What to Do with a Picky Eater Who Is Already on the Small Side?

My kids are only moderately picky--they each have things they like and dislike but eat a few things in every food group. My 4 year old is allowed to substitute by food group (as long as it is easy to prepare like carrot sticks). My 20 month old would probably live on peas and string cheese and milk if I let her. I give her a taste of whatever we are eating and she will still try new stuff if she feels like it.

There are many books like The Sneaky Chef that have ideas on hiding more nutritious foods in popular kid favorites. Smoothies are good for that. The only one I do is putting broccoli in mac in cheese. If all else fails give him a good vitamin. My older one loves the gummy vitamins which may not be the most complete but at least are no fight.

My son is a very picky eater and has some of the same behaviors. If he does not want what we are having he always says he does not like it. I would not worry to much if the doctor is not concerned. Do not allow special meals. I make my son try everything we are having and there are days he he will miss two meals a day. I used to let him have a sandwich if he did not eat dinner but that made things worse because that would all that he wanted. If he misses a meal he truly does not like you can always offer the shakes after that. Good luck, I know how frusterating it can be. We weigh my son often to ensure he is atleast not losing weight.

i always try to tie the food into something they are into, even if it's a stretch. so it might be "this is the type of food dinosaurs eat. would you like to try a dinosaur bite of this food?" or "this is the type of food they eat in japan (if we're read a book or watched a movie about japan." my 2 year old is into turtles and dolphins, so he takes "turtle bites" and "dolphin bites." by the way, the food is not always the type of food that particular animal might eat, but i have gotten them way into seafood this way! and we talk about the difference between meat-eaters and plant-eaters this way.

Hi.
I have a picky eater as well. I have read several books on the topic, talked with the ped, and have gone to a picky eater workshop. The good thing is that they really all say the same thing about how to approach a picky eater. Here is what I have learned/done.
--You can only control what you make and give your child. You cannot and should not control what and how much they eat. So no forcing a certain number of bites. I let my child lick the new food and if she doesn't like, that's fine. Tasting and swallowing food is two very different things.
--Make a list of all the foods your child will eat and then place those on a calendar over a month so that you are not making food that only he will eat but you are making diverse meals. This was really helpful (include snacks here too.) Think about veggies like beets and parsnips...include everything.
--Always eat dinner with your child and everyone eats the same thing. I was eating with my husband later in the evening but now eat with my children. We all get the same meal. I do not make "kid foods" unless we are going out to dinner or getting take-out once every couple of weeks. A big part of dinner is the social side. If my kids are upset about the meal, we just talk about the day.
--Give your child jobs around the meal-set the table, sprinkle cheese, put bread on the plate...
--Once a child reaches 3, you can say, "This is dinner. You will not get anything else until tomorrow for breakfast." If they don't eat and are cranky, they will figure it out within a few days that they need to eat. My two are under three so about 30 minutes after the meal, I give my daughter (very small) a pediasure. Later, I set out fruit. If you choose to do this, do not give the snack right after the meal. You don't want to say that if you don't eat the meal, you get something else.

So it sounds like you are doing a lot of the right stuff!

I have learned a lot. It is a struggle each day at dinner time but I keep doing the same thing because I see small steps--she eats pepperoni, salami, black beans, hummus and pita chips, and more. And, she will taste a lot of foods and over time, she will eat them. She even asks to taste veggies as I am cutting them up for dinner. We have been doing this since November so it is slow, but I know it is the right way of doing things. You don't want your child to have negative feelings about food and you need to present healthy, diverse options. Stay strong through the process--there are nights I have to repeat in my head that I am doing the right thing. But my daughter gained 4 pounds this year and grew 2 1/2 inches so that's a victory.

Good luck!

Also, look into www.parentingplaygroups.com. It is in Falls Church. I highly recommend the parent workshops. The one on picky eating was GREAT!

If your pediatrician isn't worried, then you can lift the weight off your shoulders and not worry. Our seven-year-old is extremely, extremely picky and hates to eat -- been this way since he was two. The past few years have been so bad he's hardly gaining weight (although growing taller), so we have had the "I'm concerned" talks from his pediatrician. We've been advised to get as much fat into his diet as possible so he can gain, which is a bit strange for us since we're normally a Cooking Light/Weight Watchers household. Trust me, if you need to be concerned about his eating, the doctors will tell you and pressure you. It's definitely NOT fun when that's the case.

