I am wondering if any of you have experienced some of these characteristics with your 4 year old (I have a boy).
He can't stand tags in his clothing, socks are too tight, pants are too tight (even though they are not.....), no long sleeve shirts (can't stand them!). Behaviors he has are: tantrums....screaming, yelling, and hitting the bedroom door...etc... when we are transitioning him from one thing to the next...and he is not happy about the next event. We also are hearing from others that he is bugging other kids who are next to him (by touching, touching, touching) in pre-school and in church settings. He is not a naughty boy all the time, but I am just wondering if you all have kido-s like this? Is this normal 4 year old stuff.....or? We have been using a sticker behavior chart and have been having great success....however the outbursts-tantrums and bugging others has not decreased. Thanks so much for your thought! :)
Sounds like he might have autism? I would go online and read about it and I would also make an appointment with his doctor. There are good doctors out there who only see patients with autism.
Good luck and Gods Blessing to you
Denise
sounds like a sensory thing. could be an autism spectrum disorder. have you discussed these behaviors with your pediatrician?
Traci-
My nephew was the same way- Especially with buttons on his shirt! He was diagnosed with Asbergers (a type of Autism) I would talk to your family doctor and get their thoughts- It could be nothing at all!
Good Luck!
I have a 3 1/2 year old boy, and have been seeing some of this lately too - hates tags in shirts, pants are too tight, etc. The behavior issues come & go. I tend to be less reactionary than most parents & try to wait things out - see if it's just a phase. I think it's mostly "pre-school boy stuff" - they want to be in control of everything. I would not be paranoid about autism, but I'm not a worryer. However, a call to your pediatrician/family doctor certainly couldn't hurt if you are really concerned. Good luck!
I have heard of something to do with the senses. Try calling First Steps. They are the ones who told me about it.
At some level, I still think must of this is within normal range for 4 year old boys. All of my friends with boys in this age group (mine is 6) are complaining of variations on this theme. That said, there's a growing school of thought around something called sensory integration disfunction that refers to difficulty processing different kinds of neurological input. Some are oversensitive, some are undersensitive...sometimes a little of both depending on the input. A lot of what you described has happened with my son. He can't stand to wear button down shirts because the buttons bother him, the seams in his socks make him crazy, loud noises make him completely unglued (he can't bear auto-flush toilets, for example). In any event, you might check out the book "The Out of Sync Child" and/or seek an evaluation from an Occupational or Behavioral Therapist specializing in sensory integration disorder.
Good luck and try to have as much patience as you can and know that your little boy is working hard too.
Traci,
I dont know about the sensory thing, my nephew is 5 and he can not stand tags, never could, his brother who is now 2 has his mom remove all tags. The older one will always wear two shirts. No matter how hot it is. Something that he feels he likes to do. As for sock half the time these boy dont want them on and when they are on the beg to take them off.
I have many nephews and nieces and they all have gone through phases about wearing, not wearing. It is a growing spot within the childrens lives.
As for his tantrums, all children have them. Even as they get old my pre-teen nieces are at it often. Not getting their way or someone has something kool at school and she has to have it to.
Children are all different but then have many same characteristics. I belive that it is all a part of growing up. Wait til your children hit the teens man I have been through it 3 times all girls. I survived.
Jodi
www.noahbyjodi.com
He sounds VERY similar to my 4 year old son! My son has Autism, and has been in early intervention programs since he was 2, so we are working past most of that stuff.
I would talk to your pediatrician, and look into getting him screen before things get worse. Even if it's nothing, it is worth checking into!
This is not a bad or boy behavior It sounds like a sensory issue start by looking up sensory issues on the internet go
back to when he was a baby and just
write down anything that seems different to you or your husband about the pregency/birth and from then on.
It is not a big deal for him at all it is more of a deal for us as parents it just changes the way you may have to do things with him it becomes a life style. I have a son like this and I was shocked when I made my list and then went on line and found out all these things were normal for him as they get older then tend to deal with things like tags and stuff better or they learn just to take them out themselves.
The touching thing comes and goes I have learned with my son that is the best way for him to learn.if he is not one with the thing or person he doesn't connect or learn well. I have sooo much more I could write but that would be overload. You need to look into it and go with the flow.
OH I have to add in about the transition thing we can NEVER surprise our son or not tell him where or what we are going to be doing and this has been forever he gets so flustered that he has actually had asthma attacks hoildays are the worst. Just always let your son know way ahead about what is going to be happening and if it is to big of a deal just don't do it.
sounds like it could be a sensory issue. My son has some of the same issues. I would call the local school system & have him tested by an OT. My son saw an OT for 2 years - you would not believe the changes. He has since tested out & just receives Speech & is in a preschool class. Testing is free - it couldn't hurt & it may put you at ease.
Hi Traci-
From what you have described, your son may have sensory processing disorder. This is when a person's nervous system does not perceive input from the senses in a normal way. Some children are extremely sensitive, some extremely underresponsive to stimuli, and other seek out lots of stimuli, as if they can't get enough. There are varying degrees of spd, and many kids have combinations of both. These kids have major problems with transitions, and can seem oversensitive to the point of tantrums. Both my children have this, although my daughter to a lesser degree than my son. Find an occupational therapist trained in this disorder, and have your son evaluated. They will give you a questionaire about your son's behaviors. I don't know what area you live in, otherwise I might be able to recommend one.
