20 Month Old Restless Sleep

Updated on September 02, 2008
J.C. asks from Allegan, MI
23 answers

My son is 20 months old and a very restless sleeper at night. I put him to be at 8:00, and by 10:00 I can hear him rolling all around in his bed, and sometimes he even sits up and quietly calls for me or my husband. He does this in almost a whisper, so I don't think he is really awake. He wakes up about 7:00 a.m. and is almost always tired. He gets a 2 hour nap from noon to 2, and his afternoons are much better than his mornings (as far as him being rested). Does anyone have suggestions? I've thought about 2 naps a day and have tried to give him a nap at 10:00 to noon, and another at 4:00 or 5:00. However, he won't sleep during the second nap.

Also, we have a good evening routine, and his life is really stable (so I can't think that his life is being disrupted). Every night we do bath, brush teeth, and sit with daddy on the couch for a few minutes. He kissed daddy goodnight and I take him to bed, say prayers, turn on his night light and radio, and go out of the room. He doesn't cry at bedtime and seems to enjoy going to bed.

The parent educator suggested a sleep study, but I don't know what they would do for him if there were a problem. I don't want him on medication.

What can I do next?

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L.S.

answers from Grand Rapids on

Do you leave the radio on all night? I have heard that you don't sleep as well if you use a tv or radio to fall asleep to or if it's on while you are sleeping. I would try to take away the radio.

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D.P.

answers from Detroit on

Does he snore, or breath heavy? It tooks us until our son was 5 to figure out he had allergies and his adenoids were to large, his passage way was that of a small coffee straw! yikes is right. He had them taken out in March of this year, and purs like a kitten, and is so very well rested. No more waking up at night for our guy now. Maybe your ped can refer you to a ENT, and they can take at look at you lil guy?
Good luck!

1 mom found this helpful
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J.H.

answers from Detroit on

I had two thoughts come to mind after reading your message...
1. my son slept in cycles... for a few weeks he slept really well.. then for a few weeks he'd wake up every hour or two. He did this for a while... I tried a bunch of things to break this. The one thing that worked was experimenting with things put in his room. The Christmas lights... then the lava lamp.... Now he's 12 and still relies on having a night light in his room. He can't seem to sleep deeply without some subtle light in his room.

My other thought... I've had restless leg syndrome since I was a kid. If I get too warm or tangled in my blankets, it can just bring it on worse. Now, I don't know if 20mth old toddlers can have this... but alot of people think its an adult only problem... so I figured I'd just mention it anyway.

Good luck with your little guy

1 mom found this helpful
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S.H.

answers from Kalamazoo on

I saw that you said you turn on his radio at night. My question would be do you then turn it off or does it have a timer and shut off after a certain amount of time it could be the radio going off that makes him restless or on the other side of that it could be the fact that even though the music may help him fall asleep it may prevent him from getting into deep or REM sleep during the night causing him to be restless. The same thing goes for a night light being on all night if it is too bright. Another thing to check is have you noticed him holding his breath or stop breathing in a consitant pattern during the night while not very common in small children sleep apnea can cause restless sleep and the feeling of being tired during the day. If you don't find a solution in the next mnth or so or if he doesn't seem to just out grow this phase soon. I would have him do a sleep study it is unlikly that the would put him on medication unless it is his his only option and good sleep is important for all around health.

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L.B.

answers from Detroit on

Do the radio and night light stay on all night? I know my oldest son can not sleep with a night light. Also, my youngest started waking up at 5 am every morning. I began putting him to bed an hour earlier and now he sleeps longer, I guess what they say about being over-tired can be true.
Or it may just be a cycle he's going through.
Good luck!

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A.L.

answers from Grand Rapids on

I would definelty go for the sleep study, you would be amazed what things can be done to help with sleeping issues that do not involve medication. It sounds like he doesnt have trouble geting to sleep but the quality of sleep is the problem, that is whya sleep study would be good, find out what type of sleep he is actually getting or not getting to solve the problem, it could be as little as elevating the bed. I have had problems getting my 3 boys to sleep here and there during different stages in life and stressful times but now that they are older I found a vitamin called melatonin that works well, it was recommended by my doctor as alternative to using prescrition meds.

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M.M.

answers from Detroit on

omigosh it sounds like you are doing everything perfect. have you tried putting him to bed one hour later to get him a bit more tired? Other than that and maybe just making his 2nd nap a bit earlier even if he isnt tired have him lay down with a book or teddy for one hour of rest.... my first son was not a napper and this new one really isnt either. Different little guys have different patterns... my one year old is a tosser and turner as well :)

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K.C.

answers from Detroit on

one of my twins did that, he had sleep apnea and needed his tonsils out.
contact your pediatrician and let them know about the waking up and not sleeping well. watch him and see how he his doing while sleeping, gasping or long periods between breaths and snoring.
good luck,

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D.

answers from Detroit on

Hi J.,

My son had restless sleep also. He had ear infections frequently during this time so I assumed he had fluid in his ears that bothered him. BOY! was i wrong! He is sensitive,allergic, or intolerant to many foods now. and i know for sure that is what was bothering him as he is lactose intolerant. at that time he was about 10months and i was nursing so his pure milk came in the form of yogurt and cheese primary. Does your son have eczema? that is a tell tale sign of allergies and since young kids generally dont develop outside allergies until they are approx 2-3yrs old, your best bet would be food. if you think there is a chance of this, feel free to email me. We have been down a long long road but my son is finally now, a year later, starting to get better and i would always love to help someone else.

