I have 5 children very close in age and have never had this problem with the others. Our 17 month old really loves his baby brother, he kisses him and hugs him and wants to sit with him, etc...but the very next moment he hits him or kicks him or will even try to sit on him if he is down low enough. I cannot carry him all day, and he has outgrown his vibrating seat that we kept on the table. Our 17 month old does this to him if he is on the floor, in his bouncy chair, swing, and so on. He laughs about it. Telling him no only works momentarily. Swatting him doesn't help either...any ideas? Happy Thanksgiving!
It sounds like your 17 month old thinks that baby brother is a toy. You will just have a to be really vigilant about watching them, and making sure that nobody gets hurt. Your description really just sounds like the way little ones play with dolls.
It sounds like somebody wants attention and is doing some hitting to get it. My children are 15 months apart and, although, my son LOVED my daughter, he also would hit, pinch, etc...whenever he wanted more attention. At 17 months, I'm sure he can't tell you that he's frustrated, sad, etc... so whenever he hits, take him aside for some one on one time. Even 5 minutes seemed to do the trick with my son.
I agree with the others, consistancy with taking him aside every single time, whether getting on his level & talking to him (they understand a LOT more than we think!!!!) or putting him in a pack n play for a minute (with my daughter, who is 2 & beats up on her big brothers, I set her on her bed and count to five and then we talk). Maybe try putting a positive spin on his hands - "thats not a nice thing to do with your hands, let me show you some nice things to do with your hands. We can shake hands, we can hug, we can give five" etc. Loved this technique when my boys were preschoolers (only I made them tell me what were better ways to use their hands, feet, etc)
It will pass, I know it seems impossible now. My 2nd son did not like my 3rd at all and I had to constantly be right there or I would find the baby being sat on, etc.
They really do test limits around that age, it is so frustrating!!!!!!!
I went through the same thing. I was putting my daughter in timeouts constantly, and trying other things that others have suggested here. Nothing worked. She seemed to enjoy the timeouts, actually! Someone suggested that I ignore the behavior. I thought they were crazy, how could I ignore my baby getting hit?? But, I figured I'd give it a try....and it worked!!! And it worked FAST!! I only had to ignore her like 2 times, and suddenly she wasn't interested in hitting him anymore. I say it's worth a try.
Keep your pack n play out and put him in it every time he hits, or when you have to turn your attention away from him for an extended time (like if you have to use the bathroom).
You could use his crib if a playpen being out all the time would crowd living spaces.
I have a girlfriend with 5 who are very close in age and I remember her saying she had 3 pack n plays out all the time after the 5th was born. She used them for each kid to have her own "quiet time" as well as containment for safety or time out.
