Working and Motherhood

My great grandmother had her own business on 34th St in New York. My grandmother had her own business. My mother worked in the family business. I have been in private practice so long I don't even count the years anymore. My daughters are working mothers.
What is new about mothers working? What's the guilt? 7% of all mothers are not employed outside the home.

I work full time. It has helped my family enormously, and I am a better mother when I work. I have no regrets, in fact I love it. My children are now 3, 5 and 6.

I work and my family is much better off for it. My kids are happy and well loved. We get time in the evenings with them and on the weekends.

One of my close friends is a SAHM and we have this conversation a lot. We both see the difficulties on both sides on the fence. She stays at home and never gets a break from her kids. I work and don't get as much time as I'd like with my kids.

I also work on my MBA in the evenings and all 3 of my kids are in activities...so it's nonstop.

Why have guilt for bettering your family? Do you have someone you trust to watch your kiddo? If I didn't have that I'd forclose on my home in a heartbeat to be there with them.

I'd wait. I just posted on a similar topic. I have a lot of balance in my work schedule (like you). My youngest is 4. I'd like to get her through K before I work full time. At the very least I'd like to get her into K before I go there. Like you said you will never get the time back.

With my first, I had to work 6-7 days a week to make ends meet waiting tables. I would give ANYTHING to have that time back!!! I barely saw my dd from the time she was 1-4. Sad. :(
When we were better off and our 2nd was born, I decided to stay home with her. I will NEVER regret the time that I had with her. EVER.
I did work from hom watching kids, so that helped. I still watch kids and still can't imagine sending her to kinder in 2013. :(

Well, I have been a FT working mom since my son was 6 months old. Am I thrilled about it, no. But I will say it has worked out a lot better than I thought it would. I still get a halfway decent amount of time with my son. (Although, i am very fortunate to have a super short commute, take a short lunch, and his daycare is on-site at my work, so all that really helps). We have a wonderful bond and he is SO loving toward my husband and I even though he spends a little more than half his waking hours in daycare 5 days a week.

We have plenty of money on hand for the things we need and occasionally want. I know people say money doesn't matter but it sure does make life easier when you're not stressing about bills, watching every penny and feeling guilty about any fun spending, etc. If I didn't work that is what we would have to deal with.

Our home....well, it's pretty messy and even downright dirty much of the time. I really do not have the time to keep a nice home, cook, etc. the way I would like too. Oh well....that stuff is not more important than playing and just hanging with DS when we are home so it will have to wait for now.

Anyway, that's just my little situation. You have to do what's right for your family. Weigh the need for the extra money/benefits against the time away from your child. Good luck!

Maybe make a lists of pros and cons to help you decide? Good money and benefits in the current economy seems like they would be a big draw.
if I could ever work again and had the chance I would likely take it, but my youngest is 13 so my take probably doesn't help you much..

I am a FT working mom and I love my job. I do miss my youngest during the day, but she stays with two loving grandparents that absolutely adore her while I work. Do what you think will make you happy. A happy mom is a good mom.

I would say it totally depends on what care-giving arrangements you have. Will your kids be fine without you. Will they be taken care of, learning properly, fed good food, having their needs met? I think this is the only question that matters in this case. If you can find good childcare - go for it.

Here's my bias: I'm a SAHM. I've been a WAHM, WM, and I'll undoubtedly switch up my status from time to time again. Toe in every pool. For some time in each slot (years in each). Each has it' benefits and drawbacks. :)

I think working & motherhood is identical to working & fatherhood.

Except for the peculiar belief society holds that it's somehow different.

I don't know what I would do... it would depend on a LOT of factors, which change rather drastically in my own life year by year. I've worked because we've needed the money, I've stayed home because the money wasn't worth it. I've stayed home full time because I've wanted to, and I've worked because I've wanted to.

Really, in my experience, there is no "right" answer, except for whatever one you make.

PERSONALLY... I found that working full time suited my family best when my so was a toddler. Why? Because he was napping, and those naps made my work life and home life pretty "equal". He spent about the same time in care and the same time with me. It was a fun balance. Once he hit school... I only GOT three hours a day with him (I'm not including the hour of 'morning madness' where it's the 'get up-get dressed-eat-out the door-dropping off'... in his 12-13 hour waking day he was in school for 8 of them, and transported for 1-2 hours... leaving me 3 hours with him TOPS), and he was exhausted. Working full time for K would have been a nightmare. For other families, it's a perfect fit.

REALLY. No. Right. Answer. There are too many variables with needs and personality.

if I could choose, I would wait until KG. It's only 2 years.....

For just a few more hours? What does that mean? One more day? A 4 day week? Have real understanding of what is involved. It's up to you if you want to work full time. I truly don't think we can help you here to know what you really want.

Dawn