9 answers

10 Month Old Refusing to Sleep

My 10 month old son, who has never had a lot of trouble going to sleep and staying asleep, has decided over the course of the last few nights that he doesn't want to sleep anymore. When we put him in his crib, he will scream and cry and stand up. We have tried to let him cry it out, but, after about 35 minutes, we had to make it stop! Our routine has not changed: bath, jammies, bottle, rock & cuddle, bed. Except now he won't go to bed. Once we finally get him asleep (last night I let him fall asleep in our bed and moved him after about an hour), he will sleep for most of the night then wake early. This morning it was 3:30. My DH tried to get him back down for about an hour and then I took over. It didn't work. Again, we finally gave in and let him get up at 5:30. Has anyone else experienced this? What would cause a sudden, I don't know, fear, in an infant? Any advice on how to deal with this?? We're getting very tired!!!

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More Answers

Just make sure that he doesn't have an ear infection...this would explain why he wouldn't want to lay down (the pressure in the ears changes when laying down making it hurt worse). I hope you guys figure this out, it can be very frustrating.

Are you sure he doesn't have an ear infection? I went thru this a few months back and that's what it was...

A.,

I would first check to see if it's an ear infection, but it's as likely just a growth spurt, a sudden dawning awareness that he misses things when he sleeps, teething, some subtle change in his crib or his room...Ha. Wasn't that helpful?

This was the age when we started letting our now 15-month old son cry it out and it was a lot tougher than even I'd imagined it would be. At the time we were saving money to buy a house and we lived in a one-bedroom apartment and it wasn't like there was anywhere to escape the sobbing of our baby. Man, I felt like a monster. In the end though what worked the best was done in part to soothe me. I decided I just couldn't let him cry for two hours without knowing he was okay, so we did the wait five minutes and go in rub his back and reassure him we were right outside the door. At first this seemed kind of counterproductive since his crying would ramp up as soon as we left him again. We'd wait a little while longer before going in again and going through the same routine - never picking him up or turning on the light. The first night when I tell you it took hours I am not kidding. At least two. I kept telling my husband the poor kid had to be dehydrated from all the tears. After about three really hellish nights it worked pretty well, though any changes mess bedtime up again temporarily. When we moved to our new (old) house there was a period where he was waking up in the middle of the night again.

I know this sounds sort of paranoid or overly dramatic, but he knows by now that he's winning. He's also probably waking up so early because he's overtired from staying up and tormenting you and your husband! Much as it pains you my advice would be once you've ruled out an actual physical ailment, go through your bedtime routine and let the sobbing begin! In the long run I think babies who can find their own ways to soothe themselves to sleep have much better long term sleep habits. A couple of mothers I know swear their infants who learned to sleep well young made the transition from crib to bed with much less drama.

For our son it definately was because he had an ear infection - that was his only sign - no fever, no pulling on his ear, just that he didn't want to sleep.

Good Luck

We are going through the same thing. My son hasn't been sleeping through the night since June. Our pediatrician also told us to let him cry it out, but he gets more hysterical the longer you let him go. Some nights he only gets up once and can be rocked back to sleep or given a binky. Others he's up and down all night long. I've been told it has to do with teething and he will outgrow this stage. Every night I keep my fingers crossed....

Read Dr Sears Night Time Parenting, it saved our lives with our first born. You can also go to his Web site, askdrsears.com Both are wonderful and Dr Sears has never failed me.

The days are long (of nights in your case) but the years are short. Enjoy your little one!
Good Luck,
J.

If it is a fear, as you are guessing, you could use Emotional Freedom Technique. It involves tapping gently on his face and body in specific places and addressing the fear. The relief is immediate. There is lots of free info on the internet about how to do it. One website that focuses on using it with children is www.TappyBear.com It is such a wonderful way to work with our own emotions too. I've used it a lot. I hope you're all soon back to sleeping at night!

Teething? Ear infection? If it happened suddenly that he stopped sleeping well I would probably have him checked out to make sure there isn't anything wrong. Good luck.

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