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Q

"Friend Seeking Advice"

Oklahoma City, OK

I have a very dear friend, who has a blended family. I have been friends with her and her husband for years. Her family feels like my family. She has a child (older) who is ,to me, taking advantage of her and the situation, often. Now when this child is having a stressfull time so is she (understandable) but, this is my concern, she is easily irrational when it comes to this kid and the rest of her family. I mean she is more angry at her husband than the kid that is stressing her out. I don't know what to say to her, and i really could use some advice.

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Q

"Help" My Girl Is Really Fussy for No Reason That I Can See.

Provo, UT

My daughter who I love is driving me crazy. For a couple of weeks now she has been really fussy on and off. She does not appear to be sick in any way, no fever,no runny nose,and I dont think she is teething (?), nothing that I can see is wrong. She is not eating as well as she use to and spits everything out. She is really clingy and wants me to hold her a lot more then usual. I don't know what to do and I am really tired of her being fussy normally she is a very good girl with a great tempermant but latley I don't know what is going on and it is getting hard to deal with. Any suggestions of what I could do would be great.

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Q

'Only Mom' Phase?

New York, NY

I am 5 months pregnant and have an 18 month old who has become more clingy than normal. Now she won't let my husband do things he used to do (get her ready for bed, feed her, etc) if I am in the apartment. She cries if I leave the room, she even won't let others pick her up, etc if I am there. I am wondering if it is the pregnancy, if it is a phase or I have to deal with this potentially for the long haul. My question too is do I try and let her cry it out every once in awhile (i.e. cry if I leave the room or let her cry while her dad gets her ready for bed) so she learns it is ok if I am there but someone else is helping her, or will it scar her and blow her confidence and trust in my love. I know there is no perfect answer but wondering if mom's have done one or the other and how it worked.

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Q

-.- Help! Screaming Banshee Baby! O_e

Wausau, WI

My one year old has developed a truly nasty habit. Whenever she sees something she wants, she screams. When she doesn't get what she wants she screams. When we are in the room but not immediately holding or interacting with her - she screams! She screams whether she's excited or angry. These aren't just little squeaks, either. They're shrill, ear-splitting shrieks that leave us with terrible headaches almost daily. We try ignoring her and she only screams and cries louder (she doesn't give up). We've tried telling her "No!" and redirecting her attention. But we have 3 kids and don't always have the time to focus all of our attention on her. Have you had a problem like this with a child of yours? What can I do?! At the end of the day I'm exhausted and stressed-out to the extreme. Our downstairs neighbors are complaining about this too.

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Q

1 And 3 Year Old Won't Stay in There Beds Through the Night!

Seattle, WA

I have a 3 year old son and a 1 year daughter. I have always had problems with them waking up in the middle of the night and wanting to get in bed with me. I have tried many different approaches to this. I have tried to be stern and make them stay in there bed, but they'll just cry and cry and cry, so that never works. I've tried talking and explaining that everyone has to sleep in their own beds and why, but no results on that one either, my son started to get so bad, he wouldn't even lay in his bed to go to sleep in the first place. He would throw these monumental fits, kicking and screaming like someone was ripping his fingernails out. I recently moved my daughters bed into my sons room, thinking that may help because they are very attached to each other. Well, atleast now, my son will fall asleep in his own bed, but they both still wake up wanting to come to mine. I'm going crazy, I haven't had a good nights sleep in a couple of weeks because they don't just come to my bed and fall back asleep. They come in, flop around, talk, whine, play, whatever. I don't know what to do, HELP!!!

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Q

1 Year Old's Change in Sleep Pattern & One Other Question

Portland, OR

A little history: My 1 year old son has had a rough month. Christmas day, I started coming down with that nasty virus that comes with a cough, and he came down with it a few days later. Then, New Years Eve, he started with the stomach flu & it lasted over 5 days. The virus has now gone into an ear infection and he is cutting 4 teeth at once ontop of the fact that he's in a growth spirt. We started weaning him from formula onto whole milk a few weeks ago as he was turning 1. My little guy slept 4 hour incriments since he was born, and about 2 weeks of age started sleeping through the night. But, now, ever since he started with the virus, he is waking up at least once a night and sometimes up to 5 times. He won't go down without a bottle, but we have gotten him to go down to bed with just water, however, in the middle of the night, the only thing that will get him back to sleep is milk. We have tried everything we can think of: bottle of water, cuddling with him, rocking him, car ride, diaper change, bringing him to bed with us. I'm running out of ideas. Question: Any recomendations to get him to sleep better? Also, we have been trying to get him to take a sippy cup to break him of the bottle all together, so we don't have this bottle issue in bed, but we have tried the regular ones, the transition ones and the ones that have a nipple like a bottle. He won't take any of them. Question: Anyone have any tips that will help me get him to accept the sippy cups?

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Q

10 Month Old That Has 5 Teeth and Loves to Use Them

Boston, NH

I am looking for anyone that has experienced the biting of an infant/toddler and what to do when they are so little that they can not comprehend time outs? Our little boy is developmentally advanced, and has had his front teeth for a couple months, and has taken to biting when ever he is excited of frustrated. We tried redirecting, time outs and "No"s, all of which he seems to laugh at- what can we try next?

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Q

10 Month Old Throwing Fits

Houston, TX

I am a first and last time mother. This trait my son possesses comes from his father who has a quck and bad temper, like his father. I am a very patient and peaceful person. I am not sure on how to react to my sons full driven anger and rage, outbursts complete with full screaming with a high pitch that makes my ears flare and now throwing his head back. These anticts are brought on by me living a room, not picking him up after holding him, taking something outa his hand. I have been mimiking his cries, but I question that now. By him hearing me and me acknowledging his screams. Should i ignore the behavior and go about whatever as if nothing is happening?? Should I speak harshly the word SHHH; which worked last night?? Should i be soothing and empathtic to his tears??? Please advise

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Q

10 Year Old Behavior

Knoxville, TN

my ten year old, is having issues in school he hides his homework or says he doesnt have any, even though he does, and I have talked to the teacher, we have set up a communication system between us, however,now, I have been finding money in his bedroom and I don't know where he is getting it unless he is stealing it from me, I'm divorced for one year and his father is not active in his life, any suggestions or comments

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Q

10 Year Old Son Wets Bed Need Some Advice

Washington DC, MD

My son has a bed wetting problem. He uses an alarm clock to wake him up in the middle of the night to remind him to get up and use the bathroom, but that doesn't seem to help. In addition, he doesn't drink liquids after and that doesn't help either. His doctor refuses to prescribe medicine to help him because she wants him to naturally learn how to not wet the bed. I've run out of ideas. Any suggestions?

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Q

10 Year Old Takes a Long Time to Fall Asleep

San Francisco, CA

My 10 yr old boy takes a long time to fall asleep yet we have to wake him up in the morning so it is not as if I am trying to get him to sleep too early.We do calm things down fairly early but it does not seem to make a difference.Any ideas? Question number two is that he has been sleeping until now in a bed with my husband and daughter(too much squirming for me!).Recently we changed all of this and my daughter is sleeping fine on her own.But my son is really trained to having an adult body sleeping next to him as part of his comforting mechanism...any ideas on helping him switch to self soothing and falling asleep on his own? It did take him a long time to fall asleep in the family bed,tho,so I don't think this has changed cause now he is going to bed on his own.

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Q

10 Yr Old Being Mean

Seattle, WA

My smart, creative, athletic 10 year old is being mean. One of his friends from school told him they couldn't be friends anymore because of it. Last year his best friend at school also told him they couldn't be friends, so my husband and I are seeing a pattern - two separate kids, two separate years. Consequently, we have been talking with him about being nicer, things he needs to work on - like not being so sarcastic, and thinking about how OTHER people perceive what he is saying. However, tonight we were at my sister-in-law's house and he called my slightly chubby 12 year old neice "fat". Any woman knows what a horrible blow that is. How do I get through to my son? I don't want to raise a mean child. I know that I am taking this far too personally; he is entering the teenage years, but I feel like I have failed him. Any thoughts would be appreciated.

