I am a mother of a 12 year old girl. I was 18 when she blessed me. When I delivered her the OB gave me a Episiotomy. I am currently having my 2nd child now. I am 30 and Very nervous about all the new things that are out there for helping in the birthing process. I need some suggestions . My OB is not going to cut me and that makes me very nervous that I am going to tear! When my daughter was born she had a large head and she was 8'10oz. If you have any opinions bad or good please tell me. Thank you Happy July 4th
Erin
HI Erin,
My son is 5 and I had an episiotomy during delivery. I'm a little confused--Is your OB refusing or are you against having it? How can they say they won't do it until they see if it's necessary during the delivery? My OB also had to use the vacuum extractor to deliver and I was very afraid of that--but no problems with it.
They tell you to do a birth plan to make sure your OB knows what you do and do not want done and used. You always have the flexibility to change it once things are underway. (For example if you don't want an epidural or medication, then change your mind as your labor progresses).
Good luck to you!
Can you go to a birthing class at your hospital? While it scared us a bit (first time parents), they go over every procedure and process with you. It might facilitate asking your doctor more questions. Also, I agree - how can the doc say they won't cut? There are ways to try and stretch the perineum (sp?), but I ended up with an episiotomy anyway with my daughter at 8 lbs. 1 oz. I did have an epidural (loved it!) and they had some great tricks to help me succeed with breastfeeding. If you need some books to read about the subject, send me an email and I'll send you a link! Good luck!
Well I can tell you that I had an episiotomy with my first and not with my second 2 years later. And the second baby was bigger than my first. So, I would discuss with your OB, does he/she not do episiotomies at all or only do them last minute decision if needed. My OB with my first was like that he had told me that he doesn't do episiotomies and I was worried about tearing so I asked him and he said that he would do it if I needed it but doesn't automatically do episiotomies every time. So fully discuss it with your OB, maybe there was a little misunderstanding or tell him/her that in the moment if it looks as though you may tear I would prefer another episiotomy than a possible tear. I can't imagine that they wouldn't cater to your worries its not like its a major process, its the difference of a pair of scissors and a some stitches. And hopefully you won't need it at all, good luck. PS If you have the option, I had an OB for my first and a midwife for my second and I would choose midwife over OB any day! They seem way more personally pleasing than the OB, at least in my experience! Good luck, Jen
Hi,
Getting the cut is not that big of a deal. With my first I didn't need one (6lbs 13 oz)but I did have a tiny tear. With my second I had a fourth degree (8lbs 10 oz) that healed up nicely after about a week. With my third I had no epidural and no cuts or tears (8lbs 6 oz). With my fourth it went the same as my third (9lbs 15 oz). I would rather have the cut than the tear(the tiny tear hurt more than the fourth degree cut). The ob will probably not cut you unless you have to be, but they can't really know that until it's showtime. If you don't need the cut, then they probably won't. Take a class, talk to your ob about your concerns and make sure your labor coach knows your wishes . Good Luck!
I had a my oldest daughter at 19, she is now in middle school. I needed to be stitched up from 2nd degree lacerations. The 2nd baby (now nearly 2), came out with no problem, a few pushes and that was it. No stitching required. Even though it has been a while, the second one will be easier. Mine were 9 years apart. Now you have a built in moms helper and babysitter.
I agree with all PPs here that you really should clarify with your OB whether they don't want to plan to cut or whether they won't cut at all, although the latter seems unlikely. I had an episiotomy with the delivery of my son and was told that that didn't mean I would need one with any future deliveries; that, in fact, having, um, stretched out once, it was less likely to be a problem the next time. Also, there are newer studies out there that show that most natural tears that occur are smaller and easier to heal than episiotomies, so unless you're going to tear badly or in a bad direction (towards the rectum, for example), there's no urgency to cut any more. Best of luck!
Hi! Yes, things do change. While it used to be that OB's routinely gave episiotomies with almost every birth, that is not the case now. Studies have shown that often episiotomies heal slower than tearing and there are more long-term problems with incontinence, etc, after episiotomy. So now, most OB's do not automatically do this. However, there are cases where it is necessary - if the tear is going in a direction that may cause secondary problems or the use of a vaccuum extraction or forcepts usually require an episiotomy. With this in mind, I would agree with the others who say to discuss it more with your OB, who can address your concerns and explain how she will make that decision in the delivery room.
I would definitely recommend that you take a birthing class (Lamaze, etc). Even if you aren't as interested in the natural birth methods, the classes do give quite a bit of information on things like episiotomies, ways to deal with pain, and other options during labor that might have changed since your first time through this!
(I mentioned studies, so I'll include here a link on the topic from the American College of Obstetrics and Gynecology, the organization that sets the standards for OB's - http://www.acog.org/from_home/publications/press_releases/nr03-31-06-2.cfm)
Good luck and Congratulations!
Yes, things change with medical practices over the years, but the one thing that doesn't change is the PAIN!! No matter whether you are cut or tear naturally, it will hurt during birth (you already know that!) You may end up tearing down the same cut line as the episiotomy. Don't worry about it. Enjoy the last few weeks and good luck to you!
Some OB's and midwifes do what they call a Perenial(sp) massage. The OB my friends and I go to do this massage and most of un didn't tear or only needed one stitch. I had my first child with a different OB that didn't do this and I ripped from front to back. My new OB did the massage with my second and I didn't tear at all. I would definatly ask you OB about this. It's a simple technique even your husband could do. You insert your pointer and middle finger just inside the vagina and continually massage in a circular motion with pressure to naturally stretch your walls to make the baby sqeeze through more easily. Good luck to you and your new addition. I hope all goes well.
