I personally do not think 4 is too young to remember. My sons girlfriend teaches dance at a studio here in New Braunfels. They start them out at 2 yrs. old. I do not know wht you actually had in mind as for the party, but this studio does do birthday parties. I am not sure of the price. You can go to the website and check it out. Its Axis Performing Arts.
Perhaps with it being so close to Christmas it really is a money issue for your friend. She may not want to reveal all their expenses to you and is trying to let you know that although great idea they can't help at that time. I do think that a 4 year old can tell you what they like and don't like and would probably love playing dress up for the day, but do you remember your 4th birthday party (I sure don't)?? And at this age she won't know what day her birthday really falls on so it wouldn't matter what day you do it. I know its probably disappointing to see your plans fall apart, but if you guys still want to do something joint, maybe go low key. A ballet bbq may sound corny to you, but your daughter and her friend may love being dressed up and eating hotdogs. Bottom line, make it a special day that your daughter will love, but maybe save the bigger themes for later. Hope this helps. ~Maria
My son's birthday is the same day and it has been a challenge as far as guests attendance. He will be 13 this year. I have always tried to make a big deal of it since I've felt a bit sorry that it's so close to Christmas. What I've learned over the years is that he has fun no matter how big (cowboy party complete with ponies to ride & smores)or simple (cake & icecream with grandparents when I was expecting our 2nd child) or how many guests come. Some of the best ones have been with 4 or 5 people after we invited 20.
What he really enjoys is looking at the pictures of the parties. Sometimes he will go through each year and recall the theme as his way of remembering what we did.
I think you can do the ballet thing, but it can be done simply and will be remembered just as much as if you'd done it the expensive way.
I LOVE birthday parties too and here's some of the things I've done:
Pirate(son's 9th)/Mermaid(daughter's 7th) treasure hunt
Chuck E Cheese/Mc D's
Laser Tag (son's 12th)
Bowling (son's 10th- 10 pens get it?)
Princess party (daughter's 5th)
Cowboy party (son's 7th)-I don't think he remembers except for the picts.
MOvie out with friends
Son likes snakes, there's a guy that will come do a reptile presentation at your home. Our daughter liked it so much, she wants one of her own, but I told her I didn't know how many friends would show up! LOL
S
While I can remember my 3rd and 4th birthday parties, not everyone can. You'll have plenty of time to throw your daughter lavish birthday parties. Wait a year or two to start spending that kind of money. In the end you'll be thankful that you did.
You will remember it fondly. Your daughter will only remember it in pictures for the most part.
Well first, I have two kids, ages 4 and 2 (almost 5 and 3). The first birthday is always a biggy! No way the kids are going to remember it, it's more a celebration for friends and family to get together and celebrate. That being said, I had a big party for my son, but my daughter got so sick days before her first, it was just us four at the house.
For my son, at age 2 and 3 when he was in daycare and it was customary to invite the other kids to his party we would invite other kids from class and have bigger party. By the time my DD was 2, neither one was in daycare so we just had both his 4th and her second at the park with a few friends from church.
Now, my son vividly remembers his 4th birthday party, who was there and what he got. He also remembers his sister's 2nd party at the same park and what she got, so yes, your daughter will remember. The party size will also depend on whether they are in daycare or not and the season.
Do I think that at age 4 they need a "lavish" party, no. But, at that age, children LOVED themed parties. Parties are also special in that it is "their day". If you want a ballerina party, go for it, but don't worry about bringing in a hesitant friend for a joint party. Don't worry about the "big bucks either" as your daughter will not be balancing your check book any time soon! LOL. Keep it simple. Get a few inexpensive tutus, some magic wands and tiaras (walmart has them in the party section) and get some dance music (kids bop has some good ones) and let them party!! My son loves looking at his past birthday pictures.
Also, you can do this or not, it's just a suggestion. Both of my kids have their birthdays close to Christmas as well. TO MANY TOYS FOR ME!!! They have enough and I find it takes away from the meaning of Christmas by getting too much. This year we are going to ask for canned food items and diapers and such for the local food bank in lieu of toys. They can still have their friends over, eat, have cake, have fun and collect new memories, they will also each get "A" toy from us, but all the other stuff will be saved for Christmas.
Hope this helps.
Maybe you should plan on doing the party on your own. I would ask your friend if she would mind if you went ahead with the idea on your own. At 4 your daughter may remember the party, but it won't be all the lavish things. I wouldn't go too expensive on it. You might even be able to have a party at a dance studio. Also, and this is just my opinion, I think kids should have their own celebrations anyway and not joint parties. Birthdays are for celebrating their special day. You only get that once a year.
My daughter's going to be 4 this year. We're doing the same thing that we've done the last several years--a party with her friends and all their families. We find something inexpensive to make or buy for food (there's a place around here that sells good $5 pizzas, and we've done hot dogs before) and we just play in the backyard, eat cupcakes, and open presents. The decorations each year follow a theme that my daughter chooses. I don't really do games yet because she's not so good at participating in games right now. If she were at a party where someone were teaching her a dance, she probably wouldn't participate. I think age 5 might be better for a more expensive party. But, you know your daughter and her friends best. If you think she's ready, then have your own party, but I wouldn't try to talk your friends into it if they express concern because they really might not be able to afford it.
