How To Survive Plane Travel with Toddlers

In the last four years, I’ve taken over 20 flights with small children. Many of these have been by myself with an infant AND toddler. At 30,000 feet I have done the following: breastfed a baby, changed a blow-out in turbulence, caught throw-up in my bare hands, and breastfed a baby during turbulence WHILE catching throw-up in my bare hands.

There’s just no way to put this nicely, so I’m just going to say it… flying with toddlers is not fun. There. I said. No sugar-coating. If you want the honest truth, no flight has ever been “a breeze” because choosing to take your children into today’s airports is combining two polar opposite forces that will never ever go together: patience and children.

Put a rambunctious, energetic toddler in a situation that requires a metric TON of patience for a regular adult (i.e. security lines, long, turbulent flights, baggage claim, etc.) and you have yourself the definition of a no good, very bad day.

But here’s the good news: I’ve made every fatal mistake in the book. By learning from my experience, I can help your travels be less stressful. Here are some of my most important Do’s and Don’ts of plane travel with small children.

Do:

Ditch the diaper bag and carry a backpack. This is the simplest, most secure way to carry your belongings while keeping your hands free to corral children. Backpacks come with an infinite amount of pockets and side pockets for bottles and binkies, sippies and sandwiches. Plus, many of them come with a padded space for electronics (iPad, DVD player, computer, etc) which, let’s face it, are essential tools for keeping little ones entertained. And trust me, your back and shoulders will thank you. Also, bring a light jacket with pockets. On the plane this can serve as a blanket or pillow and because you are the parent, (and therefore the travel Sherpa) the more pockets, the more better.

Don’t:

Obsess over all the worst case scenarios. Yes, they may scream the whole way because their ears won’t pop. Yes, the whole plane might give you dirty, judgmental looks. Yes, you might have to change a squirming toddler’s poopy diaper in a tiny, smelly bathroom on a changing table that’s barely big enough for a premature, baby kitten. Yes, your lap child may keep kicking the seat in front of you which will earn you several nasty glares from a frustrated business man. In fact, all those things will probably happen. And yes, they will suck. But don’t think about it too much. Because it will be over soon, and you will survive. I promise. (Plus, kids are like dogs, they can smell fear.)

Do:

Pack lots of snacks that don’t require utensils, liquids or have a high drip or squish factor (i.e. some fruits). Bring empty sippy cups for drinks on the plane. If you have to carry breast milk or formula, forget the cooler and bring them frozen in their containers and put them in zip lock bags. This will save space and protect your things against possible leaks. The flight attendants can help you warm them with water. {{Hugs to flight attendants}} Also, the sucking on sippy cups or bottles will help clear their ears of pressure so try to coordinate their drinking during the ascent, and particularly the descent when the pressure is worst.

Do:

Bring plenty of wet wipes for spills and wiping things off that fall on the plane floor. Because the only thing nastier than a plane floor, is the floor in the plane’s restroom. If you drop anything in there, you might as well slip it into a biohazard bag and save it for one of those red sharps containers.

Don’t:

Bring books. It’s tempting, but this will take up a lot of space and will only provide a few minutes of distractions. You will need something with greater sedation power. A favorite movie or TV show is best but not a new, never-before-seen one. I’ve made this tragic mistake. If your toddler is like mine, they will keep taking off those pesky headphones and quickly lose interest in a movie they cannot hear and do not understand. Something they are familiar with is better. They will know what is happening without having to listen and it will save you from hearing, “What are they saying?” a bajillion times. Pack older children their own backpack full of toys from the dollar section at Target. Don’t let them open them until the plane is in the air.

Do:

If you’re flying alone, get a window and middle seat. Of course your child will sit by the window and you will run interference with your seatmate, but it’s better than trying to get him/her to stay in their seat when they see an open aisle begging for them to run down. Also, be extra special nice to the flight attendants {{Hugs, again}}. They will help you get your own row if the flight isn’t full.

Do:

If you have an infant, bring a stroller with a car seat attachment through the airport and check it at the gate. No matter how big, they will pack up both of these things and place them directly under the plane. When you get off the plane, they will be there waiting for you on the jetway. You don’t want to worry about carrying the baby through the airport while also handling luggage or having them lose your car seat in transit. If you’re traveling with a toddler, and you still need a car seat but NOT a stroller, (although I would still recommend an umbrella stroller because, well, restraints are good) most airlines will check your car seat for free. And no need to buy a $20 car seat travel bag, most airlines will also give you a large plastic bag at the check-in counter.

Don’t:

Wear difficult shoes or attempt to drink a hot beverage unless you want them spilled all over your lap and down your shirt.

Do:

Smile a lot at the passengers around you. You might even want to buy them a drink.

Do:

Plan to leave your house earlier than you initially planned to leave your house. We all know that everything takes twice as long with children, but flying takes THREE times longer. And don’t forget to look for and use the family lines at security!

Do:

If you find yourself traveling WITHOUT children soon, and you see a frazzled Mom trying to wrangle her small child(ren); stop her at some point, tell her what a great job she is doing—even if her kid screamed in your ear for four hours— tell her that it didn’t bother you one bit. Trust me. She’ll never forget your face.

Don’t:

Let the exhaustion and hassles of traveling with small children stop you from planning or enjoying a fun, family vacation. Like parenting itself, it’s all worth it in the end.

Shannon Lell is the editor of Mamapedia. When she’s not working, mothering and wife-ing, she writes introspective essays on her blog because over-thinking is her special talent. Also, sarcasm. She studies fiction at the University of Washington and in her spare time (HA!) you can find her on Facebook and Twitter.