4 Month Old Will Not Nap

I Q.. The cereal thing didn't really work for either of my kids. 4 months is so young to start solids and it doesn't really help them sleep. it's more of a habit thing that hunger. I've always had problems with my youngest son with sleeping. he's done ok with naps until now. he's 13 months. But just try getting him good and sleepy, but don't wait until he's crying because he's so tired. Then lay him in his bed still slightly awake so he learns to go asleep on his own. I let my kids cry for 10-20 minutes at a time and would go in there hold him for a minute until he calms down, then put him down again. Babywise was a miracle book for my first son. I wasn't as strict as the book suggested, but the whole structred day plan was perfect for both my kids! Hope this helps. You're not the only one out there!

Try a bath before feeding ,this can make him sleepy. If this does not work then try to putting on music to put him to sleep. Sometimes if it's to quiet he can be light sleeper.This means any noise or movement will wake him.

Its tuff when they dont nap. I have twins & i had that problem for the first 7 months. They are now 9 months & getting a little bit better. Try rocking him & singing to him. I used to do that & it took a while but they finally started to doze off & sleep. Dont give up, it definatley takes time. Good luck

I started feeding both my kids solids at four months: rice cereal, oatmeal banana mush, barley cereal. That really helped. People tend to say start at 6 months with solids, my kids were hungry, and they've turned out just fine.

Q.,
I am a first-time mom too and also been having the same problem. My son sleeps great at night(except when has had bad gas) but is not a great napper. I work full-time & when he is with me all day on weekends I have to go on a car ride for him to take a 2 hr nap. He will not settle down at home. I feel like a bad mom that I cannot get my kid to nap. So I now how you feel. We also go next Monday for his 4mnth ckup and I hope to ask his ped about feeding cereal and/or solids too. I am hoping that this will help him nap/sleep better at night. I do not have any helpful suggestions, but I wanted to let you know that you are not alone. Since I have been reading Mamasource it has made me feel so much better that I am not alone. It can be confusing sometimes with all the information you get, but you know your child best and what works for you. I will let you know what my dr says and I hope that can help you also. Good Luck!!
B.

some babies just don't nap like others. i have 4 kids, the oldest slept a lot as a baby, the youngest never did. a 10 minute nap once or maybe twice a day was all he ever took. he did sleep thru the nite younger than any of the others did, but it was all i could do to get a shower during his 10 minute nap. make sure he gets lots of tummy time on the floor, put toys just out of his reach so he stretches for them. i know it doesn't seem like much, but that's a baby's way to exercise, and that can help to make him tired. once he starts to crawl, make sure he gets lots of time to do that for the same reason. btw, my youngest is now 13, and still doesn't get a lot of sleep. he can go to bed at 10, but lay in bed until 12 or later. but he still sleeps more when he's had lots of exercise (like during football season). good luck!

My first son never napped until I bought him a swing. I felt like a terrible Mom, he would spend the majority of his time in the swing, that is where he napped and slept sometimes at night. I don't think cereal will help.. Try nursing him and then putting him straight into the swing.. It might work, it did for us. I feel your pain... Infants are SO hard.. hang in there.

J.

Ok I am not a fan of Ferber but to each his own. I did find that putting my DD in a sling and wearing her around the house gave her the comfort she needed and I was able to get things done around the house.
I really found Dr. Sears to be very helpful but his methods are not for everyone. Now my daughter is 16 months, she sleeps well, naps well, plays on her own, eats well and is a happy child. We loved our sling. When she would drift off I could often just move her to her crib or swing. We did co sleep quite a bit because it was just easier for me nursing at night.

If you are not comfortable with the cry it out method (and there is a reason for that, we are chemically designed to respond to our babies cry) then don't do it. A baby is not manipulative, they cannot be spoiled. A baby who knows someone who cares is always there learns confidence to explore and be strong. Good luck.

