Worried About My Son's Development

I wouldn't worry too much as long as he is engaged when he plays and interacts. One of my 4 children did not walk until she was 16 months. One walked at 9 months - - - my 7yo that didn't walk until 16 months did need speech therapy, but athletically she is now the strongest I have - she is also the most beautiful ballerina of my 3 daughters... late bloomer - but worth the wait.

C., before you go out and try and get help, i just want to tell you, that yes, you are being a first time mom. I was like that with my first. He didnt walk until he was 15 months old, it drove me nuts. He didnt talk until he was almost 3, i remember his CDC teacher telling me he needed speech therapy, its scared me to death. He will be 5 next month, hes brilliant, i cant get him to stop talking and his speech, believe it or not is better then most 5 and even 6 year olds that i have seen. My daughter who is 3 and half, walked late too, but she talked early, and i have another little boy, he will be 2 in August, he started walking at 19 months. I guess what im trying to say here is that all kids are different, they go at thier own pace, dont push, dont rush, what i have learned is to let them lead, i follow their lead. Be patient, in a few months you will be laughing at how over parniod you were. :-) Good Luck!
A.

I am a parent educator and I know it can make you crazy waiting for your child to get to those milestones. At 13 months he should have sounds for things, but not actual words. An example would be "baba" for bottle or "da" for dad. If your son can pull to a stand and get into a sitting position he is still on track developmentally. Cruising is TOTALLY normal and dev. appropriate! It will come, but enjoy his "babyhood" while it lasts! =) Hope that is helpful!

Hi, I had some of the same worries about my son's seemingly slowness to walk & talk...it seemed to help him to be around other kids more, to see what they were doing...we did gymboree classes & went to the park more, basically. seeing the other kids walking & running around really motivated him to do it himself.

we also tried learning sign language for babies...there are classes available, as well as playgroups, or just simply the book...and some toys even teach it these days. it takes a bit of repetition, and you have to pay attention to whether your son makes up his own signs, too...but it really paid off for us, and didn't impede his ability to talk, instead it seemed to really help his frustration level when he wanted to communicate more than "baba" or "dada"...

kids develop at different rates, and your son is so young, it's hard to say if there is really a problem yet in my opinion...hope these ideas might help you.

The answer to "Am I just being an overly protective and paranoid mother here??" is yes. Deacon sounds very normal. I have known SEVERAL kids that didn't walk or talk until 14 months and beyond. In actuality, the longer he crawls, the BETTER for his LONG TERM cognitive development. The crawling motion stimulates the Cerebellum, which is the part of your brain that processes ALL of your thoughts. Dr.’s actually “prescribe” crawling to people with short term memory problems. So instead of worrying about him NOT walking, get down there with him and let him chase you as crawl all over the house.

As for the speech: AGAIN, don’t worry so much. “I just want him to be able to start communicating with me.”- you can teach communication in many ways. If you ask him to “go get the ball” does he get it? Then he is starting to communicate with you. If you want to try teaching him sign language, you could try http://www.aslpro.com/cgi-bin/aslpro/aslpro.cgi to learn the signs. Children can OFTEN sign before they can speak. My son used 6 regularly. The one’s he used were milk, more, eat, help, dirty, and water. He still (now 2 ½) uses more and help on occasion, which BTW, where the absolute most WONDERFUL signs I could have EVER taught him. Even the few people I’d allowed to baby-sit him pre-speech said that if they had another child they would DEFINITELY teach their child those two signs.

As long as he seems to be achieving new “talents” on a regular basis, then I’m sure he is fine. When in doubt, then you and his Doc should talk it out! If his Doc was concerned at his 12 month, they would have let you know. You’re doing a GREAT job as a mom. Keep it up and take care~ J.

babies do things in their own time... when my daughter was 11 mo. and not walking i was worried and went to my doc. he said that anywhere between 10 and 18 mo is when children will walk...so, don't worry you still have time for that. as for the talking, my neice didn't talk until she was almost two. she is now two and a half and we can't get her to keep quiet. she just started talking one day out of the blue and hasn't stopped. I think that they try to drive us nuts even at the earliest ages... he he he. I think that he will be just fine but if you are worried take him to your ped.

1st of all a mother can never over react when it comes to her child! Better safe than sorry I always say.Well from what youv'e said it sounds like your son is fine to me!I have two kids and they both were different.My daughter was on formula till 1yr. 3 mos. she also started walking at 1yr.and 3 mos.before then she had slow motor skills for her age.My son ate a Steak dinner at 7 mos. old he's been a meat and potato man ever since.He started walking at 9 mos.I've come to realize kids develop at their own pace! Who cares what the Doctor's paper on Ages and stages for babies says! those are only approxies! Your son sounds right on target to me but if you really are worried it helps to write a list down of your concerns and ask his pediatrician.Like I said a mother knows her child best!.

