Oh, I had one of those! We ended up buying the crib tent until he was about 2, maybe 2 1/2. After that, we put a childproof doorknob lock on the inside of his door, I know it sounds mean, but otherwise he's just not safe at night, you never know if he will wake up and one night you might not hear him because you're so tired. It did make Ethan angry for the first couple of nights, but he got used to it. He wasn't always sleeping in his bed when I went to go get him in the morning in the beginning, but eventually he figured out that it was much more comfortable in his bed than the floor. It also taught him what time is bed time and how long he needs to stay in bed. We also have told all of our kids that unless they need to go potty or are sick, they don't need to get out of bed until the sun is shining in the sky, if the sun is sleeping, they should be too!!! Hope that helps.
I went thru the same thing and a baby gate fixed everything almost immediately! My son is still an early riser, but it stopped the nighttime waking, wondering, and bedtime struggles. We gated his bedroom door with an extra tall walk thru gate and when he wakes we ignore him unless it is by a certain time in the am and we know he's not going back down. He either crawls back in his toddler bed or falls asleep on the floor. Good luck!
Try putting him to bed at 7:00 on his old schedule. Toddlers who aren't getting enough sleep are actually MORE likely to wake at night than those who do. They often sleep later and better when they go to bed earlier (See Mary Kurcinka's book, "Sleepless in America"). Good luck.
Awww :-) He has a "zest for life." He also obviously adores his Mom - wanting more time. You know - this will pass. Stick with routine. Routine is key - especially the bedtime routine. My two have both been bad sleepers and at ages 3 & 5 they are finally starting to get the routine down. Around 7 we have a warm bath, 7:30 is quiet time - read a book or something calming. Sometimes we watch a little TV - but too much of that is over-stimulating. 7:45-8 they are tucked in and they each get prayer time - which is just one on one time to talk about the best parts of our day and thank God for whatever. They usually come out of their beds a couple of times, but I simply guide them back to their beds, give them a little rub - on the back or feet and leave them to fall asleep on their own. Stick with it - he'll learn. Yes - you do need to guide him back to his bed when he gets up. I always offer to rub their backs or feet - they love that. I USUALLY leave them relaxed but not asleep yet so they know they can fall asleep on their own. Hope that helps! Bed time is a challenge for us.
Jenny,
There is nothing wrong with locking the door and stripping the room to keep your sanity and your son safe in the middle of the night. You can use a baby lock or flip the doorknob. I would also strip his room. Get the dresser locked in a closet where he can't climb it and pull it over on himself. Get the toys where he can't reach or can't open the container.
He is most likely too young to be afraid of the dark, so keep his room as dark as you can. It is hard to play if you can't see anything. He will learn. Just leave him in his room until morning. It will take a week or two, but he will catch on.
I have heard some people say that you shouldn't lock in a kid because of fire safety, but what 20 month old knows how to get himself safely out of a house on fire anyway? You can get him out. That is what is important. It won't traumatize him for life. Babies sleep in cribs. They can't get out without someone coming to get them and they are fine.
Good luck,
Shellie
We put a baby gate up in their doorway. My girls couldn't climb over it until they were over 2 and by that time, I could reason with them and get them to understand that they needed to stay in their room. Good luck with the transition!
I don't know about locking his door but, have you tried the child proof handle covers? We put those on the inside of our daughters door (more out of a fear of her walking and falling down the stairs in the middle of the night) but it does keep her in her room at night. Just a thought.
Time and patience is what this child needs. Every child outgrows this phase in their own time and he needs you to gently help him learn. Lock him in his room? Can you say child abuse???????? No child should EVER be locked in their room. I'm hoping that was a moment of "i'm really tired and don't know what else to do" because it screams red flags to me!!! He's not even 2. Why do you expect him to know what he needs to do all the time? Why is he expected to sleep all night long. Most adults don't sleep like that. Why should he? If his body is waking up, you need to look at why. Is he really not needing that much sleep anymore? Just because some "expert" says he needs X hours of sleep doesn't mean he really does. I've had kids that age that would sleep like that and others that would sleep for a total of 5 hours in 24 hours. Each child is different and no expert can tell you what is correct for your child. If he does seem to really need the sleep, you need to find out why it's not happening. Is there something in his bed that's bothering him? Would he respond to music being played? (I have one child that can not go to sleep without music on.) Does he do better with a light on? Is there a baby gate that can be kept up to block the dangerous areas of the house? I have some that wake way earlier than I do and they have free reign of the house because I've babyproofed. Any rooms not ok are closed off with a door. I have been known to let an early riser snuggle in my bed with pbs on while I continue sleeping. You find what works. HOwever, DO NOT EVER lock a child in their room. That's dangerous and can get child protective service called on you VERY quickly.
When we put my baby in a toddler bed, we also put up a baby gate so she wouldn't get out and go downstairs. The babygate let her see out into the hallway and not feel separated from us. If she would fuss in the middle of the night, I would wait and see if she'd soothe herself back to sleep...I always found that if I went into her room she would stay up and if I'd leave her alone, she'd go back to sleep..
Get one of the door know thingys from the safety section in the infant area of your local store. They are usually to keep a child out of a room, but it would keep him in. It just goes around the door know and there are grippers for adult hands to squeeze but usually small children cannot get them. HOWEVER, it can happen that your child would figure it out. It is safe as anyone can open the door from outside and more safe for him to not be running around the house. Eventually he will learn he cannot get up. If you let him keep going, it will become such a learned habit that he will always do it.
