Help with Allowance

Hi T.:
We have 5 children all of whom are grown and gone with the exception of our youngest who is 17. We did give chores and weekly allowances, their jobs rotated weekly and they were paid on Fridays. However, in order to teach them how to manage their money and save we opened savings accounts for each of them and on Saturday mornings we would deposit a portion of the money in the bank; at the end of the month they could take some of that money and buy something they really wanted or leave it and save for a larger item. It worked and they are self-sufficient young adults!

1 mom found this helpful

I know there are many thoughts on this, but here is my approach to this.

When my daughter turned 4 and started the "I want that stage" I was trying to come up with the best way to handle not spoiling her all the time and giving her everything.

She has certain chores that she must do like clean her room, pick up her toys, set the table. Those are must do chores that she does not get paid for. If she wants to do "extra" chores to help me out, then we sit down and talk about what she will get for it(of course she is only 4 1/2 so this is easy right now). If she helps with putting clothes in the washer and dryer and helping fold the clothes and put them away, she gets 50 cents, if she helps with the garbage and recycling she gets 25cents, etc.

When she really wants to get a toy she can use the money she has earned to get it. If she doesn't have enough I will get the toy but she cannot have it until she pays me the right amount.

So far this has worked out great. I also make it a point to have her save some of her money. She has 2 piggy banks one that has Fun Stuff and the other has Savings. She has to put at least half into savings everytime.

I was brought up on a farm that my father owned and we had to work everyday from 4am-7am go to school and then again from 4pm-8pm then do our school work etc. We were never given an allowence or paid for the work we did and we were never taught how to manage money. 2 of my siblings have filed for bankruptcy and only because I had a great teacher/mentor in high school and through my husband that I learned how to manage money, and I am doing okay.

I think it is important to start from an early age and that way they know how to manage their money the responsible way.

This is only my opinion and of course my daughter is still young so I will see how it adapts as she gets older.

1 mom found this helpful

Hi T.,
My husband and I have done things a little different when it comes to chores and allowance. We give our kids an allowance because it helps them learn to manage money. Their allowance is given to them because they are a member of our family. I have money, Dad has money, this is their money to manage and do things with because they are a part of our family. When the kids were little we would pay them $5 each week. As they have gotten older we give them more and expect them to manage more. My oldest son is in high school and has a checking account so I help him learn to write checks and balance each month. Great knowledge for adulthood. As far as chores go in our home...everyone has chores they do because it is their responsibility to our family. We have family meetings and swap chores around between the kids for them to have a chance to help in each area. But all are expected to do chores. If someone isn't doing their chores, money will be docked from their allowance. When it snows, you can hear my kids say to each other....We all shovel because we are a part of this family. Occasionally we have chances come up for special chores with extra pay where the kids can decide if they want the job, one of them always takes the chore because they are saving for something special. Basically, we look at the allowance as a chance to train our kids in money management. So many young people get into horrible debt because they were never taught to manage money. Marriages break up because neither spouse knows how to manage money. Teaching your kids how to manage money will be one of the best skills you can teach them.
L.

1 mom found this helpful

I have always been told that allowance should not be given for chores, because at some point children will want to be paid for any additional jobs they are asked to do, and as they are part of the family should help out. With my children they are give an allowance and are required to put a certain amount aside to save. They put it into a piggy bank until they are ready to deposit in a bank account. The rest they are allowed to spend at their discretion, since it is their money they may use for whatever they wish. They also have a save jar for any big ticket item they wish to purchase. They are 6 & 7 years old and already have a pretty good grasp of looking for prices and what the can afford.

1 mom found this helpful

My mother gave each of us a chore that had to be completed each day. She had three. Every day I had to help clear the table and put the food away, later I had to load the dishwasher, wipe the table, and sweep the floor daily. My middle brother had to take out the trash every night, empty the bathroom cans the night before trash pick up, and make sure the dog was fed and watered everyday. The little brother had to set the table, put out napkins for everyone, go get the juice for breakfast and so on. When we got older we alternated mowing the grass each week and so on. We always had to put our toys away (especially the bikes in the shed) and pick up our rooms every night before bed. We had to make sure our clothes got in the hamper everynight.