My son wasn't so much a picky eater as just not a big eater. His pediatrician told me not to worry that as long as he was getting the nutrients he needed in the course of a week or 2 weeks he would be fine and not to worry about him getting a certain amount of food groups every day. About the weight, my son was 3 and 21 lbs and on the 25% chart for weight and 90ish for height. This was 5 years ago. He told me that kids would eat when they are hungry. I know easier said than done to not try and make him eat. And regarding the percentiles for weight, these are averages of children, not necessarily what is healthy but just your child in comparison to other children. I say this because my friends son was 3 and 28 lbs and was in the 5th percentile for weight and 70 for height. So 4 yrs later he weighed more than my son at that age but was a lot less in the percentile. Kids are just getting bigger. If your son is healthy and they have ruled out any issues that may make him sick or not eat....don't worry about it especially if his dr isn't worried. Oh, and some kids are just going to be smaller than others. My son is 8 and only weights 58 lbs. He is the same height as his friends but not the same weight and weighs between 10-20 lbs less than most his friends. He eats tons of food too and constantly but he is healthy. Good luck and try to not worry. LOL as I think Mom's always worry.

personally, i would just make sure that he is taking a GOOD daily multi-vitamin. Even just a chewable one. Note i say good though, the ones over the counter at walmart and cvs and what not really arent very good. There is no law governing vitamins, so they are loaded with fillers. Your best bet is to buy online or at a wholefoods or other natural store. Not trying to sound terribly crunchy, just saying that would be the ones with the least amount of fillers that he would absorb the easiest. I personally by my kids vitamins online. I dont know if you comfy with that, but if you are, feel free to message me and i will give you all the info.

You could also try giving him protein bars as snacks. When you may him a meal he likes, take a part of it and freeze it or put it in the fridge you have that ready if he wants it.

Honestly though, as long as he is on a healthy growing curve, he is fine. He may just be a naturally small kid.

I second the multi vitamin advise, Flinestone's makes a my first vitamin it is great. If you are giving him good healthy foods and he is at least eating some then there really isnt anything you can do. I would stay away from the breakfast drinks they will fill him up and then he wont eat real food. Just make sure you offer him yogurt, cheese, and milk 3 times a day so you now he is getting enough calcium. He really will eat when he is hungry, and good for you for standing your ground and not making him a special meal. That has always been the rule at our house and it has paid off. Good Luck

Oh boy, I've been down this road! If he'll drink the Carnation, why not give him a healthier version of that? Skip all the emulsifiers and switch him to Reliv's Now for Kids - it's much more balanced and it's full of FOOD. Kids actually DO live on it - preemies get it thru feeding tubes, the company has feeding stations all over the US and 3rd world and for some kids it's all they get. You get great support from the company's distributors (who are really well trained on an ongoing basis) and there is a money-back guarantee. It comes in vanilla and chocolate, and it's delicious. It will give him all the nutrients he needs so that whatever else he eats is a bonus. Also, a friend of mine gave it to her daughter who has severe peanut & egg allergies - after 1 year, the numbers were nearly half, and as the 2nd year anniversary approaches, she's no longer testing positive for either one! You can give it plain, in milk, or mixed into a smoothie - a good way to get some fruit into your child. Since all our food is depleted anyway, we need to supplement (says the Amer Medical Assoc), and liquid supplementation is best (more absorbable). That would work well for your son anyway because he seems to like the liquids better than the solids!

Your child may have a texture issue - mine did. It was less about flavor than about how the food felt on his tongue. Also, it takes about 8 times for a new food to be accepted by a child. So if he won't eat it 4 days after he ate it the first time, introduce it again 4 days later. It's hard to deal with waste, I know, and it's frustrating. But it does work.

I also gave my son power-packed French toast & pancakes - I put all kinds of stuff in there that he never knew about! If your son eats a good breakfast, I can give you recipes to make it even more vitamin filled. There are also some ways to sneak things into the lunch & dinner recipes. I'd be happy to give you more suggestions so feel free to email me directly.

My son was also on the small side until high school so I sympathize with your concerns. He turned out to be a lot taller than the pediatrician predicted. But then again, I put him on liquid supplements so that could be part of it. Happy to help you more!