If you are truly concerned I suggest talking to the teacher about it instead of first bringing it to the attention of her superior- which will undermine and embarrass her. If the principal doesn't move your child then you will have to deal with her and that discomfort between the two of you all year as you work together in your child's best interest. Keep in mind that 1)she probably got that tattoo in college and doesn't even pay attention to it (may not even realize that it could be offensive) 2) having tattoos removed is expensive and painful 3)just because hse had spunk in her younger days does not mean she isn't a fantastic teacher. She may be the very teacher your child needs to acheive great things...
I think a kinder approach (than asking a poor teacher to buy new shoes or wear something uncomfortable (let's face it- she is on her feet all day and you don't want your child's teacher sitting because her feet hurt)) is to talk with your child about it before it becomes an issue. Tell her you don't like tattooes and they are unacceptable in your family (or whatever you believe) but it doesn't make your teacher any less of a person. The teacher is still an authority, still a professional who has been trained to do an important job. I admit, allowing the tattoo to show is careless (in my opinion not because it is a bad thing- I don't have them, but they aren't evil- it's just not very professional), but it is so hot in TX and feet get so sweaty...
Moving your child teaches your child that you shouldn't having relationships with people who look or behave differently... You don't have to agree with a person's actions to still respect them. Trying to move your child also announces to the principal that you are going to be a "difficult" parent- which may make them less eager to deal with you when you would otherwise like them to.
So what is more important? Would you rather have a good teacher with a tattoo or a bad one without? You say you're not against tattoos, you know it does not make her less of a person for having one, but you're not sure you want "this person" teaching your daughter? If you are not against tattoos, and it doesn't make her less of a person for having one, then what is your real issue? Why don't you wait and find out what kind of teacher she is before you consider changing your daughter's class? I'm sure she's seen tattoos before and if you don't make a big deal out of it, she won't think a thing about it. Do you think your daughter is going to spend all of her school time obsessing about this tattoo? Most likely not, and as long as the teacher is a good teacher and the tattoo is in reasonably good taste(which by your description it is), then you should just ignore the tattoo. If your daughter asks, handle it just like you said, some people choose to, and some people don't. For all you know, the teacher may have gotten it when she was 18, hate it now and be planning on having it removed when she can save up the money(might be a while on a teacher's salary) and as far as that goes, teachers do so much for so little pay and even fewer thanks, why make a tattoo such a big deal? BTW - no, I don't have any tattoos. I hope you base your decision on the caliber of the teacher and what your child learns from her - and I'm pretty sure that getting a tattoo will not be in the lesson plan this year.......
This is ridiculous. Do you shelter your child from everyone you see on the street as well? Tatoos are not considered trouble anymore, they are so mainstream. I think you need to get over this and get a grip on the world we are living in today. It is not like this tatoo is a religious symbol or sexually based. It is a flower for goodness sake! I may be one of the most conservative moms I know and I am floored by the fact that you are even bringing this to the board.
I do think you are being overly concerned. Tattoos are a personal choice. I don't think they send a bad message, possibly a good opportunity to talk about it. If you were really concerned you could speak to the principal about it. However, I wouldn't. I think its good for children to see all kinds of people.
Hi you are obviously uncomfortable with a teacher having a tattoo in a visible place. Do you think that this means she is more likely to have different values than you and that you think she will somehow be more permissive or encourage things you don;t want encouraged in your daughter? I would really think hard about where this us coming from bc a lot of this is just assumptions based on a small tattoo. (it could be she has many more that are not visible or maybe this is the only one!)
I don't have a tatoo and personally would never get one. However I would not dismiss someone's values or teaching or morality based on a small visible tattoo. My son had a mothers day out aide that habitually wore very low rise pants and a very visible thong. I thought it was in poor taste for a teacher but was willing to consider that she might be a great aide. BUT she was also a mediocre aide and after several months of caring for kids in a disinterested manner she was let go bc parents complained...not just about the thong but about her unresponsiveness to the kids. I still don;t think one is related to the other but I can see how people would end up with those perceptions.
I personally have more problems with preteens dressing like 21 year olds on a man hunt and have to wonder abotu their moms and their values. A tatoo in an adult...small and not the most conspicious would not in the least bother me. I would want the teacher to be the best she could be for my daughter...first grade is not an easy year and its important to have a sensitive caring teacher. If you make the tatoo an issue you are most likely going to generate more interest in your daughter and push her where you don;t want her to go. Most likely she will not care. Just tell her some people like to decorate their bodies that way. There are some truly big issues waiting to raise their head in a few years with all our kids. making an issue over a small tatoo on a teacher before you even know what kind of person she is, is really not very significant a battle to fight at this point.
Good luck!