Now mom would survey things and remind us one time. One time was okay, but if she had to say it twice or noticed later that we didn't do what she said...then it went on a chart she kept in a notebook.

Then at the end of every week she would subtract so much for every time she had to ask twice to do something and every chore we didn't do.

We got five dollars a week. We got our five dollars on Sunday morning. We got $4.50. We were give the 50 cents because we had to give 50 cents to God at church. Unless of course mom had to subtract from our $5 because of missed chores...(she kept a jar of change and lots of ones to makeup the allowance every week). And she was strict about the figures too. She sat us down often and explained that when we were grownup we had to work for our paychecks and if we didn't go to work or we didn't do all our work, we wouldn't get paid or we might get fired from our jobs...so no check.

She also got each of us a savings account when I was 12, Darl was 10 and Ed was 7. At birthdays and so forth we had to save so much out of our money in our savings account. At first we set goals for big purchases. While the money was there she would show us how the money earned some interest. As we got older our goal became college.
She would get us jobs during the summer so we could save half our money for college (that wasn't much when we started but it made us appreciate college more because we worked so hard to get the little bit we had.) We weren't allowed to work during the school year because that was more important, but every summer we got a job.

The other sneeky thing she did was find us really hard, crappy jobs. Talk about incentive to go to college. My first one was at a packing house, a big warehouse that packed peaches. I worked on the line feeling peaches, I worked the box line putting boxes on the conveyor belts, and I worked the lid machine that made the lids for the boxes. (my brother worked the box machine one summer) All of that in 105 degree heat...all day long (8am until 5 pm or so...or until 7pm if we wanted to make extra money on the clean up crew ...we always did) My brothers had jobs working at a pet store cleaning kennels, fish tanks, and so on...then both worked with my uncle at a plant that made big spindle machines. Now that was some hardwork.

In other words she convinced us to go to college with not too many words, but showing us things that were available for those that didn't have that degree. We all went to college. I'm a stay-at-home mom now, but I have a degree. My middle brother is the head of the computer department at the SC DMV. My little brother is the head of maintenance at a huge plant in SC.

To end I can say that all of us are hardworkers that have never had a problem getting a job or keeping a job. We all are very good with money. Me being the best...my family says I can stretch a dollar out of dime. But it is all because my parents (particularly my mom) showed us how to earn money, how to work hard, how to be responsible, how to save money, and just the fact that money doesn't grow on trees. (she didn't buy us a bunch of stuff even for birthdays or Christmas...we were expected to use our money and when that was gone she might give us a loan, but we definitely had to pay it back)

Those are just a few of the techniques she used with us and it really worked. (I can say honestly that my husband's family didn't do any of that and all the kids have had a terrible time with money..and some with their work ethic).

1 mom found this helpful

Dave Ramsey has a great program for kids and allowance, or what he calls "commission". you can get it on his website www.daveramsey.com. We use it with our kids and it is really great. the kit comes with everything you need.
good luck!
J.

1 mom found this helpful

I used to take my 10 year old son to a counselor for behavior problems. One the suggestions by the counselor is to do an allowance thing. However, it was for behaviors also, not just chores. IT HAS WORKED GREAT!!!!!!!!!!! I pay him weekly $5.00, for doing what he is asked and not arguing. If I have to ask repeatedly or the chore is not completed or he gives me fits, I take away a quarter at a time. The first week he lost money, he was very upset. I don't have any problems now and use it for other things also. IE-not wearing his glasses. It would be up to you and your husband on the amount and the expectations, but it is a great idea. What to let him spend it on, anything. He will learn quickly that money doesn't go as far as it used to. My son knows that when his money is gone, he has to wait until next week. If he wants something over his allowance, he saves it until he has enough. ALLOWANCE IS GREAT!!!!!! I say go for it

1 mom found this helpful

Hi T.,

I have been giving my daughters allowance since they were about 4, they are now 8,7,7. They have responsibilities to do such as emptying dishwasher, putting a new garbage bag in, bringing in the newspaper, bringing in the garbage cans and recycle bin, set table, help with dinner, tidy their bathroom. The jobs rotate weekly. Allowance is $1.00 per year of age, so $8, $7 & $7. They have been doing these jobs, to the best of their abilities since they were 4 also. They are not always perfect and do have to be reminded alot, but they do get done most of the time.

