. You can look at it (and buy it cheap) on Amazon.com.
It talks a little about the realities of having a new baby (ie. they don't do much, they cry, they can't eat big people food), and talks about how the big brother is special in another way too now.
Our oldest son was 2 when we were reading it, and he was able to understand it well. Our middle son was 19 months when #3 was born, and I don't know how well "prepared" they can be at that stage, but it's always good to try. (Luckily when they're that young they're very adaptable!)

My mother-in-law found the greatest book for my daughter when we were expecting our twins.

I Wish I Were the Baby

I don't know who wrote it, but it's words were written as a rhyme. The story is from the child's point-of-view and he has a dream that he actually is the baby. He can't play with big-boy toys or eat cereal. He learns that being the "big boy" is a good place to be.

One of the best things to do is to talk to your son often about the new arrival. You have several months to prepare him to be the big brother! Tell him it's HIS baby (brother or sister), not always in terms of your baby. If he feels like it is HIS baby, then he won't be jealous and do things for attention. Let him know he GETS to be a big brother and GETS to teach the new baby how to do everything (walk, talk, feed himself, play, etc), that way he takes responsibility, has ownership, and wants to help.

Usborne Books has great books for children. Their website is
UBAH.COM/2151

These are pretty basic - I've read them to my 21 month old, so they probably won't be TOO far above your son.
A Baby for Davy - Brigitte Weninger
There's a House Inside my Mommy - Giles Andreae
I got them both at the local library, but I think amazon.com has them both too (definitely the second one).

I have an 11 year old daughter and I really liked the Berenstain Bears books. There is one specifically about a new baby in the house. I had a large collection of them because they all had a lesson to learn, like keeping your room clean and talking to strangers, etc.

S.,
Sorry I don't know of any book but I'm sure others on this site will have suggestions. I do, however, have great ideas for preparing siblings for arrival. My four children absolutely LOVE each other. Even my oldest (9) wrote a paper in second grade about how his little brother (7) is his 'Best Friend'. They even tell me that they love each other. I was only going to have 3 but after I had my third (daughter age 3), I just knew she needed a buddy too so then I had another (boy 1). Anyway, I talked about the baby as late in the pregnancy as I could because he was too young to understand early on. (Talking about my first son) But eventually, we had to prepare the 'baby room'. We got my him involved in everything we could. When we painted the room, we pained everything except a 12 inch circle which we asked my son to fill in. We took many pictures of him "Painting His New Little Brother's Room!" We also went shopping for him to pick out a gift for his new baby brother, 'from him'. So when they met for the first time at the hospital they would exchange gifts. When he first saw the baby, the baby was in the cart (not in my arms). This gave me the chance to hug and hold my visiting son. When he gave his gift (so proudly) to the baby. He discovered that the baby had a gift for him!!! So their first experience was giving to each other. I made many efforts as they were growing up to get them to treat each other well. When they didn't act 'kindly', they had to 'say sorry to their eyes'. So they had to actually say sorry looking at their others' eyes. My 3 yr old daughter is learning that now. If the kids fight over a toy, the toy goes into "time-out". When they got a little older, like 5 & 7, things were settled with 'Rock, Paper, Scissors'. Sometimes in waiting rooms we play that for fun. I encourage them to think about the other whenever I can. As a matter of fact, my oldest earned a prize in "speech" at school and picked two small candies instead of one big one so he could bring one home for his brother. Stuff like that just warms my heart. Of course they say their prayers together every night - I'm sure that helps too. Oh, and when I had just the two boys, I put them together in the same room (at 1½ & 3½) and made the other room a playroom so they could learn to tolerate and share together. They are still in the same room but now in bunkbeds. I hoped I helped some. I love that magazine you get from the doctor called "As Your Baby Grows" and it shows all the pictures of the different stages. My kids really loved to look at that and see what stage the baby was at. Having them that close in age is a little hard at first but they will have a Lifetime of Friendsip. Good Luck to you!

I am a big fan of Mercer Mayer Little Critter books. There are dozens of them, I believe one is called "Me and My Sister", but there are a few that include big brother issues.

Natural Hospital Birth!
http://www.amazon.com/Natural-Hospital-Birth-Best-Worlds/...

Barns and noble has a large selection also Toys r us that are age approiate

My son was a bit older, he was 25 months when I was pregnant with my second child. Don't have any book suggestions - best is probably a book where you can fold the tummy open and there it is: a baby.
But what really worked well for us was a baby doll that we got for him and told him that this is HIS baby and that the one in my tummy looked just like that. He took the doll in his bath, in his bed, to the daycare, he dressed it, undressed it, put on a jacket when we went outside. We gave him the doll when my tummy got really visible, probably in week 27 or so. Worked really well.

I don't have any suggestions. I am going to be looking for books like that too. I have a 14 month old son and expecting in October also. Could you pass the information along to me that you receive? I would appreciate it.

When we were expecting my son, my daughter's pediatrician suggested a few books. One that we found is called "I'm a Big Sister". She really understood that even though the babies are only 20 months apart. There is also the one (and forgive me that in this moment I cannot remember) with the little creature. He looks like a porcupine to me, but I am not sure what he is supposed to be. He is pretty popular and if you ask about it at the book store they are bound to be more helpful than me. Anyway, it is called "the new baby" or something similar. It is gender nuetral. The books really helped my daughter.
CONGRATS on your new baby!

My book suggestions would be "The New Baby" by Mercer Mayer, or "Vera's Baby Sister" by Vera Rosenberry... Also, this is what we did... We got a doll and started treating it like it were real (to a degree :). We held it and talked about what babies need, feeding, changing, etc. and were always careful with the "baby". We showed how to hold a baby. If the doll got dropped, we talked about how it could hurt baby and we hugged it and encouraged our little one to help take care of the "baby". It helped because while the real baby made noise and took Mom's time, it wasn't as big of a shock.

I have four kids and this worked with them. And yes I do have boys that I did this with, they still like their trucks and "boy stuff." The other suggestions I have are to always let the little ones help as much as they can..bring diapers, hold bottles, give pacifiers, etc. Talk to him as you go through your pregnancy about being a big brother...We even did our birth announcements as from the sibling and the parents (sibling first) "Joey and his parents would like to announce the birth of..." or "Joey would like for everyone to know his new baby sister has arrived..." This makes it special for them and helps to keep them from having as many jealousy issues.