Hi Q.,

My husband bought my son a wonderful device for Christmas that helped so much- we use it during the day too when he naps! It is a soundspa with a projector http://www.gnc.com/product/index.jsp?productId=2856892
we got ours at JC Penny for 29.95. We have a routine with him. He has a leap frog that plays soothing music for 6 minutes- and we turn the sound spa on "ocean". (every time we lay him down we do this) He is 8 months now and we plan on continuing this routine. Sometimes he cries for a little bit- but most of the time it is only for a few minutes- I know it is hard but it really is for the best in my opinion. I plan on giving it as a shower gift from now on. It has really helped our little guy- and hope it helps yours too!

My son is 2 years and he was (almost) always a great sleeper/eater from the time we brought him home from the hospital. By the time he was 6 months, he would fall asleep in his crib on his own (no rocking, nursing him to sleep). Babies need to learn self soothing methods so you aren't struggling every nap and bed time for months (or years) to come. Those times should be something for you to look forward to.
Anyway, I give credit for my son's wonderful sleeping habits mostly to 2 books. "The Baby Whisperer" by Tracy Hogg & Melinda Blau and "Baby Wise" by Gary Ezzo. Of the 2, I recommend the 1st highly and "Baby Wise" advice to be taken much more lightly but the 2 teach a similar concept for babies schedules in general. My approach with the books was to take some advice that I thought good for my baby's & my personality and disregard the advice I disagreed with.
I also don't suggest the rice cereal because I've heard stories of constipation and other issues. Your main goal should be to help your baby to be a self-sufficient sleeper by providing him with a general sleep/eat/play schedule. Both your lives will greatly benefit not only now but in the next few years to come.
Please contact me if you'd like to talk about this any more! Good luck!

That was my suggestion. My parents and grandparents always told me to get their tummys full by putting cereal in their milk. Try that, it should work. Feed him, get him full, lay him down with some nice soothing music. That should do the trick. It'll work anytime, not only at night. If I get full during the day, I'm gonna wanna take a nap, so it's just not for nighttime.

I hate to say it, but my daughter went through this when she was about that age too. She always slept great at night, but naps were a whole different story. The only thing that finally worked was to let her cry it out. I know that isn't what you want to hear, but you may have to let him cry for a bit longer than 10 minutes. You can check on him in 5-10 minute intervals just so that he knows you're still there, but don't pick him up. Just pat him to soothe him and then let him be. I actually had to stop going in to check on my daughter because she would get more upset every time I left, but try it and see what works for you. Now that she is 2 1/2, those times are a distant memory, so as hard as it seems now, believe me, it gets better! Now she's a great sleeper and we have no issues whatsoever. I'm about to have to do this all over again with my son who is 3 1/2 weeks old, so I'm right there with you. Best of luck to you!

Hi Q.,
I cannot recommend enough a book called Healthy Sleep Habits, Happy Child by Marc Weissbluth MD. Marc is a physician who runs a sleep lab in California who has seen thousands of patients in his lab, and developed a model of how people fall asleep and what cues they give off when they first get tired. He writes on how to recognize these cues in your baby, so you can put them down for a nap as soon as they need one. He also talks about the detriments of not getting enough sleep, i.e. how a chronically tired baby / child is an uncomfortable child. What is particularly helpful, too, is his recommendations for how much sleep your child needs, from birth through age 12; he divides his chapters into age groups so if your child is...3 months old, you go to that chapter to see how much time they should be awake, so you know when your child will start to show these signs of being ready for a nap. This book was recommended to me by a physician - friend when my children were 2.5 yrs and 9 months old; I put them on the sleeping schedule and saw an rapid change in their ability to nap and a decrease in their crankiness.
The first day I tried the program, it was difficult because at the afternoon nap time, my 9 month old daughter cried for 45 minutes. I lay on the floor outside her room, literally tossing around, feeling like the worst mom on the planet. She finally fell asleep. The second day, though, she cried for 20 minutes, I thought, this is an improvement. And on the third day she didn't cry at all. From that day on she went down for a nap without crying! I was a believer at that point.
When I had my third child, I put her on the sleeping schedule on day 1. And she was sleeping completely through the night on day 7 - and she was on a diet of only breastmilk! I was quite amazed.
Good luck and let me know how it goes. You can find this book at amazon.com or Barnes & Nobles, etc.

