Hi all. I need some advice about how to handle a situation. We are living with my in-laws right now and they have 3 cats. The two male cats arent a problem, but the female cat has been scratching my 8 month old son. He is crawling now so he is exploring everywhere, but the cat is in heat and for some reason she is really interested in the baby (always wanting to be next to him and if she sees him crawling she always goes up to him). Well..it wouldnt be a problem except for the fact that my little man loves to pull hair! So, naturally when the cat is next to him, he grabs her fur and she hisses and scratches him. He has scratches on his cheek, by his eye, and on the sides of his head. I am going crazy because I dont know what to do. They (the in-laws) dont seem to be very worried about the whole thing and dont seem willing to do anything about the cat. Also, its not just my son, the cat has scratched my 2 1/2 yr old daughter many time before too. I want so much to see the cat gone, but it's not MY cat to decide that about. They say they want to get it fixed and declawed but dont have the money. But, that doesnt help us right now. I try to keep the cat locked up in a bedroom and keep her as far from my son as possible, but it seems like people always end up letting her out and then we have another incident. I just dont know what to do. It drives me crazy seeing my baby with all the scratches and Im worried about infection and stuff. I am taking care of the scratches with soap and water & peroxide (is this enough??). Please..any advice would be so appreciated. Thanks!!
**I would get the cat declawed myself to help out, but we are a one-income family of 4 right now so, spending money on an animal that's not technically ours is not really possible right now :/
Try a pop can with pennies in it. Anytime the cat is near the kids, shake it. I WILL scare the cat away and the cat will eventually leave them alone. If not a water bottle and a small squirt will surely do the trick.
Even though the cat isn't "technically yours" I don't think you could put a price on the safety of your kids. If they will not keep the cats separated from the kids, I think you'd better shell out for the de-clawing.
Hi, cats don't always no the difference between a toy and a baby. Since she is in heat she is probably trying to find some comfort and since your son is so small she is attracted to him. Many pet owners know how to declaw their pet themselves. I would suggest that you check with friends and family that already have pets they may know how to declaw them and then you would not incur a cost. If all else fails you could declaw the cat yourself there are instructions on line on how to do this without hurting the cat. If you are unable to do the above talk to your husband about it. Let him know about your concerns and how you are feeling and maybe the two of you could come up with something that will work for all involved. Good luck!
You are a one income family of 4, living with your in-laws. I take it you don't pay rent there ? So why don't you guys offer to pay to have the cat de-clawed? Call and get some prices, so you know what kind of hit you are in for, and just do it. The expense is cheap compared to the cost of a catastrophe, and if your inlaws are supporting you guys right now, it's only right that you ante up and contribute something toward the family kitty. (pun intended).
I have no idea what it would cost to declaw the cat, but even if it's $100.00 to $150, that's way cheaper than renting an apt - and it's way safer than having something happen to your children.
You could hire yourself (and your two kids) to go to other people's homes to babysit at just $5.00 per hour, and have the bill paid with only 20 hours of work.
You may only have one income, but when there's a problem, it calls for a creative solution. Don't say, "I can't. It isn't mine." Say, "How can I?" instead. And make it happen.
Okay, first, whatever you do, do NOT declaw the cat yourself. I'm not a fan of declawing cats in general, but if you have to do it, get a vet to do it PLEASE. The risk of infection and other problems is just too great.
Some vets have programs where they provide low-cost spaying and neutering at certain times of the year -- do a Google search to see what you can find, and also try your local SPCA for contacts. Who knows, they may be able to do declawing as well, but I think that's not as much a priority as spaying. Your in-laws may not really care, but if they don't spay that cat, she will be expecting a litter before you know it, and causing them even more expense! If money is really that tight, then maybe you could split the cost of the reduced-cost spaying.
In the meantime, you are the mommy of a child who is being injured by this cat. You certainly have the right to insist that the cat be separated from your child, especially while she is in heat and more likely to cause problems. She may need to be locked in a room while your son is awake and about, and I'm sure her howling will not be pleasant to your in-laws. But your son's safety is paramount, and maybe this annoyance will get them to finally do something about this cat's hormones! Good luck!
Jen, I need to clarify something for you to another memeber here:
I don't think Jen meant actually physically declawing the cat herself when she stated, "I would get the cat declawed myself to help out". She meant PAY for it...I think the last thing on her mind would be grabbing a pair of gardening shears and running after the cat!!
