My 4 month old used to be a good napper (1-2 hours at a time, in her bassinet in my room), and a good night sleeper (1 wakening for feeding at 1am). Then she got sick 3 weeks ago, we had an out of town overnight stay, she grew too big for her bassinet so I've moved her to her big crib in her own room, and now she's cutting her first tooth. Oh, and she's very gassy - I'm convinced that she toots herself awake as well.
And now with all of that, she's no longer sleeping well. She naps for less than 30 minutes, and wakes 3 or 4 times at night crying, soothed by nursing. I've resorted to sleeping in the guest bed with her in her room to nurse her since it's so frequent now.
I know that too many things have changed all at once, but I don't see how to un-do any of the changes. So, how do I move forward and help my little one get better sleep? She's too young to sleep train, based on anything I've read, but this is ridiculous!
She isn't too young to sleep train. I started about about 3 weeks with both of mine.
Anyway, my 6 month old is having horrible teething issues. I forgot to give her Tylenol once last week, and she woke up at 3 in so much pain. I could only soothe her by nursing, but she did go back down with Tylenol and the nursing. Try Tylenol before bed and see if that takes the edge off enough to prevent waking.
She is going through a growth spurt and teething....Her illness threw her schedule off...it will take time to get her back on track...Make sure she doesn't have a ear infection if the sleeping doesn't get any better. You don't have to have a fever to have one. I noticed with my kids once they started teething they'd have ear infections...don't know why maybe because of the drainage...Also, is she on solids yet meaning cereal? If not, have you given her enough formula/breast milk?
I agree with the mom that sleep training is not the answer. When my husband would want them to cry it out.....I just said if your three year old is crying at night, you don't ignore him.....Why ignore a baby that can't communicate with you what is happening with them.
As far as the teething.....try Hyland's teething gel and teething tablets. They are homeopathic and not drugs and they work wonders.
I slept with my babies.while I was still nursing.....they slept better and I definitely got more sleep. They are little for such a short time and before you know it, they won't need you in their little bed.
infants and sleep are never a constant. it changes from daily to periodically.. likely this pattern wont stay forever either.
you dont sleep train anyone. you nurture. you love. you respond. babies dont have the tools to "learn" from desertion.
she might be scared in her own room. she might miss you. she might have some teething pain. she might just be gassy. she might be on the verge of a growth spurt or developmental milestone. if shes nursing frequently, it sounds like a growth spurt is coming on. nursing frequently, day AND night, is the best idea. i know you are tired, i know you dont want to sleep in the guest room, but it will help your milk supply increase properly, and it will help your daughter grow in size and confidence that you are there for her when she needs something. and to an infant under 1 year, everything is a need. they dont know how to manipulate you yet! shes not doing it on purpose, she doesnt realize that its disturbing your sleep.
i think you are doing the right thing. my son self weaned at 20 months, and he nursed at least once at night until he was between 15-17 months. he slept with us, or with me if he made it until my husband went to work, long after that (still does sometimes!) his crib was in our room until he was almost 3.
and theres nothing wrong with this!! he is an AWESOME sleeper, always has been (except he did this too, he would nurse sometimes all night long! and it IS exhausting!) but he is a confident, excellent sleeper because i never felt the need to leave him alone and deserted in his crib in another room. i felt the need to fulfill his needs, whenever and whatever they were. and it worked like a charm!
i can put it this way: if "the world" tells you to ignore him, let him cry, "train" him, etc etc etc, and the majority of kids in "the world" are a bit messed up, than obviously the system isnt working!!! its simply deduction and logic. if a majority of parents do X and a majority of kids turn out Y, then X causes Y.
just KEEP DOING WHAT YOU ARE DOING. i promise you, you are getting more sleep than parents who ignore their babies, and its better sleep because you are constantly reaffirming your instincts with your child, instead of feeling guilty, sad, aweful, torn, and heartbroken. after a while, parents start feeling as if they are "fine" and it "doesnt effect them anymore" when their babies cry. think about that for a minute. it doesnt effect them to hear their babies cry!!! does that not just sound like the most aweful thing you could say about your child?
just use your instincts. you are being a fantastic mom. im sure your husband (boyfriend, what have you) misses you, or wants you in bed with him, discuss having baby there too (with extreme caution and sensibility - no heavy blankets, caution with pillows, etc. even separate blankets can help). OR simply making sure that his needs in your relationship are fulfilled by having private time at LEAST 1-2 times a week (this was VERY important to my husband, and we totally made it work!). then the only thing you have to worry about is the opinion of people outside your home, and they shouldnt matter one bit. you take care of your family. :) do what YOU feel is best. dont do what anyone else says. this is YOUR child! only you have been specifically given instincts for your specific child. only you know what to do! :) follow your heart, your instincts, and never give up on that! trust me, when your kid is 2, and you can instinctivly tell that shes throwing a fit because shes _____, you will thank yourself for listening to all her needs all along. :) instinct grows only by listening to it and following it.
anyway, keep it up like i said. :) she will flop into a new routine shortly, and it will be something else thats keeping her up. ;) when they learn something new, like turning over, crawling, standing up, etc, they always have sleep interruptions.
if you think its teething, try some of that hylands teething stuff. its awesome! :) mylecon drops for the tummy ache. :)
With the change in the weather, are you sure she's not too cold or too warm? We've had that problem before and it took me FOREVER to figure it out.
Check out some of these sleeping tips that might help you come up with ideas to create a better sleeping environment for your LO:
http://www.theskinnyscoop.com/search/sleep?utm_campaign=t...
My son did exactly what you're describing every time he was about to cross a major milestone. (rolling over, crawling, etc...)
After he mastered the skill, he would go back to sleeping as normal.
Just be careful that YOU are not the one that creates habits for him. We learned the hard way that we were doing that to our little guy. And then, of course, you have to break the habit...
If you want him in his crib, do not take him into bed with you at any cost, etc...
Your 4 month old is going through a lot right now so please give it some time and see how she does. It could be a growth spurt, separation anxiety, pain or just too overwhelmed by all the learning and doing. Sleep training is not the answer in this situation - I don't believe in sleep training because kids feel the need to be secure and know that if they are in distress someone would come and take care of them, especially in infancy.
You could try Infant Ibuprofen for the pain and inflammation and maybe use Baby Orajel for instant relief for teething. My son loves the teethers that can be frozen, the cold help numb the gums and gives them some relief.
You don't need to undo these - it will go away as quickly as it started and this too shall pass. All the Best!