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Q

10-Month Old Boy Is Not Only Strong, but Rough

Denver, CO

I have a darling 10-month old son, who is my second child. My oldest, a daughter, is now three and a half. Both of my children were "easy" infants, delightful in every way. My son is showing the typical differences that one would expect between a boy and girl. He is much more physically active and noticeably "stronger" than she was at this age. The trouble is, that when he grabs hold of something like my nose, my cheek, or my breast, or any flesh - it can cause extreme pain and often times leave a mark. Sometimes he's clearly frustrated, other times he thinks it's funny. He's also a hair-puller and a head-butter and has gotten both my husband and I in the bridge of the nose before. OUCH! Once while nursing him, lying on my side, he reared up and headbutted me in the cheek, leaving me with a black eye for a week. By the look on his face, he clearly thought he was expressing affection - he's all smiles when many of these events occur, but it's starting to seem a little diabolical to me. To the extent that you can discipline an infant, I've given him the firm "NO" and put him down, left the room, etc. He does react like he's genuinely devastated and cries. I'm hoping it's "just a phase" and wanting to hear from other mothers that their once rough infant turned into a sweet cuddly toddler, who eventually got along swimmingly with everyone as they grew up and went off to pre-school. Is it too early to worry that he's going to be a little brute?? In general, he has a wonderful temperament and gets lots of loving attention from both parents, as my husband works from home. Aside from occasional tussles over toys, his older sister is very gentle with him as well.

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Q

11 Month Old Hits Adults in the Face

Minneapolis, MN

My 11 month old just recently starting hitting us in the face when we take her away from something she wants to be doing. Every once in awhile she will just do it out of the blue also. I usually tell her no, and that she has to be nice, but that is not working. I would really like this behavior to stop ASAP. Any suggestions on how to get it to stop?

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Q

11 Year Old Doesnt Remember

Houston, TX

I have a 11 almost 12 year old son who if I ask him to do something he forgets all the time.I know part of it is lazy,to involved in tv. That is my next question. I have taken away the tv for him but I have 2 year old also who watches tv not as much but Keegan will set and watch her shows just where he want have to read or do anything. It is a big battle to get him to read.I am talking yelling match then he says my eyes hurt or my head hurts. So no tv till you read policy doesnt bother him. Any suggestion?

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Q

11 Year Old Thinks He Is an Adult

Dallas, TX

My 11 year old son thinks that he should be allowed to watch any rated "R" movies, play rated "M" video games, have his own email address without any parental locks and create his own my space account or have his own website. Of course, when I tell him no I hear..."but all my friends can." He says that he doesn't understand why I am soooo strict. I tell him that it is because I love him. He gets so angry at me now. Up until now, he has never acted this way before. Is this puberty? I know that I am not the only one that thinks he is too young for these things, right? I told him that I hear so many bad things on the news about my space. His response was, "Why can't you just listen to me instead of what they say on the news." I do trust him. It's just other people I don't trust. Any advice or sympathy would be greatly appreciated.

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Q

12 Month Old Boy Having Temper Tantrums???

Chicago, IL

Hi Mommys! Hopfully your good ideas can help me. My 12 mo. old son has been a really easy baby to take care of since the start. Sleeping through the night, eating well, easy going etc.. I was pleasently suprised how well everything has always went. My husband and I try to be good about telling him NO since he has now been mobile and into everything. On the other hand when my little guy gets his feelings hurt because he just doesn't understand what he did wrong my instincts tell me to comfort him if he's upset. We pay LOTS of attention to him but maybe we shouldn't if he's misbehaving? Is a 12 mo. old even capable of misbehaving? I would say in the last 3 weeks he's been having screaming fits/temper tantrums. A week ago after bath-time we were playing in his room and when I tried to lay him down to put a diaper on he first tried to escape. When I didn't allow him to get away he had such a crying/breath-holding fit, he actually passed out in my arms! He was okay when he came to but this obviously scared me to death. I looked the episode up and it is actually called a "breath-holding spell" and is more common with 2-3 yr. old toddlers who are having temper tantrums. What am I doing wrong? I really don't want to ignore this behavior. When he's screaming because Dad walks out of the room or because he needs to lay down and get a diaper on his butt, I feel like things could get much worse if I ignore this. Please Help!

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Q

12 Month Old Screaming in Defiance!

Los Angeles, CA

My daughter just turned one a few days ago and I feel like she went from 12 mos. to 16 within 24 hrs! All of the sudden she started to arch her back, hold her breath, then scream when mommy or daddy say no or take an object that isn't a toy away from her. At that age, what can you really do, discipline wise, to be effective in taming the shrew!?! We are consistent with the boundaries we've set, which are not too strict or too lenient, so it's not like all of the sudden we're changing the rules on her. Any suggestions?

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Q

12 Month Old with Temper Tantrums Already

Louisville, KY

Hi, My name is A. and I have a little boy who is going to turn one this week. He has always been a very happy little guy, but lately he has been throwing temper tantrums. He does this when anything is taken away from him, anytime he has to put on his coat or when he gets frustrated with himself because he cannot do something(ex. he cant pull his toy out of the toy box). He screams, turns red and arches his back. I'm not sure how to handle this because he is so young. I just did'nt expect to deal with this so soon. I would appreciate any ideas on how to handle this.

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Q

12 Year Old Son Caught with Remains of Cigarettes

Elkhart, IN

Good morning parents. I need your help. My 12yr old son's father called me Monday night to tell me they found cigarette butts in his room at his house. I got wrangled into talking to my son's buddy's parents because the mom has been suspicious that her son was smoking. Well needless to say they are grounded from each other. so I couldn't take the not beleiving my son when he told me he wasn't smoking but his buddy swore "they were in it together" and wouldn't tell his parents where the cigarettes came from. My son said they came from his buddy's uncle and that he wasn't smoking just his friend. So being the mom that I am I went through his room and found an empty cigarettte pack and a lighter(that didn't work) between the mattress and box spring. Not a brand that I smoke or anyone I know. SO I confronted him. He said they were a different friends. So I turned that over to that friends family and told them what I was finding. The family told me they had caught the friend smoking and that he was blaming my son too. So he's not allowed to see that friend either. Now I had my older son move the tv and "fun" things out of my 12yr old's room and he found a broken cigarette like the one's his dad had found at his house. I couldn't get things pulled from his room until last night after he had already left for his dad's. what do I do. Dad suddenly has decided that he will "back me up" on what I decide to do for the first incident. and Dad knows about the second. but what do I do now that I actually found something that ties into what dad found. I just want to shake him silly and I know that's not going to solve anything. There isn't much else I can take away from him. He knows the consequences of getting caught at school. no sports suspension. He doesn't like that I smoke but he said at least I smoke outside. He hates that his dad smokes in the house. where do I go from here? I am so stressed out My face is breaking out in acne. My hair is falling out by the hand full and I am so frustrated I don't know which way to turn. Please help!!!!!

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Q

12-Year-old Son Caught Smoking

Chicago, IL

I recently found out that both my 12-year-old son and my niece (she is also 12) have been smoking with some of the other kids in my niece's neiborhood. This apparently has been going on for a couple months. Both my son and niece were grounded for a month after my sister and I found out. Yesterday I found out that my son was smoking again!!! I confronted him and he said he was sorry and wouldn't do it again. I don't believe him. What do I do? I am a single mom and I feel my son just walks all over me. Has anyone else had this problem????

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Q

13 Month Old Biting

Washington DC, MD

Hi, I was wondering if anyone could tell me how to get my 13 month old daughter to stop biting. Nothing seems to provoke her, she just comes up and bites. She mostly does it when she gets really tired, but its beginning to hurt out nightime routine. I have tried pinching her nose,moving her away from me and saying no. Any other suggestions would be helpful.

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Q

13 Months, Hits Herself

San Diego, CA

Hi, I hope this is normal. My daughter sometimes hits herself on the head. I try and tell her to love Lola (that's her name) and be nice to Lola, as to not put her down or make her feel like she is doing something wrong. Is this just normal 1 year old behavior? Is she trying to get a reaction out of us? I usually try and ignore these types of bahavor but I don;t want her to hurt herself. BTW, no one around her hits themsleves (even as a joke) and she is not watching anything on TV that would show this behavior, nor do any of the children she sees in her playgroups do this.

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Q

14 Month Old Tantrums

Chicago, IL

My son started throwing little tantrums when he was about 9 months. Usually just when getting a diaper change. Now he is 14 months old and getting worse. He is much more upset and difficult about it and he does it much more often. He screams, arches his back, pulls away, bounces up and down, shakes his head etc. This still happens with diaper changes but also when wiping his face after dinner, putting clothes or a coat on, when waiting for food, basically just when he doesn't get his way or has to slow down or wait for something. This has been happening in restaurants too now. Any ideas on what I can do? I'm not sure how much he understands at this age so I'm not sure what I can say to him. Should I ignore it? Or do I try to calm him down and distract him? Or should there be some sort of consequence when he does this? Like, taking his food away or putting him in his room? Thanks in advance for your help!