Seing as how it is not an offensive tatoo, I normally would not be too concerned, I am of the younger generation that it is more acceptable though. However, the teacher is in a role model position and so as a parent I would be concerned, the school should have her cover it up. I work in aviation and all tatoos must be covered. I would speak with the principal first and find out what the school policy is, then look to have her removed.
I hope that you are teaching your child that just because someone is different doesn't make them bad. But it seems like you are not. Your "concern" is bigoted, narrow-minded, intolerant, and ethnocentric. You are judging someone by their appearance, not by the content of their character (MLK) or their credentials. Another horrible lesson to teach your child. What would happen if your child had a teacher from India with a small nose piercing? What if your child had an African-American teacher with dredlocks? I teach a university, and a former student of mine majored in education. She is a Muslim and wears a headscarf. Would you yank your child out of her class? What if you are Christian your child's teacher was wearing a Star of David necklace?
I hope your child never has an appearance-related issue that would cause people like you to dismiss her intelligence and talent the way you are dismissing the intelligence and talent of her teacher with the tatoo.
If your daughter asks about it, you can tell her what I have told my first grader. All I had to do was mention that tattoos are made by poking your skin with a needle a LOT of times. This really opened her eyes (literally), and I think that for at least the time being she can't imagine ever wanting to get one!
I've taught elementary music in 3 districts and 2 states, and find that tattoos are really getting to be pretty common among women - young, older, teachers, you name it. I don't have one myself, but from working with plenty of teachers who do, I can say that it never impacted the job they did. (Even my daughter's pediatrician has one on her foot like you've described!) As for explaining it to your daughter, it is a great learning experience. I would wait until she brings it up. Keep your eyes out for other women in your families lives who have them too so she can see that her teacher is just like other people. (Kids need this lesson anyways - most of them think that we sleep in the closets at school. The look on their faces when they see me at the grocery store - whoa!) Classroom change requests are tricky things. I would only do it if you have serious problems with the teacher. Balancing class lists, with considerations for gender, age, learning differences, race, etc. are very tricky, and a principal who gives in to every parent request isn't supporting his/her staff very well. My advice - take a deep breath, prepare for the inevitable questions, and enjoy getting to know your daughter's new teacher!
I would be wayyy more concerned if that teacher could not teach addition and subtraction and all the important fundamentals of first grade. If your child asks about it just say it is a decision that some people make when they are in college. THen don't discuss it anymore. Its not a big deal. I coach a sport that has the same amount of judgmental parents and i have 5 tattoos. The children cant see them while i coach, but they see them when i wear a tank top. it doesnt change the way i coach. perhaps you should ask your girlfriends and see how many have one or two that they are hiding from you. i used to coach at a different gym where it didnt matter if you could see any tattoos or piercings...but here in this area some parents need to chill out!!! many parents where i coach have tattoos as well. and they dont hide them. hope you chill out and change your mind about people that are a teeny bit different.
Narrow minded parents raise narrow minded children. You sound like a bigot. It seems you are okay with labeling your child with this title as well. BYW it is Tattoo not tatoo.
I think you have every right to be concerned. I think some of the other moms are being to harsh on you.
This teacher is in 1st grade. These kids are only 6-7yrs old. She herself should be thinking about the tatoo and what kind of impression she is making. She should not have to be told to cover it up. She should have the proper discernment to cover it up around her students. What school district is allowing a teacher to wear flip-flops? Our students cannot even wear flip-flops, or crocs. They have to wear PE appropriate shoes at all times. I think this teacher is way out of line and very unprofessional. Go with your gut!!
You have a ton of responses. First impressions are everything. My old boss would make me cover up my tatoo that's on my ankle, but he was a really mean boss. I can understand where your coming from. My husband is covered in tatoos and he is going to be a real estate manager and he already knows that he is going to have to wear long sleeve shirts and pants all the time in front of clients. But don't let tatoos fool you, it's that gut feeling that you should be worried about. The one you get when you know something ain't right with someone. Just see how things go. She could be the best teacher ever!
Hey Chris! Well, I want to start by saying that I've scanned over some of the other mother's posts and to be quite honest, I'm shocked. Some of them are quite rude. Heaven forbid you ask for advice! Thats the whole point of this website. Because of these moms, I know the next time I have a question, I sure wont ask it on here. Shame on the mothers who feel the need to be obnoxious.
Ok, back to the point. I have a fairly large tattoo on my back but i can cover it up when need be. I got it when i was 18 and in a stage of my life that i wouldnt care to go back to. I also have a daughter who is starting kindergarten on Monday. So, i am definitely objective. Personally, i would also have a problem with a teacher showing her tattoo to my child. You are right, they are so impressionable at that age. My daughter knows that tattoos arent a bad thing, but yes, teachers are held at a higher standard. If waitresses and waiters have to do it, they should too! I really cant think of any professional position that WOULD NOT require that they cover it up.
