Not into Food

Stop playing your son's game. Don't pick up the food and give it back to him. Let him throw it and leave it on the floor and just ignore it. When he has thrown all the food down. don't feed him anymore--just act like meal time is over. He will not starve and needs to get the idea that meal time is eating time. Then an hour or so later start mealtime over again. When he is hungry, he will eat. Right now mealtime is play time to him, and you have to change the rules of the game. Just keep light about it, don't scold him or react--be bored with the whole thing, but never annoyed.

You are doing a good job of offering healthy foods. Stick to that and your child may learn to love his veggies. Kids will not starve to death and offering the "good" tasting foods just so he will eat will give you a kid who only eats junk foods. Just be patient and don't worry. You can try a variety of veggies, but this is a great time to introduce nutritious foods and let your son develop a taste for them. My kids both ate only "adult" foods when they were small and they make very healthy choices as older teens.

Dr. A. Dunev

1 mom found this helpful

My son did the same thing at that age. I swear more food went on the floor than in his mouth.

Maybe somehow you can get him involved in making the food so he's excited about eating his creation. Or even take him shopping and let him pick out a fun character plate and bowl set that he will be excited to use. That way, when he eats the food off he will see the character.

Throwing food is part of what kids do.

Check out this site... http://www.babycentre.co.uk/toddler/development/monthbymo... especially this part...

Grows more slowly and eats less

Don't be surprised when your formerly super-hungry baby starts to eat less. Between birth and their first birthdays, babies typically triple in weight and add 25 cm/10 in to their height. But between her first and second birthdays, your child's growth rate will slow considerably, and she'll start to lose her baby fat. Expect the amount she eats every day, as well as her food likes and dislikes, to vary.

I also found this site to be helpful... http://www.baby.com/view.aspx?pid=199&cid=192
especially...
New kinds of play
Around now your baby's play will probably start shifting from mastering his fine motor skills (he's got that thumb-and-forefinger grasp down pat) to exercising larger muscles. Some children this age have an attention span of two to five minutes for quiet activities -- though your baby's favorite games may not be all that quiet.

Your baby probably thinks it's fun to push, throw, and knock everything down. He'll give you a toy as well as take one, and he likes games where he can put things in containers and dump them out again. This works well with blocks in buckets or boxes and with pots and pans, which he can nest inside one another. He'll thrill to the loud sounds of those pots and pans banging together, too.

Good luck... Keep your floor clean, then the food doesn't go to waste. Give it back to him when he is really hungry. He'll eat it. Don't play pick up. Don't fight that battle. It isn't worth it and you'll lose.

Also try the recipes in "Deceptively Delicious" by Jessica Seinfeld.

Amazon.com has it for $16.47 at http://www.amazon.com/exec/obidos/ASIN/0061251348/booksto...

My family loves these recipes...

I'm not sure how to solve the dilemma but you could try adding pediasure to his diet. Maybe the foods you are making are too "adult" for him. Try mac & cheese, chicken and green beans. I seem to remember my niece liking those things. She also like baked potato.

There is something called "Poly-Vitamin" drops. It's a liquid vitamin WITH iron. Your son can be prescribed this. My son and daughter both took this. My 19 month old still takes it. Often times, once a baby is drinking regular milk & not on formula/breast, (and be sure to feed him WHOLE milk, as they need the "fat" content from the milk for brain development), they get low in iron.

For weight gain, try to feed him high calorie dense foods ... peanut butter, macaroni and cheese for example (it has protein, and the carb plus the fat content from the cheese etc). Just feeding low-fat carbs or "lean" foods may not get his weight gain up. Make sure he is getting in his dairy as well....although too much diary "can" interfere with iron absorption as I was told. Yes, I know it's not easy to feed an active boy, my son is the same way plus he is a picky eater. However, although he is not at a high percentile for his weight, my Doc says he is growing appropriately along all HIS percentiles and it is proportional. My son for example is just at a little below the 50th percentile for weight.

All kids are different. My daughter ate anything we gave her. My son on the other hand is picky. Also, at this age, they like to feed themselves. It does take offering them LOTS of different foods and it is not easy. Some days my son likes scrambled eggs, then a few hours later or the next day, he won't. Try adding "sauces" on top of, or on the side of whatever you are cooking. My son likes sauces and will dip anything into it. Or, give him "finger foods" which he can feed himself with if he is at this age of wanting to do it himself.

