This year my husband is currently deployed. It is just me and my soon to be 3 year old (next month is his birthday). What can I do to make Christmas morning fun for the both of us? Where my husband is stationed he won't be able to skype us in the morning. I thought of asking someone to spend the night like my little brother but not sure if he will come as he has a girlfriend and might want to be with her. Any suggestions would be great.
My son is leaving for Afghanistan on Christmas Eve. My DIL has a 2.5 yr old and has decided to fly to the philippines to visit family there while my son is gone for the next 6 weeks. Surrounding yourself with family is fine, but also teaching your 3 yr old that the two of you can be strong and do just fine while dad is gone is good too. You want your husband to know that you are secure and not scared and whiny while he's gone, it makes his horrible time over there much easier knowing he isnt worried about his wonderful wife and mom of his child taking care of themselves without him. He needs to know you are gonna miss the crap out of him, but don't make him worry that you can't hang while he's gone. He doesnt need that added pressure.
You and daughter will be fine home alone even if your brother doesnt show. Get lots of Christmas movies to watch and just play with your daughter. Get up Christmas morning and enjoy it. Your 3 yr old wont even remember dad being gone ..... it's YOU that needs to come to terms with it. Don't let life stop while your husband is away doing his duty. You know he'd much rather be home in your warm bed. Try not to make him feel bad about leaving... he doesnt need that. You'll be fine. Make him proud and make the other moms you know envious that you and daughter are strong, secure and proud of daddy and anxiously waiting his return. Do not mope and feel sorry for yourself.... that is the worst thing you can do for all 3 of you.
You can do it!
When my uncle was deployed, my aunt filled the living room with white and light blue balloons just to make my little cousin laugh and smile that morning. I know it sounds corny, but he loved it and she still talks about how the look on his face when he saw the living room and had to "dig" for his presents made her smile more than she thought she would!
The pictures are really quite beautiful.... tree lights on and surrounded by balloons with presents hidden underneath.
I second what Granda T had to say. Also been there, done that. This is the time where you can step up to the plate and do things that you wouldn't have done with hubby there. Start a new tradition that you and daughter do when dad is away. Hey make cookies, draw crazy pictures and put them around the house, make happy memories that you can share when dad comes home. Also go out and see the lights that people have put up and join in singing carols and such. Stop by a church or place of worship and or visit the unfortunate and help them give out gifts or something. This what we wives do. Also contact a few other wives in the same situation and have them over for lunch or early dinner and enjoy each other.
Before you know it he will be back.
The best ever holiday to you.
The other Suzanne, Retired Military Wife
Just wanted you to know that my husband is deployed too, and I am trying to stay excited and do all the fun stuff we usually do anyway. Can your husband skype you at night? If he is in the middle east, nighttime here is morning there, and maybe you could open the presents then?
I think you should do what you normally do at Christmas but maybe add a project of making something to send to your husband.
Grandma T, my prayers are with your famliy this Christmas. Deployments are hard enough without having to leave Christmas.
We have
Gone to my moms and his moms for an extended Christmas break
My older daughter played Santa for me for the last three years, My hubby and she corroborated on his phone calls and she went shopping with a neighbor, She is 15 this year.
I filled my own stocking with doggie bones one year
We decorate the tree with a huge yellow deployment ribbon on the top.
I went out and bought a huge white tree for all our Marine ornaments.
Put up a tree, decorate, make the Christmas cookies, go see Santa. Don't not do it because it's just the two of you.
We put together and mail in Nov the Christmas boxes with a little tree and trimmings, garland, lights. That was my sons favorite goody box while he was in Japan.
video tape your son opening Christmas
I think it is time to find some other Mommies whose husbands are being deployed and plan a get together for Christmas. It is hard on EVERYONE who has someone that is a central part of the family not be home for Christmas.
The present opening from Santa can be when someone else is able to be there. Please try to make it special for you too. It isn't fun to be alone when it seems that the rest of the world is with family and those they love. Please know however that you aren't alone....thousands of you are out there feeling the same way.
Time to reach out.
Take a look at this website. It is called a year with flat daddy. It is amazing what this woman went through to put her hubby in the midst of the family happenings. http://ayearwithflatdaddy.wordpress.com/ It is too late for you to get the flat daddy thing, but not too late to take a pic of hubby and put it next to your son and take lots of pics. Get the pic to Walgreens or Costco or Sam's club and get it enlarged to an 11 x 14 and click away. My husband, a retired marine, is working in Kuwait, so I know what it is like to miss him at holidays (He is a force protection officer at LSA 2). I am not sure when I will see him next but I keep a big picture of him near me always. It sounds kind of simple, but it really does make him seem nearer. God Bless you and your son and tell your hubby thanks from all of us for making the world safer.
Holidays during deployments can be tough. Fortunately your son is young enough not to have a good strong grasp on days yet, so I'm going to suggest what I did with my kids when they were the age yours is, and that is call the day you guys get to talk to daddy Christmas.
It really only worked with mine until they were about four, but after that we started doing other things. Like we have a different Christmas tree for deployments (this glowing white monstrosity I let the kids pick out), and the kids have agreed to wait on opening presents until daddy's around to see too. So if it's later in the day, or even the next day, they're willing to hold out just to be able to share that time with daddy. What gets me is that they came up with that all on their own.
Heck, one year we put off Christmas until mid January (Santa was very understanding and made a special trip ^_^), because that's when daddy was coming home and the kids wanted to do that.
Being in the military takes a whole lot of finess when it comes to every day life, let alone holidays. Sometimes you get that time, other times you don't. But you always have eachother in the end, and often times, that's all that counts. I do suggest lots of pics of daddy up and around the house. If he has a favorite cologne, spray that on a pillow or stuffed animal.
Just know you're not alone, even if it feels like you are. Many of us are in the same boat, and you'll always have support even if you think you don't. Good luck and Happy Holidays!
I am sorry I don't have any advice, when my husband was last deployed over Christmas our children were 17 months and 6 weeks.
I just wanted to say God Bless your husband, you and your family. And thank you from the bottom of my heart.