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Q

14 Month Old Tantrums

Kansas City, MO

My 14 month old son has started to throw tantrums. He has always been a strong willed child. They started a few months ago, but were rare and I could pretty well predict if he would get frustrated about something and either avoid it or be prepared to give him another distraction. Now it seems to be almost anything that makes him mad. I have noticed they are worse if he is tired, which makes sense. The tantrum is usually short lived, but they happen much more often & it is really tiring! My mom & mother-in-law take turns watching him while I am at work part-time & I know he does them with them, too. I know he is testing us & his limits. He is a VERY curious boy & gets into everything so throughout the day we are constantly having to redirect him, which often makes him mad. How should I react to them? I've simply been not reacting & trying to distract him with something or just allow him to lay on the ground (the tantrum includes him lunging his body back, crying & sometimes throwing something that is around him) and have the tantrum. Any advice? Thanks! FYI: I want to use as much positive discipline techniques as I can. P.S. I agree with a poster who said that my son needs more stimulation at times. He is very curious & smart & wants to get into every nook & cranny. Our home is childproof and he does have cabinets he can get into safely. The redirection is usually for things that we can't childproof and he wants to explore. I believe he is too young for time out as he can't sit still anywhere & wouldn't understand what is going on. Like I said, the fits are short (10-20 seconds or so) and if we redirect, it usually stops. There are times, though, that I just let him lay on the floor & roll around crying until he stops or gets distracted by something. I probably will start using the pack-n-play for a "safe" place for times like this. He already is a difficult sleeper so I don't want him to associate "time out" with his crib. I just wanted ideas about anything else we could do besides redirect and let it happen as I know he is only getting older! I know the grandmas are good at making sure he is safe & redirect when needed. I know they don't yell or get angry & just try to give him something appropriate to play with. He's just an active boy who is trying to voice his independence!! Thanks for the suggestions & support! I plan to read up on positive discipline soon so I can start using techniques & preparing for when he gets older!

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Q

14 Mos Old Constantly Whines

New York, PA

My 14 mos old son does nothing but whine lately & want to be held. He is going through a stage where all he wants me to do is hold him from morning to night. This is hard for me b/c he has a 2 1/2 yr old sister who never went through anything like this. I feel it isn't fair; I feel like I am devoting too much time to him & not enough time playing with her. Not to mention, I am hoping he will get over this and start playing on his own or with her so I can get simple things like cooking & cleaning done!!! ANY HELP WOULD BE MUCH APPRECIATED!!

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Q

14-Month-old Tantrums

Detroit, MI

I didn't think I would have to experience tantrums until my son was about 2. Is it normal for him to work himself up so much at this age? Why is he doing it? We have a very fun and loving home with as much of a routine as we can have. I don't know why he's suddenly freaking out. Help?!

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Q

15 Month Old Humping Behavior. Anyone Else Experienced This?

Dallas, TX

I was wondering if anyone else has had a son who humps until he falls asleep. At bedtime every night he pulls blankets or stuffed animals under him and humps for a good half hour until he's asleep. Sometimes he'll do it for up to an hour and a half before falling into a deep sleep. My doctor said its just a comfort thing for him but I'm curious to know if anyone else's boys have done this. Its been going on for about 6 months now and I find it so odd. Thanks.

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Q

15-Month-old Gagging Himself?

San Francisco, CA

Hi Moms, My son seems to enjoy the sensation of sticking his finger far enough back in his mouth to set off his gag reflex. He's been doing it now for a few months, and I figured he would just eventually get bored with it, but that hasn't happened yet. Obviously it startles me on occasion when he's not in my line of sight and I hear choking sounds, but inevitably he's doing it to himself. It doesn't seem to be doing him any harm. So will this just go away eventually? Anyone else's child had this habit? Should I worry about it?

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Q

15-Month-old SCREAMS Before Nap and Bed

Denver, CO

My 15-month-old daughter has suddenly started fighting any type of sleep with all her might. She is our second child so we have a definite, established routine before bed, etc. I can handle the evening fuss because it is brief but the nap "battle" is becoming out of control. She literally SCREAMS for 15 or 20 minutes in my arms before allowing herself to go to sleep. I don't even attempt to put her down for a nap until she is clearly tired - rubbing eyes, yawning, putting head down on floor, etc. I don't remember this type of screaming with my son even though he, also, resists sleep with all his might and basically want to know if this is "normal" behaviour and when she'll outgrow this. Any thoughts or experiences would be great! I'm tired of absolutely dreading naptime. My son got into the habit of only falling asleep in the car and I really want to avoid that route again!

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Q

16 Month Old Daddy's Girl Suddenly Can't Stand Daddy

Philadelphia, PA

My loving, happy 16 month old daughter has been an absolute daddy's girl since day 1. Her face would light up at the sound of his voice, and as soon as he walked in the door after work, it was like I didn't exist. They were adorable together. Suddenly and out of the blue, she can't stand to be near him. My husband went away on a 3 day business trip last week (which he has done in the past with no problems,) and since he has returned, she wants absolutely nothing to do with him. She screams when he tries to hold her, runs away from him if he walks towards her, and tonight threw a monster temper tantrum just because he was in the room while I was trying to give her a bath (which is usually daddy's "job.") Strangely enough, she pointed to pictures of my husband on the wall tonight and smiled and said "dada" (while my husband was in the room with us) but when I asked her where the "real" dada was, she wouldn't look at or acknowledge him. She just continued to point at the pictures. I just wanted to poll the wonderful moms on this message board to see if anyone else has experienced this and what, if anything, we can do to improve it. My hubby is devastated that she is rejecting him and I am sad for him (not to mention exhausted from 24/7 duty :) Thanks!

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Q

16 Month Old Is Undressing at Night, Waking up Cold or Covered in Poop

Fort Collins, CO

My 16 month old (youngest of 3) finds a way to get out of her pajamas every night. We've tried onesies under jammies, zip up jammies, snap-up jammies. She finds a way out of everything. We end up going into her room multiple times throughout the night to "re-dress" her because she is cold. We all end up more tired than we'd like the next day- but this is really just an inconvenience. This past week, we entered new territory as we've gone in to find her naked and covered in poop. At this point, we are beyond "inconvenient" and well into the health hazard category. Has anyone experienced this and found a solution? How do we keep our little girl from undressing so that she is warm and clean through the night? Thank you!

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Q

17 Mo. Old Son Playing with His Weiner

Las Vegas, UT

I know that is a horrible way to get one's attention, but that's what he's doing. My son is 17 months and constantly has his hand down his pants. I think it has gotten to the point where I need to replace all his clothes with onesies and footies, because that is the only way to get him to leave it alone (and he even finds ways to get past that!) The real problem is that when he plays with it, he leaves it outside of his diaper and pees on everything. This is especially difficult to deal with after naps and bedtime, because there is always a mess to clean up. Anyone have any advice? I have read previous advice on 3 year olds, but I don't think I can reason with him at this age.

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Q

17 Month Old Not Talking Much

Chattanooga, GA

I have two boys, my oldest is 2 1/2, and the youngest is 17 months. I notice that my youngest is not developing verbally as quickly as my oldest. By 17 months my oldest was speaking in short sentences, and could name all sorts of animals, all our close relatives, say please and thank you at appropriate times, etc. With my youngest, I don't doubt that he is intelligent, and I can tell that he understands us because he follows instructions and responds mostly with "uh huh" or "uh uhh" and shakes his head accordingly. He says mama, dada, tae tae,pop pop, ball, waves bye bye, but hardly ever says it. There are some things he has said, and then shows no interest in saying them again. I am wondering at what ages some of your boys have begun to speak regularly. I don't have any reason to think that there is any problem with his hearing, and he is developing beautifully in all other areas. He does still like to have his passie, though. My oldest always sucked on his two fingers, but it never kept him from developing. Nevertheless, I am considering taking the passie away, except for bedtime, in case it is to blame. I know all kids develop at different rates, and I probably shouldn't worry, I just wanted to hear from some of you in case you have experienced my same frustration. Thanks ahead of time.

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Q

17Month Old Acts Different When Around Mom

Minneapolis, MN

Here's my problem...my 17 month old daughter acts very differently when I am around. She seems to be more crabby/fussy then when she is just with her dad. We are married and live together but he travels during the week quite a bit(1-3 days on average). I work full-time so she is in daycare from 7-4 each day and then she is with me the majority of the remaining time. When we are both home, she tends to want to be with me more. She tends to want to be held more by me. I have stopped picking her up when she cries and whines to be picked up(for about the last month now). I feel like I am being quite firm and consistent with her. I make her say please(signing) for her requests(an no whining) and if the request is unreasonable(ex. wanting a toy when it's time for bed) then it isn't granted. A good example is when we are both home and I am workin g in the kitchen and my husband is ready to play with her, she will cling on to my leg or try to push me away from what I am doing all the while whining or crying. I tell her to stop pushing, I get down to her level and tell her "mommy will play later", I've tried ignoring her. I feel like we have a very consistent routine going on. She is a great sleeper, no problems going to bed. She is a great eater. This has been very frustrating for both my husband and I. Although this is going on, she can be very loving, cuddly, and playful. I'm not sure is this is just a phase or if this is a behavior that needs to stop. We are very frustrated! Any ideas to get her to be more independant with me around?

