2 Month Old Wont Take a Bottle, HELP I Have to Go Back to Work Soon....

Babies tell us exactly what they want and your baby wants you! Is there any way you can put off going back to work? I know it's hard (been there, done that) but what is more important? A contented, happy baby or that second income, at least for a little while longer? All the lactation counseling in the world will not replace what your baby is demanding - your loving nuture. They only stay little for a moment and no one can do a better job of caring for them emotionally and physically than you!

Homeschooling SAHM of seven who learned the hard way, hoping to encourage others.

1 mom found this helpful

My little one wouldn't take any bottle with the traditional cylindrical nipple - we tried Playtex VentAire, Soothie, Avent, Platex with the disposable liner, Dr. Brown's, and the first years "Second Nature" too....we finally found these bottles that have a flatter nipple, it is more similar to the shape mothers' nipples go to inside the baby's mouth.....here is a link(at the bottom of the page it shows the smaller 5 oz. bottles, too):

http://www.target.com/Sassy-MAM-9-oz-Bottles-Colors/dp/B0...

http://www.mambabyusa.com/sassy/go?d=bottles

These are the only bottles she would take, and she did great with them. They also have a vent system to let bubbles out the bottom, and our baby was never gassy using these. They are BPA free, and come apart into 5 pieces for easy cleaning (lid, nipple, nipple ring, bottle body, bottom and vent). The second link is where you can order the different nipple flow sizes....my baby only needed a size one nipple (that comes on the 5 oz bottles) till she was 8 months...then size 2 - which comes on the 9 oz. bottles, after that, we never went above size 2. I never had any leaks or issues with them, unless I put them together wrong.

Sometimes you can find them on eBay too, that is where we got all 6 of ours.

Good Luck.

1 mom found this helpful

My daughter did the same thing shortly before I had to go back to work. What we tried was having me start nursing her for a few minutes. This at least calmed her down so she wasn't screaming. Then my husband fed her a bottle and I walked out the room. Daycare said the first two days were a little rough, but she seemed to enjoy the Playtex drop ins with the brown nipple the best. Now she reaches out for her bottle and has adjusted well. Good luck.

Hello: Have you tried Dr. Brown's bottles? I purchased them at Babies R Us . . . it was the only bottle my daughter would take. They are very close to the breast and she transitioned well to these. We were in the same boat when I had to go back to work as well.

My son would also not take the bottle. We were getting ready to do a lot of traveling over the summer and I didn't want to have to stop every three hours to breastfeed him. We tried 5-6 types of bottles. I too called the lactation specialist and she had a "special" nipple that she gave me that fit on the medela bottles. She said that it worked with most of the babies that had this problem. Sure enough, it worked! It did take a little while till he was able to really suck down a whole bottle but he was able to at least get enough to get by at first. The nipple didn't have a name or anything on it but the milk drips out like crazy so he didn't have to do much work to get the milk out. Now at 13 months he doesn't want to give that bottle up! And I have milk dripping all over my floor whenever he leaves it laying on its side.

I too had difficulty with my daughter taking a bottle. She ended up liking the old school playtex bottles with the latex nipples. It helped when we warmed the nipple before introducing it to her. When I did have to go back to work, she never really drank as much as I know she did with me, but my family needed the income. I have also heard of babies who never did take a bottle and would wait until mom could nurse. I would suggest seeing if you can wait longer to go back to work, trying to nurse on breaks. Just weigh out your needs and what is feasible for your life and be comfortable with your decision. Your son will adapt to any changes - kids are resilient. Try not to worry so much and let things happen...I know it's difficult to do! Trust yourself and you'll be fine!

Here's a good website that gives advice on a different feeding method with bottles that helps reduce flow preference or nipple preference - a baby that prefers the breast and won't take the bottle or vice versa: http://www.lowmilksupply.org/bottles.shtml

Also read the section on recommended nipples. I used this in the beginning when we were supplementing baby with breast milk in bottles. What you mentioned about the milk coming too fast is common, and refers to flow preference, and this method of bottle feeding mimics breastfeeding in that the milk does not pour into their mouth and they have to work for it, same as in breastfeeding.