The allowance rules are 1/2 goes into a bank bag for savings that they each keep in their sock drawer, and 1/2 goes in to their piggy bank for spending or short term savings. (This is also the rule for birthday money and Christmas money, or any money that they receive)They have learned to save for something that they want like they all bought their own American Girl Dolls, some accessories and all 3 came home with money. They each donanted a few dollars to Big Brothers Big Sisters on their own. One daughter likes to donate a couple of bucks here and there to the animal shelter. When they want to buy something that I think is wastefull I explain that it costs 3 or 4 weeks of allowance and ask are you sure that is worth a whole month of allowance :)

Once they get an accumulation in their bank book, every three months or so, I take them to the bank. At the bank they fill out their own deposit slips and make their own deposits. The tellers are always happy to see them, and the bank manager told me one day that this was a lost art, that it is rare to see kids come to the bank anymore and do all of their own banking. Last year the cd rates were around 6%, so I actually had them open cd's and they earned about $25.00 in interest.

I feel like teaching them to pay for and work for something that they want makes them appreciate the item all the more, and will hopefully teach them to be hard workers as adults. Around age 10 I plan to have them start to save 10% for charity like toys for tots or the food pantry, or my oldest daughter's love, the animal shelter.

Hope this helps!

C.

1 mom found this helpful

http://www.payjr.com/index.html This site rocks! It is free he can make up his own chores you assign a value and it will tally them and even remind you that chore have not been finished.

1 mom found this helpful

We give our 6-year old a small weekly allowance. He has a chore chart, but there are certain chores that need to be done every day (like making his bed)and other chores that are only once or twice a week (helping with indoor chores). At the end of the week we look at how many chores he has completed and base the actual amount of his allowance on the amount of chores he completed (we subtract from a base amount for chores that are not done). We build in some grace (he may get his full allowance if he only makes his bed 6 out of 7 days, etc), but this weekly rhythm seems to work well for us.

Hi T.,

We give our 10 year old daughter $5 a week for the chores she does. Before we settled on the amount we sat down with her and decided which chores where do-able. She doesn't do things every day but does do things like take the trash out, vaccuum and empty the dishwasher. I just let her know when it's time to do something and she usually just does it. If she complains or doesn't do it, she knows that I will "dock" her pay for that week. Make sure the rules and jobs are clear at the beginning and let your son know that jobs are subject to change if it is not working out. Good Luck

Hey T.,

I have a 10 and a 12 year old that want to receive allowance. My dtr even went through the things in the house that she thought I needed help with and made her own list including prices for the chores. It went well for awhile then was forgotten. As of right now they do not receive a regular allowance but I do give them $10 here and there for being a good, successful kid!

I do understand you wanting to give him responsibility and time management skills. Those are very important in life! Ultimately, I think you need to decided what works best for your family and how much you think he should have along with what you can afford.

My husband even found a plan that teaches money management by giving the child say $40 a month and then the child has to manage purchasing clothes, shoes, etc.., along with things that they want like games, movies, etc. I really liked this plan however cannot afford it currently. I have found that my children are more choosey when it is their own money then when it is mine..

Good Luck on your decision! J.

I have a 7 year old daughter who receives a weekly allowance. When we 1st began this a while ago, my husband and I had differing opinions on how we should do this. He felt that an allowance should not be chore-based, that she should be expected to do her chores no matter what and receive the allowance each week regardless. I felt that if she did not complete expected chores, that her allowance should be witheld. We reached a compromise of sorts. There are certain thinge she has to do, no matter what (clearing table after dinner, pick up after herself in "community" part of household, etc.). For doing "extras," she gets her weekly allowance. Not sure if this is "right" or "wrong," but it seems to work for us.