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18 Month Baby Has Stopped Sleeping Through the Night!

San Diego, CA

My baby daughter was the kind you could just put down in bed with a bottle, turn on the mobile and leave the room and she'd go to sleep on her own no problem. Lately for the past couple of weeks, she hasn't been napping well (waking up crying midway through) and at night she goes to sleep at 8 pm, wakes up at 1 am crying for milk and then again at 5:30 am. At 5:30 I have to hold her until she falls asleep or she doesn't stop crying and then regular wake-up time is 6:30 or 7:00. My husband and I have tried to give her water instead of milk at 1 am and let her cry it out but it doesn't work. Any ideas how I can get her to sleep through the night again? We are both so tired...

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18 Month Old and Hitting? What Do I Do?

Cheyenne, WY

I have an 18 month old that has started hitting. At first whenever he would hit me- I would yell, take his hand in mine and tell him that we don't hit in this house. He would cry give me hug and wouldn't hit again for awhile. Now he's started again- only worse- he hits, when he's angry, frustrated or even excited. he's even started to throw objects, pinch and scratch. The yelling at him no longer phases him. He looks down for a second gives me a hug and thinks that everything is okay. Other moms have told me to slap his wrist- but I don't think that hitting him to get his to stop hitting is teaching anything good. I am so frustrated I have no idea how to handle this. I would love any advice!

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18 Month Old Boy Puts Everything in His Mouth!

San Diego, CA

Hello, I am worried about my 18 month old son. He puts EVERYTHING in his mouth. When we're outside he eats dirt, puts rocks in his mouth, licks the ground, trees, eats grass, chalk--whatever he picks up goes in his mouth! It's very stressful for many reasons. I spoke to his pediatrician about it who ordered blood tests for anemia and lead toxicity (still waiting on those results) and she said she thinks he is just an "oral kid." I breastfed until he was 10 months old and then he suddenly weaned himself and that was that. I've read about pica and he seems to be too young for that to be a concern, but I'm exhausted and seriously stressed out about this. None of the other parents (all have girls) have experienced this. Has anyone else had this problem? And, is it even a problem or am I overreacting? Thanks, C.

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18 Month Old Not Napping...

Dallas, TX

I am becoming concerned with my son. He used to take a 2 hour nap every day at the exact same time. He has completely stopped and I'm worried he's not getting enough rest. He sleeps from 930 pm-8 am and it has been this way for a long time now. The only thing that's changed is that he's lost 2 hours of sleep per day. I just want to make sure he is rested enough. He gets a little tired and cranky during the day but will cry his way through it refusing to sleep. What do you think?

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18 Month Old Screaming!!!!

Oklahoma City, OK

My 18 month daughter was very quiet and I say WAS. now when she doesn't get what she wants she SCREAMS until her face turns red. I have but her in a chair for a time out and she will sit there and scream until she is out of breath. I have popped her on the butt, I have warned her with the fly swatter, time outs don't work either. I pick her from daycare and until she goes to bed its one big scream fest. i want our time together to be happy i get off from work at 5:30 and she goes to bed around 8:30 so we dont have much time in the afternoons. i miss my quiet child. is this the terrible 2's starting, how long does this last? this is my one and only child. does anyone have the same prob...HELP.

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18 Month Old Testing Me with Her Behavior

Indianapolis, IN

I am a SAHM and have 1 child, an 18 month old daughter, who is wonderful. She is still a baby, I know, but she knows what "no" means and some things she is not supposed to do such as pull on the blinds, climb on the dining room chairs, and throw her cup. She will do these things and look at me with this little "what you gonna do about it" smirk on her face! She gets time outs for discipline, but I don't think they are very effective yet. It's like she is too young to know better and I should still just stick to distracting her from these activities, but at the same time she obviously knows they are wrong and is testing me. Also, she makes EVERYTHING a fight! She has always fought going to bed, she finally goes at night without a fight but naps are a nightmare. She also fights getting dressed, washing her hair, getting in her carseat, and is very impatient while waiting for me to fix her meals. I guess all I need to know is that it is just her age making her a monster at times and that I am not doing something wrong! Let me know if you have any advice for me or at least let me know this is normal and I will be happy to work on ways to help her work it out.

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18 Month Old Won't Sleep on Own Anymore... Used to Before Vacation??

Austin, TX

My son, 18 months, has always been an independent sleeper. Prior to our vacation I have dreamed of the day he napped with me. I take it back! He screams till he starts to vomit, we pick him up he falls asleep the second he is put in our bed. Naps or overnight, doesn't matter, even let him fall asleep and try to move him. He either wakes up immediately or within the hour crying. I kept hearing it was because we were in a different, strange environment? Never mattered before. We get home today and I let him "cry it out...25 minutes later I told my husband this isn't working. Picked him up and he is asleep in our bed as I type. He has been in his crib since 6 weeks and always been a good sleeper...put him down and walk out. Where do I start?

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19 Month Old and Weaning from Finger Sucking

Houston, TX

My son is addicted to sucking his first two fingers. He is very tactile and when he touches anything soft, (hair, stuffed animals etc) his fingers instantly go in his mouth. He sucks them quite a bit during the day and at night too, of course. I don't think he can do this on his own. I am needing some ideas about how and when to start breaking the habit. I have not tried much of anything yet, but I know that as he approaches 2 I am going to have to get more strict with it and try to help him break the habit for his own oral health. I am nervous about this process, so any suggestions or advice to make it a more smooth transition for him and us would be greatly appreciated. Thanks so much!!!

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19 Month Old Driving Me Crazy

Boca Raton, FL

Let me first say that I love my little guy more than life......however, he is driving me nuts. He is at the age where he just keeps trying me on everything!!!!!! I say "no" he looks at me, smiles and does it anyway. When he does not get his way he hits me and my husband...and in public it is worse. Time out is sorta kinda working. What do I do in public? What do I do about the hitting? I already tell him no in a firm voice and tell him we do not hit...and then put him in time out. It is just not working that well for us. Does this end?????????????????????????????????

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19 Month Olds High Pitched Squeal/scream

Allentown, PA

Hello. My 19 month old has this terrible habbit of just screaming for no reason. I guess there is a reason, she is excited, wants something or just because she can. I am expecting #2 in 4 weeks and am worried that this is going to affect his sleep (and my eardrums). Is there any way to discipline her or make her stop. It really grates on my nerves after a couple of times.

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19 Month Suddenly Refusing to Sleep in Crib

Peoria, IL

For the past few nights, my 19 month old will not sleep in his crib. I've tried letting him cry it out but he will not stop screaming. My husband and I have to wait until he is in a deep sleep in our bed before transferring him to his crib. He's never had a problem sleeping in his crib before. What could be causing him to do this and what should I do about it? My husband and I are adament about not letting him sleep with us in our bed. Is it just a phase?

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2 1/2 Biting and Just Plain Right Being BAD

Milwaukee, WI

My 2 1/2 year old son has been driving me up the walls! He's been hitting and biting his aunts and uncles and when he’s upset with me tells me, “momma died” (family turtle died a few weeks ago). I don’t know what to do! I have another son, 5 months old, so I’m pretty much preoccupied with him most of the day. And when the older one acts up I just get so frustrated that I raise my voice and send him to his room. Obviously my disciplines practices are not working because he seems to be acting worse. Also, I do spend time with him playing and reading with him when his younger brother is asleep, so he won’t feel neglected. Any advice would be appreciated! – T. D.

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2 1/2 Year Old Acting Out

Chicago, IL

Help, I have to wonderful little boys, whom I am completely inlove with ... that are making me crazy. I've got a little guy 10mos and my other is 2 1/2 (birthday in January). All is well in general, however, I have become acutely aware that as the baby is becoming more mobile (near walking independently) and developing more and more a personality ... big brother, is acting out more and more - can't hack the competition ? The older will randomly go by the baby and bump him, take a toy out of his hand, knock him over (you'd swear they were teenagers, only the little one can't do anything about it yet) I've tried talking with the first born, we do time outs and afterward review WHY he went into timeout, and have him apologize and kiss baby. I'm trying to be consistent with the timeouts, to avoid confusion. But I'm also noticing some other acting out, negative behaviour that I think is coming because of all the timeouts. The boys are on opposite nap schedules right now, so I am able to really spend time with each at different times during the day. I'm trying to be very intentional with the play I do with the older, and really try build into him and speak positively to him. When we are all together I try speak out when I notice him making a "good decision" or playing nicely with little brother. But it's HARD, and after only a few days of trying to really be focused and intentional about it all, I'm exhausted. - My husband is very supportative of it all, but is not around much of the time. Bottom line, I'm worried, and I'm whinning .....

