My 5yo has definitely inherited a lot of the spanish side of my husband and has thick hair, everywhere. Of course I'm not going to shave my daughters legs at only 5 or wax her little hairy back but her uni-brow she has going on these days is getting to be a bit much. I never thought about plucking or even waxing her eyebrows until I saw an episode of "Toddlers and Tiaras" where mothers of all kinds were shaping their small childs eyebrows. Do you pluck/wax your kids uni-brow?? Or, am I just making a mountain out of a mole hill on this issue?
Honestly, when I first read your question...I was like WHAT? NO!!!
But after thinking about it, you might want to do something......especially since she is getting to be school age. I wouldn't pluck it though, she probably won't like that, but if you do, do it right after bath/shower when pores are open so it'll hurt less. I would try one of those personal little shavers - they cost about $7, they have a battery and look kinda like a big pen with the cap on.
If one of my boys had a SEVERE unibrow, I'd ask them if they would like me to wax it. And just the center part across the nose.
But if they say no, I'd not bring it up again. Just say "let me know if you want me to and I will" and let it go.
My oldest has ears that REALLY stick out. He's been picked on about it. This year I asked him if he'd like to have them surgically pinned back. He completely took me aback (and pleased me) when he said "it's okay mom, I like myself the way I am."
I do too! And it will never be brought up again unless HE mentions it.
If my child had a unibrow I would pluck/wax in a heartbeat! I said that before I even had kids. I would not walk around with a unibrow; so why would I make my child. I say do it!
No! We're german/irish but somehow my youngest has a dark, crazy unibrow but she also has beautiful blue eyes and blond hair so it looks kind of cool. But she's 5.5 and no way will I pluck her eyebrows yet. It hurts and she's just a kid. Until it bothers her, it's one less thing to deal with. I honestly think it looks just fine on little kids. It's pretty common.
Edit: I'm shocked how many people say to wax it etc. She's only 5!! Wow. My daughter has never even commented on hers and she's a very girly girl. Hugely into her wardrobe, nails etc. But I think it's not until over 6 or 7 years that girls start to think if they're pretty compared to other girls. I'm fine with helping out when they start to care on their own w/ NO prodding from me but if the little girl doesn't care and other kids don't mention it, then like someone said, who is this being done for? Must be the parent's vanity.
I think that you are taking it too far. I think that she should first learn that in her very natural state she is most beautiful. She has the rest of her life to determine how she wants to look--form moment to moment, if she wants--but I believe very strongly that her foundation should be one of satisfaction and even pleasure with what she looks like and who she is when the curtain comes down. Obviously, you could make her feel insecure about things that she doesn't even think about now. Even more, you will be determining what look she will need to maintain, instead of letting her determine how she wants to look.
When I was a girl, I was a little hairy. My eyebrows grow straight up, and I never did anything about them until I was in my early twenties. In junior high and high school, someone was always trying to shape them, but I was content with my natural self. Once I got into glamour, I realized that they didn't go well with the look that I was trying to achieve, so I started shaping them. I tried different shapes with different looks. We don't have to have the "final answers" as babies. From moment to moment we need to be able to love who we are on every level, and that is so much better achieved with less external pressure to fit in to an ever-changing ideal created by others. My hair did thin out, and I just love the light fuzz that's all over my body. I shave my legs, but I don't have a fit if they aren't perfectly smooth at any given time. (Oh, and I am pretty good-looking, in case you are wondering if I'm just content looking like Frankenstein and King Kong had a baby.)
I have to "free the unibrow" every couple of months on my son. I just shave it off. He thinks it's funny. Takes five seconds and he looks so much better.
"Toddlers and Tiaras" would give an unfortunately slanted view of reality, in which someone's idea of physical "perfection" becomes the main goal of life, and that somehow, that's okay or even desirable. Physical beauty is fine, but to subject kids so young to the idea that they have to be pretty in other people's eyes is not healthy on an emotional or spiritual level.
Chances are good that that brow line will thin out on its own in coming years. If and when your daughter begins to fret, with no coaxing from you or her dad, about too much eyebrow, you can talk about her options. Plucking might be too uncomfortable for some kids, but shaving or shearing might be reasonable options. There are special devices that are like miniature hedge shears for removing excessive feminine facial hair that are non-irritating.
Please don't put that insecurity on your child.
There is nothing wrong w/ her uni-brow.
