Yes it is in fact scary. My mother caught colin cancer in time and it was all removed, however was considered a high risk and is going through chemo. We had ourselves convinced she would be a low risk and we would just be watched. The news of high risk was a real shock to us.
I find working and keeping busy my savior. If I sit still, I think I will curl in a ball and scream...it won't help. I have two sister capable of helping out with her treatment, however find myself by my mothers side every treatment. It is nearly a chore for me since they don't participate.
When emotions are running hot, I find myself like a mom away from her baby. I often feel comfort when I am with her and lose the anxious feeling.
I have to constantly remind myself that this is the medication which is the cure not the disease, however I somehow often find myself sad that she is going through this. I know there are other cases that are a lot worse, so I try to remind myself this is not such a bad thing.
I work the Susan G Komen race for a cure and find there is a lot of energy there. You will see tears of sorrow and joy. Perhaps you can contact them and find out if you can volunteer. I find it very uplifting. It is not the same as my mothers cancer, but it reminds me there are others who suffer and hurt as well as others who have survived.
Hugs to you R..