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L.J.

answers from Detroit on

my daghter is 16 months old and gets 2 naps. she also gets up at 7, i lay her back down at 8 or 9 for the morning nap she will sleep about 1/2 to an hour, and she gets her afternoon nap from about 12:30 till about 1:30/2 o'clock.
an earlier moning nap can keep your afternoon noon nap at the same time.

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H.F.

answers from Detroit on

Try putting him to bed earlier. My son is a little younger than yours (16 mos), but he's in bed from 645 pm to 7 am. I've read that young children should go to bed between 6 (I know it sounds crazy) and 8 pm. I wouldn't make any radical changes right away, but try to bump him up in 20 minute increments for a few nights and see what happens. Based on what I've read, he's grown out of the two nap phase. His second nap would probably get too late and interrupt his bedtime. Sounds like you have a great routine, so you don't want to mess with that. Two naps stop for many kids around 13 mos. or so.

As far as the radio is concerned, I stopped turning the radio at night on a few months ago. There was a report on the news about how background noise interrupts sleep (in both adults and kids). I've always heard that we should sleep in a dark quiet room, so I figured it's best to get him used to it now. We haven't had any problems.

Good luck. Email me if you want the book where I've gotten my information. It's been a life saver since my son was 4 months old.

H.

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A.H.

answers from Detroit on

He's just a bit overtired that he can't settle himself completely. Put him to bed earlier every day by 15 minutes until you reach a good time. Anywhere from 6 - 8 is appropriate; just a half hour or so can make a big difference. :o) Sounds like you have a good routine for everything else. Good luck!

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D.D.

answers from Detroit on

Hi J.,

My name is Stacy. Have you ever heard of Monavie? It's a fruit juice that contains 19 fruits. It's an all natural drink, and you only take 2 oz twice a day. I used to have problems sleeping since I was a teenager. I would wake up every 2-3 hours 2 or 3 times a night, and never get a full nights sleep. I started drinking this juice, and my husband gets up in the middle of the night to take our 3 year old to the bathroom, and I never wake up! For once I now get to sleep all night long, and I feel so refreshed in the morning. It has done wonders for me, and I'm sure it will help him out as well!! The best part about it is it's not a medication, so there are no side effects. It's just loaded with a lot of antioxidants. If you want more information go to my website at www.the-team.biz/mv978655 Hope this info helps you in some way.

Talk to you later,
Stacy

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F.W.

answers from Detroit on

I agree with Debers. He falls asleep with out issue, so something is waking him up. Sleep apnea, or disruption is very common, and if they snore a little bit, that is a telltale sign. It cuold be a growth spurt, like growing pains, it could be teething, or if the radio and light is on it could be that. The atmoshere is easy to fix, so hoepfully you will try those first, but if those changes aren't helping, and you've given time to see if it is a growth issue, I could check with an ENT. I don't know what kind of medication they would give a child for sleeping,if any, but they will check for adenoids, tonsils, and whatever else could be obstructing his airway and disrupting his sleep.Good luck.

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S.R.

answers from Detroit on

I think I'd try bed earlier than later, as I've never had luck with the "tiring them out" approach. The light and radio could definitely be affecting him. One of my sons has anxieties and at age 2 began the restless nights. I didn't realize it at 1st, and he became overly dependent on the light, so we really struggled with trying to keep it off. Your son is young enough to break the habit. I'm not sure what program the radio is tuned to but if it is not satellite, you never know what could be reaching his brain at 3:00 am! Try one of those ocean relaxation CDs they sell at Bed, Bath & Beyond instead so it turns off. I'd try those things before a sleep study.

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N.K.

answers from Detroit on

I have a daughter who is 21 months and she stopped taking naps around 10 months old. The doc said that some babies who can't miss anything wil do that. With that said, I don't expect you to think your son should be doing the same. I don't think that. But maybe he's at the time to where he's going to start missing one nap if he takes two and eventually miss them all together. According to my pediatrician, a child at the age of three no longer needs naps and it is very commom to have children grow out of naps sooner. Also what you have to look at is is he getting enough sleep at night time. At that age usually anywhere from 12-14 hours a day. But I do hear you on when they don't get enough sleep, their day is turned upside down. My daughter goes to bed at 8:30pm and wakes up around 7:30-8am. We go for a walk everyday and she takes a snooze then but that's it. It's very normal for your son to not be wanting to go down for all his naps now that he's getting older and reaching new milestones. Just like my daughter, when she first started potty training, her sleep was very disrupted and now its a little better. Hope I helped a little.