I know it's not easy. I struggle with feeding my son everyday too, but because he is a picky eater. I'm sure I will get a lot of tips here too.
Good luck,
~Susan
wwww.cafepress.com/littlegoogoo

I'm not sure how a 13 month old would even be able to eat filet mignon. And, I'm quite sure he doesn't appreciate it's cost. Try things that are much simpler and that he can grasp easily, swallow without a lot of extra effort. My two boys really liked things liked chicken drumsticks that had a handy handle, you can take off some of the meat for fingers, but leave some on for just knoshing on. Sweet potatoes are good esp. if they are in chunks and not mashed. Broccoli has a very strong taste so he may not like it yet, maybe something like zucchini or summer squash which is colorful and soft when cooked. I know that doctors can be a little obsessed with weight and you certainly want your child to grow, but loading him up on carbs in not the answer. He needs a variety of healthy foods. Cooking in cast iron helps keep the iron up as does leafy green veggies. As he matures and starts being really active, he will probably be more prone to eating. Inately, humans seem to know how much we need. At the toddle age, eating is pretty much a game. He will outgrow it. And, by throwing food on the floor, he is learning about spacial relationships which will come in handy when he is learning math!

Every kiddo is different, but my 11 month old will eat anything i put spegetti sauce on....try cooked spinich mixed with sauce...if not, try to melt some cheese on it! Also...if you freeze any of the yogurts in the long tubes, it taste like a popcicle/ice cream. good luck!

to prevent anemia, i still give my 17 month old baby cereal, usually in a sippy cup with a milk alternative (rice or almond or soy). Just 2 ounces of most baby cereal powders has 45% of daily needs. He drinks it 2 or 3 times a day. Or i make him regular oatmeal and add some baby oatmeal in there too. or make it like oatmeal itself. Also, unsulphered blackstrap molasses is very rich in iron. you can thin it out with milk, or whatever, and use it in place of maple syrup on waffles or in sauces or bake with it. Smoothies cant really be thrown and are a great way to sneak in tasty weight gainers like cashew nut or almond butter (also a good source of iron) or whole milk yogurt (make sure it isnt lowfat milk with fillers and thickeners like pectin or corn starch) Also, keep in mind that vitamin C is required for iron absorption, so make sure he gets enough of it too!
Good Health to you both!

Wow, filet mignon is NOT pleasurable to a young palate. Right now your son can pretty much only taste sweet things so the high end dinners you are making for him probably taste closer to mud that something good to eat. I am not trying to insult your cooking in any way. Little ones do not develope the ability to taste the salty, sour or bitter combinations that make a savory meal until the are much closer to 3 years old.
When my 16 month old daughter started to register low on her iron levels my nutritianist recomended Watermelon and replaceing all sugars with Mollasses. It worked within a few days and she ate every bite so she gained the weight. She is 8 years old now, but she still eats her morning rice with a tablespoon of Mollasses.
I hope this helps.
H. Stanley (mother of 3 boys and 1 girl)

Welcome to motherhood! :) All toddlers throw their food, it's a normal part of development. The good news is that they do grow out of it. I know it's nice to have them feed themselves after doing everything for them for the past year, but you may try sitting next to him and giving him one bite at a time. If I walk away from my daughter (14 months) for a second, she'll dump her entire plate on the floor.
Also, babies don't always like the foods that we like. At this age, they still like pretty mild tasting foods. Just keep trying different things (sometimes it takes a baby 10 times to try something and like it), and eventually, he'll be eating like a pro.
As for iron, try giving him Yo-Baby with cereal and fruit in it, or baby cereal every day. Good luck! :)

Wait until he's hungry to feed him and feed him yourself, instead of letting him feed himself. That way, he will not be able to throw it on the floor. At 15 months, he will be able to understand that it's not okay to throw food. Also, you could take away his favorite toy when he does it and say, "No throwing food". If he throws food again, say, "okay, no more stuffed animal", or whatever his favorite toy is. He'll learn.

hello N., I am a mother of a 2 year old son and he used to think it was funny to throw food also until I started making him pick it up himself. He hasn't done it since then. I hope this helps! Good luck with everything!