Well quin you may want to first concider how many hours a night your baby is sleeping and possibly decrease those
We had a simular problem and what we did was on one of my off days I kept him awake preventing him from taking those 5-10 min naps it will take about a weekend but it worked for my son and after that we had no problems with naps anymore but you do have to be consistant

Q.,
does he sleep all nite?? 10minutes of letting him cry it out is not enough time either if you think hes still hungrey you only add 1 new thingto his diet ever 10 days begin with rice,bananas,
apples he will eat it off a baby spoon just give him very small bites at first and vert thin he doe'nt know what it is try that i'm old school i feed my ceral at by 1st month they slept all nite
L.

We have a little rocking chair for babys that converts into a rocking chair for todlers about 3 or 4 yrs old. We buckle him in and rock him to sleep. He usually crys for about ten mins. then falls asleep if he dosent fall asleep we figure out what else he is needing. Burp, diaper change, food, play time or just to be held. I would contact the doctor about this espically if he is crying all the time. Once he has fallen asleep there is a bar on the bottom that secures him so he wont rock anymore. Best of luck. I am not a fan of the cry it out method my son sometimes wimpers but no real tears when he is tired and trying to fall asleep. I think if they are crying its the only way they can tell you something is wrong. Hope this helps. I would recomend NOT feeding him cereral till the doctor gives his ok. even still I feed our son in the morning his cereral. My husband tryed to seek cereral in his bottle a few times thinking it would help but it only pissed of our son.

Have you tried wrapping him up snuggly in a blanket? I could never quite master it but knew some one who could and she could always get my firstborn to take a nap. So if you know someone with that skill, especially a materinty ward nurse, ask them to teach you.

Hope that helps!
K.

I would like to give you one suggestion when you do get your baby on cereal. By all means do not put the cereal in their bottle give only by spoon. My ped, gave this adivse when my son was the same age and he said that it will be harder to get them used to getting food from a spoon. They will associate getting full from sucking on a bottle. I hope this tip will work for you and best of luck with your son getting some rest during the day!

Try the book "Healthy Sleep Habits, Happy Child". This book is all about sleep and correcting sleep problems. Although I have not had your specific problem, I have had others that this book has helped me solve. Best of Luck.

I don't think the Dr will ok adding cereal to the milk...that overfeeds them and can cause them to throw up. You can spoon feed them cereal, both rice and oatmeal cereal by Gerber work well...the oatmeal has more fiber and keeps tummies fuller longer.

I don't think hunger is the nap problem, however. Have you tried bunting your baby. We would wrap ours in a recieving blanket, snugly, but with room to breathe. We would fold the blanket into a triangle, put the baby in the center, then crisscross the sides and tuck the tails under the baby. My kids just liked the snuggly feeling of being held and that might work for yours too. Also, I got "light blocking shades" from JC Penney for $20 a piece. They are the roll-up kind and work amazingly well to keep the room dark...that way the baby will produce Melatonin which will help him sleep. I am not a big fan of letting my little ones scream. After three, I have figured out there are more gentle ways of getting them down. Sometimes I would have to stand and pat the baby. She would wake up as soon as I took my hand off her, but then I got smart and did the "old switcheroo." I took a teddy bear and held it on her and the weight of it simulated my hand. She wouldn't even stir when I left the room. Creative Mothering...good luck!

hi Q., my son is 5 months, we were having some of the same issues. i read the book 'healthy sleep habits, happy child' - it helped some. i am not a fan of totally crying it out, but we do a modified version. i let him go for 20 -30 minutes during the day, and then go check on him and try a few minutes of soothing (whatever that is for you). we just started cereal (in a bowl with a spoon - not a good idea to put it in the bottle) this month and it made no difference what-so-ever with his sleep habits. a month ago he only slept in 20-40 minute increments and now all of a sudden he sleeps 1.5-3 hours at a time. not sure if it is something i did or just part of his development - probably both. i suggest looking at some of the books out there on sleep to get you started in the right direction.