I also do a homework/chore chart system with my 10 y-o son. For every day that he completes all of his homework and chores (and marks all off on his chart we keep posted on the fridge)...he gets 25 cents per day. Which comes out to about $7-8 per month depending on how many days there are. I didn't think he'd go for the 25 cents per day thing...but after I told him he could get 7-8 dollars per mo...his eyes lit up! I started out low knowing that as the years pass...he'll want an increase! Good luck! :)

I decided on a rather high allowance program, but here is why. I give my kids$1.00 per year of their age (ex: 9year old gets $9.00 allowance) a week, up to 10 years old, then they top out at $10.00, but can get more for doing extra "big" jobs like cleaning out the garage, mowing or raking yard etc..That gives me enough money to use as an incentive and to take away for disciplinary reasons. I found that when you give $2 or $3 allowance, my kids would end up in the hole every week which offered no incentive for them to work for it. They are required to make their beds, pick up their rooms, put away their laundry, do homework without a fight and when told, and basically just do what's asked of them. I have one child who does it all and deserves every bit of his allowance, he's 10. A 9 year old girl who does most of it most of the time, and one 12 yr. old girl who RARELY gets any allowance because she doesn't do any of the above.I also TRY to enforce that they only get to shop with it 2x a month so they aren't spending it every week and can actually get something decent with their $.
GJ of East Peoria

i paid my son weekly. i set up a pay chart for everything that he could do in the house, and i included "harder" chores that he could learn to do that would yield a bit more money. at the end of the week, he got a "paycheck" for all of his hard work. then, i taught him how to divide his money into savings, spending, and charity (something i feel very passionately about, and i don't think enough people teach their children). i also taught him how to save money for the things he really wants, and not to just spend his money on the first thing he sees. as he got older, the allowance amount, chores, and money lessons changed appropriately. fortunately, my son was really responsible and a quick learner, but u will have to tailor your lessons to suit your child. good luck!

I made a refrigerator chart with weekly tasks.
It was his responsibility to check them off and total his amount. He was a bit over zealous in the beginning, but it leveled out. Each job had a price. He was paid Sat. AM
IF he needed more money, he'd ask if there were jobs he could do. There are summer jobs and winter jobs. Snow removal or weeding. We also had a level of excellence that was expected. WHat was great is that I didn't have to keep harping about anything.

Figure out your budget and what you are willing to pay for each task. BTW, there are other things that don't warrant pay. putting clothes in hamper, picking up"toys" etc. That is where the leverage came in, I could also fine him.

It worked well in our family in more ways than I was realizing at the time.

T. ~ There are many ways to look at “allowance”. This is what I learned from my husband:

A child should be ‘ALLOWED’ <via where the word ‘allowance’ comes from> to do something IF / WHEN they have participated appropriately as a member of the family / household.

If the dinner is to be made, and they are available, they should help – <age appropriate> set the table, clear the table, sweep the floor etc. You wore the clothes, you want clean ones, you bring them down on wash day, you clean, you sort / you fold, put away…. You keep your ‘area’ clean and neat…. . Ect. Ect. With ALL HOUSE chores. These are things for the FAMILY~ all should help.

One who goes and shovels the walks / washes windows, cleans up the pets, picks up the yard, helps a friend or elderly neighbor THAT gets a ‘bonus’: ½ of bonus is for ‘saving’. When things do come up – “I wants” <go bowling, a party, a gift, etc> then it is discussed on how well they participated and should be ‘allowed’ to do or spend. Agreed amount is given, and HALF is put to saving. The children do not ever EXPECT to receive any regular money amount, just because it is ‘allowance’ day. Be VERY careful what you start NOW, it may BITE you when they are TEEN and PRE teens.

Best of luck.

Allowances are good things but can be tricky too. I have 3 children and here's what worked best for us. We made up a chart with things that needed to be done on a daily basis. If those things were accomplished every day like they should be then we put a check mark or star. If not then at the end of the week there was no allowance. The chores can be as few or as many as you want to add. Sometimes in the beginning it's easier just to have one chore and have the child put the check mark up so he can see his accomplishment, good luck!

We have a set list of chores for my step-daughter that she must do every week to get her $1. If she has completed all of those chores, she has a list of chores she can do to earn extra money and each additional chore is worth a specific amount.

$1 may not seem like a lot, but she has no expenses, and we are always giving her money for things she wants and her $1 is for her to save for things that would be important to her.

I think a weekly chart works well. Do not give work that can be done all at once. For example put things such as clear dinner table every day, if he does it check it off, if he doesn't he won't get paid for that. At the end of the week add up the checked off items and total up what was done,say .25 cents for each chore done and pay him at the end of the week. You can also add things that only need to be done once a week like empty waste baskets things like that. So some days he'll have more than one chore to do and a chance to make more money.

