3 Yr. Old and Nap Time..

Updated on November 11, 2008
M.F. asks from Fairfield, CA
17 answers

My son is 3 years old and use to have a nice schedule for nap time when i use to work. Now i am a SAHM and some days he takes naps and some days he doesn't! On days he takes naps it's really late and usually sleeps for 3 hours! I want to try to get him on a early nap time routine so he can get to bed early at night also! We struggle at any time to go to sleep, usually i let him watch his favorite dvd and let him fall asleep to that, but that takes at least 1 hour for him to get tired and fall asleep! Should i just eliminate the t.v. time at sleep time? It's really hard to deal with him when he's screaming for his fav. dvd especially when i'm 6 months prego with our second child, i'm tired enough already and just want to lay down and go to sleep. Please help, need to change his routine and also get him to fall asleep faster without any hassle! Thank you

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K.V.

answers from San Francisco on

It sounds like he just doesn't need to be napping anymore. My daughter gave up naps and is a 12-up 12-down kid. Goes to bed around 7:30 and is up around 7:30. Many kids this age benefit from an afternoon "quiet time" though: try putting him in his room, on his bed, with a few books, or just a darkened room and maybe a flashlight to play with. If he knows how to tell time, put a clock in there and tell him he can come back out when he sees the number 3 on the clock (3 p.m.) He likely won't sleep but at least he'll "re-boot" -- and hey, so will you!
Good luck.
K. in EC

1 mom found this helpful
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N.M.

answers from Chico on

I'm also 6 mos pregnant with a 2.5 year old and a 1.5 year old. I'm fighting the same fight with my 2.5 year old. I think he's out-growing his need for a nap. Some days he shows signs of being tired, takes a late nap and then ends up staying up later. Most days he doesn't nap and is sleeping by 8. Days he gets a lot of physical excitement and/or mental stimulation, I can get him to nap a little earlier. To give me some rest, I put on his favorite show and sleep on the couch with him while he watches it. It's not the same as when he naps, but it helps. Good luck.

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C.C.

answers from Fresno on

Hi M.,
I think the important thing to remember here is that his schedule is something YOU need to lead - bedtime and naptime are when you say they are, every day. As long as you are very consistent with your routine, your son will do what you ask of him.

That being said, I definitely think you need to cut out the TV time before he goes down for a nap. I think they get way too wired when they watch TV and it takes them much longer to unwind.

With my daughter (who is also 3), we keep her routine the same whether she is in preschool or on the weekends - she eats her lunch at 11:30 and then she lays down for nap at noon. We keep the room as dark and quiet as possible (although for my older daughter, she used to like to listen to quiet music and that worked out fine too). I tell my little one, "You don't have to sleep, but you do have to lay quietly in your bed." Sometimes she asks to take a little doll or book to bed, and I let her.

The point is, you're at a time in your life when you need him to take a nap, whether or not he feels like it. Since you're the mommy, you get to set the schedule! Stick with it, and he will fall in with what you need from him. He will likely resist for several days, but soon he will see that you say what you mean, and he'll get with the plan.

Hang in there, and good luck with your little-one-to-be!

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M.F.

answers from Stockton on

I too have a three year old that doesn't like her naps. I would suggest cutting out the TV time. We also had to do that. I just returned back to work from being on maturnity leave for 3 months. My daughter too would take 3 hour naps (which is fine if she goes down early enough). I start it right after lunch and if she goes down by one we were good. Good luck and I hope it all works out for you!

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E.C.

answers from San Francisco on

It might be worth trying to separate the nap and the TV - if he *really* likes the TV program he might be trying hard to stay awake when he really needs to fall asleep. one thing you could try is a timer method - set a timer for, say, 20-30 minutes and tell him that if he can rest quietly for that amount of time, THEN he can watch his DVD after the timer goes off. If he makes noise, complains, whatever, during that time, the timer gets set back to 20 minutes. If he's tired enough to fall asleep, he'll probably fall asleep before the timer goes off, if he doesn't fall asleep, at least he's been fairly quiet for that amount of time. When I did this with my twin girls, sometimes I'd have to just lie down in the room with them so I could rest a little while reminding them to be quiet and enforce the timer rule.
Good luck!.

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C.B.

answers from San Francisco on

He may not actually need the nap every day, especially if he's now at home with you as opposed to day care where there's so much more stimulation. As for the TV to fall asleep, I would definitely stop that right now. The only room in my house that is not "cable ready" is the grandchildren's room. Kids should not get used to having to have the TV on to fall asleep. First, it keeps them awake longer. I've seen my granddaughter watch TV until midnight or later but the minute the TV was turned off, she was asleep. Also, you pay for a lot of PG&E to run that tv to play to a sleeping child! Unfortunately, it's a habit that you created and you're going to have to suffer the consequences that come along with breaking the habit, like a very unhappy child at bedtime. It won't change by itself; you'll either do it now or you'll do it when he starts school. By then, the habit will be really ingrained and will be harder to break.

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S.C.

answers from Sacramento on

maybe you could try just having him rest while yousit down and read a story or two at the same time every day . the dvd,s you could only use aas a special treat. have him play like jumpimg if you have a place for him to run around every day maybe him haveing a reaseon to take a nap would help. also some childeren stop takeing naps. If he does not take a nap you would have him go to bed earier. good luck .S.

