22 Month Old Pre-terrible 2 - Jacksonville,FL

Hey-
My daughter is around the same age (2 in Sept) and we had to start giving a pop on the hand when she had her temper fits. We firmly tell her eye-to-eye that she is not going to act that way and then give her a pop on her hand. After the pop, we ask her to say she is sorry, and once she apologizes we hug and let her know how much we love her. So far we have seen a decline in the tantrums, and usually when she starts to have a fit, I can get down on her level and look her in the eye and tell her to stop doing whatever it is and redirect her to something else and it works!! I have learned fast that each day is different and just because one thing works one day does not mean that it will work the next! Just be consistant and hopefully this stage will pass quickly!

My daughter hit her terrible twos around 18 months and it lasted well into her being 3 years old. I believe their anger is actually frustration and it's not something that has to be learned.. so they don't have to ever had been around violence. They just start to become independent and frustrated that they can't do all that they try or want to do. My daughter got pops on her hand around that age and I would move her to something else to distract her.. which sometimes worked. It is a phase and definitely not a fun one, but will pass over time. Good luck!

S.,

She is not too young for a pop on the leg.
You really have to set some boundaries and stick to them.
Terrible two's actually begin as early as 18 months (sometimes earlier). But, you must follow up the outbursts with consequences. Don't do it in anger though, take a second to catch your breath, and then give her the consequence. Then, explain to her why she has the consequences.
Take Care.

Terrible two is a misnomer.... they hit it anytime they want to, especially if they are more verbal or physically advanced for their peer age group. Being that your other post says you have older kids, I am pretty sure that your daughter is advanced for her age group.

Second, kids learn what the meaning of no is around one year of age. Once they know what no means, they are old enough to have their hands, feet or butt spanked or understand time-outs.

Also, when a temper is thrown, my husband and I just tell our two and a half year old, get up off the floor or you are going to get a spanking. If that doesn't work, we stand her up ourselves, give her her spanking, and then send her to time out. By then she usually understands that she shouldn't have done the temper tantrum and she calms herself done and apologizes. But we started right where you are now... with the first swat.

I have read the book by John Rosemond called parenting by the book and it really gives you a good insight into a child. He also has a website if you google his name you will find it.

I hope this helps.

J. C

She's not to little to get her hand or leg popped. At this age kids will try their parents at anything.IF you continue to let this behavior to happen then who's the parent???? You need to step up and take control of the behavior and Remember your the mom and she is the child. Take all of her stuff away that she treasures and put her in the corner. Tough love! Believe me they understand they just don't want you to know they do.

Time out - 1 minute for each year (how old they are). My son is 2 1/2 and although we went through some times of trouble it was short lived. I used time out and popping on the hand to teach him right from wrong and it worked for him. He knows that it is not acceptable to hit, throw things, kick, have temper tantrums, etc.

Don't get me wrong everyone needs to act out how they feel at times but we have to help them find better ways of doing it than the normal 2 year old. If my son is frustrated and I can see he's getting to a point were he is going to start acting out I turn his attention, take him outside and let him run loose, whatever you come up with. Thus far it's worked for us. The only times we have issues now is when he misses nap time or doesn't get enough sleep and the only cure for that is sleep.

Unfortunately, terrible twos start around 18 months for some (like mine!!)I would just try to tell her that she's not going to get whatever it is that she wants and if she's going to throw a temper tantrum (or fit) then she has to either go in her room or in her crib and have her fit. My middle son turns 2 in July and we do this with him. We will put him in his crib and leave him there until he's done screaming. I go check in on him after about 5 minutes and ask him if he's ready to come out now. But as soon as he starts screaming again, back in his crib until he's quiet. Sometimes he's there for 30 minutes!! Be patient, but more important - be consistent. Every single time a fit starts coming, put her in her crib. If you aren't at home - like the grocery store, take her back to the car and put her in her seat until she's quiet.
I wish you the best of luck!!!
Jen