So my daughter and I went to do a little school shopping for undergarments. (we get new undergarments every new school year) So we started shopping for bras and she asked me to wear Push Ups. Should I let her? I mean she's Only thirteen?
P.S. Thanks for all the baby names! Ive decided on some>>> Korann and Kendra
As long as she isn’t wearing it with a low cut blouse that makes her fall out of it, I don’t see why not. Depending on her size, something with an underwire might be more comfortable for her…
I am with Tracy on this one, it is more about the outer garments. I mean come on, I can’t have been in the only school where we stuffed our bras in seventh and eighth grade?
I can understand a little padding especially for totally flat chested girls, but a push up bra is meant to create cleavage which is usually there just to look sexy (since it’s meant to be seen).
Not really appropriate for a 13yo.
Yes, mine too. She didn’t ask for push ups, but padded bras.
I really don’t care. I remember what it was like to be that age when "all’ the girls were developing and I had nothing.
Please try not to make it into a bigger deal than it is. This doesn’t mean your daughter is a skank or somehow too sexy for her age, she’s just trying to fit in, that’s all. Just make sure you keep focusing on all her other achievements, school, sports, whatever. Play down the sexy stuff and play up the REAL stuff, she will get it eventually!
Nope, nope and nope. When she’s an adult, living in her own house, paying her own bills, then she can go for ‘sexy’. As parents, our job is to say no to what we feel is not okay (and it sounds that way from your post, because you say “she’s only thirteen” , not “she’s already thirteen”.).
Would your mom have let you wear a push-up bra at thirteen? 
If so, what’s next-- and what’s left?
I’ll bet she’s got much more in her personality to showcase-- and yes, I’m very, very old fashioned on this stuff!
You are actually considering this?
She is 13. What the heck would the purpose of it be?
Do you actually want your 13 yr old to emphasize her breasts?
No way.
I would have laughed in my daughter’s face.
Does she have anything to push up?
I cannot imagine she would want them.. they are hot and uncomfortable and if you do not have anything to push up, they can fold in..
Or is she thinking about a padded bra?
Padded bras can sometimes help till the real breast grow in and look Proportioned to her body.. Also they help hide the hard erect nipples that are so embarrassing to teens.
I have to say, I don’t agree with purchasing something, because she wants to fit in. (I’ve seen that said a lot.) Push up bras are designed to enhance breasts. Make them appear bigger, create cleavage, make them noticeable. These are not padded bras to make erections less noticeable, or to make the body proportionate. They are solely designed to make breasts “sexy.” Do people really find this acceptable for a 13 year old?? I don’t. Thank the lord, I don’t have a girl.
Um, no. Tell her she can wear push ups when she’s an adult and mature enough for someone to actually see what it is that she wants to push up. There is no need for a young girl to have sexy undergarments if no one sees it but her, right? And at this point, no one is seeing it but her, right? For me this goes into the same category as thongs - and that category is “Hell no!”
I answered the other question about 13 yr olds and bras first. So… here’s my take:
They want to wear cute bras and matching panties so some loud mouthed girl doesn’t yell across the lunch room ‘here comes Susie, she wears granny bras and panties’.
In Middle school is when they have to change for gym in from of the other kids. I am sure you remember how cruel these girls can be in the locker room.
My not yet 13 year old daughter is, unfortunately, a 34DD. She has been wearing some kind of bra for longer than I care to think about. I have always gotten bras with modesty in mind. Even when she was wearing a B cup, anything that was heavily padded and/or push up was out of the question. She thinks it’s hysterical that someone with less than an A cup can buy a bra with enough padding to make it look like a B or even a C. (Hey Mom, here’s one of those bras that comes with its own boobs).
Anyway, we’ve spent so much time trying to minimize what she has been blessed with (or cursed with), that making her look bigger was never an option. Having said that, even if she had nothing to push up, a push up bra wouldn’t be an option at her age. My question to my daughter is usually something like - what image do you want to project when you go out in public? We choose modesty. You can choose whatever works for you.
When it came to something as personal as her underwear, I Iet her choose what she wanted.
I guess it’s up to you.
I wouldn’t if it were a daughter of mine.
Her body will develop in it’s own time and there’s no need to push things around to make it look like she’s got more.
When she’s working and can spend her own money on teddies, thongs, sexy bras - what ever she wants.
Right now she needs something that will hold up well to washing and running and be comfortable for everything a 13 yr old does.
Dressing to impress others with your underwear at 13 is just wrong as far as I’m concerned.
For me, it would depend on WHY she wanted the push up bra. If she hardly has anything to put in a bra and just wants to look as if she does, I would allow it. If she has a lot and is trying to get attention to that area, I wouldn’t.
I started my girls out on the sport bar style and after a while they pushed to have a “real” bra. Perhaps that is what your daughter may be thinking as well.
Okay, first of all, we want to wear push-up bras because we feel self-conscious about being flat chested and being made fun of for being flat chested. Girls at my school that are in sixth and seventh grade and have B-C breasts, and it’s outrageous! We want to look like we have breasts so boys won’t make comments and so we won’t look like we haven’t hit puberty. Wearing a push-up bra isn’t a big deal, it’s not like we are wearing lingerie! A lot of parents take it way too far and say it’s way too inappropriate for a girl in middle school to wear! If you don’t buy it for them, however, they will be mad at you, and you will of course not understand, as always… If you still refuse to get her a push-up bra because you don’t care or want to care about your daughters self-consciousness, then get her a sports bra, or a cheap bra with very little padding that will look like she has some sort of breasts. In my opinion wearing a push-up bra in middle school is fine, and you can’t hold your kids back forever and protect them from everything.
Haha! Lol1 Thanks for the comments they’re funny and very helpful! Thanks alot!