Hi Erin,
I had an episiotomy with my first delivery, and a small tear with my 2nd. Both my girls had large heads, and the 2nd's was actually bigger. From my experience the episiotomy hurt far worse and took longer to heal than the tear. I had a natural birth with the 2nd, and did not feel any great pain related to the tear. Her delivery was quicker & easier for me. I hope this helps ease your mind. Best wishes and congrats on the baby on the way!
Hi Erin!
My first daughter was born in a birthing center, and I had a very difficult labor and delivery, and the OB DID give me the episiotomy, that was 1983. In 1991 I was going to give birth to my second daughter in the hospital with a different OB, and he did not want to give me the episiotomy, even when I asked repeatedly. Well, I tore, and then it was even more difficult for him to sew me up, and it hurt like hell.
In my opinion, if you had an episiotomy for the first...demand it for the second! Both of my daughters were similar in weight, just under 7lbs.
On another note about "not" having the episiotomy is that my husband and I could not enjoy making love in one of our favored positions. This was not good for us.
Having a baby is a wonderful, loving experience, and your OB needs to be on the same page with your wishes. If not, you may want to choose another one.
I hope this helps!
Mardi
Well things do change! My son was 8 12 when he was born with a head in the 90%. :) I did not get cut before hand either... the nurse/midwife (I'm not sure who - I wasn't paying much attention) did a lot of "massage" in that area while I was in labor to relax the muscles and try and "stretch" the skin. It really helped... I did still tear a little bit, but to be honest, I didn't realize it until they told me afterwards. All the different types of feelings and pains involved in labor and delivery are merged together in one moment. It isn't as if you feel a tear as a separate pain...
I would definitely not cut... hope for the best!
Good luck!
I had an episiotomy with my first child who was 7lbs 14oz, and I did not have one with my second who was a whopping 9lbs 3oz. it was merely a difference of doctors and how they do things. but I have to say that my recovery from my second was MUCH easier and less painful even though I did tear a bit in a couple places. So I would say don't worry too much about it! you could always tell your doctor that if it is apparent that you're going to tear very badly you'd like him to do an episiotomy, but you'll be surprised by what your body can do on it's own.
Good Luck!!
Hi Erin,
I also had an episiotomy with my first, almost 10 years ago. I was in extreme pain after my delivery, my stiches didn't dissolve the way they should have. When I had my second son 6 years ago they did not cut me, and I did tear along the scar of my episiotomy. I hardly knew, I recovered much quicker from the tear then from them actually cutting me. Within a week and a half after my second delivery we traveled 6 hours away by car. That would not have happened with my first I was in too much pain to sit that long :)
I also tore with my third son and again the pain was not as much as with my first.
Everyone is different and I hope I helped you alittle with your nerves :)
Best of luck!
Erin -
I had tearing when my daughter was born - As the OB said "She found her own way out"! However, I had an epidural & didn't feel a thing when it happened. Don't get me wrong... I definately felt the sensation of her being born, just not the pain. He stitched me up and I'm fine. OB's don't cut anymore because the healing is much more natural and better. Also, the tearing occurs where it needs to, not where an OB decides... which might not be necessary.
I did, however, have a little issue for a while as the scar tissue was bulding up.. now it's fine, tho, and I don't think it'd be any different from a episiotomy.
Good Luck - You'll be fine!
Erin,
I also had a large baby who was 9lbs 9oz! His head measured over 13 inches at birth!! By the way, I am not a large person to begin with! I did have minimal tearing and I think it was the result of several things. My midwife was in constant communication with me during the pushing process. So I was asking her how I was doing and if I was tearing and if I should push harder or less... It helps to have a great midwife or attendent who understands birth as a natural process. It also helps to go natural with no drugs. You have more control, you can guage when to push and when to ease up. I actually pushed in an interesting position as well. It may have helped with less tearing. Be sure your birth plan specifies that you don't want to be hooked up to machines so that you can have full range of motion and listen to what your body is telling you to do. Finally, my midwife put a topical numbing agent on and stitched me very well. I healed well and have no nerve damage at this point - two years later!
Best wishes for a great birth!!
Just had #2 Dec 07 and my OB let me tear rather than cut. I had bad episiotomy w/ first baby in 03. WAY WORSE to get cut than to tear. I had a week of discomfort with the second and the tear. WIth my first I was sitting on an invalid donut for more than a month because the pain from sitting was so bad. Don't worry - be glad that your OB isn't a cutter!!!!
Hi, Erin!
Congratulations!
First, I would start w/ a great childbirth ed class (a free-standing one NOT a hospital-based one).
Also, keep in mind that the risk of you getting a 3rd or 4th degree laceration is about 70% HIGHER with an episiotomy than if you just tear naturally.
You can also do some perineal massage 1-2x/day to help stretch & prepare your muscles & tissues.
Good luck & I hope you have a wonderful, beautiful birth!
Abbie
You should find a doctor willing to cut you if necessary! that is a strange position for your doctor to be taking, and you should let him/her know. I would get a different doctor! I needed Episiotomies with both big babies! You need to be comfortable with your delivery-no added stress. Talk this over with your OB and see what he/she suggests.