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2 1/2 Year Old and Naps

Philadelphia, PA

I recently started getting my 2 1/2 year old to realize that she can play in her room by herself (it's fully child-proofed). I did this because pretty soon she will be getting toys with smaller pieces that I don't want my 11 month old to get a hold of. I'm afraid I created another problem. Now she won't nap at all. I put her up for her usual nap and she just plays with all her toys and her books. She doesn't do this when she goes to bed at night and will go right to sleep but when she doesn't get her nap she is very difficult. Any suggestions for damage control?

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2 1/2 Year Old Girl Holding Her Pee for Hours

Los Angeles, CA

Hello all, I know something similar was posted recently but I have a very stubborn 2 1/2 year old girl who we are trying to potty train. This is our second attempt. We tried in the fall for about a month and since nothing was working, we stopped. Now we have started again and we have the same problems: my girl loves sitting on the potty and flushing and washing hands but will not let the pee come out! She holds it for hours and nothing can entice her to let it out. We are trying positive reinforcement: stickers, stamps, jelly beans, lollypops, etc. Instead she asks for her diaper in order to pee. I know this is fairly common but have no idea what to do. Her pre-school teachers are great and take her to pee every 30 min but same deal. All the other girls in her class are trained and she goes to the bathroom with them but still just sits on the potty and pretends to pee. Any advice or help would be so appreciated!!

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2 1/2 Year Old Playing with Food... and Not the Way That You Think..

Portland, WA

Ok ladies I have a problem. My youngest has a facination with taking butter, eggs, milk, and even mayo out of the fridge covering herself with it and rolling on the floor. I have tried 3 diffrent locks on my fridge, but she always finds a way to get into the fridge and grab something to play with. My 5 year old knows how to unlock the fridge and always forgets to put the lock back onto it. I dont want to have to put a pad lock on my fridge, but I am almost to that point. just this week she has covered my whole bathroom and couch with butter ( butter is sooo hard to get out of a couch). She always says she is sorry, and acts like she feels bad, but then when I turn my back she will be right back into the fridge. I am just beyound myself and just do not know what I can do.

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2 1/2 Year Old That Won't Stay in Bed

Kalamazoo, MI

I have a 2 1/2 year old that we just switched over to a toddler bed about 3 months ago, he was doing fine staying in bed up until the holidays when his routine got a little out of sorts. Now when I put him to bed he gets up over and over, we have tried everything to get him to stay in bed. Any suggestions? Thanks K.

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2 1/2 Year-old Constantly Interrupting.

Charlotte, NC

Hi everyone, I need some advice on how to get my 2 1/2 year-old to stop constantly trying to interrupt while my husband and I are talking, while I'm on the phone, while I'm talking to another adult. I have realized that since we have been trying to buy a house, move, etc., he has gotten less attention than usual and is feeling very lost. This behavior has escalated since all of this has been going on, so one change I am trying to make is to make clear-cut "playtime" and "work time." That helps him to feel more secure and he becomes a little less needy, but he still tries to ask me questions while I'm on important phone calls. I will let him know I have an imp. call to make, that it will be just a few minutes, and that he is not allowed to talk to me until I hang up, but he will still keep calling me and yelling questions. He interrupts all conversations between my husband and I lately. Now we have him go to time out if we ask him not to interrupt for the next 2 minutes and he still does. We also got a timer that we set for 5 minutes during which we tell him it's "adult conversation time," and that he will be allowed to talk after the timer goes off. He doesn't seem to really get it completely though. Any advice?

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2 1/2 Yo Throwing Things

Los Angeles, CA

My daughter has always been very active and independent from day one. She wants to do everything herself. And usually as long as it's not going to be dangerous, I let her at least try. She frequently will ask for help if she realizes that she needs it. But she has been getting more and more defiant about things over the last month or so. And for the last 2 weeks, she has started throwing things when she gets mad, or frustrated, or just feels like it. I usually can handle it with aplomb, but now she has started throwing food. Including throwing an entire cup of milk into the ailse of the restaurant we were trying to eat at. And the only reason I think she did it is that she didn't want to drink it. I was mortified. Fortunately, it didn't splash on any other customers. This throwing food thing is really new. I just tell her to say "no thank you" if she doesn't want something and 90% of the time that's what she does. But I just can't deal with her pitching food and dishes across the room. I've given her time outs and she gets very apologetic and cries. But then she does it again. Any thoughts would be greatly appreciated. And if this is just normal 2 1/2 yo stuff, then I'd be happy just to know that I'm not alone and that "this too shall pass", as the saying goes.

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2 1/2 Yr Old Girl Not Talking Anymore

Austin, TX

I have 3 kids, a boy 8, girl 2 1/2, and girl 9 mon. Well the middle child has decided not to talk to me the last week. Last wed, and thur her brother stayed home from school, he went back on fri, and thats when she stopped talking to me (or any other adult). She still talks to her bro and sis, and she still comes to me and is still nice to me, but she now grunts to me or whispers with her hand on her mouth to make her lips move. No big event happened, I think she is finally jealous of her sister. She is a quiet kid to begin with, but I don't know how to get her to talk again. I tried spending time with just her, I tried to not let it bother me, it just gets worse. She thinks she doesn't have to listen to me if she doesn't talk to me. I have never had to deal with this before. she will be 3 in march. I think my son talked when he was born! thanks for any ideas!

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2 1/2 Yr Old Neice Has Become Afraid of a Lot of Things

Richmond, VA

I am very concerned about my sweet little neice. Within the past 4 months or so she has become terrified over all sorts of things such as: Balloons, bar soap, wash cloth, bathtub (has hated the bathtub since she has been 1 or 1 1/2), twilight turtle (little turtle that projects stars on the ceiling), bowl full of Mcdonald's Happy Meal toys, Elmo Live(this one is understandable) and my two dogs(she has been around them since she was 6 months old and has never been afraid of them and they are not vicious or mean and have never hurt her, but I could also understand this one). I am sure there are other things, but this is all that I know of. When I tell her mother about the things that I have noticed that she is terrified about and ask her why or if she has tried to find out why, she just says "She is afraid of everything, she'll get over it." Part of me thinks that she acts like this because she doesn't feel secure or safe. It is very sad, but Her mother is always trying to send her off to the grandparents or anyone for the weekend and her mother doesn't stay home with her, so she doesn't get much quality time. In fact she has been spending the night away from her parents since she was 5 or 6 weeks old. And she used to spend the night away from her parents every week, so sometimes her mother wouldn't even see her for 2 days a week. I have a hard time understanding that. She also has an 8 month old baby brother now, so a little girl who wasn't getting enough attention from her mother before definitely doesn't now. I don't know if something is going on at daycare (it is a large commercial facility) or if it is because she doesn't feel safe and secure because she is constantly pushed aside. Please help!

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2 1/2 Yr Old Potty Training and Won't Poop in the Toilet.

Salt Lake City, UT

I am asking for my sister-in-law. She has a 2yr old boy that won't poop in the toilet. she has tried the underwear only thing and he refuses to go. she has let him scream for about 1 hour cause he had to go and she wasn't going to give in and put a pull-up on him cause that would mean that he got his way.she finally gave in to him and he went potty and stopped screaming. she has tried the getting an reward for going potty. she has tried many different bribes and he still won't go. any advise will be great!

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2 y.o. Waking TOO EARLY!

New York, CT

EDITED TO ADD MORE INFO we changed dd's bed to a toddler bed last weekend and she is exploring her freedom more every day. seems like she is waking 15 minutes earlier each day and coming in to the hallway calling "mommy". i try getting her back to sleep, but she is pretty wide awake, asking for breakfast. (is she hungry?) i realized i should give more info: dd is waking when it is still VERY dark outside... the sun has been coming up around 7am. also, during her naptimes, i shut her door and lock it (since she figured out how to open it with a little persistence) this has worked out really well so far. YESTERDAY and this morning, she actually stayed in her bed and called for me rather than getting up and coming to the door, or into our bedroom in the morning. we leave her door open at nite because it heats her room and our more evenly (the thermostat is in our bedroom across the hall). TODAY she woke up around 6am, so i'm hoping the early waking was just a part of the transition! (WHEN she wakes up, I may rock her and try and get her back to sleep, but almost always she comes into bed with me and dh for cuddle time...and sometimes does fall back asleep. Lately, however, she has been very wide awake and only cuddles about 15 minutes before asking for "ice cream"!... and YES, I do get her breakfast immediately upon getting out of bed ... I have done this always, since she stopped nursing, since that was the first thing she did upon waking before) i'm 20 weeks pregnant and NEED MY REST and would like to find a way to get her to sleep until at least 6am. i've heard of getting a digital clock and putting the number 6 covering the minutes next to the hour number... and telling them they can't get up until the numbers match... using an alarm or a timer on their light... what has worked for you? please help! darci

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2 Y/o Yells and Screams for Hours Every Day

Minneapolis, MN

My child yells for hours every day, and it is almost unbearable. He is two and a half and we are about to start receiving special ed for him for emotional/behavioral issues. He refuses to eat solid food, and is on a liquid diet. There is no medical reason for this, he just won't eat. He has terribly disturbed sleep as well, which seems to improve as he gets older. He does not change his behavior when he gets time-outs, positive or negative feedback, basically the "normal" parenting techniques that have worked on our older two sons. Hours and hours of this yelling is driving my older two children away and our baby has a very hard time napping (this yelling penetrates our walls, and we have a decent sized house). I beg anyone who has had similar issues to tell me what worked for them.