Gee, can I come eat at your house? Sounds like you make great dinners, from an adult's perspective. However, a 13 month old baby would not think it's so wonderful. Try some simpler (and cheaper) alternatives. In general, their taste buds are not developed enough for strong tasting foods like broccoli and steak (but mine are, when is dinner?) lol

hi N.-
my son is in a similar boat- needing to gain weight and not into food-- i have had success with avacado-- i am feeding it to him, don't give him the chance to throw it!! i say "look at the birds" and put it in his mouth.... slowly he is eating more and more, chx nuggets etc... at this age with low weight issues, carbs are good too they pack on weight-- i give peanut butter crackers, pancakes (which i make with milk powder and sometimes even p.b. to give protein and fat)... just a few ideas

Hi N.,

I'm not a new mom yet, but I can say that I agree with the posts about the shakes. When my brother was a baby (we're 18 years apart), he was a very fussy eater and my parents wanted to make sure he was getting all the vitamins and minerals he needed while gaining weight and still being healthy. We've been a Shaklee family most of my life and so they bought the Shaklee cocoa meal shakes and called them Shake 'Ems for my brother. He drank them all the time as an addition to his "meals" which usually consisted of a small amount of raw veges - all he really wanted.

Good luck, hope it helps.

Hi N., I too have a little boy 19 months underweight, and isn't into food. I have had some luck though, with trying to feed him different snacks, and foods every couple of hours, adding chocolate syrup (a little) into his milk, and adding vitamin drops into his morning cereal, and or yogurts. Our doctor gave us the go ahead to start giving ice cream, avocadoes, and any high calorie dense foods. I find that my son loves mac and cheese, and bread. these have a lot of iron in them, and he doesn't seem to get tired of these foods. I also bought pediasure drinks that are high in vitamins, and calories, and the doctor was happy that I started that as well. Today, he went in for his checkup and he went up 1/2 a pound in two weeks. My doctor was very happy. Also, someone suggested just having different snacks around the house in different cups/containers, near his toys that he can just snack on. Removing them an hour or so before his dinner time.
I really had to change the idea of 3 set meals and certain type of foods and had to just give in to what he will eat. I would rather have a boy that is gaining the weight and healthy, vs. sick and possibly have him listed as failure to thrive.
i hope this helps, and good luck.
D.

N.,

Try black beans. They are high in iron, tasty, not expensive. And fairly easy to clean up. I feed my 18 month old lots of beans, rice and corn and he loves it. I flavor it with olive oil and either lemon or lime juice and salt and pepper. If I've got time, I'll also add some sauted onions and peppers and some chopped cilantro.

As far as getting a toddler to not fling food? I've never found a solution to that. So I got a dog. We call him our Chihuahua sweeper. He's fat and happy and I'm not constantly cleaning food off the floor (I just mop the spots!)

My son is only now starting to eat red meat. Before this he wouldn't touch it. He does like chicken really well. So you might want to try other meat and protein sources. The filet mignon may just be too rich for him at this point. You can always add olive oil for flavor, fat and calories.

You may also want to explore food allergy and intolerances with your child. Many kids who fail to gain weigh have undiagnosed food allergies or intolerances. My son is intolerant to dairy and allergic to soy. Both give him a stomach ache and he gets really cranky, doesn't eat much and doesn't sleep well. Soy also gives him hives if he gets enough of it. I have a friend who's son was diagnosed 'failure to thrive' because he wasn't gaining weight and it turns out he is gluten intolerant (wheat and grain products). Once she removed gluten from his diet, he started growing and gaining weight. Food intolerances can also cause anemia because they irritate the lining of the intestines and you can have intestinal bleeding going on and not even know it. And that can cause anemia.

Oh, and in my experiences, pediatricians know NOTHING about food intolerances and food allergies so you'll probably have to do your own research and trial and error to figure it out. But if it is a food intolerance problem, once you get it figured out you'll be amazed at the difference in your child.

Oh, and give vitamin C foods (oranges, orange juice) with iron rich foods and don't give dairy at the same time. Vitamin C helps the iron absorb and dairy prevents it from absorbing.

T.