Like Jill said, it is very common.
By plucking her eyebrows (which would physically hurt her) you are saying: there is something wrong w/ you.
And there isn't.
The moms on that show are living on another planet.
And will probably have hefty psychologist bills to pay one day. ;)
I would not shave or "shape" anything on my little kid except if they have a unibrow. I would shave or wax my kid's unibrow. A unibrow detracts from a child's natural beauty to such an extreme extent in my opinion, much like a huge birthmark. But no, I do not have to groom my son in that way at all. He has lovely eyebrows. :)
From someone who grew up with lots of facial hair....leave it alone if it doesn't bother her. I was adopted and have some middle eastern heritage, my adoptive parents and sister looked very different from me, had light hair and very little facial hair. It wasn't an issue for me until my sister started making a big deal about it then I became VERY self conscious about it. This stayed with me until I was in my 30s and had laser hair removal. At some point she may want it removed, but at 5 leave it alone.
My own daughter has facial hair too and has never been bothered by it. In middle school we started waxing her eyebrows but nothing else bothers her. She is confident and happy with her appearance thankfully!!
My sister decided to pluck my eyebrows for me when I was in 5th grade (against my will) - it was horrible - she missed several times and got my skin while she was sitting on top of me. I didn't forgive her for years. Unfortunately she was babysitting that evening and my parents weren't there to intervene.
Unless it bothered her a lot, I would let it go and even then not wax them. My DD is inheriting my eyebrows, but it never bothered me til I was in middle school. I wouldn't look to Toddlers and Tiaras for parenting advice, personally. Let them be kids. My DD also has a birthmark that is fairly large but flat and there's no medical need to change it. I am teaching her that it makes her special because one day some kid is going to notice and make fun of her (or for something else) and she needs to have the confidence to shrug stuff like that off. If she is 15 and plucks her own eyebrows into oblivion, then so be it, but at least I'll give her a lot to work with before then!
That's so funny you should bring up this topic because my daughter asked--well begged--me yesterday to pluck her eyebrows.
Some background: she is 12, and it was not a unibrow, but it was definitely a lot of crazy black hair where it shouldn't be. She is Irish and Italian, so she has very fair skin--and black body hair!!! I felt so bad for her in the 5th grade that I had to let her start shaving her legs, because kids were making fun of her : (
I would do nothing at all, until your daughter mentions it. Then, as another mom suggested, explore her options. But I would definitely not approach her first, or she will feel self conscious. Believe me, other kids will zero in on any differences, and you can "pre-emptively strike" the unibrow, but it will be the legs or something else next :(
Not that it's all bad though; my daughter has come to embrace both her fair skin and her crazy Italian hair...it will all work out for your daughter too, I'm sure!
Get one of those Nair waxing kits that you heat with your fingers and just do the middle. But don't force her to do it. Just make the suggestion. Tell her it will hurt for like 10 seconds and do it.
I have been wondering when this will come up for my 7 year old - her's are very thick and hairy too. However, I would never recommend bringing this up with a child so young. I think this falls under the category of "it's her body" and if it doesn't bother her, don't create an issue that doesn't exist. In my case, I figure a time will come for my daughter in her preteens and teens where we focus on this kind of grooming, probably nearer to when she is ready to shave her legs. Girls focus too much on their physical appearences as it is, don't start too early.
But I implore you to never pluck for her - now or when she is a teen! I ruined my brows as a teen by not doing it right or letting friends do it. I wish I had gotten electrolisis,(*sp?) or waxed at a good spa so I understand how to shape and thin without looking tacky!! Brows never grow back. And this is all the more reason to wait. You don't know how her hair will grow in, and you could do more damage now. Plus she will learn to hate the whole grooming thing at this age. Bad idea all around.
I think question you ought to ask yourself is "what is the purpose of shaping my 5 year old's eyebrows?". If you can think of a legitimate purpose, then go for it. Personally, the only purpose I see is for the vanity of the parent.
If my daughters had unruly eyebrows and unwanted body hair that would certainly stand out id go to the salon with them and make it a "girls" day.
I mean technically a cleft lip is not really bothersome, just unsightly. No one would ever tell you not to put your kids in major surgery if they had that. I mean a little hair isnt that bad, but it is much more manageable.
Having so much hair SO YOUNG will get noticed and if i were you i would treat it the best way possible not to single her out.