I am a mom who's son climbed out of the crib already at 13 mos and proceded to climb every cabinet and cupboard in the house. We had to attach everything to the walls with brackets to make them anti-tip. Mind you there are some good things to that, he could already at age 9 climb the easy and intermediate rock walls at Valleyfair. By the time he was tall enough to maybe finally master the expert level, they took it away. He was very bummed. He is also very good in most sports and loves gymnastics.
we are currently in this stage but phasing it out. the going to bed later is probaly hurting more than helping. our son gets night terrors when he doesn't get enough sleep. So i would keep the bed time the same. As far as the 4 am, i had called the dr and asked him what to do....he said the goal is for me not to get out of bed. i could either have a pillow and blanket on the floor by my bed he could sleep at or put up a baby gate by his door so he couldn't get out. i did neither. i would let him get up at 5/5:30 and keep the day the same. we did this for about 2 or 3 weeks, i dont know time runs together when there is no sleep going on(we also have a 6 month old that was getting up once a night). this past week and a half i would take him back to his room, rock him and put him back in bed. then i would tell him, you need to stay in bed until it is light outside. you dont have to sleep but you must stay in bed. we would give him some books to look at. 9 out of 10 times he would just stay in bed and fall asleep. our son is just about to turn 21 months.
i think just ride it out a few weeks and if there is no improvement, try the baby gate or keeping the door locked.
Jenny,
Try a baby gate on the doorway. Also, try limiting one of his naps during the day.
Laura :)
I don't think I would lock the door from the outside, doesn't sound like a good idea from a legal standpoint. Have you tried the knob covers that the kids can't turn the knob with them on? I think that is the better option, just my opinion.
I liked the suggestion of just explaining to him that he can't get up unless it is light outside and supply him with books or a few toys. He will get the idea very soon.
Can you put a gate on his bedroom door, or will he climb over it. That's what I did with my boys when I moved them to a toddler bed. I have 4 boys.
Kelly S.
I have been there! We are finally (again - but that's another story) getting past this stage.. here's what worked for us:
We tried the gate and the child safety knob, that just made him scream more!! When I put him down for the night, I rub his back for about 5 minutes, then tell him I am going to do laundry, but if he stays in his bed, I will come check on him in a few minutes. He usually is asleep when I come back. Thank you to all the advice on this board!!! It took us over a year of very little sleep to come up with something that worked - though he could be just outgrowing the screaming and getting up stage too...
As for the night waking - what we finally decided was OK, was that he could come into our room and lay on our floor, but he could not wake us up. It took a while for him to get it (he's 2 1/2), but when he wakes up in the middle of the night, he comes up to our room, lays on the floor and goes to sleep. He rarely wakes me up (once in a while he asks to be covered up, and I tell him no, he needs to go to sleep).. We've even had 3 nights this week (a record for us) that he slept in his own bed all night!!! I remind him when I tuck him in how happy I would be if he would stay in his bed all night like a big boy! We make a big deal of it when he stays in his bed all night!!!
Good luck! I know how exhausted you probably are right now!
Put a couple of baby gates over the opening of the door. We used one gate on top of the other so that our sleep walker wouldn't leave her room. It was to tall for her to climb over.
I just went through this with my 2 year old. She had just learned to open up her bedroom door and was not going to bed when it was time. I got those knob covers and the first name she was mad but after that she's been fine. She doesn't even go near the door anymore. I read that one ladys response and give me a break. You are not in any way abusing your child. They need their sleep and so do you. Try them, they work awesome.
I think at 20 months he should still be in a crib. I have my 25 month old in a crib because I don't want him wandering around all night because it's dangerous and he can climb a gate. If he can climb out of the crib at the lowest spot you can cut a few inches off of the legs and drop the mattress to the floor inside. That's was we did because our son was climbing out at 17 months.
Don't lock the door from the outside because if social services finds out you'll be in trouble unless you have a really good reason. You can cut the door in half and do a dutch door though.
I would just stick with the crib. You'll all sleep better :o)
Our 25 month old and our 4 and 5 year olds sleep from 6:30 pm to 7 am every day. And the 2 year old also takes 2 naps still during the day for 1 1/2 hours each.
Jennifer
Mom to 4 and soon one more through another adoption.
We just went through this last month... We too were surprised when our son "jumped the crib" so we took the railing off and put some couch cushions next to the bed. We also had to deal with the fact that he could already get out of his room, so we did reverse the locks to keep him from wandering at night. It feels like it's mean, but I knew I couldn't trust him to be on his own at night, climbing on things and getting into who knows what. At least this way I know he is safe. We did this from the beginning, and at first he was not happy... After a few nights he accepted it, and it took a little over a week for him to figure out to go back to bed if he woke up at night. Once in awhile he still gets up, but I just go in briefly and put the covers back on and say "good night". That usully does the trick. You may have a longer struggle on your hands since he is used to being able to get out of the room, but I think if you stick with it, he will figure out that he needs to go back to sleep.
When my son first moved to a big boy bed we found him wandering the hall in the middle of the night a couple of times. The scary thing was we didn't always hear him - so we did just that. We turned the doorknob around and started locking him in at night. It worked great - he would just go back to bed when he got up - plus we didn't have to worry about him accidentally locking himself IN with the lock facing the other way!
Shena (=