Jen, I would also check out Dave Ramsey's Financial Peace University (you can get the CDs on Amazon...I got a set from 2007 for only $10). He helps with finances and will be able to get you to a position where you can pay for the declaw.
You are right to worry...not to scare you, but my parents just went to a funeral last month of a man in his forties who died from an infection that started with a cat's scratch (sorry, but it's true...they can be pretty dangerous).
please have your child checked for cat scratch fever. I can be life threathening, from just a simple scratch. watch for any signs of redness or swelling. It doesn't always just show up at the infection site. My sister had had this twice, the firs time they were close to amputating her arm. It is very dangerous. you need to keep the cat away as much as possible. with her scratching so close to the eye area, yu don't want the baby to develope a vision problem from a scratch. I'm surprised the cat is still interested - usually they will stay away from grabby fingers
Living with your parents (or his) can be very frustrating, but it is also very generous of your in-laws to allow you to live with them until you and your husband can afford your own place (especially if their finances are so tight they cannot afford to have the cat declawed). I think you should offer to pay for the declawing/neutering. The suggestion of babysitting is terrific. Lots of parents would love to have an adult watch their children to go out on a weekend instead of a teenager. also, with school ending soon, many families with 2 parents working will need day time child care. You could put up signs at the local grocery store and in the neighbors mail boxes to get the word out. Call your local pet shelter and ask about vets who can do this for a discount. In the meantime, check with your pediatrician to see if your children are at risk b/c of the cats. If you explain these risks to your in-laws, they may be more diligent about keeping the cat and your children separate. have you tried putting up baby gates to restrict where the children can play? We used to have something that looked liked fencing that we could make a nice sized play area in the house that kept the boys and their toys separate from our dog. good luck - I can only imagine how frustrating this situation must be.
I understand your concern! I also have a cat with claws who has scratched my 2 boys (2 yrs and 1 year olds). My thought is if the cat is scratching the baby after being let out of the room you lock him in is he is resenting your kids for disrupting its home. Cats are very territorial. I have learned to read the cats behavior to recognize when he is going to attack and try to remove my boys from the area. It is also important to teach your kids how to pet nice. It can be very difficult to live with a cat and kids at times!
Jen,
Get yourself a good squirt/spray bottle and fill it with water. When the cat approaches your kids, wait til she is close, then squirt away! Cats hate water and it won't hurt her.
Make sure you put antibiotic ointment on the scratches immediately. There is such a thing as cat scratch disease and you don't want a doctor visit!
Now, you need to discipline your son and daughter too. Each time they touch the cats, you must referee and teach them that they pet gently and never pull hair. This is a lifelong lesson you are teaching them so keep at it til you can trust them to be gentle. These are not the only animals they will meet in life and lessons can't begin too early.
I'm sure you don't tolerate your son/daughter pulling your own or a sibling's hair, so he can learn not to pull animal hair too.
Good luck. Let's make child lovers out of the cats and animal lovers out of children!
Try the squirt bottle idea - that may solve your whole problem. Next, please DO NOT declaw the cat yourself. This process, even done professionally can be traumatic to a cat; done wrong, at home... well, please just don't go there - if you think the cat is angry now, you have not seen anything yet (and she'll still have teeth). Finally, spaying may make a big difference; and if you don't feel you should have to pay since it's not your cat, then look at it from the perspective that it's your CHILDREN - and their safety is in danger. You have bought and will continue to buy carseats and other protective equipment for them - think of this as expense toward insuring their safety rather than an expense for a procedure on someone else's cat. If they are kind enough to let you live there while you get on your feet, maybe this just needs to be your contribution. Check with the local shelters and animal rescue organizations - they might be able to direct you to a low cost or even free option. Good luck and God bless your family as you try to work through this!
There is an organization in the lehigh valley that will spay your cat for free. I think it is called friends of felines but I would have to check with a vet to be sure. You caould also try the SPCA while they won't spay for free they may be able to direct you. The biggest problem people have with this orginization is you meet a vollanteer in a parking lot & they take the cat for you. This way the Vet who is vollenteering their time won't loose paying clients. Once the cat is Spayed the closeness problem is solved. Also she will need several days to recover & will stay away from your children. In the meen time get a good set of claw clippers. The scratching won't be as bad if you keep them trim. You probobly cut your childs nails once a week do the same for the cat.