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2 Year Not Sleeping Thru the Night Now

Oklahoma City, OK

My son recently figured out how to get out of his crib. It is one of those cribs that converts to a day bed and then to a full size so it grows with him. We converted it to the day bed, which all we did is take off the one side of the crib and lowered the mattress as far as it will go. The first couple of nights were fine and he slept the whole night thru like he usually does but since then he is getting up 2 and 3 times a night. We have tried everything from rocking him to sleep and putting him in the bed to sitting next to the bed until he falls asleep on his own to letting him cry it out which right now he has more stamina than either his father or I. He will cry and scream for hours if we let him, I can only take it for about an hour and then I have to go in and do something or I dont get any sleep. If anyone has any suggestions, we will greatly appreciate them, my husband and I are exhausted. Thanks

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2 Year Old Acting Out After Seeing Father.

Dallas, TX

I need some input here. I have seperated from my daughter's father and we will be divorced soon. Due to issues that he has with alcohol, his current living situation and the fact that he just got his 2nd DWI, he only sees our daughter at my house under my supervision. He sees her between 2 to 8 hours a week tops. When he is over I try to give him some time with her by doing somethings in the other room while they play in the living room or in her play room. I have started to notice that she is acting out after he visits, by acting out I mean hitting me, not listening and screaming NO to me for everything!!! When he does not come around for a few days she is a perfect angel, she is so sweet, hugs on me, says please and thank you and we are working on our yes sir and yes mam. What do I do? Or do you think I could be reading too much into this? It's just so frustrating to one moment have a child that wants to hold my hand and says I love you mommy before her father shows up and once he leaves my daughter gets mean. Last night she hit me so hard in the eye that I was seeing stars. I don't know what to do or who I should talk to about this. Any advice is appreciated.

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2 Year Old Behaves and Is Fun with Everyone Else Except Me

Milwaukee, WI

Help!!!!! My almost two year old is kind of out of control! He is wonderful at daycare, with my parents, with my husband, but with me he is a terror. He whines and cries no matter what I do, and i cannot comfort him or distract him. He will not let me put him to bed, and when he does willingly go with me, I can't leave the room. So my husband has been putting him to sleep for almost a month now! I love my little guy, and I want to go back to playing trucks and coloring together. Does anyone else have expirience with this and if so how you handled it? I think it is just a phase, but my husband is constantly telling me I have to find a way to get him to stop acting like this, or make him go to sleep, or get him to calm down or whatever, but I have tried so hard with no results and I am just so frustrated! It is starting to have a negative effect on me. Thank you for any help you can offer!!!

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2 Year Old Daughter That Still Sleeps on Her Parents Bed

Augusta, GA

How do you get a 2 year old to stay in their own bed all night.... She will fall alseep around 8:30pm with no problem then around 1am she ends up in our room and we always give in because at this moment my mother is living with us and I know that if Kylee (my daughter) starts to cry it will wake my mother up. Should I just keep on giving in until my mother moves out or is there a way to do this with out Kylee having a fit? Please don't take this as my mother is getting mad or saying anything.... she does not say anything about kylee's crying at night; I just feel bad because I know that kylee can cry for a long time if I don't give in and I don't think it is fair to wake up everyone in the house because of one stubburn child.

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2 Year Old Daughter Wakes up TOO EARLY No Matter What

Portland, OR

Sleep is very important for healthy psychological well being and functioning. My 2 year old daughter wakes up TOO EARLY no matter what I do and I want to get her to sleep in a bit longer. Our work schedule is such that we can sleep in if we like, but my daughter is up at 5:30-6 seven days a week. If she is tired, she will still wake up and have a nasty day which is my biggest problem. She isn't getting enough sleep. I haven't heard any noises around the area that are waking her up at that time. My 4 year old son will sleep until he's good and rested, but my daughter won't. I go to bed earlier to get the required sleep, but I'd just like to move her back an hour, honestly. I've tried putting her to bed later.....nothing. Anything?

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2 Year Old Doesn't Listen to Me

Dallas, TX

My daughter is 2 1/2 and just does not listen to me. If we are walking and I tell her to follow me, she just fiddle farts around until I have to pick her up. Everything I want her to do is a struggle and I have to pick her up(because she runs off) and eventually force her to do the things I want her to do (bath, teeth, etc.). I don't expect her to do everything I ask, but are most 2 year olds this defiant or am I not being harsh enough or going about this all wrong? I just can't imagine doing this when she is older and it really wears on me.

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2 Year Old Having a Hard Time Going to Bed

Portland, OR

My son recently turned 2 and is really struggling to go to bed. He has never had a problem laying down and going to sleep on his own but just recently he will cry for awhile and we will need to go in and rub his back to help him go to sleep. Do you think he is feeling separation anxiety when we are leaving the room? He seems very clingy but I don't know if this is normal?

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2 Year Old Hitting, Kicking & Pulling Hair

Jacksonville, FL

My daughter just turned 2 on December 15th. She started a little part time pre-school in September that she attends 3 days a week for 3 hours each day. Other than while at pre-school she is home with Mama. The last month or so she has been hitting & kicking at school and even pulled hair. She is a sweet girl and she does not have any brothers & sisters so this behavior happens more at school. She is in a very loving pre-school and her class only has 8 children with 2 teachers. The teachers have been great at communicating with me about the behavior. They have used time out as well as completely ignoring my child for her behavior and then doting on the one that she hit etc. I am confident about the supervision she gets at this pre-school and that the teachers are working with my child & me in a gentle, firm loving way. I am sure this behavior was learned at school as is normal with this age. These children are all learning how we treat friends at this age so I understand some of this behavior is to be expected but want to find a way to help my child learn how to be with our friends. She has hit at me and I will place her in time out. This really does not seem to be very effective for her. I am looking for some other ideas to be a consequence for her hitting at me or the dog etc. when she is at home other than time out. It is tough at such a young age to come up with consequences that she can understand. We have had all of the "talks" and she will even say no hitting friends etc. But, I feel she is just repeating what she is hearing more than actually comprehending. I would love to hear some suggestions from all you expeienced Mommies out there.

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2 Year Old Not Sleeping in Own Bed

Chicago, IL

My son just turned 2. He was not sleeping in his crib anymore so we bought him a toddler bed that he loved for a few nights. Now (a week later), I lay in his room at night to help him fall asleep, then when he is asleep, I leave his room. He will then wake up anywhere from 1-3 hours later crying. My husband and I give him some time to cry, then we end up going in there with him to help him fall back asleep in his bed. He refuses to lay down and wants to go downstairs or into our room (we won't bring him downstairs, but do end up bringing him into our room to sleep) and he will fall asleep in our bed. After a couple nights of that, I thought maybe he was scared so we bought him a night-light, but no change in his behavior. Has anyone experienced this? I would love any thoughts or advice to make our nights more pleasant and to keep him in his own bed.

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2 Year Old Not Sleeping Through the Night

Boca Raton, FL

On top of my already bad sleeping situation my husband started when I was working full-time at night(my son won't sleep in his bed to fall asleep). I get my son to fall asleep with us then I transfer him to his big boy bed. He wakes up about 3 hours later, he sometimes will go right back to sleep if I give him his pacifier that fell out of his mouth. Generally the only way I can get him to go back to sleep is to bring him in my bed again. This is one of the reasons I stopped working full-time because nobody was getting any sleep in our bed. I have no problem letting him scream it out if it would work but my husband disagrees with it. My son when I tried it in the past(in his crib)would scream forever and not fall asleep. Now he can get out himself, what do I do? We need our bed back and our privacy!