Hi Q.,
I had children like that too. I read somewhere that if they are unhappy when you lay them down that it may be that it is painful and may be reflux. My first child suffered from it and would not lay down. Try having him up on a pillow or wedge so that he is not flat. About a 30' angel should work.
Also have you tried breastfeeding while laying down and let him fall asleep like that. I used to do that a lot. It is pretty comfortable once you get a good position. I used to sleep like that all night. I would have a pillow supporting my back and my baby was in front of me and feeding. It was great. I slept very well and so did he.
Another suggestion is that maybe he is still hungry. Some babies really like a lot to eat. I would not try to give baby cereal until it is absolutely necessary. Their gut is not ready until they are 6 months old.
I am also not a fan of the cry method. Babies don't understand. They are not crying to annoy you, just to let you know that they need something.
Good luck,
W.

Hi Q.
I really think 4 mos old is too young for 'cry it out' -athough we used it with great success at 10 and 11 mos for both our sons.
A good book for now is the Healthy Sleep Happy Child. Until he matures more, just make sure he doesn't have gas (lots of burping, even Mylecon before you put him down) and also try the Chamomile tablets, they dissolve on the tongue and really work.
And maybe the book will help you, it worked for us.
Plus, it will pass eventually, small comfort now, i know. But good luck

Hi. I also have a 4 month old who was having trouble napping and just recently was having trouble staying asleep at night (it would take 45min or an hour to get her down and she would wake 4+ times before sleeping soundly). This probably isn't what you want to hear, but we did use the Ferber method. We are still using it, but once we started it only took a few days to work - for the last 3 nights she has been going down for the night with NO crying and sleeping 10-12 hours without waking. She has also been napping a bit better (she has always been a bit of a cat napper) going down easily and napping for 45 min or an hour about 4 times a day.

I think the important thing is to buy and read the book before doing it if you're going to try it. It's not just letting them cry for as long as they will cry. Also, you have to make the decision to do it and then be consistent - just trying it here and there won't work. The book also explains why it is important for them to learn to soothe and sleep and really helped with the guilt I was feeling about letting her cry. Our baby really only cried for a little bit in the beginning (maybe 17 minutes was the longest) but now she wakes up so happy and her days are much better, so it was worth it to me. But, please, get the book if you're going to do it. Good luck.

Ok, I maybe shouldn't post, because I might just scare you! I too have the same problem...but, she is now 9 months! It started about 4 weeks old. She woke up...and never went back to sleep! I was trying to hard to do the eat, wake, sleep method. For 2 months, I fought it and she cried all the time and never went to sleep! We would have days go by with no sleeping the entire day...not in the swing, bouncy seat, nothing! So, I finally switched the schedule to eat, sleep, wake. I swaddled her up and nursed her to sleep...held her for a bit, then put her down. The other problem is, she wakes up almost every time at the 45 min. mark...so, she is never getting deep, good sleep. We've been doing this now for months...everyone says she will grow out of it..I'm thinking I'm going to have to get harsh and really let her cry...but, i've done it and she'll just cry for hours!
So, with that said...realize that every baby is different and don't feel like you're doing something wrong if other people judge your parenting. You're doing the best you can with your situation.

One tip is the swaddling - it is a life saver. I can hardly get her to fall alseep if she's not swaddled up...because she keeps moving her arms and won't settle down. She fights it, but try swaddling him up, getting him to sleep, then put him down. I would also suggest to try to back yourself out of this method before he gets too old, like us! But, maybe...always do same bedtime routine - make room dark (we had to put black out fabric on curtains), turn on noisemaker, swaddle up, eat and get to sleep. Then, after he gets that process down, start backing yourself out of it! Try doing everything, then put him down while he's not quite asleep.

I'll be looking forward to hearing responses from everyone else, so I can get advice! Good luck and let me know if you have any other questions!