I think filet mignon is way to difficult for a 13 month old to eat. They have the teeth, but not the jaw strength. I know my son wouldn't have touched it...I would suggest you make more things with ground beef in it for the iron. Rachel Ray has a lot of recipes that use ground beef and are quick and kid friendly...

It may not be that he doesn't want to eat, it's just the type of food you're giving him right now. I know it sounds funny but certain foods may be too "big" for him right now. My son is 18 months and he has the same problems with certain foods. I think that sometimes it's the texture of the food that they dislike. My son seems to enjoy pasta...the tube-like ones more, since they are easy for him to pick up. I'll ground up veggies and meat very small and put it in the sauce so he gets his iron and other vitamins. Rice mixed with beans and veggies seems to work for me, also. We also have our son eat with us at the table so he sees how he needs to behave. It is frustrating, I know, but most times it's just trial and error before you find something that works. I hope this helps.

HI N.,

I don't have much time, as my little one is fussing. I know how frustrating it can be to get food into a squirmy toddler. THe best resource i can suggest for you is a book called "Child of Mine" by Ellyn Sattler. I was just reviewing it last night for my own kid!

Relax, keep offering him great food, don't stress, don't pressure him, enjoy your own meals. He'll come around!
C.

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S.

Hi N.,

When he throws food, he is done with dinner. I went through this with my daughter now 22 months. I told her we have to feed our bodies and we don't act like that at the table and I would put her down. I also did not give any snacks after that if it was dinner. The tossing food stopped within a week. Then after that was the second issue of trying to get her to eat more. So now if she only eats a few bites I ask her to take ONE More... and then let her be done and praise her for eating so many good foods. She is not a picky eater so I don't want food to become another form of "a control struggle". 4 bites of fish is wonderful for any kid!!

I also do lots of snacks. She has a small table and I always have a bowl (one of her fun ones) of fruit/crackers out for her so she can run by and grab something without always asking me. This has not effected her eating at meal time.

I also started buying the Moring Star Veggie nuggets and my daughter loves them!

Last thought, I have a friend who's son does not eat much at all. She makes smoothies with fruit, Peanut butter, supplements etc and he gets his special cup with a straw to drink them from. This has worked well for her.

Best of luck. Be firm, be strong and remember he will eat!
H.

My 13 month old has days like that too...I have started giving her a spoon to hold and try to feed herself while I shovel food in as fast as I can. As long as shes distracted and feels independent I can feed her.

HI N.,
Kids do through food. When they do it, they learn cause and effect. "If I throw this, Mommy does X..." I had the same problem with my youngest, and my pediatrician said to calmy say "Uh, Oh...all gone" and take the food away until the next meal time. He will not starve. He will learn, "When I throw this, it goes away" and it will eventually stop. As for the gaining weight. I know, if you take the food away he will not gain weight. I had issues with my oldest with the weight thing. We had to see a specialist because he basically stopped eating altogether. He said to take away the juice and milk between meals, as it has things in it that reduces appetite. No snacks, unless lunch and dinner are far apart, and if he doesn't eat at one meal, you don't feed him until the next. With no snacks, and just water to drink they get pretty hungry and will eat. He got his appetite back quickly and now at almost 4 eats a ton. He still is on water all day with occasional milk and juice, but rarely. He gets his calcium in other ways. At 13 months old, your son is way too young to have the meal you described. Look up more age appropriate foods. Pastas, small vegies, chicken. Much better on the digestive system. I also have a friend who has a very small girl. Very healthy, but small for age. She had to go on a very high calorie diet with the carnation instant milk in her sippy at mealtimes, and high calorie nut butters on all her snacks. She loved it.
At the end of it all, your son may just be a skinny little guy. My oldest sure is, but is healthy. If he has always been at the lower end of the growth chart, maybe he is just fine, and just needs a multivitamin and more citrus for the iron. If his growth has changed a lot, quickly, then, maybe he should see a specialist, or another dr. for another opinion. You also did not mention how he was fed as a baby. Most breastfed babies are much leaner than bottle fed babies at 1 year and therefore look like they are below average on the chart. The charts are made for formula fed babies, and breastfed leaner babies are no less healthy.
Also, write down everything he eats for about 2 weeks, separated by meals. Take it to his next dr.'s appt so they can do a claorie count. That way they know what you are feeding him, how much he is eating, and if it could be something else. The more info you give them, the better they can help you and your son.
I wish you good luck with your little one! :-)

