Won't Sleep in Her Room...........

HI there,

my little one is sleeping in his room already, but my sister dealt with this same issue, and she did a gradual change from her room to her son's. She started with sleeping on the floor of her room next to him, then they slowly progressed with the lattress on the floor going down the hall, he was on the mattress, until they ended up in his room after about 2 weeks, then he transistioned to his bed...just an idea

M.

My husband and I are in the same boat. My son will be 4 in November and he sleeps in his own toddler bed in our bedroom. After doing everything I could think of, including sleeping on the floor next to him, I gave up and put his bed in our room. I don't have any good advice for you-but you are not alone!
T.

I had the same problem with my oldest 2.... After they would fall asleep in my bed with me, I would move them into their room..... It is a big adjustment for them. Keep that in mind... it is a scary thing for them at this point....

But what I also did, is at bedtime, I would sit with them for like 15 minutes in their room with them with the lights out. Then I would walk out. It took them about 2 weeks or so before they realized that it was ok to be in there, but I explained to them that I was right next door. When they would wake up in the middle of the night screaming, I would just call them into my room so they would learn where it was. When they would fall asleep again, I would move them back into their room.

It is a learning process for them and it is a h*** o*e. Espically for them. It may seem h*** o* you too getting use to it but they also need to learn that they will be ok. And it is tough for them....

And sometimes, you need to let them cry it out too.....
T. K

I went through the same thing a while back. My daughter and I shared a room at my parents while I was working and going to school full time until a month before she turned 3. When her father and I married we moved here to Tucson and she was getting her own room. It was tough at first but we read her a bedtime story and let her watch a movie until she fell asleep. She had a night light in her room and slept with the door wide open. When she would wake up crying or come into our room we'd put her back in her bed tuck her in again and tell her everything was fine. She was finally good to go in a few weeks. We just didn't give in, I know it's hard trust me I wanted to let her stay in the room everytime she came in crying but I knew if it was going to work we had to let her know she had her own room and she was a big girl. Good luck and don't give up..

there has been some real good advice so far, but i found out that if you put a tv w/vcr/dvd in the room and let them pick out a movie to watch at night they fall asleep eventually . Or if that is not an option and tell your daughter that you will read her a book but she has to stay in her bed after. also make sure you have a bright night light and keep her bedroom door wide open. My 9 1/2 year old still wants the bedroom light on till he falls asleep also i tell him that if he doesnt fall asleep within a certain time 1/2 hr or 1 hr of tv on then i shut it off.
every child is different so hopefully all the advice you are getting helps.
L. M. mother of 4

My daughter is four also and I recently went through the same thing. I started with her sleeping in her own bed but in the same room as me and that worked really well. When she was really good with that she started in her own room. The first night I slept the entire night on the floor of her room. Then from then on she had her night light and the radio on with mello music, KOSI 101.1, she would talk to me while I was in the living room and she was very upset for the next few nights. By the end of her first week in her own room she was just fine as long as she had her night light, music, favorite doll, and new that I was right in the other room if she needed anything. Hope this helps. Good luck!

Oh yes I've been through this! My first child slept with us until she was five and would not sleep anywhere else. Then one day at five years old, she said Mommy I want to have my own room and that was it. I wouldn't make a big deal of this. Let her continue to sleep with you. She'll get to the point where she wants her room. It's an emotional comfort to be with you right now! And I'll tell you what, pretty soon they become teenagers and barely want to see you so I think it's nice right now! My child is now seven and she occasionally will sleep in our bed. My two year old still sleeps in our bed and calls it "My bed."

Hi Berna,

Well my kiddo slept with me and Juan until he was 2. We have his toddler bed in our room still next to our bed, we sleep with a nightlight on. It's rough sometimes at night because he doesn't want to stop talking or playing in bed. I am painting his room and making it a buzz lightyear theme. I plan to move him in before Thanksgiving. I'll let you know how it goes and maybe you can move her bed in your room, maybe it'll work for you and Alina. It'll happen but probably on her own time.

My friends were having this problem with a 2 1/2 yr old for a while.... they put a matress next to their bed and then each night moved the matress a little further away from their bed and closer to the little ones room then eventually she was in her own bed. It worked for them, maybe it can help you.

Hi B. -

I recently went through a similar situation with my 3-year old son after having let him sleep in my bed while he was sick, and I thought I would share a solution that worked for us. This is a tough one, as it's easy to give in when it's 2:00 in the morning and you just need to get some sleep! I implemented a reward system. For every night my son stayed in his bed all night, he got a sticker. When he had accumulated 10 stickers he was allowed to choose a small toy. This worked so well that after the 10 nights he was accustomed to sleeping in his bed and we did not need to repeat the process. As a single, full-time working Mom myself, I understand that every minute together is precious, but sleeping well is also very important for both of you - good luck!

Wow. Unfortunately, I will soon be in the exact same shoes you're in. So when you do get past this, please let me know what helped you so that I can try it when my time comes. But I was thinking of moving more slowly. Have you tried putting her bed in your room? This way, she'll learn to sleep in her own bed, yet she'll still be in the same room with you, where she's more comfortable. Then, after she's gotten used to sleeping in her own bed, you can try moving it into her own room. Please let me know what you find works for you, whatever you decide to do.

Hi,

Well my daughter never actuall slept with me I had her crib and then toddler bed next to mine even though she had her own room since birth. Silly right? Anyway, I fianlly got her a twin for her room and told her that she had to sleep in her bed the days mommy worked and on my days off she got to sleep with me. That sleeping with me was special but that big girls sleep in their own room in their own bed. Plus mommy needs her rest because she works. It also helps that she gets to watch cartoons in her rooom. I put her to bed at 7:45/8 and TV is off at 8:30. I kiss her and hug her goodnight but she is not allowed to get out of bed. I leave her door ajar so she can have a little bit of light from the hallway.

Well, good luck, not much advice but it worked for me.

Hi B.,

I know it's hard but if you want Alina to sleep in her own bed you just have to keep putting her back in bed until she falls asleep, over and over again. That means leaving the room when you put her in bed too. My little girl went through a phase like this and she would always say "I want to sleep in Mommy's room." Then the tears would roll. I just kept telling her that she is a big girl, that she had her bed and I have mine, and reassured her that everything is okay because I am right here in the next room. For the first few nights it's extremely hard and heartbreaking but then it's over, they get the hang of it...just like any other routine. Consistency is the key.

Hope this helps.

M.