K.

Hi-

I know how you feel. I used to work w/kids w/disabilities before having our 2 boys -6.5yrs & 2yrs- & had my older son diagnosed w/everything under the sun before he was 3 months old! So, you're just being a first time mom. There are so many books out there to bombard us w/information....specifically about how our kids 'supposed' to be developing. I think it's too much information & can cause us new moms too much stress so I stopped reading them & realized our son was developing just fine! Our second son isn't much of a talker....lotsa babbling & word-approximations. Even tho he's our second & I'm a 'seasoned mom' (HA!)I was still worried but then let it go cuz we've realized he's just a more gross motor guy & wants to climb everything & follow his big brother around. If your ped. isn't concerned, then you don't need ot be concerned. Good luck & enjoy your little man!

MY son didnt talk much at 1, at 18 months he said 10 words or so and then one day he woke up and he could talk. I think boys do develop speech a little slower than girls, but I wouldnt worry too much at this point. Walking, I think that just "clicks" one day too. Some kids walk at 10 months and some not til 18 months. Every child is different and its hard not to compare yours to what other kids the same age are doing. He is making dada and baba sounds so it seems he can hear and mimic he just chooses not too. You can always put a call in to the Dr., I call the nurse help line almost weekly and I have 3 kids. He sounds like things are going great though, and trust me in a month or two you will be wishing he couldnt walk or talk so much. (in a good way)
Good luck
C.

My son is fourteen months and although he walks, he doesn't say a word either. Just want you to know you aren't alone. I try not to worry because kids are so different. I think the main thing you should rule out is hearing. Does he know his favorite toys? If you ask where his ball is does he look for it? Does he respond to his name? If you are certain he can hear just try to be patient. Again, you are not alone. It happens and it is far more normal than people make it out to be, at least I hope so.

My son was the same way (he's about 15 or 16 months now). He would cruise and pull up and crawl, but wouldn't walk. One day he just let go and took a few steps. Now I'm considering getting him a leash! lol He still doesn't talk with real words, but he has sounds. Usually he'll point at something and say "unh!" and that's about all I get out of him. But, the way I know that he's okay is that he knows what things are. If I ask him where Daddy is, he'll point to him. I ask where Mommy is, his ball, the moon, etc., he knows what they all are and what they're called. Lately he's been really creative. My husband has a few radio-controlled hobby catalogs and my son flipped through one and saw a picture of some diagnostic thing. Well, it looked enough like my solar-powered calculator that he pointed at the picture and motioned toward the calculator. I've also heard from several older people that boys seem to not talk until later and then they just start spouting words.

Ultimately, go with your instinct and if it really bothers you that much you can see about getting him evaluated. But, honestly, he sounds normal to me just by what you wrote. Best of luck.

Not sure where you live, but I think all states have agencies that give FREE services (physical therapy, speech therapy, etc.) and free assessments to children with developmental delays. I had a very good experience with IMUA in Hawaii, I'm sure your state has something like this. Ask your Ped. about it and do something about it soon, because FREE services will stop when your kid is 3. My daughter received speech therapy and quickly responded. Chatterbox now. Don't be afraid of any "labels" that might be attached to your kid ("delayed" for instance) or whatever, because you are doing what you need to do to help your child. This is your job to make it happen. Good luck!!

Your son sounds just fine to me. Some kids are slower with words, especially boys. And if he's standing and cruising, walking is not far behind. I'd talk to your doctor at your next wellbaby visit about your concerns, but he sounds perfectly normal to this veteran mom. Take care!

Hi C.,

I completely understand about your worry. Any mom would. To reassure you, my 2 youngest children didn't start really walking until 14 months. I also had a concern about my son's hearing so I had him tested. My advice would be to talk to your peditrican. If he or she feels there are some delays there is testing that can be done. Hope all is well.

As long as your son understands you and their is communication. That is most important because his speech is still developing. I knew my daughter had a hearing problem at 12 months because our line of communication wasn't working.
My second son didn't walk til he was 16 or 17 months. He is just one of those kids where he won't do things until he can get it right. All kids develop differently! Trust your instints. It sounds like he is fine, though.
K.

C.,

If you are in Nevada, call Nevada Early Intervention (if you aren't in Nevada, ask your pediatrician, there should be a similar service where you are at) and ask for an evaluation. The evaluation is free and if your son needs services, the services are free. My son didn't talk, didn't talk, didn't talk and I kept asking my pediatrician who kept telling me to wait (and wait and wait and that went on until he was two and still not talking). I finally got the referral for early intervention and then found out that you can self-refer (I didn't need to wait for my pediatrican at all). FWIW, 2 years later we now know that my son is autistic. I'm not saying yours is, but I am saying that if you are concerned, get the evaluation. If he needs some help, it is available, and if they evaluate him and think he's doing fine, at least you can quit worrying about it. My second son is almost 8 months old and seem developmentally on target but I'm going to have him evaluated at 12 and 18 months just to be sure. Because I can and because it will make me feel better.