We do it on a weekly basis, and divide the chores into "have to" chores, liking keeping her room clean, taking her laundry up and putting it away, taking out the recycling... and then there are cash chores. The catch is that if she doesn't complete her "have to" chores, she won't get paid for the other stuff she does. Luckily we haven't had a problem with that yet. Good luck!

At our home everyone has responsibilities (chores) because we are all part of a family such as picking up your bedroom, helping with laundry and dishes. But extra chores can be done for an allowance.

a allowance is good for kids to have and learn from, but on giving an allowance teach them to save a percentage and yet let them spend some, they can see what builds up and how fast they can save yet can buy something they really want and know they have to save up for what they really want. I found with mine that a weekly allowance was good because they had a little money to spend each week and if they didn't spend it they could save it till the next week.

Hi T.:
Something we tried when my som was about 7 was to give him 4 chores to do on a daily basis. We agreed on an amount for his allowance (started out pretty low) and if he wanted more per week, we would assign him additional chores. How much he actually received depended on how faithfully he did his chores. If he did all of them every day, he would receive the full amount. If he skipped on one chore for two days, for example, his allowance was reduced by a % agreed upon earlier. He had to put his allowance every week into a "savings jar" and at the end of the month, he could use half of it for whatever he wanted, and had to save half of it. Our local bank has a special kid's savings account, and he gets quarterly statements, so he got pretty excited after about a year, at how much $$ he had in the bank....that is working for our little girl too, but she usually saves most of hers.

D. S

T.,

We are going through the same sort of challenge right now. I have 4 children (11, 9, 8 and 3). They decided they want to do chores and make up chore lists. My husband and I approved each list with a few changes. I created up a chart and specified which days certain things needed to be done. Like garbage gets taken out the night before garbage day for example. But chores such as vaccum their room or clean up toyroom they could do whenever during the week. All chores had to complete by Friday evening and Saturday morning each gets the $ amount approriate to their age. My 9 year old son is like yours and likes to do everything on one day if it is not specified different. I figure I'll take the help when he offers and not complain. They are keeping 1/2 and putting 1/2 their allowance in their savings account for our vacation. Hope that helps somewhat.

I agree an allowance will help teach the value of money. You should give him chores that need to be done on a daily basis all week long, not things he can finish in 1-2 days and then nothing the rest of the week. We give our kids $1 for how old they are, 8yrs old = $8, 4yrs = $4. We pay them on Sundays and it seems to be working. I notice they help out more even with things that aren't told to them.

There are a lot of different books on this subject. I am about to read "Raising Financially Fit Kids", and "Rich Dad, Poor Dad for Teens".

For now we have our daughter earn marbles. Each marble is worth about 35 cents (we calculated by a the number of marbles and what she wanted-a trip to Chuck E Cheese). We catch her doing good things, especially doing chores without being asked and reward her for that (I do not want to reward her for daily bedmaking, laundry away, etc). There are also other times when I offer her marbles for an extra chore I'd like her to do (picking up after her sister usually.

For payment I recommend "The Berenstain Bears and the Trouble With Money". It recommends that the parents keep the money and and the kids have a sort of checkbook. When he wants to spend it, you give it to him.

I would have a discussion early on about saving for something-what does he want that's worth a few months allowance (ex: DD now saving for Webkins).

Good luck.

Weekly allowances work for us. My daughter is allowed so much at the end of the month to spend on something and the rest goes into her savings account. She usually wants to put it all in her savings, which is fine. They have a bank at school program and once a month they kids deposit into there savings.

Hi T.,

This is what my husband and I do. We have a chore chart for our kids, it has the chores and days to do them weekly. When they get done with the chore they put a X in the box, at the end of the week we sit down with them and talk about the chores they did and did not do. If they did all the chores then they get their weekly allowance, if they did some of the chores then we figure out how much they would get for the chores they did and so on. I then give them half of their allowance and put the other half into their savings account.