Hi N.,
I'm not sure if you've heard of a fruit juice called Monavie, but it is loaded with 19 different fruits from all over the world. The daily serving would cover 8% of the daily required amount of iron, but also give him all he needs in the way of fruit requirements each day. I would also try puree foods for him until he stops throwing. My daughter would throw her food when she was done eating, but we taught her the ASL sign for "all done" and the throwing stopped. Best of luck to you!
S.

its just a phase. whenever he throws the food, just say "we don't do that" and remove him from the highchair, booster, etc. try again in an hour. keep repeating until he gets it. children will not starve themselves, they will eat when they are hungry. the best thing to do is to make sure no one laughs or acknowledges this behavior, because this will prolong it. when he does as expected (eats, not plays with his food) praise him for his efforts. it may take a couple days, but he'll figure it out.

My son was a terrible eater - weighed 10 lbs at 1 year. We had to be very disciplined about eating to finally get him to eat (we also discovered that he had some digestive issues). He's now 14 and eating! If you'd like to try a liquid multivitamin that has extra iron, let me know. Here's a link: http://www.shaklee.net/healthyfriends/product/20070

J.

What about smoothies or shakes with protein in a sippy cup with a straw. Bananas are said to be High in iron, bananas can stimulate the production of hemoglobin in the blood and so helps in cases of anemia. Also maybe you can give him a small bowl with some finger foods and then you can feed him the good stuff. Good Luck.

The best weight gainers are bacon and peanut butter which most little ones love. Other than that I would agree with the moms who mentioned gainer shakes that have iron.

Well, I have never had the food throwing problem, but I do have a 15 year old son that has always needed to gain weight according to the doctor. Does he throw his drinks as well? If not, one way that I have found to add weight is adding the muscle building supplements to his drinks. I also used pediasure when he was young and I still give him carnation instant breakfast every morning in addition to his meal. He is never going to be a big kid but he does have good muscle tone after starting life with weak muscles. I hope this helps.

Filet mignon is maybe too great for a little one. Try finger foods-cheese sticks, peanut butter and raisins on celery sticks. backed chicken. Look into fun shapes/animals you can make out of food. My kids loved mac and cheese with broccoli, as well as deviled eggs.
Did the doctor give you guidance besides just saying he is light for his age? Was it an actual order or just a suggestion in passing?

i totally know of your frustration of a food thrower .. totally sucks to make dinner and then have it all thrown at you or on the floor. i think my son just loved throwing his food - he's got a great arm so he could throw it FAR. my son is now 20 months old and i think he's done throwing. nothing i tried worked except time and giving him less to throw. i just gave only one or two pieces at a time. i know it takes so much more time to feed your little one like this, but it's better than getting pelted with an endless supply of food and watching it all go to waste. and i kept my floor very clean so i could give it back to him from off the floor and not feel too guilty. adding a shake sounds good to me too - my son loves drinking through a straw. good luck to you - i know your frustration!!!!

I just recently heard of mothers baking goodies like high iron spinach into brownies (and kids never know). Be cretive like that and stop the expensive foods until you know he will not do that. Good luck and God Bless You!

I had the same problem with my son when he was 16 months onwards. We were with my parents and we all turned mealtimes into FUN times..with stories and puppets where the puppets got to eat the food. And, we all ate together on the table. Sometimes we also used tv. The first few times he was spitting things out...but later he came to LOVE the 'drama' at the table. We also tried making the texture and 'taste' of food tastier. Using..butter and salt and a little pepper...with mashed rice.

Hi N.,
My son is now three and goes through phases of eating everything in sight to not eating hardly anything. Meat has never been on the top of his list. The few bits of meat I can get him to eat include meatloaf, tuna casserole, fish sticks and chicken nuggets. I try to buy the healthiest forms of fish sticks and chicken tenders and have even made my own. And ketchup for dipping always helps. While we never had the iron issues, I was concerned about his meat intake and tried a lot of different things. Steak? No way! A chicken breast? Not a chance. And it's the simple, kid-friendly meats he likes the best. Since he's still to young to really reason with, that's what I do. That and a good multi vitamin.
Good luck!