Hi Chris,
Wow, I'm amazed at what a cord this has struck with so many this early in the morning! LOL I'm a little sad by the tone of some of the responses you've received, I hope you won't let them bother you to much today :-)
That being said, I am a former second grade teacher who is staying home to raise my own and I definitely think teachers should be held to a higher standard when it comes to professional and conservative standards of dress. Many districts require teachers to cover visible tatoos, I suspect the district you are in does have that policy, it just probably isn't being enforced. I have a friend that teaches and just keeps a box of bandaids in her desk to cover her small ankle flower on days she wears capris.
I really wouldn't make that big a deal about it. I hope you never have an awful teacher as my child did two years ago because then it would become painfully clear that a small tatoo is minor compared to what a negative and mean teacher can do to your child's mental state....:-(
Do you know who Steven Curtis Chapman is? Incase you don't, he is a well known and very popular Christian singer who has won countless awards for his music. A few months ago, his seventeen year old son accidentally ran over his five year old sister killing her. On the morning of the awful accident, the little girl had drawn a picture of a flower with six petals, only one of which was colored in. Steven's wife just recently had this small little picture tatooed on the top of her hand as a reminder of her precious daughter. Steven and his two older sons also had tatoos in honor of this lost child. I guess my point is that people of all walks of life get all kinds of tatoos for so many different reasons. So, it may not be something you and I would do, but it the tatoos are tasteful (not naked ladies and other vulger stuff) then we just have to accept it as a person's right and concentrate on the more important qualities, especially one's integrity.
Best wishes for a wonderful year for your daughter (and you, too!)
In my opinion, yes, you are being extreme and over sheltering. My parents have been missionaries all my life, so I completely understand the different levels of thinking on tatoos. But my mom watched an episode, a while back, of "Miami ink" and it changed her views...not to the extent where she is going to get one or like for one of her children or grandchildren to. But she doesn't look down on someone because they have tatoos. Many times there are heart breaking stories behind the reason someone got a tatoo or for an inspirational reason. I could understand your concerns if it was a skull or something dark. In today's time and age if something on this level is bothering you so badly you're going to have a tough time. You could use this time for you and your daughter to both learn from. You don't judge a book by it's cover. This teacher could be the most inspirational one your daughter will ever have. Just my opinion....hope you figure it out!
Unfortunately, today's society is full of things that don't fit into the box considered "moral majority." Only a few years ago, flip flops would have been looked upon as unacceptable. Society's expectations of what is acceptable continues to broaden which leads parents to ask themselves "how open minded am I supposed to get?!" This is one of those situations that you will need to prioritize your judgement of others and "pick your battles." I, personally, wouldn't have a problem with a flowery tatoo. However, if it were flames and a skull...yikes! Pierced ears are okay, pierced noses...ummmm. The things I DO have a problem with are elementary teachers that have improper grammar or accents that make it difficult for the children to learn how to speak/spell correctly (i.e. let me "axe" you a question). Any of the teachers I have had issues with have had "acceptable" outwardly appearances. However, I wouldn't give you a dime for their teaching ability! Fortunately, you and your husband (regardless of the time spent with your children vs. the time they spend with teachers)will always be who your children look to as models for appropriate behavior, speech and appearance. You're right...this is a good opportunity for a few "talking points." The first would be to explain what tatoos are, how they're made, and the health risks involved in getting one. The second might be how not to "judge a book by it's cover."
Of course, just my opinion, but I would simply explain what it is if she asks, and then explain your view. I tend to be pretty conservative, yet to me, this doesn't seem worth a request to change teachers. There could even be non-visible things about other teachers that bother you more. Provided she ends up being a good teacher, I think I would use it as a learning experience. I supposed one other option is to talk with the teacher if you feel comfortable enough. Perhaps she would wear footwear that hid the tatoo while she was teaching.
I do think you are thinking too much into it. Judge by what a great teacher she is and be happy that its a flower and not a skull and bones or pot leaf. Don't judge a book by its cover. Some of the most "normal" conservative looking people do some really messed up things behind closed doors. If your child questions it- just give your perspective on what you think- and explain that it was her choice but it's not a choice YOU would of made. You are her role model- Teachers come and go but role model moms are here to stay.
Don't forget- most people regret the tatoo they get and it could of been a bad choice- or its something to remember someone in their life that may have passed away- there is usually a meaning behind a tatoo. t's notmy choice but I know many people with them and that is my experience. Having it on her foot meant that she felt a bit conservative about it. I do not hink there is anything wrong with your child even asking her. Not like you 1st grader is going to go out and get one- right? lol
Get to know the teacher and volunteer in the class as much as possible. I bet you will be pleasantly surprised.--"Dont judge a book by its cover" is something we sometimes loose perspective of when we are moms.-Its that protective guard..and thats ok.