Weeeeeell, I remeber my 4th birthday >.> <.<
I have a daughter turning one on Sept. 15, and I am not
going to have anything for her but a backyard barbeque.
She is too young to remember anything big. I think at age
4 kids do remember. You should still make her something
big.
Sarah,
This is a little off subject but...........
My second sons birthday is the day after mine, for years I spent my birthday preparing for his and I didn't like that. We began celebrating his birthday the week before the actual date, he LOVED it.
I was dating a man who's birthday is the day after Christmas. His birthday always got lost in Christmas activities. We chose a day months before and celebrated his "un-birthday" day. That way it was his special day.
Some people celebrate their child's 1/2 birthday with a party, instead of December they celebrate in June. On the actual birthday they just have immediate family for dinner.
Hi Sarah,
I don't think 4 is too young and I think you can do it on a budget. You can find inexpensive tutus at the dollar store for all the girls. They can slip them right over their clothes or ask parents to have the kids "dress for the party" so you don't have to go through the expense of dressing everyone. Then you can provide a few dollar store tutus for those who forget to dress up. You can also find lots of accesories there too like tiaras, boas. Also if you want to keep the cost down, make your own cake or cupcakes (I do cupcakes with neon pink icing). My girls love it. You can decorate with marshmallows and sprinkles or have the girls decorate their own. And, look to your local high school or friends who may have teenagers who are dancers. I bet you could hire them at a fraction of the cost of a professional. At my daughters' dance academy some of their instructors where teenagers. Do the party at your home at your convenience and don't stress out about having a joint party? Do what you think your daughter will enjoy. It is her special day. If you keep the party small the girls will get lots of personal attention. You can do fingernail painting or just focus on the dancing. Most importantly have someone in your family videotape the party for her. She will love watching it back. My girls love to watch the dvd's of their parties. I've been throwing them huge backyard themed parties every year since they were 1. They are 5 and 7 now. I always do in at my house and always do it on a budget. Hot dogs and home made cakes. Keep the food simple and activities simple. Girls love the dress up but remember it doesn't have to be extravagant or expensive. They will have fun with whatever you give them. Put them in a tutu and take a picture, throw on some music and let the party begin. Good luck!
Yes, the husband is right!
I would probably wait one more year. Think back to your childhood and what you remember. I personally have no memories at the age of 4 but I do remember a lot about the age of 5. My husband does have a few memories at 4 but they are very minor things and vague. I'd wait a year; then everyone will be happy. If the combo party ends up being a problem, just do your own next year. I'm sure they'll understand.
I believe that at four they are old enough to remember their party. I have a 6 year old and a 4 year old and they both remember their 4th birthday parties. I think that if it is something fun and that they enjoy it will be something they will remember for life.
I think your idea is great, but you have some valid points. First of all, think back to when you were a kid. My husband and I agree that our first real memories are from second grade on which would be seven years old. I can remember my teacher's name and things I learned so four is really too young to remember. If you have put your daughter in dance classes, you will also know that their attention span is VERY short, and some are flat out non-participatory. I would say don't waste your money on a teacher. You could join together and do a joint backyard thing and get a bouncy castle, put the $ together and have a pretty good spread. I have always had a themed party for my kids regardless of whether or not they will remember it. You could go smaller and have a "tutu tea party" where they dress up but the activity is easier/cheaper. Do different sandwiches cut into six pieces each and serve cocoa and cookies/cake. If you can find a miniature tea set, the kids will LOVE that. As for the date, my bday is dec 22. My mom usually did parties in early dec...around the 11th so people would still be in town. Good luck with making the decision.
Some 4 year olds will remember this event their entire life, and some won't. Asking them to be taught a dance is a bit much. A dress up idea is great (no boys coming, I take it?), and maybe just a tea party theme along with dress up - that way you could do it on your own. Fairly simple, small foods- finger foods. Until kids are in grade school when they really develop friendships, just keep the party ideas simple, flexible and fun - get your daughter's input. It is not a competition with other moms! Relax!!
I think four years old is ok, she will probably remember it, especially if she has a really great time. Children start holding memories long term around 3 years of age.
Go solo. This is your daughter's special day and she shouldn't have to share it anyway.
I think you should make a December baby girls birthday as special as you can as everyone deserves a special birthday and especially close to Christmas and as she gets older with school and such many people may be out for the holidays when she has her birthday, or in holiday mode and not birthday mode. Birthdays are special and 4 is a preschool age which they can remember, I wouldn't pressure the other mom though as if they are resisting and wanting something different for their daughter its their choice. Cost is a factor in all birthday parties, I would do what you can to make your daughter's birthday special even if its on your one budget instead of combining birthdays.
Invite the other girl by all means, but if you want to make it a ballerina party then do it. Northwest Rec has Dance at 11am for 3-4 no special dress required but outside there are picnic tables and a playscape for after the dance class lesson. My little girl loved the dance here and teacher. Its a free class for those who haven't been before, but if you call and explain your idea they may ask to pay a attendance fee for the girls and then you could have the party contining outdoors. Just an idea, Also Craigslist may be a way to acquire a private lesson instructor for your house if you post your interests there as well. Good luck, I say don't listen to party squashers do what you want to do, its your daughter and its only once a year that they have this celebration.