I have read a lot of the other responses and have seen many mom's saying to stay home longer if possible. I am a Mary Kay Beauty Consultant and also work a full-time job. I have a 10.5-month old that I am still nursing. I know a lot of mothers who are able to stay at home to raise their children while running a home based business. Maybe this is God's way of telling you that you need to take a change in your life. My goal is to be able to pick up my business and stay at home with my children. They are only little for so long and we need to cherish more than we do. Good luck to you. A.

A baby who cannot take a bottle for whatever reason is a medical emergency that requires you to stay home until you figure it out. Your work will have to give you a longer leave since you cannot just drop him at a daycare hoping he'll "get over it". It could be a hundred things... any number will have to be resolved before you leave him. Start by giving in to this reality and you will relax a little as you find the answers.

It is easy for a new mom to believe that she has to go back to work right on the day her leave ends, but this is NOT true! Take the time your baby needs to adjust - the world will wait.

Try this: Put something other than breast milk in the bottle - my recommendation is a sweetened tea... chammomile perhaps, which is calming, and sweeten it with something natural like maple syrup (not honey - babies cannot eat honey). Drip a little into his mouth before you gently put in the nipple so he can taste something new that interests him.

This won't be an actual feeding, so only give him an ounce or two if he'll drink it. Day by day he will get used to the nipple if he likes the new flavored drink. One day do a few ounces of breast milk in the bottle to see if he will take it. Mix the two - tea and breast milk if you have to (yummmm.... tea and milk!).

If this doesn't work, you might have a case of a baby with a latex allergy or other compound allergy. If you haven't tried non-latex nipples, look for them. If you have, you may be in for a long road.

Either way J., you are going to have to relax about working for now. Really - take a deep breath and believe for a moment that the world will not stop if you miss a few weeks or a few months of work. Give yourself permission to have time with your new baby to figure out life with him.

I don't know if it is possible for you but when I went back to work after having my daughter I went and nursed her at lunch until she got the hang of having bottles all day. That way I knew that she was getting enough while she was transitioning. I didn't even give her a bottle before taking her to daycare. They also have special nipples now that act more like a breast because they only let milk out if the baby sucks it. I have seen them a drug stores. It will work out fine, it always does. Good Luck!

Do you make sure the bottle is warm? when my dd was 3 months I had the same problem, then I heated the bottle warmer, and VOILA..it worked.

I am a daycare provider and as the lactition has already told you they will eat when they are hungry. Don't force it. Let him ask/cry for it. Then you will know that he is hungry. It will take a couple of missed feedings before he realizes that he IS hungry. Hang in there - if you have a good provider that is patient with this she maybe able to help you. And relax, he feels your tension. Good luck

Hi-

I have a 23 month old that would only take a bottle at nap and at night. Otherwise she'd arch her back and scream. She had acid reflux and a milk allergy. We switched to Alimentum (no milk formula), got her on Prevacid and had an Occupational Therapist come work with her because it had gone on for so long that she just hated eating. Guess she knew that eating hurt her tummy and was trying to prevent the hurt. Good luck!

I have 2 boys 20 months and 8 months. My younger son was a preemie so he had a bottle from the start but both of my children always had a preference for me over the bottle. We found that the stage 1 nipples were too hard for our boys to get any milk from so they would get frustrated so we used the stage 2 playtex nipples from the start. The playtex ventaire bottles are the only ones our boys would take. Also, I found that if I was present it was more difficult to get them to take the bottle.
Both of our boys went on a "bottle strike" on a couple of occasions after I returned to school. I spoke with the pediatrician and she said they would eat what they needed to and would make up for what they didn't eat when they are back with you. I hope this helps. Good Luck!

My daughter had the same aversion to bottles before I went back to work. The first few days she just didn't really eat until I got home. (luckily she wasn't up all night, either, but somehow just managed) I don't know the technique they used at daycare, but they mentioned that the teacher who was a mom and had BF was able to get her to take a bottle by holding her really tight. They also recommended Gerber Clearview bottles with the really little rubber nipples. The first couple weeks she would only take an ounce or two at a time, but after about two weeks she was up to a 3 ounce bottle.
Good luck!