Hope this helps

I suggest a doller a week for every year they are old, but at least 1/2 gets put into a savings account that they go with to open

Do you get paid daily at your job when you complete an assignment? If not then I suggest you pay him either monthly or bi-weekly, however you get paid. And dont waiver from that, make him budget, extra chores can mean extra money...ie a bonus, but no payment until pay day. I let paid my daughter weekly and if she didn't need the money one week, she didnt finish her chores, so I stopped paying her all together. My son on the other hand, they are 8 years apart, is learning that he has to budget his monthly income and that is does not last long. And he only gets paid IF the chores are done on a regular basis. I think it teaches him responsiblity and seems to be working well so far. Good Luck!

While raising my 3 children, this is the best allowance method that worked for me. After you and your husband have agreed on an amount (very important), set a weekly pay day. Discuss the amount, the pay day, and the rules for allowance with your son. Rules can be, no partial payments-it's all or nothing--a certain percentage must be put aside for savings, a percentage must be put aside for giving, and the percentage left for him to spend, etc. This teaches important life lessons--don't feel guilty for teaching him quality characteristics by having control over his money. On your chart leave a blank column for "write ins". Perhaps each write-in can equal 25 cents extra. A write in is a chore he does on his own because he sees it needs to be done and that he would be helping someone by doing it. Examples, folding towels, drying dishes, picking up and/or organizing toys for his brother, etc. You might want to discuss the write-ins though so he's not up on the roof hammering down a loose shingle! Hope this helps. My children are 33, 27 and 25--I have 6 grands!

Giving him an allowance is a good idea, it teaches him that if he want something he has to work for it. Giving him an allowance once a week is good and also give him a piggy bank to teach him how to save some of his money and have him think of something that he really wants so he can save for it.

Hi T.,
I love the different views, approaches and amounts when it comes to an allowance. I'll share what I've done, you can tweek to fit your family. Definately weekly paid day tho, monthly is too far for kids.

I printed a sheet for each child, morning "to-do's" (more so I wouldn't have to say 100X "brush your teeth"), after school chores (which were all household/homework/reading), and evening "to-do's (backpack at front door, sports necessities for am, etc). It listed Mon/Fri at the top, and I put these in a sheet protector and taped them up. They use a dry erase to X off as they complete them. Them when payday rolls around, we have a "ledger" for that too. They are allowed to keep 50%, (whatever you decide), 10% to tithe, 40% goes directly in their savings (teach them to pay themselves first). Now of their 50%, they have to save to a certain dollar amount before they are allowed to spend. This way they can't just spend it the day they get it on candy. Once they have reached a dollar amount (usually only 3 weeks worth), they are excited to have enough to buy something "real". As far as their band savings account, I gave this to my first child upon high school graduation, he was able to use it for college expenses. My other two are still under 18.

Good luck and have fun with this.

L.

T.,

We want our kids to learn that money is something earned not given away so we have our kids sign a chore log and at the end of the month we pay them .35/day (1 chore a day). It amounts to about $10/month if they complete all their chores. It really seems to be working well for our family!

There is nothing wrong with getting an allowance. He must understand that some things he has to do without compensation like you and dad...ie. brushing teeth, making the bed, picking up his room, etc. All the other chores like taking out trash, shoveling, raking, lawn work, cleaning basement or garage, putting his laundry away, etc. He'll learn that some things we have to do in life without compensation and pay is for other things. He'll grow up being a good man, husband, etc.

T.,

I know that my kids are a lot younger than you're son, but I do allowance. My kids have to hang up their coats and clear their plates from dinner with out getting paid. But if they help do chores around the house like sweep the kitchen and bathroom or clean their rooms, put away their clothes they get an allowance. I don't give them much. I have an allowance cup and each night they can get money if they do extra things. I usually give them 5 pennies for cleaning their rooms and a quarter for sweeping. i also know that it's not going to be perfect and that when they get older they will be able to do more and want more money, but for now they seem to be happy with it. My sister has a bank account for her kids and when my 3 y/o nephew gets his allowance he has to take half of it to the bank, that way he is not even tempted to spend that money. My kids are 3 and 5, but they can do different things like help take out the recycle and help wash windows. my 5y/o is the biggest helper, he will come up to me and ask to do these things. My daughter loves to fold clothes so that is the biggest chore she does besides the recycle and windows. Good luck.
B.