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N.C.

answers from Sacramento on

Hey M., my son is about to turn 3 and we are dealing with the same thing. Some days he naps and some he doesn't. He is at that point where he may be outgrowing his afternoon naps. If you want him to nap do not put him down with a movie, unless it is just quiet time, it stimulates him. Also the time he goes to bed doesn't have to be early. My son goes to be around 9-9:30pm at night and is up around 7am. Most of my girlfriends who have kids the same age do this too. I put my son down for his nap, if he will take one if not I let him play quietly in his room or look at books in bed, around 1:30-2pm and let him sleep til 4p or 4:30p. That way he gets enough sleep , but is not asleep late enough so he won't be tired when he goes to bed at night. If he doesn't nap, he doesn't nap and he goes to bed earlier because he falls asleep quicker. Since he became a toddler we have been more flexible with his schedule to adjust to his growing needs and so he can be adapt to change without a fuss. So far it is working great. Good luck

A.H.

answers from Sacramento on

My little one stopped taking naps at 2 3/4s. She's four now. She does go to sleep earlier than she use to. Once in a while when she's had a lot of activity in the AM she'll take a nap for me. I can get her to take naps when we have evening plans by telling her that I don't want her to be cranky because she gets to stay up late. She'll happily take a nap then.

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J.C.

answers from Sacramento on

I think about this time my dtr stopped napping but instead had "down time".
Just put on a video for an hour and if he falls asleep great and if not when it is over let him get up and play. My dtr is seven now so it is hard to remember but it seems like she stopped taking regular naps at this time.
J.

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M.L.

answers from Sacramento on

Sounds like he is ready to give up his nap. Most kids do around 3 years of age. Take advantage of the time change. Skip nap and start a bedtime routine around 7. He may be grumpy in the evening for the first few weeks while he adjusts to no nap, but it is worth it. I didn't bother with the "down time in the room" for my 3 year old. That ended up being a daily battle. Instead, when my 2 year old takes her nap, I tell my 3 year old it is quiet time and that she has to find something to do while I get things done around the house. So she usually watches a video or colors. It was an adjustment for me to give up my daily alone time, but with the time change I put them down early and I am getting it back and with my husband!

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J.G.

answers from San Francisco on

My oldest son and I always napped together when I was pregnant. Everyday we ate lunch, had about 30 minutes of play time, then read stories, and crashed together. Instead of DVDs, you could try books on tape or cds. Some libraries have them, or you could even make your own.

You might want to check out "The No Cry Sleep Solution for Toddlers and Preschoolers" by Elizabeth Pantley. There's lots of good ideas about setting up bedtime and naptime routines.

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W.H.

answers from Phoenix on

YES, eliminate TV (and anything with an electronic screen) during the last hour before sleep. It wires your brain instead of letting you get sleepy & have a restful sleep. (kids AND adults)

Maybe try listening to music or stories on tape (you can read some of his favorite books yourself and record it?) instead of watching TV.

My son quit taking naps the week before we moved to AZ, and that was about 3 months before his 3rd birthday. After that, it was only sporadically or when taking hour-long car rides.

Not sure I can help on the routine but keep trying, it is important to have one - that said, it will fluctuate and change, every few days he'll crash and take a nap. Try waking him before dinner then being a little flexible but not overly so, with a slightly later bedtime. Or maybe a good run around playtime between dinner & bedtime so he'll have some energy burnt off for bedtime.

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S.S.

answers from Sacramento on

My 4 year old doen't take naps anymore. She hasn't taken a nap since she was 3. We're using "quiet time" with her. It takes place when my 19 month old is taking her nap. During "quiet time" my 4 year old plays quietly in her room. If she falls asleep, great! If not, she gets time for herself, away from her sister and she can read books or play with any of the toys in her room.

Good luck! I hope you find something that works for you and your son!

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L.S.

answers from Sacramento on

You have some great responses and I agree about no TV right before nap, a quiet book and cuddle is better. Get a digital clock so he can see the numbers and let him know where the clock has to be before he may get out of bed, that worked for me with both my boys, now 5 1/2 and 4. Sometimes by boys nap, sometimes they don't but they know they have to be in their room and rest, look at a book, whatever, but not get up until that time. I would not allow the 3 hour naps anymore, wake him up gently after 1 1/2 hours to assure a good bedtime at night. Good luck and get some rest!

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K.V.

answers from San Francisco on

I agree, this is a common age for kids to stop napping & of course, not something you want to happen, esp. when you're pregnant & in need of naps yourself! Like the others have said, see if you can institute a 'quiet time' of staying in bed for an hour while looking at books. But you may want to have it earlier in the day in case he does fall asleep. Our boys are 4.5 yrs apart so our oldest was totally done/w napping while I was pregnant but what I did was he watched a movie quietly for an hour while I napped in our room which is right by the TV. He knew to watch &/or play quietly. I only needed about 15-30 mins max to feel rejuvinated. The perk of no naps is an earlier bed time! When our oldest stopped napping at 3yrs, he started going to bed by 8p & when our 3.5 yr old stopped (at just over 2!!!) he started going to bed by 7-7:30p & still does depending on how active he was during the day. I think you just kinda gotta roll w/the punches. Make sure to stick to a bed time routine or get one in place before you have the new baby in 3 months. I suggest you do it now so that you're not trying a new routine while he's adjusting to a new sibling & you're dealing w/a new baby. Best of luck!

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S.B.

answers from Sacramento on

It sounds like he's done with naps.

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