J.,
I know what you're going through regarding your little one taking a bottle. I have three children now, and nursed them all for almost a year. My oldest was the hardest to take a bottle at 4 months. I had to go back to work within weeks and she still wasn't taking a bottle. I was so worried and frustrated. My husband was the one who worked with her over and over and over. I actually had to leave the house crying and go for a walk because I just couldn't take her crying. On top of it all she was collicky, horribly. To make matters worse we were on vacation out of state because I was in a wedding and he needed to feed her while I was at rehearsal and in the wedding. She refused the entire time. You can hear my baby crying throughout my friend's whole wedding ceremony on the video tape. It was just horrible because I was leaking too while this was happening in my bridesmaid dress.

So, like I said, I know how you feel. When they tell you he'll drink from the bottle when he's hungry, it's true. When we got back from vacation, we just decided not to nurse her at all until she took from a bottle. She finally gave in. I guess that would be my suggestion. Don't feed him anything or nurse her. He may know right now that you will eventually nurse him if he doesn't take the bottle. I'm assuming that's what you're doing so far. He's smart. He knows Mommy loves him too much to hear him cry. I would suggest not giving him anything until he takes the bottle. He will give in. I know it sounds cruel, but he will give in before he starves. It helps too, I think, to have someone else do it. That way, when you take him she knows you will give him the nipple he really wants.

My only hesitation on the advice is the fact that you said he is a preemie. Mine weren't, so I'm not up on the facts for premature babies. I hope this helps.

I feel your pain!

I also agree with the not going back to work if you don't have to. That is just huge. The attachment is normal and there is a reason for it.
J.

There are other options besides a bottle. If your son will suck on your finger, you can use a tube and a syringe to feed him. I also did this with my babies before they were old enough to take a bottle. Babies can drink from a cup almost from birth. It is tricky and takes a while, but it works. Both of my babies did it. Ask a lactation consultant about these options. She can give you some more specific directions and supplies. I also agree with the mother who said to relax about going back to work. You may need to wait awhile or work part-time. Maybe your job will work with you on this one. Good luck!

A.

I had a child like that! She would scream at the bottle like we were trying to poison her! I had her in "daycare" for a week for something special, otherwise I was always home with her. During that week she NEVER took a bottle from the sitter. Not once. The sitter had to give her babyfood to get through the day. She was 4 months old.

I recently found a new bottle that I would try if I was nursing a little one again. The Adiri Natural Nurser Ultimate Bottle. http://thesoftlanding.com/adnanu.html It looks so much more like a real breast, lol. The nipple doesn't come off the bottle, the bottom of the bottle comes off. Strange, but looks like it might work!
Good luck! I feel your pain.

My son, who is now 11 months did the exact same thing when i went back to work. i was an absolut wreck my 1st few months back at work. i too tried many different bottles, the Playtex drop-ins w/ the latex nipple worked for us. as hard as it is to comprehend, your son will eat if he's hungry. trust me, he will. don't force the bottle b/c he will sense the stress that you or whom ever is trying to give him the bottle. if your trying to force it, he'll never relax and take it. my son was probably 5 months before he finally gave in and started taking the bottle- but we have continued to have bottle issues. the second i would pick him up after work, i would nurse him. he continued to gain weight (even w/out eating most of the day)and is a very happy healthy boy. now he's on solids and doens't want to eat much for his sitter while i'm at work. but as soon as i get home and we sit down for dinner he eats like a little piggy. it all worked out in the end, and it will for you as well. Just hang in there and stay calm, don't force the issue. i cannot tell you how many times i left work to go to the sitters house to try to get him to eat, and i would get myself so worked up over it. once i finally relaxed and accepted the situation for what it was, we just learned to deal with it. bottom line, if he's hungry- he will eat.
Hang in there and good luck :)

i haven't had a chance to read all the other responses. but i had a similar problem when my daughter was 2mos & we switched to the playtex "natural" nipples with our drop-ins. They are a tan color & theres somethind about the texture they like better. i swear we had an episode where she screamed in the car until i switched the nipple on her bottle & then WA-LA! magic.
good luck & hang in there, i know it can be very frustrated.
also, have you had his ears checked for infection? bc it might hurt him physically to change his sucking pattern.

I know every baby is different, but this is worth a shot. My daughter liked her bottle really warm, and we ran the vacuum cleaner while we were feeding her to calm her down. It worked when nothing else did. We eventually ran the vacuum just to get her started and then not at all.

Good Luck!

