potty training Irish twins

secondchancer asks from Oskaloosa, KS
7 answers

Hi all, my son is 2 1/2 and we are potty training, he is on top of it and we are excited. My daughter is 18 months and while she does accompany us to the bathroom and watches curiously, she hasn't shown a ton of interest....but I am considering giving it a try just to see if she might go for it. With the addition of a small "treat" that my son gets for a successful go, I feel she is starting to put 2 and 2 together. She's always been pretty thoughtful and advanced so I think it might be worth a try. The thought of going through it once and being done is also very tempting! Anyone with a been there done that?

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7 Answers

Veruca Salt

answers from Birdsboro on

Kids potty train when they are ready to potty train and not a moment before. If she's ready, she will. But 18 months is too early, in my opinion.

I also think Irish twins is a really, really offensive term. If you don't understand why, research the history of it. Or maybe I'll just say you and your partner couldn't keep it in your pants and bred like rabbits - have you never heard of birth control? I'll guess you wouldn't appreciate that, just like I don't appreciate your antiquated judgmental term against Irish Catholics. Surely you can come up with a way of expressing that your kids are very close in age without that.


Brooke A.

answers from Saint Paul on

Let her participate as she wants. If she is ready she will train at the same time. Just let her watch and listen, she will decide. 18 months is quite young to potty train but my mom said I potty trained at 17 mos while she struggled to train my brother who was almost 3. I just watched and got it, I had no pressure or expectations on me.

1 mom found this helpful

Diane B.

answers from Westborough on

Ugh. I'd hoped we were past using terms like "Irish twins" which a whole lot of people are going to find offensive.

I think 2.5 is young for many kids, so you have to sort of hang loose with your son. His sense of novelty may well wear off. 3 or 3.5 is pretty common, and many boys (it seems) are closer to 4. I think the 1.5 year old is fascinated by the novelty, and it may also wear off. Maybe she's developmentally ready, maybe not (probably not - but it would be great if she were the exception to the rule).

What they see and find fascinating (including stickers, toys and books) and what they can do developmentally because their brains actually feel the "bladder full" signal and it kicks in the whole sequence of "bladder full/go to bathroom/pull down pull-ups/sit on toilet/let go/tell Mom and Dad" are very different things. If you can keep in mind that this is not something you can really "train" a kid to do (despite the "potty training" term we all use), and if you can find a balance between being happy they tried without any disappointment that they didn't make it or stick with it, you'll be a happier family. It's easy to get excited with initial successes (and who wouldn't?), and I hope it works for you. But knowing you'll very likely be buying diapers for another year or more can help you stay realistic. The truth is, you don't know until they're done that they were truly ready.

2 moms found this helpful


answers from Santa Monica on

I think your daughter is too young. She may watch but she may not get it.
Whatever you do, don't push hard and don't get frustrated.
FYI, the girl may get it first before your son.
Know this factor, it's a developmental timing thing...nothing else. So that means you can't push it and have it happen. It needs to happen naturally when they are actually ready. I think they are both too young.
For the boy, it will most likely be closer to 3 1/2 so you have another year.

2 moms found this helpful

Suz t.

answers from Sharpsburg on

if she's already going with you and showing interest, isn't that a good enough beginning? what more are you planning to try with an 18 month old?

i think i'd stay chill and let her interest develop at its own pace.

2 moms found this helpful

Margie G.

answers from Portland on

I have a similar situation to you with two of mine, and the younger of the two is advanced, so they often have learned things together.

Potty training however - no. They have to be developmentally ready for it I think (or it was in our case).

*mind you, we had similar experience to mynewnickname - with my first, I tried too early, and we backed off then we just tried later and it was immediate (like light bulb moment - sensation of wet, with needing to go).

So we did that with all of them afterwards. We just waited until we knew they were physically ready and also could have that Aha moment.

3 moms found this helpful


answers from Pittsburgh on

My older was really interested at 18 months, could tell me when he was going, etc, and I got very excited and tried it. It ended up being frustrating for us both - he wasn't physically ready and even though he had the right idea, he didn't have the control needed. After a few days, I gave up, waited 6 months, tried again and then he got it immediately.

So I would say you can try if you want to, but have low expectations, and if either of you start to get frustrated, back off and wait 6 months to try again.

4 moms found this helpful
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