Some books on this disorder are: Out of Sync Child, Sensational Kids, The Sensory Sensitive Child. A good therapist can help a lot. Even though your son is 4, don't count on the school district's OT to have a clue. Some school OTs are well-versed, and knowledgeable, but others are not, and don't even recognize this disorder. Please let me know if you need anything else, and good luck. It's not easy to live with a child with this, but once it's recognized, and you get some help and strategies, it makes life MUCH better.
Just wanted to add something after reading the other responses: Your son can have sensory processing disorder without having autism or Asperger's. It often is seen in combination with other disorders as well, like Down's syndrome and cerebral palsey. So don't get worried about that yet. ALSO, there are many pediatricians who don't know about this disorder, so don't leave it up to your physician. I've heard too many stories about parents KNOWING something was wrong with their child, and the pediatrician refuting them. In the end, every parent I talked to turned out to be right! I'm a teacher, and I have a student in first grade who is obviously Aspergers, but the pediatrician has never mentioned one word to his parents.
Traci,
The tag/clothing this is a classic "sensory" issue. It could be a sensory disorder, or it could be a symptom of ADD. I would recommend getting him tested - talk to your ped. This doesn't mean you have to medicate him - there are other therpies or holistic options available. The best thing is to get him tested and diagnosed early so that that he and you can learn to deal with the behavior in a way that works.
Good luck!
liz
Traci,
My daughter has the same sensory issues. Tags are the worst, but she previously had issues with balance (going down stairs)and was not speaking at the age of 2. She was tested and her sensory issues were not her biggest issue, but the did say that they were common in kids with other developmental delays like her speech delay.
I am happy to say, she just turned 4, she speaks better than other 4 yo kids she knows and her balance issues are gone. The tag issue remains, but I can definately live with that. Her speech therapy and occupational therapy worked miracles with her. I am so grateful for all that was done for her.
So, don't be afraid to get your son tested. It may be the best thing you ever do for him.
Try not to see this as "naughty boy" stuff, but rather as sensory issues that he needs your help with. It is possible that he has more serious sensory issues as others have referred to, or that these are just preferences that he will outgrow. My kids outgrew those sorts of things, other kids do not. In any case, try talking to him about the challenges he faces, like explain to him what transitions are coming up and help him think of a plan to make it easier for him. Or explain, without judging him, why other kids might not like being touched, and ask him for ideas on other things he can do instead that might not bug people. He may have some compulsions that need some sort of release, but you can help him by offering your support in developing alternative ideas.
Sounds like he has some sensory issues. I suggest that you read the book The Out-of-Sync Child. My child has issues like that and he is currently six years old. I would talk to your son's pediatrician and get him to recommend a developmental pediatrician. By the way, sticker charts work for my son also. It helps to have a simple kind of reward for a certain amount of stickers. Good luck.
Kathy
I have a son that will be 4 on the 8th. He is special needs and goes to HopeWall in Aurora for preschool. The clothes thing, and the bothering other kids, he does not do, but the tantrums, hitting the door, hitting us screaming, and I mean piercing screaming he does do and it is so hard sometimes although, he has gotten better. And with moving him from one thing to the next, if he is not ready to stop, UGH! Look out. That has gotten better too. This past week was spring break and it was hard. He does not do good with that, as many special needs kids dont. Erik is almost 4, but more like a 2 year old really. He is about 2 years delayed.
Stacie Bailey CLD
Aurora
www.tendermomentsdoula.com
This reminds me of my son many years ago. He is now 20 and a chemistry major on the deans list at his university, so there is light at the end of the tunnel. I would check into the possibility of sensory integration issues. I know my son was overly sensitive to touch and sound in particular. Over the years, he did learn to deal with it, however, now I think there are treatment procedures for children with sensory integration issues. Perhaps you son would benefit.
Kathryn
Hi Traci,
It sounds like he may be struggling with some sensory issues....the new buzz word is sensory integration disorder...both my nephews struggle with this a bit...My one nephew couldn't stand tags or the seams in his socks...he also struggled with transitions....He's 9 now, and still struggles a bit but is doing a lot better....My other nephew is 19 months old and is receiving some therapies to help with speech and sensory issues......there are a lot of good books out there...I also was a first grade teacher but now I stay at home with my 20 month old daughter...I had several kids who struggled with sensory issues and with a few modifications to their schedule and their personal area (desk) they did very well....there's several books out there about sensory stuff....
If you want more info. I can connect you with my sister-in-law.
Maryellen
It sounds to me he might have some kind of PDD or something else on the autism spectrum. You might want to disscuss this with your docter. My son has PDD. One of his Kindergarden teachers were describing the same things. He did not know about personal space. He was having problems with social interaction. Does your son get stuck on one issue and not seem to let it go. I mean for my son it is like when he stresses out he becomes fixed on one certain thin. WHen he was littler it was boxes and robots. he had to have the same thing for breakfeast made the same way every morning. I hope this helps if you have anymore questions please feel free to email me at [email protected]