I had a similar situation when I went back to work after my daughter was born. I had a great daycare provider who worked through it with her and I was also able to go and nurse once during the day on my lunch hour - If you are close enough to get there once a day that may help - and then we nursed when I picked her up.

We did this and kept trying other things and in the end, I found a great bottle recommended by another mom with the same problem. It is the Sassy MAM bottle. You can order from Target.com, but they don't sell them at the store.

Good luck - I know it can be tough!

I feel your pain :) My three month old recently starting refusing the bottle in much the same way a week before I went back to work. Hysterically crying and screaming. I know that you said you tried various bottles and nipples but I have had success with a product I had never seen before (this is my third child) called "Breastflow". It's a 1st years product and I got it a Target. It's very odd looking because it has a nipple within a nipple that is supposed to simulate the "latch on" and "letdown" of breastfeeding. While bottling is still not her favorite thing in the whole world she will eat from this one. Good Luck!

Have you tried different milk temps? My 3 1/2 month old just had a hard time at the sitter with a bottle, and we figured out the milk wasn't warm enough for her liking.

Try not to panic, to talk to a real person try calling La Leche League. My 4th child did not nurse for the first month of his life, we fed him with an eye dropper, cup and finally a bottle. I have heard of babies who waited all day to nurse when mom got off of work. If your schedule is flexible maybe your can nurse the baby on your lunch or break.
C.

My daughter has never taken a bottle, so good luck. Maybe he's trying to tell you something. Is there possibly a way that you could work from home at least part-time? Many employers will let you telecommute even if this was not an option before it doesn't hurt to ask. I personally changed my profession to go into direct sales so I could stay home with my daughter and I am thankful every day that I made that choice. She is now almost a year and I've never had to pump or give her a bottle. Another option at least until he's used to it is to ask for longer lunch breaks so you could at least go and nurse him once during the day. As for a bottle to try they say just to pick one and stick with it until he gets used to it.

Hi J. :)

I went through the same thing with my daughter! She also would take the bottle better from me at first. If my husband tried giving her one, she would have NOTHING to do with it! After doing some research on the issue I came across something that said not to force bottle feeding on to your baby because they will start to view the bottle as something negative and this might cause them to avoid bottles for even longer. So I decided to take a gentle approach. Once a day, about 15 minutes before I knew she would be hungry and during a time of day when she wasn't sleepy (that way she wouldn't get frusturated while trying to learn something new) I would rock her and hold the bottle right at her lips. If she wanted to try taking the bottle she would open her mouth. If she didn't, she would turn away. I NEVER put the nipple in her mouth unless she gave me the "ok" by opening her mouth. Some days she would just play with the nipple by chewing on it, some day she would flat out refuse the bottle all together, some days she would actually drink 1 or 2 ounces from it! After about two weeks of this she finally ate an entire meal from a bottle! :) After that, we had to work on getting her to take the bottle from my husband. What worked for us was for him to rock her, then I would put the bottle in her mouth and then he would take over from there. After a few times of doing this she started taking the bottle from him without my help. She is now taking the bottle no matter when we give it to her or where she is! :)

Here are some things that other people suggested to me before she was taking a bottle. I didn't try any of these things but you might find something helpful :) A pediatrician suggested dipping the nipple of the bottle in a little bit of sugar water so that they baby might be more likely to latch on. Someone else suggested that I leave the house while my husband try bottle feeding (actually I did try this one by going for a walk around the block but it didn't work for us). Sometimes a baby can sense if the mother is still in the house, so they will refuse the bottle from their father because they want their mother. Another suggestion was to leave her for an entire day with someone else so that she was forced to take a bottle if she got hungry. I was warned that she might hold out for 8 hours or longer, and that she would cry, but I'm not into tough love methods and I wanted her to view the bottle as something positive, so I ignored this advice.

I hope you find something that works for you :) And hopefully it works before you have to go back to work! I wish you the best of luck.

(I forgot to mention that the only bottle that worked for us was the Thinkbaby bottle. You can find it on thesoftlanding.com. Also, have you heard of the Adiri Natural Nurser bottles? These bottles are made to be much more like an actual breast than any other bottle. They are specifically designed for babies who are refusing other bottles or having a harder time with bottle feeding. You can also find those on thesoftlanding.com)