This is more of a rant than a question... buuut, I always thought I would be the mom who would play outside ALL the time with my kids, NEVER let them watch TV, feed them only the best organic foods, cook something wholesome every single night, dress them season appropriate.. but never ever in character clothes, etc... you get the point. I realized that I am so NOT any of the things I thought I would be. This realization came when I purchased both a lightning mcqueen and spiderman lunch box just to see the happiness on my son's face. He is also sitting in his highchair watching scooby doo eating premade eggo pancakes! When did I become THIS mom???!! ahhhhhhh
Read "I Was a Really Good Mom Before I Had Kids." It might help you feel better and help you to realize that a lot of moms feel like this :)
You became THAT mom when the reality of motherhood hit you like a ton of bricks, lol. Just wait, there will also come a time in his life when he goes with you to the grocery store in swimming trunks, a sweater in a contrasting color and cowboy boots :) Sometimes in parenting, its about choosing your battles and realizing that being relaxed and just "going with the flow" instead of doing what seems to be "the right thing to do." Sit down and enjoy the cartoons with him, or take advantage of the time he is ocupied and enjoy a cup of coffee in peace :)
you became THAT mom when you realized your kids' happiness is your happiness.
:)
o
Reality bites.
We all have illusions of grandeur when we aren't living the life... We do the best we can with the hand we've been dealt. Some moms can seem to do it all - they can veggies, they make home made everything, they quilt, they sew, they seem to do it all - but do they really do it all? Something has to give, right?
Is your child happy?
Is your child healthy?
Is your child loved?
That's all that really matters...
LBC
Life is what happens while you are making other plans! As they get older you can steer a bit more to your original ideal, but it won't always go that way. Enjoy the ride!
I, too, became "THAT" mom... sigh...
And isn't it so completely annoying to be around really new first time moms, or women pregnant with their first child, who are still enjoying their delusion about how they'll do everything right? Don't you wish on one hand that you could just slap them or shake them into what we now know is reality? And on the other hand, secretly laugh at them because you KNOW that they, too, will most probably become "THAT" mom?
The "mom" you had in your brain was largely a myth. If your kids are happy and healthy, you're doing a good job.
Oh yeah...grand ideals when we don't actually have the kids,huh? I try and be the first mom, but oh I fall into THAT mom category more and more.
Is it going to kill them to have pizza one night a week and macaroni and cheese on another night of the week...no. Do premade pancakes make our life easier...you bet they do!!
I have a Hello Kitty and some battle characters I don't even know lunchboxes sitting on my counter.
I aim for 90% healthy vs 10% junk but honestly is is more 70/30...60/40 ??? Who knows!!! I do the best I can...
YES there are a lot of us who feel that way...life gets in the way...lol
I have a 12 yo and 10 yo. You will quickly learn it's all about choosing your battles - both with your child(ren) and yourself. I now firmly believe in a well placed bribe, that 30 min of mindless PBS TV for the kids gets me a shower, a Dum Dum lollipop can cure the worst of hurts, and Kraft mac & cheese w/ it's day glow powdered cheese packet is a food group all it's own.
well so far i am mostly that mom, but only bc i have one child, i am a stay at home mom, and the babies only 10 months old. i am certain it won't last forever (i'm betting it won't last the next 2 months!). the funny thing, i never wanted my babies to have pacifiers (of course before i had a baby). about a day after he was born he was sooo fussy, had trouble nursing but always wanted something in his mouth. i tried to give him a pacifier. to this day... he's sucked on fingers (mine, not his), and has wanted to nurse constantly and i still wish he would have taken to pacifiers! I bought 4 kinds!!! he wouldn't take any!
Welcome to the real motherhood!
I swore I wouldn't let my son watch (or at least a lot!) but when he was teething baby eintein was the only thing that kept him calm so I let him watch. I also let my son go through his food phases (which I swore I would never give into...I still won't cook seperate meals but if he wants something quick...) right now its cheese its crackers it was cheerioes before that and green beans before that
Heehee hee! Great post.
My MIL shared with me early on some valued advice she got from a pediatrician years ago.
"your kids will grow up and be just fine inspite of what you do."
So organic or oreo, if the proper love and care are in place they will surely turn out exactly as God intended them to :)
So many of us are so delusional and often judgemental before we have children. We fantasize about our new identity and how we will do everything right and how our baby will be wonderful and perfect because well, we do everything right!! I do feed my son organic because I feel that is important for him BUT he eats french fries every day (not organic though) ,at almost 2 1/2 I am the one sitting and feeding him oatmeal every morning in front of the TV (horror!!) and I still nurse him before bed (NEVER did I think we would go this long). Just remember you are doing most things right and seriously, what kind of lunch box did you think your son would like? lol
Just like everything else -there's the "real" and the "ideal"! However, what I consider ideal has changed quite a bit since my first pregnancy. Now I consider getting to spend quality time with my kids and seeing their faces light up to be the hallmark of "ideal." This may occur because we're playing outside OR watching Scooby Doo. It may happen because I just handed my oldest son a big bowl of fresh, organic blueberries OR a giant bowl of gummy worm ice cream. Right now he's at all day PreK with a Spiderman backpack and Batman crocs on, and he loves it! The image I had of myself as a mother is definitely different than what I truly am as a mother, but I'm getting more okay with that every day. Love your kids and do your best for them, and they'll most likely be fine.
What's wrong with this mom? Some TV is not bad, and there is nothing wrong with Character clothing, when I take my daycare kindergardner to school I see tinker bell, icarley, batman spider man shirts and backpacks, there's nothing wrong with that. And if you played outside with your child all day
what would the inside of your house look like, nothing wrong with eggo pancakes, relax this sounds like normal to me, and I have been a mom for 26 years. Julie
We are real mom's!! Those who never turn the TV on, eat only organic food, cook wholesome food every night, have a spotless home, and still have time to play with their kids are either on drugs or fake. There is no way to do it all. I'd rather feed my kids eggo's with whipped cream to see them smile and have a dirty home to play with them, or even cuddle with them and watch a movie or two!! Yep, OR TWO!! lol...whatever makes my kids happy is what I do. They don't always get their way, but when we are THIS mom, that means we are the best kind!! Enjoy!
I am totally THAT mom. Minus the character clothing and accessories. Haven't gone that route yet....but mine are both still young so it could still happen...LOL!
GREAT POST! I know the feeling before i had my son i said i would NEVER let him wear chracter clothes and last week i bought him dr. susse shirts and he has a buzz lightyear sippy cup.and he loves to watch Nick Jr all the time! And i always said i would never put my child in daycare, i didnt want to be the mom who only gets 4 hours a day with their child but thats who i am and it makes me sad everyday when he cries when i have to leave....but i guess we gotta do what we gotta do to provide for our little ones. And if it makes them happy to eat pancakes and watch scooby doo thats all that matters!! Bless You Mama.