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2 Year Old Not Understanding Value of Food

Madison, WI

I know this may be unreasonable to ask of him but here's the delimina. How do I teach a 2 year old the value of food. He will ask for more food, take maybe one bite and then tell me he's all done. He will even tell me the food is "trash". This makes me very sad, considering what a waste it is. How many families just don't have enough, and then we are throwing away food that he really didn't need in the first place. I don't believe in limiting his food. If he's hungry I want to be able to offer him food. And on the flip side, I don't want to force him to eat. He's a perfect weight, even a bit small for his age. I've tried talking to him about how some people don't have enough. But I think he's a bit young for that. Any ideas on how to encourage him to only ask for something if he's able to finish it, or at least eat a good portion? This was an english muffin he asked for. I only gave him one side, so I made it as small as possible. Before the even took a bite he was also asking for more bannana, which i did not give him b/c he hadn't touched the english muffin yet/

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2 Year Old Possible Attachment Problem?

Hartford, CT

We adopted our daughter internationally at 5 months old and she is now a smart and funny 2 year old. In the back of my mind though I am always concerned about attachment issues and recently some things have come up. She is super sociable and will try and go off in a controlled environment like a show at a park for example, with other kids/adults. I think she doesn't worry enough about where Mom & Dad are and my hubby thinks I am being silly. Last week, my sister and brother in law watched her for about 4 hours and they both commented "Wow, most 2 year olds wouldn't do that well without their Mom & Dad for 4 hours"....Now, of course they mean it as a compliment but it makes me think that we might have some issues. Or, for those with 2 year olds (26 months to be exact) is this a phase? She does seem very attached, will say MY Mommy and MY Daddy to anyone new she meets, makes good eye contact, looks to us for comfort, but I guess I'd feel better if she weren't so darn social! Last week at the park children's show, when we got there she saw a girl from her daycare class so she spent most of the time sitting with this other girl and her Mom, not with us. We were only a few feet away but she was completely comfortable with someone else. Thanks for any input you might have! C.

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2 Year Old Schedules????

San Francisco, CA

Anyone else with this problem? My 26 month old's schedule keeps getting later... and later... and later... I seem to be the only one in my mother's group with a child at this age taking a nap super late in the day. It isn't uncommon to have her down finally at 3, 4, 5 pm which then means she is up until 9 or later! No nap means ROTTEN behavior which makes me out of my mind crazy. We have tried just letting her go without a nap & going to bed earlier but then 4 pm until 7 pm is a horrible time in our house and she still doesn't go to sleep any earlier. Its obvious she still needs the nap.... but any suggestions on shifting the schedule? Putting her down for an earlier nap has not worked. Putting her down earlier at night has not worked. (Oh, and did I mention that I am 8 months pregnant???? I am exhausted and that isnt' going to change any time soon!) Thanks!

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2 Year Old Very Whiney, When Do I UseTime Out?

Sarasota, FL

My husband and I have diffrent views on time out. He tends to use it more liberally than I would like him to. Our oldest daughter turned 2 in March and is still unable to clearly communicate all of her wants and gets frustrated easily. She tends to scream and whine a lot when things aren't going her way. I usually try to get her to understand that I know what she wants but she can't 'have' it or 'do that' right then. If she gets it but doesn't like it and continues to scream I'll walk away. Eventually she'll get over it. He'll pick her up and put her in time out for it. I'm not sure I agree with that. What does everyone else think? He's very good with her, but I'm not sure that time out is the answer for her frustration.

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2 Year Old Waking up Crying at Everyday

Boston, MA

My 2 year old son takes a good nap (2 hours) everyday sometimes even asks for a nap. He wakes up from the nap happy playing in his crib until I come get him. He goes to bed fine around 8pm but for some reason wakes up early around 5:30am everyday and is screaming crying. If I go in first he wants dad, if dad goes in first he wants mom. We have been taking him in our bed at this time to try to console him and prevent him from waking up our 4 month old daughter who sleeps across the hall. We also try to get him back to sleep in our bed to maybe get another half hour or hour of sleep but rarely does he fall back asleep. Does anyone have any thoughts why he would be waking up on the wrong side of the bed EVERYDAY and any thoughts on how to deal with this behavior?

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Q

2 Year Old Will Sit on Potty but Won't Pee in It !

York, PA

My year old daughter will tell me that she has to go pee and she will sit on the potty but she won't pee in it. She would even take the bucket out and pretend to dump it in the toilet, flush it and rinse it out. I have a friends daughter coming over often and she is potty trained. So my daughter was is always watching her doing it. I tried to let water run while she is sitting on it. I let her watch how I pee. I let her run around nacked all day. But nothing seems to work. I just don't know what to do. Any advice ?

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2 Year Old with an Attitude "I Don't Want That!"

Chicago, IL

Recently (over the past couple days) my normally easy going toddler has learned a new phrase -- "I don't want _____!" He uses it for everything & doesn't even listen to what we're saying! If you ask if he wants to go outside he replies, "I don't want to go outside", if you tell him it's time for breakfast, it's "I don't want breakfast". It is constant and about everything! When we do ask him what he does want, he doesn't have anything to suggest, either because it's too hard for him to formulate a thought or he doesn't have the verbal skills to express himself. I have tried explaining that we need to use nice words and say things like "I want to go outside!" (to which he replies, "I don't want to go outside"). So then I say, let's be happy and use happy tones. His reply -- "I don't want happy" and then mopes around. I don't want to pay too much attention to this and perpetuate the situation, but at the same time I want to stop this attitude! Any help?

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2 Year Old with Night Terrors

Port St. Lucie, FL

My daughter has recently been having really bad dreams. The other day, she woke up from her nap screaming. When I went in her room, she was curled up under her bed biting her mat (I keep napmats next to the twins beds incase they fallout). Every night this week, and a few nights before the incident, she would wake up screaming. Now, if she sees a picture of her father (whom I absolutely do not bash infront of the kids)she screams "bad man". The other night, she woke up around 1 in the morning, crying. I pulled her into my arms and asked her what was wrong and she said "bad man get momma. bad man hurt my bubby". When I asked her who the bad man was, she pointed to the picture of her dad. They haven't seen him in about 3 months. Now, when she wakes up, she comes into my room and sleeps in the bed with me. Does anyone know what I can do to calm of these thoughts? I've taken the picture of their father out of their room, but that still doesn't seem to help.

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Q

2 Year Old Won't Listen

Tampa, FL

I could use some advice from other moms on encouraging my 2 1/2 year old to listen. More and more these days, he just won't listen when I need him to do something - right now the big struggle is getting him into his car seat. He doesn't want me to put him in (yells "let me do it!") but yet he wants to dawdle and take his time getting in. I find myself getting so frustrated, especially since I have a new baby too, and he's often screaming while I wait for the older one to get into the car seat. I've tried saying "I'm going to count to five, and then I'll put you in" and that sort of works, but I don't want to have to resort to forcing him into the seat. Does anyone have any advice? Thanks!

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2 Yr Old Getting Upset Almost Angry

Daytona Beach, FL

My 2yr seems to be getting upset over little things, like when her baby slides out of the little stroller, and when things don't fall into the place they need to. I've tried to explian to her to use her words not slam stuff down, or yell, but I don't think that is working, I today I've noticed that I do it... any advice on how to help me to stop so my little monkey will follow my lead? I get upset over nothing and I can't seem to pin point what or when... Help

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2 Yr Old Is Always Loud! Any Hints/suggestions on Quieting Him Down?

Washington DC, MD

My 26 month old always seems to be so loud. I try to quiet him down and get him to speak more softly, and he either doesn't, or he does for one sentence then is loud again. My older son was always so quiet that I never had this problem. Sometimes I wonder if he is part of the cause, because he always gets his little brother so hyped up, and because the little one has to be loud to be heard when he's around. Any hints or suggestions would be appreciated!

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2 Yr Old Is Fighting Bed Time

San Francisco, CA

Since my 2 yr old transfered to his big boy bed, getting him to sleep at night is a nightmare! He now shares a room with his brother(7), and he's on the bottom bunk. When he was in the crib he would go to sleep just fine, although he hasn't ever been one of those kids that sleeps through the night. Our bedtime routine is basically the same as before. Now every night he cries, kicks and screams and tosses and turns. This will go on sometimes for an hour until he falls asleep! Most recently he kicked the bedrail off the bed and fell out! I have tried to let him cry through it but, it is hard for his brother to deal with. I have tried comforting him which only seems to work once he has been at it for awhile.I will also mention that at nap time he goes to sleep in his bed without a hitch. Help, I'm losing my patience. Is anyone dealing with this issue, if so what has worked for you?