My son did the same thing and I would hold him a while so he would nap (horrible, I know:(). He did grow out of it. We started feeding him cereal at 4 months with our Pedi's approval. He is now 6 1/2 months and LOVES food! Just don't put cereal in his bottle...use a bowl and spoon

I have a seven month old son and we had the same problem from the 4-5 month mark. I'm not completely opposed to crying it out, that is, if they fall asleep after 15 or 20 minutes. When our baby would cry, though, he would just work himself up more and sleep was no where in sight. So, I still nurse him to sleep, then wait until he is definitely asleep, 10 or 15 minutes. Then I lay him down in the crib with my chest near his to let him know I am still near by. Once he has adjusted to his new setting, I slowly move away. I've also noticed he sleeps better on his side (maybe because he nurses on his side?) So, I'll roll up a blanket and prop it behind his back. He'll typically sleep from 45min to 1.5 hrs. Sometimes he'll wake after 30min and I have to do the same routine, but it's always a bit shorter. The other thing to mention, is that your nursing/nap time has to be very consistent. Pick a week where you know you won't be out and about during his nap times. Then always nurse him in the same place, close the curtains, and follow the exact same routine every nap time. This way as he grows developmentally he'll learn to expect a nap after his feed (in the crib hopefully).

Elizabeth Pantley's No Cry Sleep Solution was helpful for us.

Hope this helps! I feel your pain!

I feel your pain, really. I had this same problem with my daughter - now 15 months - until she was probably 7 or 8 months old. Between 25 and 50% of the time if I put her in the swing when she'd just eaten and fallen asleep she'd stay asleep; it was less than 1 in 10 for going to the crib. Desperate for her to sleep and not be cranky (and to sleep myself sometimes) I'd let her sleep either attached to me or with her head on my chest. Everyone else swore by the swing - and we even got a nice one as a gift from several people who were convinced it was the best invention ever, so if you haven't tried that do. I confess I didn't solve the problem I just dealt with it by making sure I had something to read and a big glass of water before I nursed her and then I'd read and she's sleep. Several people suggested I try slipping her a pacifier right as she was finishing so she'd think she was still nursing and then stay asleep. (That didn't work for me but it sounds like a good idea and I didn't see anyone else suggest it.)
Only later did I discover the real source of the problem was she was not getting enough milk. I nursed exclusively and on-demand (which sometimes meant every hour or two) for about 6 months before I went back to work and then I started pumping. I quickly realized I was getting much less than what she wanted/needed to consume. I suppose that the reason she had such trouble napping was she couldn't gorge herself on milk before falling asleep. She had enough but didn't feel "full". Once I broke down and started supplementing with formula things were better. Find out what your milk production is like by pumping - it might not be so much your baby need cereal as he needs just more calories period! (Also, don't put cereal in the bottle unless your pediatrician explicitly tells you to do that.)

does he arch his back alot. if so ask your doc about reflux.
Laying down may be painful and burn his cheast and throat.That was the case with my son. He takes Prevacid 2 times a day and now rest soundly

Q.,
My daughter will be 4 months Friday and I have been having the same issue all week. She used to fall asleep in her swing, but now that doesn't work. Please let me know what you find out. We go for our 4 month check up on Monday, so if I learn anything there I will pass it along. Best wishes!____@____.com

L.

If you can stand it, just let him cry, he will get tired and go to sleep. You might try laying down with him and then slipping away.
Good luck.
Frances

My child is 5 1/2 months. She has been taking wonderful naps (most of the time) and sleeping thru the night since she was 8 weeks.

Go get the book Babywise. It is all about napping and how to get your child on a schedule.

My daughter did this at first. I did let her cry it out for about 20 min. Then, I would go in, rock her for about 10 min. or until she calmed down and tried again. Sometimes this went on for her entire nap time (1 1/2 to 2 hrs) but eventually, she learned to go to sleep on her own. It was hard work and very frustrating at times but well worth it.

For all of my kids but especially the youngest, the pediatrician recommended feeding rice cereal from the spoon. Only 1-2 tbsp. per day but what a difference! The girls started food at about 4-5 months. The 2 older boys started food at around 3 months. The youngest started food at 5 weeks! He went from only sleeping about 10 min. 4 or 5 times during the day and off/on during the night (max. amount of downtime 2 1/2 hours) to 2 2hr naps during day and 2 4+hours at night (he'd wake up "starving" in the middle of night, get an 8 oz bottle then back to sleep).
My recommendation? Keep a tally of when and for how long this baby sleeps. Then tell the pediatrician that the baby is not sleeping enough and ask for solutions. If the doctor is worth anything, then they will listen to you, ask more questions, and offer suggestions.
This may just be the way your baby is right now though.
Best of luck and let us know!