Tired of being tired.

Health & Medical Other Health & Medical
1

OK so maybe this is a dumb question but I am tired all the time and I have been making excuses for it for a while but I am willing to consider that something else might be going on.

Here are some of the specifics.

I am 34 years old, I stay at home with 3 boys ages 4, 2.5 & 6 months. The baby usually gets up at night but just one time and only for about 15 minutes and I am usually back asleep within 10 or 15 minutes so while my sleep is being interrupted I am getting at least 7 hours each night and more than that quite often. That being said I always wake up wanting more sleep.

I eat very well although I should probably track my calories to make sure I am eating enough. I have about 15 lbs. to lose to get back to my pre-pregnancy weight which is in the healthy range so I wasn't overweight when I got pregnant.

I don't over do things so I don't feel like it is that I am expecting to be able to do too much. I am good at saying No so it isn't that I am over comitting to a lot of things.

I have started going back to the gym but sometimes during the day I am just so tired that I don't go. When I get really tired is when I lose patience with the kids so sometimes it is just worth it to skip the gym and not wear myself out even more so that I am not yelling at the kids all afternoon.

I don't drink enough water but even when I do it doesn't make a difference. I feel like I have been blowing it off as post-partum stuff, sleep deprivation stuff or staying home with 3 boys but it seems like sometimes I should have energy and feel well rested and it is actually pretty rare that I feel that.

I had my hormones checked a few months ago and they were all normal including my thyroid. I stopped nursing about 3 weeks ago.

My husband is a huge help so it isn't that I am doing EVERYTHING.
He bathes the older 2 and puts them to bed every night and oads and unloads the dishwasher everyday. That isn't all he does but in my mind those are 2 big ones that make my day a lot easier. And we take turns getting up with the baby.

I have all 3 boys napping at the same time so I have a break during the day. But I guess by break I mean sitting down in bed and reading up on child development, doing my photography work, working on the grocery list/menu or other things that go with running the house. After the baby is in bed for the night I climb back in bed and just do whatever I want. I really have no desire to go out in the evenings. I just want to be in my bed and relax. Then I am usually alseep by 10:00.

So, that is all the details I can think of. Maybe I really am experiencing normal post-partum (though it has been 6 months) stuff and I need to give it more time. I'd be curious to see what you all think.

You guys are all coming up with good thoughts that I forgot to address so I keep coming back to write more. :)

I am not depressed though I did have a rough adjustment after this 3rd baby. I did see my doctor to get things checked out after a few months. I am defintely not lost in my family. I am very clear not to identify myself as only a mother and wife. Those are parts of who I am but not all that I am. I am very happy and almost obnoxiously optimistic. I see the joy and blessings in my life every day. I just want more energy to enjoy them with. I take time for myself every day. The kids are done and in bed by 8 so I have time alone and my husband and I also have time together. I put the baby down at 7pm and then my husband does the older 2 so I am pretty much done by 7pm.

I picked up some B vitamins at the store and am going to check out some other supplements to see if they help.

Thanks,
Anne

2

Aside from all the medical reasons you could be tired have you thought about the mental drain of having three boys to take care of? What do you do just for yourself? I know that taking time for yourself can sort of add to your stress level, but it is still important. After taking care of everyone else it might seem like too much trouble to take care of yourself, however you might need more YOU time. Just a thought. I'm sure the other moms will have good ideas.

3

Hi Anne, Just a thought, but do you think you may be depressed? Take the self-depression tests on the net & do some research. If there is nothing medically, be honest & get in touch with YOU. Are you doing things you love to do? Time for yourself? Or are you lost in your family? Are you happy? It's nothing to be ashamed of, I know I've been there.... Best Regards, Carol ( Also, check out post-partum depression, it can occur later on)

4

Your situation sounds pretty close to mine! And I too am ALWAYS tired. I've got two kids 3 and 2 who sleep through the night, but my oldest has a built in alarm clock and is up no later than 6:30a EVERYDAY! And it doesn't matter how late he stays up or how much we wear him out before bed, he still gets up at that time, and since I'm the sahm I am the one who has to get up with him. I too get my kids to nap at the same time each day in anticipation of taking a nap myself, but always get caught up using the time to get things done that I can't do with the kids awake (ebay business, laundry, etc...) And when night comes I plan on getting to sleep at 9p but usually doesn't happen until 10 or 11 because I get to chatting with hubby or watching TV. But even a 10p bedtime still gives me 8 hours of sleep so it's weird to me that I'm always tired too. I do eat pretty balanced meals, and never skip meals either. I think it's probably just being a mom, wife, housekeeper, referee, chef, errand-runner, driver, business work, etc... that takes its toll and makes me MENTALLY tired which in turn makes me physically exhausted.
I'm just crossing my fingers that things will get better soon. I should by stock in the under eye concealer companies as I use so much of it to hide my dark circles! I swear I've aged so much in the last few years :) Anyhow, if you find something that works for you (vitamins or whatever!) LET ME KNOW!!!