Good luck!

T.

C....

It is perfectly normal to worry and overreact with your first kid. We ALL do it. My daughter didnt even take her first steps til she was about 14-15 months old. She didnt even get her first tooth till she was 15 months old. Every child grows at a different rate and reaches every milestone at different times. If you are concerned then make an appointment with your baby's doctor. Until then dont get concerned. I am SURE there are going to be moms on here who are going to go crazy about it being neurological and all sorts of crazy things. Dont go there until you need to go there. Just go see your doc and then do the worrying. Good luck and dont worry.

I would agree to trust your instincts, however I do know of three moms whose kids are about 15-18mos and one isn't walking yet but is fine, one (mine included...he's 16mos) doesn't talk more than "unh" because it gets him what he wants and the other just sits and laughs while the other kids run around...and they're all fine....also I had a friend whose son didn't talk til he was almost 2!

Definitely trust your instincts but remember that all kids develop at their own pace.

my twins didn't walk until they were 14 and 14 1/2 months old. they did have a handful of words at that time, but it wan't until they were 15 months old that their vocabulary took off. i am sure deacon is fine! but if you are concerned i would ask his doctor.

C., Trust your instincts, I think this is always the best advice for new moms. Others may dismiss things, but I think it's always best to get it checked out when you feel somethings not quite right or just suspect. Also, seek second opinions when you feel a doctor is not giving your concern the full attention it deserves. Pediatricians are not experts in developmental disorders and many things that should be treated are not detected--from my own personal experience. Early detection is best!

I'm not trying to alarm you, and keep in mind there is a wide range where kids can fall that is considered "normal." That being said, I feel an honest answer is to go with your gut and watch your son's development closely and seek professional assesment if you're unsure because you know him best. Hope this helps.
J.
www.workathomeunited.com/jillman

I wouldn't worry, all kids develop at their own pace. My oldest son didn't walk until a week after his first birthday, my middle child who is also a boy started walking at 9 months, and my youngest (daughter) didn't walk until almost 14 months exactly (she didn't even cruise the furniture...just crawled). With my family the sex of the child as well as how many children are around didn't seem to influence when they did things....they did it when they were ready. As far as talking....my oldest was a late talker but had a problem with his teeth so may have talked earlier, my middle was a very early talker and by two years you could understand him and have a conversation with him that would be hard with a four year old lol, and my daughter....she just turned two and is finally starting to build a vocabulary. She didn't say her first word until 18 months and has slowly added to it (which surprised the pedi because she is a very vocal child, just not many words yet). Just keep doing what you're doing.....you are doing everything right and before you know it he'll be running and talking in sentences. It's not a bad idea to rule out his ears, just so you know everything is good there, but I'm sure everything is fine. HTHs

I wouldn't worry, he sounds like a normal developing child, do you bring this up to your pedi. when he goes for well baby check ups.. my son is 15months old and all he says is tat like for "that" and he points and food, bottle, me, plains, cars and just says tat he babbles mom and dada but doesn't point at us and use it like he know what he is saying I wouldn't be too worried but I definatly would bring up your concerns to your next Dr. Appt.

No need to worry I've been told kids will do things when they are ready, I have a 16 month old son whom is developmentally delay in a lot of motor skills, he is not walking, he is not even standing on his own , he has a few words,like Mamma, Oh Dear, Hi, and babbles alot, he is a happy healthy, smiling beatiful little boy who I cherish everyday no matter what he isn't able to do, just trive on the good things

It doesn't sound like there's anything wrong with your son. My son who is 7 now, when he was a baby, he didn't crawl till about 12 months and didn't stand until one day he got up and started walking. My second son who is now 3, walked until he was about 15 months, that used to concern me. Each child has their own time. Your son will one of these days just get up and start walking and you'll be surprised. As for the language, well he babbles and that's good, he is now hearing all the speech around him and one of these days as well, he will start to say words. Repeat everything to him slowly and clearly, that he can see your mouth when you say it. Good luck, and enjoy your baby.

Dear C.,

He sounds like a great kid to me. Since he is walking around furniture, then he will be walking on his own soon. You don't need to teach him, but help him along when he wants it. One day he will just stand up all alone in the middle of the room, and then sit down quickly - that is a mile stone and he will progress from there. I still remember the thrill it was for me at the age of 13 when my baby brother started walking. It seems like a long time when you are waiting for these precious times.

Deacon is doing fine with his talking too. In fact, you have a while to go before you hear his true voice. That will be a thrill too. My gr grandson started 'talking' early, then dropped the whole thing, now at 2 3/4 he is talking like a big boy. So, just enjoy. I am sure that the other mommies will have great advice for you, that is all I know. Sincerely, C. N.