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2 Yr Old Sucking Thumb

Detroit, MI

My 2 year old sucks her thumb when she is tired. Her thumb seems to always be red and I noticed a rough spot on it, probably from where her teeth are touching it. Any ideas of how to get her to stop or how to heal it? My 5 year old spit out her pacifier at 3 months old and never looked back. I must confess, I sucked my thumb when I was little, but don't remember what my parents did to get me to stop. My Mom has passed away, so I can't ask her and my Dad doesn't remember.

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2 Yr Old up Before Dawn!!!

Tyler, TX

Mommies I need your help...I am SLEEPY!!! My son turned 2 in January and has always been a wonderful sleeper. He goes right to sleep in his toddler bed, and doesn't get up until morning. The problem? He gets up between 5 and 5:30. He used to sleep til around 6:30 during the week and around 7ish on the weekends. He falls right to sleep at night, so I know I'm not putting him to bed too early or late. We tried keeping him up later, and going down earlier. Neither has made any difference. Is there a way to change his little internal clock to sleeping a little later? He does nap during the day, around noon, which he still needs. We currently put him to bed at 7:30, but tried bumping it up to around 8 and even 8:30. Same result. Am I destined to be up before the sun????

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2+ Years of Potty Training and Still Having Accidents

New London, CT

My daughter showed all of the signs of potty training when we started it at 22 months. We did the "potty training in one day" method of stopping diapers cold turkey and having her run around naked from the waist down for days until she was controlling it. We did this over the summer and when she went to daycare again in the fall, she still needed to wear a pull up during nap and at night, but was otherwise OK. However, every few days, if not every day, or even more than once a day sometimes, she still has accidents. She turned 4 in August! There is no rhyme or reason to the accidents. She will be fine for a few days, then just be playing and be wet. She'll say she forgot. We've tried reminding her frequently, taking her, even using a sticker chart where after so many days of no accidents, she got to pick out a toy from the store. That worked for about a month (2-3 accidents total that month), then the novelty wore off and she'd go a week having an accident almost daily. Today she even went behind a chair and peed on the carpet. A "big" accident, she called it. She then proceeded to take her wet clothes off, rinse them in the sink and find a new outfit to wear before letting us know what had happened (which she did). So, clearly she seems old and mature enough to be able to handle it. We even had her urine tested recently to make sure she didn't have some illness causing it. We're not mad at her, but frustrated that we can't seem to figure out how to help her after we've been potty training for over TWO YEARS!

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2-1/2 Year Old Keeps Saying "Shut Up!!"

Los Angeles, CA

I have 2-1/2 year old twins. One boy/one girl. My little girl is pretty easy going, happy and usually cooperative. My little boy seems to ALWAYS be frustrated, on the verge of a tantrum and whatever we ask him to do, he'll do the opposite. About 4 months ago, he started yelling "SHUT UP" at my husband and I whenever he doesn't get his own way or he's frustrated even in the least. We have put him in the naughty chair nearly every single time. He comes off the chair saying "Sorry" and that he'll never say it again. Five minutes later, he's screaming it again. The naughty chair doesn't work. We are very firm with him and consistent. We are careful never to repeat that phrase, but tell him that those are naughty words. WE are beyond frustrated. It seems that he will NEVER get it. It now seems that he uses this phrase about 50 x a day. He's starting to shout it at our friends, and he just started pre-school for a few hours a week. Any suggestions? We are at our wits end! Thanks!!

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2-Year Old Hitting Me... Advice Please

Portland, OR

My very loving and communicative two year old has started hitting me when she gets upset. We are not a family that hits for any reason. Time-outs are the route we use to teach appropriate and inappropriate behavior. The hitting has been going on for a few weeks now. I'm sure it is in some way a response to the big changes she is going through right now. We have recently moved from the house she has always known as "home" in California to a hotel room in Lake Oswego while our new home in West Linn is finished being built. We will be in this arrangement for 6 more days and then living through the chaos of getting settled into our new house. I understand that she is struggling to vent some of her confusion, frustration, etc.--but hitting me is not the right way to go. We have had talks about it when she is not upset and she tells me that she's sorry and that she "won't do it again." However, she does do it and I don't know what to do in "the moment." This happens in the store, getting in the car, when she is already on her way to a time-out... any advice?? Thanks!

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2-Year-old Won't Sleep!

Grand Rapids, MI

My daughter wakes up at 6 AM every morning crying and refuses to go back to sleep. She goes to bed around 8:30 or 9 every night. I really don't think she is done sleeping because she will often fall back to sleep with me or her dad on the couch within an hour of waking up. We've tried leaving her in her room to cry it out but that hasn't worked either. If anyone has any suggestions, I would greatly appreciate it!

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2.5 Year Old Behavior Changes

Houston, TX

Please advise. My daughter is 2.5 years old and in the past few weeks has become a completely different child. She is not focused anymore at her preschool/daycare with anything that she does. Has developed screaming and hitting. She almost has the traits of a child with ADD. Does not seem to have any impulse control as well. I am stressed, and worried. She was diagnosed with a double ear infection and has been on med's for the past week. It was also brought to my attention by her DR that she needs to have tubes in her ears as well as her tonsils and adnoids removed.

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2.5Yr Old Not Listening

Los Angeles, CA

The last few days especially, my son has been ignoring me when i ask him a question or to do something. He thinks its funny and will laugh. I have tried time outs and i have tried talking to him about it. I am at my wits end with him. an example...He will run away from me if we are walking out to the car and laugh while he is doing it. I will ask him to come to mommy please, and he refuses...completely ignores me. I will count to three...and nothing. (i have tried to keep walking in my direction and ignore his behavior and he will not follow me)When i chase after him and get him to get into the car, i will tell him that what he did was naughty and he needs to listen to mommy. I have told him that he has made a bad choice and tell him what good choices would be. I dont know what to do. I have tried staying consistent with him and it still has no response with him. I'm sure its his age, but if there is anyone that has any advice that would be great! Thanks!

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20 Mo Old Taking off diaper...How Do I Get Her to Keep It On??

Seattle, WA

My 20 mo old takes off her diaper during naps or while she is playing. She hides in her closet and undresses. She knows how to unsnap her onesies and take off her pants. I would consider potty training, but we are expecting our 2nd baby within the next couple weeks. We also just moved which she seems to be doing well with, but we will be having relatives stay with us just after baby is born. So obviously too much stress to try and potty train now. Any suggestions on how to get her to keep her diaper on?? She went through this phase before around 14 or 15 months and stopped after she pooped in her crib. (Poop freaks her out if its not in her diaper.) Thanks

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20 Month Old Has Crying Fits When Daddy Comes home...normal Phase?

Atlanta, GA

My DH and I are trying to figure out what's going on with our 20 month old. She's started this new behavior that is driving us crazy. Up until just recently...like last week...she used to go running to the door to greet Daddy when he comes home from work. He was home for the last two weeks of the year and went back to work this week. Every evening for the last 4-5 days she has been extremely clingy after naps and when Daddy comes home. I excitedly tell her, "Daddy's home!" and she comes screaming to me, clinging to my legs and cries uncontrollably and only wants me. I can’t cook dinner with her hanging on my legs and pulling at me to be picked up. Daddy tries to comfort her and she just cries for me. I don’t get much “me” time so cooking dinner while Daddy plays with her is some “me” time that I enjoy…but now with this clingy child I can’t hardly go to the bathroom without a fit from her. Is this a normal phase? How long does this last? This also breaks my husband heart and I don't know how to fix it.

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20 Month Old Throwing Toys

Dallas, TX

Hello, I'm writing this for a friend of mine who's grandson is 20 months old. He's very sweet natured but recently he has starting picking up toys and throwing them at other people, adults and children. His mother has been working in a daycare and bringing him with her but they have told her that if she can't get this behavior under control she won't be able to bring him there because he is throwing the toys at the other children, hurting them and making them cry. They don't know what to do to make him stop. Do you have any suggestions?

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20M Old Throws All Food on the Floor!

Indianapolis, IN

Hi moms! I though we had gotten better with this but it seems that it has not. My daughter throws all the food she doesn't want on the floor and says it is for the puppy. I don't know if she really feels that she has to feed the dog or that she just refuses to have things on the tray she doesn't want. She also throws her cup, which has popped and made a mess. We constantly tell her NO, we correct her, explain, put her in time-out, in fact, as soon as she does it, she says oh oh no! nnoooo!!! It is really cute, but I stay very firm. I pick up the food and put her down as soon as she does it, I have tried being there as soon as she's done eating and picking up but she'll throw as she eats too...she keeps saying, puppy, puppy... and I tell her no, the puppy her her own food and show her the bowl.... I've even given her the option to put the leftover in the dogs bowl so she stops throwing it! Any advice on how to stop it? Thank you for any advice!

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