5

Hi Anne.
Have you talked to your doctor about having your Thyroid checked? About 5 months after the birth of my second baby, I finally couldn't stand how tired I was, went to the doctor and sure enough - thyroid was the problem. It's common for women to have "post-partum" thyroid conditions. It's just worth a look.

6

Hey Anne,

I hear you about being tired and still getting enough sleep, but feeling like you could sleep a lot more. I also read that you said sometimes you skip the gym so you won't be even more tired. (here comes the advice, but I'll keep it short). Maybe the gym is just what you need. When I exercise, and those endorphins kick in, look out! There are some mornings where I'm snappy and grouchy and tired and I think, if I can just get to the Y, I'll feel better after I leave. And it's true!

OK, other thing, how is your eating? I used to be like, I eat healthy, but once I started writing down what I was eating, I could see what changes needed to be made. It helped with the energy too!

~s

7

I have older kids(6&8 soon to be 7&9) but I was having the same problem. I started taking One A Day All Day Energy vitamins that I picked up at Wal-mart. I was skeptical that they would even work. but I've been taking them everyday for 2 weeks now and they have helped. I've never been a vitamin taker but I am now. ;) Hope this advice helps.

8

This may sound like a strange question but do you snore alot? If so, its possible that you have sleep apnea which could be a cause of excessive tiredness.

Also, are you taking any medication? I'd check any and all medication you are taking to see if perhaps you're experiencing side effects. Even birth control pills can cause tiredness. Don't be afraid to talk to your doctor about it!

B vitamins are a good idea but be sure you're also taking a daily vitamin that includes all the daily nutrients you need. Good luck!

9

Anne, there is nothing wrong with taking a nap when your little ones are napping, too. 7 hours of sleep is not enough during the night, especially when it's being interrupted. Another thought, why is the baby still waking up during the night? Perhaps if you kept him up til 8pm, he might sleep all the way through, and let you get an uninterrupted night? He might also sleep a little later in the morning (although not likely, since my kids never did! LOL!). Still, one more hour up at night might keep him from waking up in the middle of it. My kids had, and still do have, bedtime at 8pm, baths or showers right before, get up about 6:30, and when they were little they took 2 short naps til they were about a year old (usually an 1 1/2 hours in the a.m., and the same in the mid-afternoon, after lunch). By the time they were about 18 months they were taking a 3 hour nap in the afternoon, after lunch. They all slept through the night by 10 weeks, and except when they weren't well, or as they got older they'd have bad dreams occaisionally, they always slept straight through the night. When I felt tired and run down, I'd make sure I took an afternoon nap with them.

Also, the older you get, the less energy you have. I'm 36 and have three kids a LOT older than yours and I still need a nap in the afternoon, about once a week. There's nothing wrong with blowing off laundry for a day. Also, be sure to get plenty of sun-shine. If your house is closed up all day, open the blinds and let the sun in. Or if you don't go outside during the day, make a point of spending at least 1/2 an hour out of doors. It really does make you feel better.

Something else you might consider, allergies. Allergies can really drag you down, and even if you don't have sinus problems with the allergies, you could still be experiencing allergy problems, especially at this time of the year!

Well, that's all I have for you. I hope some of it helps. :)

Sharon

10

You may not want to hear this, but I agree with the mom that said the gym could be the answer - not the problem. I have 2 children (2.5 yr. girl and 1.5 yr. boy) and one on the way. I try to work out at least 5 days a week. If you can, go to the gym in the morning. I can't leave the house to do that, so I purchased some workout stuff that I can use here (treadmill, weight bench, medicine ball, etc.) If you can workout at the same every morning your body will actually start your metabolism boost before you even wake up in anticipation of your workout. Working out will also help you sleep deeper and therefore better (so if you're getting 7-9 hrs. they are full of REM and deep sleep). There are times that I am still to tired to get up too. On those days I take a nice brisk 30 min. walk (on the treadmill) while the kids nap and even that little bit is refreshing. Do take some time for you too. Go get a pedicure, go out for lunch/drinks with the girls, get a hr. long massage. I personally would try all natural solutions before I turned to a pill/medication. Good luck and remember all that you do is turning your children into wonderful adults!