Hope this helps,
Jeanette
as was said... they have organizations that will fix them... if your in laws dont want that, there are also organizations that will declaw them for you. in the meanwhile, cats can be difficult to train but i'll tell you what worked well for mine. she was a demon kitty, and we were trying to avoid fixing and declawing her (in the end we had to do both) but what reeeeeally improved her behavior... if i was doing something that she didnt like and she bit or scratched me for it, i would smack her on the head (not too hard but hard enough for her to understand i was mad for it) and i would not let her do what she wanted (if she wanted to run.. i would make her stay next to me) in that way she learned that biting and scratching will NOT get her what she wants. some people may disagree, as they believe cats should be left in their independence... but when you have young children like that, and have such a naughty cat, it generally works very well.
cats are hard to train... they're not like dogs that want to really please us, just keep in mind that when they scratch or bite it's to get something they want. and if you teach them that doing that will NOT get what they want, they eventually start to calm down a little. but i would advise first and foremost declawing and fixing your cat if it's possible :)
I know people will disagree with declawing... and i even tried to avoid it... but consider when you have a young child and a cat that loves scratching them, you put them at risk. until a certain age they are still at risk if they get toxoplasmosis (transmitted through cat feces, and they scratch their litter box, and then your infant and it can effect them severely and has even lead to blindness in some cases) so while i agree you should avoid declawing your cat if you can (it does NOT leave your cat traumatized, in my life i have had almost 30 cats at one time or another, ALL declawed by my family's choice, and it neeeeeeeever effected them negatively. it only made them easier to live with) but in the end, a child comes before any animal. and if i have to choose between declawing a pet, and putting my baby at risk... well it's a fool that cant choose well between those two. only other option is putting the cat up for adoption, and as much as i love animals i'm sure that's not even on your list :)
Definitely watch those scratches. Cat scratches and bites can become seriously infected quickly that will require IV antibiotics and potentially a hospital stay. Keep the scratches clean and if they ever appear red and swollen around the scratch take your little one to the pediatrician, emergency room or urgent care center as soon as you can.
Avoid the cat as much as possible. Good for you to try to keep it locked up just keep being diligent about it. As stubborn as cats are behavior modification techniques do work. You can buy a spray bottle at the dollar store and fill it with water. When the cat approches your kids you can simply spray the cat with the water and shout "NO" at the same time. This does not hurt the cat just startles it. Be consistant with the training the cat will eventually catch on. Soon the cat will associate the word "NO" to the upleansant water spray and your voice will be enough to deter the cat from getting close to your kids.
For cat "training", we have used the water bottle that someone suggested. We also use empty soda cans with a few coins in it (we have a bunch that we keep all over the house). When the cats are misbehaving we shake the can and say loudly and firmly "no". They hate the noise of the can. Sometimes clapping loudly while saying no will work also. Here's another thought- my cats are a bit "jealous" of the baby b/c they are not getting as much attention as they used to before she arrived, so I find they will hang out around the baby hoping to get attention themselves. Make sure that the cats are being played with and recieving adequate attention (whatever they like, whether it's playing, cuddling, etc.). Good luck!
If I were you, I'd be seriously concerned/worried about the baby and your toddler around that cat! I would keep putting peroxide on the cuts, but also Neosporin....or some type of antibiotic ointment...several times per day. My inlaws have a very nasty cat also, although we don't live with them. I don't even want to remember how many times that cat has attacked and scratched/bitten one of my kids. My husband has witnessed several of these incidents and the kids don't have to even be all that close to the cat, and she will go berserk and attack for no apparent reason. I know people love their cats...and all about animal lovers....I am an animal lover myself....but when an "animal" decides to start physically harming your baby or toddler....that is a whole different matter! If you can't keep that cat locked up away from your kids...I would NOT let the baby crawl around when the cat is in the room...get up and leave and take the baby with you...or scare the cat and shew her out of the room. It is obvious that this animal can't be trusted...and you don't want to risk having your baby get scratched in the eye, or getting scratched deeply enough to leave a scar on his face! I'm sorry for your situation....I'm sure this has put a lot of stress on you. :-(