Hi. My daughter is 2.3 years and she goes to potty to pee, I can say she’s fully trained on this one. She usually wears regular panties already. But she refuses to go poo on the potty, one time she held it till it hurts, then we told her she shouldn’t do that, it’s better if she just go. So, now she does it to her panties, and only then let me know that she did and asks to clean her immediately. So, ladies and gentlemen, any advice. What, maybe, just wait… it’ll come…? honestly, I’m tired of all that mess and wash her dirty panties all the time… thank you.
This is so so common. Here is something I found on the web for you:
Problem: Your Child is potty trained with regard to peeing in the potty but refuses to poo in the potty.
ie He takes a poo in his underpants or demands a diaper.
Answer: Your child obviously has bowel control and is very close to being completely potty trained. However; he is uncomfortable sitting on the potty and going number 2 which probably relates to constipation. Sometime in the past when he was potty training he took a hard poo in the toilet or potty and thinks it’s related to sitting on the potty and not his diet at the time.
His diaper brings him comfort and allows him to stand in a private place and bear down when he’s ready to toilet.
So what can you do to get your child comfortable enough to poo in the potty?
When dealing with any situation it’s best to have a plan of action.
Get Your Child To Poo In The Potty Plan:
- Talk to your child about pooing in the potty but NOT when he needs to go poo
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Ask him why he doesn’t like to poo in the potty
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Tell him that every body poos in the potty, mommy, daddy etc
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Explain what constipation is and why it happens
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Tell him that poo in a diaper ends up in a landfill and is harmful to the environment
- Take your child and show him there is only a couple of diapers left so he needs to learn to poo in the potty (keep conversation light, remind him your there to help him, if after a day or two it turns out he’s not ready then just act like you found A diaper this will buy you a little more time etc)
- Don’t create urgency and don’t create pressure
- Check his diaper and make sure that he is producing soft poo before you transition him to the potty or toilet. (Don’t want a repeat performance when you return to potty training)
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Pay attention to what you are feeding him and give him lots of stool-softening foods, such as whole-grain breads and cereals, fiber-rich fruit and vegetables, and plenty of water to wash it all down.
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Limit foods binders that make the poo hard. Things like to much apple, to much chocolate etc.
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When he is on the potty or toilet ensure there is plenty of support for his feet and buttocks; because sitting properly on the potty supports the muscles in his abdomen to help him with pushing. He needs a good fitting potty where he can plant his feet firmly on the floor. If he is using the toilet get a potty seat insert, so that he feels safe and is stable and it will prevent him from falling in the bowl, and don’t forget to put a stool under his feet for support.
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Get your child to lean forward as much as possible while sitting on the potty. This will help to open up and relax the pelvic floor muscles which must occur every time you pass a bowel movement.
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It could also be that your son has gotten into the habit of a bad routine. So when he needs a poo he goes in his underpants or you give him a diaper and the circle keeps going around, he needs a poo he goes in his underpants or you give him a diaper etc.
You need to wean him away from the bad habit of pooing his underpants or soiling his diaper by establishing a new bowel movement routine that involves the potty or toilet. Rather than yelling at him for pooing in his underpants or giving in to his request for a diaper, invite him to use the potty in a positive way at that targets the time of day he usually goes number 2 then give positive reinforcement by praising him for trying or when he has success.
Bonus Tips:
- If you’re child is afraid of the toilet take him into the toilet put the seat cover down put him on your lap and read a book. Flush intermittently to get s/he used to the noise
- Use hand cream to practice washing your hands
- Use bath taps if the toilet sink is too high
- Maybe your child has a genuine fear of going number 2 in the potty or toilet as he feels something is falling from his body. Follow steps listed above to help overcome his objections.
Drew Lachlan is the fun potty trainer and has created a Potty Training Video eCourse that helps parents become potty training experts in under 2 hours so they can potty train their child in under 72 hours pressure free.
Go to: http://www.funpottytraining.com for five free potty training videos
Hey mom,
My boys were the same, and they never had a hard poop.
What I did was have them drink a sip of my moring coffee,
It stimulates the bowels.
If you don’t like that you can always try oatmeal, alow juice or prune juice.
The point is to try and stimulate them to go, and pay attention to the time of day she is pooping so you can catch it before hand.
Have her sit on the baby potty because her feet can touch the ground and she can relax her bum, and muscles.
Sit there with her, til she goes, offer her whatever you can to give you a poop. I would offer them a trip to the ZOO, Saying I will give you a trip to go pick strawberries if you give mommy a poo. I will take you for a picnic if you give mommy a poo, I will give you Ice Cream, Mc Donalds, a Tea party, Chocolate, a new barbie, a dress, take you for a manicure , let you wear make up, take you to see some puppies at the store and let you pet them.
Whatever you can to keep her sitting there til she either agrees and lets the poop go or has been sitting there so long the poop falls out her bum,
For me coffee worked because it makes them go within 15-20 minutes of drinking it, and I would feel I had to go, which would remind me to take them to the potty for group bathroom usage.LOL.
The real key is just getting them to sit there until they poop. and remember The softer the poop the harder it is to hold it in. So try and eat softer meals that week.
with plenty of water.
And as disgusting as it may sound, I would let my boys eat reeses pieces candies WHILE on the potty just to reward them for sitting still til the poo came out.
Good luck
M