11

You might want to have your thyroid rechecked. There is something called post-partum hypOthyroidism, and your symptoms sound familiar. I had the exact same symptoms after my second, and thought it was just plain post-partum, but it lasted almost 9 months. Several years later, I happened to pick up a phamplet at Parents as Teachers on this, and it matched me exactly. It's hard to get into an endocrinologist, but give it a try.

PS I checked out your website. Your work is AWESOME!!! The lighting is exquisite!

12

Hi Anne,

One thing that would probably help is getting the baby to sleep all night to solve this there are a couple things to try
1) make sure he is getting enough to eat throughout the day.
2) get him to self soothe himself back to sleep
3)make sure he is not over tired or under tired when he goes to bed.

For you I know you said you have all 3 boys taking a nap together at the sametime, but how about the rest of the day ??
If you have daily routine schedule going this will help. Also if you get up and get your day going start with a shower everyday to wake yourself up and then go get the kids up and ready if you have a set eating time for breakfast, lunch, snack and dinner it will also help you. Your 6 month old would take a morning nap if he don't already, you could have your older 2 have quiet time here where they could color or play with play do or something like this.
Then when they take their afternoon nap you could take one for yourself, if not a nap just a break. Just because you are a stay at home mom doesnt't men you aren't entittled to a break also. I daily routinr and schedule for yourself could do wonders, you could get your workout in even at home when the youges is down for morning nap, just an hour a day, you don't even have to do anything specific, even cleaning your house and things like this is exercise. Also going to bed at a decent time will help also. If you go to bed at a decent time, get your youngest to sleep all night and get yourself on a daily routine, I think your problems will be solved.
I just read that you put your baby to bed at 7 pm depending on how long his nap is and at what time you may want to try to adjust this. eating and sleeping coincide together, and it's not the amount of food taken in before bed, it's in a 24 hour period. I've had all my kids sleeping through the night by 6 weeks by adjuting the amount of food intake. Also it depends on what your child is eating now, you say you just stopped brest feeding, so does this mean you went to formula ?? If so you may need to up his food in take, a little more solids and a little less liquids. My daughter will be 10 months the 14th and she has 4 8 oz bottles a day and she is also on all table food, she goes to bed at 9 pm and she is up at 7:30 am everyday, she sleeps all night. Anyway hope you get some sleep soon and feel rested, Wendy

13

We have very similar lives. I have two boys, not three, and my youngest is now 1. Other than that I share your story almost to a tee. My husband is helpful as well, I had my hormones and thyroid checked, I eat right, get plenty of sleep, and I'm not depressed. I too need to get to the gym, and it is the last thing I want to do. I told my husband he has to start dragging me out of bed.:-)

I do have just one thought. I recently have cut down and have almost completely cut out caffeine. I don't know if you are a coffee drinker (or soda). I have realized that while caffeine gives me a nice little perk up, however, when it wears off, I am more tired and often hungry. It has not been easy for me, and I didn't even drink much, usually 1-2 cups per day. I have seen though, that it has made a big difference. Take care of yourself and don't expect too much from yourself. I am worn out with 2 boys, let alone 3.

14

Anne,

If nothing else works, I have been helped by a woman who has a unique medical practice. She basically identifies through blood tests imbalances in your personal body chemistry and helps your body to correct them. I went to her for the first time about six years ago, after I saw the impact she'd had on friends whose docs couldn't help them, or who couldn't tolerate available drugs for one reason or another. She is a Physician's Assistant, and an M.A. and works under the supervision of an MD, but she's extremely knowledgable, has had the practice since 1975, and probably knows more than the doc about body chemistry. Her practice is based in western medical science but incorporates more natural solutions. Many MDs refer patients to her before trying more drastic measures.

FYI, I went to her because my then-16-year old was having serious issues and I was stressed, anxious, depressed, losing sleep to worry, and exhausted. The lack of sleep was exacerbating everything else. I actually tried psych meds first, but had too many obnoxious side-effects.

Anyway, she starts by having you fill out a very detailed survey about your lifestyle, eating habits, physical and emotional status, etc. She then interviews you more deeply, based on your answers, and orders blood tests (from a regular lab). Generally, it is covered by insurance, but I had to ask my regular doc (I asked my GYN) to order it because of the way my insurance works. Copies went to both my regular doc and to this woman.