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M.G.

answers from Jackson on

Hi J., You received some very good advice about shifting sleep patterns. That's the kind of information a sleep study would help with.

I'm curious, when did this begin?

May I ask some questions about your son's diet? What does he eat at dinner? snacks after dinner?

Does he have any sinus drainage?

If it seems to you that there may be a connection here and you would like to continue the conversation, I would be happy to share the information I have.
warmly,
M.

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S.W.

answers from Detroit on

Hi J.,
At 20 months old, he only needs one nap. It should be around 12 pm or so and should last 2.5 to 3 hours. Putting him down at 10 am is too early for him to make it all the way to 8 pm and he is probably over tired. I would also lose the radio.

I have 20 month old twins that are on the same schedule. They get up at 7 am and are in bed at 8 pm like your son. They take their nap at noon and and sleep until between 2:30 – 3:30. A couple of great books may help you to better understand how much sleep he should be getting. Good Night, Sleep Tight by Kim West and Solve Your Child's Sleep Problems by Richard Ferber are both really good for telling you as they grow how much sleep and when.

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L.R.

answers from Detroit on

I have a 21 month old daughter. Though she sleeps through the night fine, she does require two naps on some days. However, her morning nap is the most important by far if she is to have a good day. She always sleeps approximately 3-4 hours after waking up in the a.m., but she may or may not sleep in the afternoon. Even though she is always very tired by bedtime (6-6:30p)without the afternoon nap, she would be non functional if I tried to keep her up longer in the morning and focus on an afternoon nap. Maybe try switching to an earlier nap in the morning and then playing the afternoon nap by ear. I base her morning nap time on eye rubbing. If she doesn't rub her eyes, I still make sure she's napping by 10a. Invariably, even with no eye rubbing she conks right out by 10a. Obviously, you know your son and would make adjustments based on his personality and sleep needs. Good luck!!!

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C.M.

answers from Detroit on

When he calls you at 10 pm do you go in his room? Does he actually get up? If he doesn't actually get up and cry etc...I would just let him sit. Maybe he is just unwinding. The old wives tale...warm milk before bed really is true. Calcium relaxes your system. You could get a chewable children's calcium supplement and give it to him about an hour before bed. Works for me!

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L.N.

answers from Benton Harbor on

My son 'sort of' does the same thing. He is a noisy sleeper. Babies have different sleep stages than adults do. He could just be in a transition period where he is starting to fall into deeper stage 3 and 4 sleep and waking up during or before his REM sleep. That would put his REM cycle behind a little so that he is waking up in the morning DURING a REM cycle, which will leave him sleepy and groggy for a while. Try waking him 1/2 hour earlier than his usual and see if that helps. Alternatively, you could try to darken his room and coax him to sleep a little longer. That way he will be waking while he's not in a REM period and will be more alert. If he is hard to wake up, he is likely in stage 3 or 4 sleep. If he wakes right up, he is likely in REM. Either way, I think it's a phase and his body will adjust itself as he grows. You might be able to try to go up there and wake him about 30 minutes before you usually hear him calling for daddy and try to reset his REM. Don't get him out of bed, just tell him you are covering him up or something.

~L.

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M.F.

answers from Lansing on

Hi, J.. I am a mother of 4 boys. They are now 26,22,18 (yesterday), and 16 years of age. I have had experience with the restless sleep situation with a couple of them.

One of the things we finally looked at was diet. Some children are very sensitive to food additives (dyes) and foods that are higher in sugar content. I don't know if I would jump to a sleep study yet. He's pretty young. Even the rapid pace that these little ones grow can affect their sleep.

One more word of encouragement.....by the time he's a teenager....you won't have any restless sleep issues! In fact you will be trying to figure out how he can possibly sleep so much!!!

Best of everything to you with your little guy!

M.

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C.J.

answers from Lansing on

J.,

I have sleep apnea and went through a sleep study last spring. The only reason I was put on medication was so I could become accustomed to my new CPAP machine, I am off the meds now. The CPAP machine helps to keep the airway open so your body doesn't wake you up to start you breathing again.

My doctor did say that because I have sleep apnea, and my dad does as well, I need to keep an eye on my son because he could develop the disorder too. It can be hereditary. He said his office works with children frequently and sometimes just raising up the pillows by a certain degree helps to stop the sleep apnea and allow the child to sleep much better at night.

The issue with sleep apnea is that it can cause health problems farther down the line. If his body isn't well rested then he will more than likely get the flu faster and stay sick longer than his other peers because his body has to work even harder to get better.

Give your insurance company and call, see if they cover the cost of a sleep study, and then schedule an appointment with a sleep doctor in your area.

Good luck!

-C..

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