From there, she looks "differently" (more extensively) at the test results than a normal doctor might. Each item tested for has a "range of normal" (each of us has our own "normal" point, but labs use a range to allow for individual differences). Say normal range for a particular item is 3 - 11. If you have a 4 or 10, many doctors will consider it normal and move on. This woman says, "well, you are 'low normal' (or 'high normal'). It MIGHT be normal for you, but it might not be." So even though a reading is technically within normal range, she wants to check other factors to see if it's really YOUR normal (think back to the idea of grading on a curve, or the upside-down U curve in statistics - almost everybody is in the fat middle part! You could be the exception, but she wants to double check). Rather than look at results in isolation, she triangulates (double checks) a number of results to build information about your system. (I don't know if this is making sense.) So, for example, I had a high normal iron content in my blood. She said, "this could be normal for you, or you could be either taking in too much iron, or your liver may be failing to excrete it. Let's see what your liver readings tell us." So then she looked at my liver readings, and sure enough, they were on the extreme low end of normal - sluggishness that probably explained why I had high iron content in my blood. (I should mention that if she sees certain medical issues in the blood work, she would tell you that you need to consult a physician).

Anyway, she looks at a bunch of factors, from hormones to vitamins, to stuff I'd never heard of. If you've recently had a hormone panel, you could probably just give her the results and not have those tests done again.

From those results, she gives you a "program." To give you an idea of the sort of program, in my case, my program started with some dietary changes to give my body a break, and some supplements to help support my liver function, etc. (Example, for the first week, she had me drink a blended "cleansing" concoction of lemon juice, a tbsp of olive oil, and garlic (it also made a great marinade - LOL), followed by tea I had to brew from three herbs, and to take a liver supplement called milk thistle). She also encouraged healthy eating behavior that approximates South Beach Stage 2. After a couple of weeks, we moved back to a more normal diet (that looks a lot like SB Stage 3), but with some vitamin and mineral supplements and a protein-based drink. Eventually, I stopped needing to take any but the most common supplements (C, D, etc), as my system was functioning in a balanced way again.

The results of her "program" not only relieved the symptoms I complained about, but by getting my body chemistry back in balance, I miraculously stopped having migraines that I'd had nearly every PMS cycle since I was 19! I hadn't even mentioned that to her. I also overall ended up feeling healthier than I had in years - even though my daughter's problems were still full-throttle.

Here's the odd part. When I first went to her, I lived in Arizona, and so did she. However, interestingly, because she bases her diagnosis on bloodwork and interview results, she works by phone for most of her clients. I insisted on meeting her because it seemed odd to me to be treated by phone. Because of this, I know her personally and can vouch for her in that way. However, if you "go" to her, you will have to do it by phone. She now lives in California, but I still use her. You can read her web page here:

http://www.alternativehealthandhealing.com/

email: [email protected]

Cost of her service: $180 for the interview & follow-up
and depending on the blood tests ordered, up to $500. Probably most of this will be covered by insurance, but it depends on your insurance carrier.

I know this must feel "alternative," but I could tell you many stories of what this woman did for real friends of mine in Arizona. She just takes the time and does the thorough job of considering each person a unique individual, and is more investigative than normal docs have the time to be.

Anyway, I wish you good health and lots of energy!

Sandy

15

Sounds like you may have something off with your body. I would make an appointment with your doctor and have a complete blood work done and see what comes up. There can be several different reasons as why you feel the way you do and starting with the tests would be the best way.

16

Do you drink diet soda or any kind of soda? If so, cut that out completely. Try cutting All caffiene. Drink Green Tea. Try yoga. It really helps me to feel energized.

17

Anne,
I was feeling this way after my 2nd was born and the Dr. recommended that I have my thyroid tested. As it turned out, I am hypothyroid. The nurse who called me with my test results was dumbfounded that I was even able to do as much as I was doing with as out of wack my numbers were. Pregnancy does really weird things to your hormones, as you know and your thyroid does a lot of work you wouldn't think.
Go to the Dr. and have them do a blood work up on you, it may be as easy as getting your system balanced again.
Good luck!

Cyndi

18

Hi Anne,

It did happened to me after my second child, specially if you nurse, it took me almosty ayear to recover back to normal strenght. But I would make sure that your iron is OK, I am always in the lower side with iron and that makes you feel tired.
Make sure that you take enough good vitamins too, every day some of the good vitamins, not store brand....they are not well made, and it makes a huge difference. If you are ninterested, we have the best ever in our health and wellness company. I don't sell them but I am a customer and definetely recommend them!
Hope you feel better soon!
Mariana Abadie
www.MyKidsFirst.com

19

This may sound strange but maybe you should have your iron checked. A defficiancy in this can make you feel drained all the time. It can also cause headaches, dizzieness, bruising, and may other things depending on how low it is. You can have this done in just min. at a health clinic. They poke your finger and get a reading right then and there. Good luck