Why Am I Feeling Guilty?

I disagree with everyone. You should feel guilty because you should have never gotten her in the first place. Now the dog has to suffer because you didn't think things through.

I agree with Jenny and NOT the others. Why did you adopted a dog when you knew you were allergic?

This is why dogs end up in Shelters in the first place. You are feeling guilty because you were wrong!

I guess I don't get the dilema. If a dog makes you sick from known allergies. You need to get another pet.

You may not have to get rid of her...go to your local health food store and ask for Bee Pollen. It is small and crunchy. Some people like to put it on toast because they like the taste. I do not like the taste so I put it in juice, swirl it around and drink up. It is known to help allergies to animals and enviromental allergies. It has helped me and my daughter swears by it. I do know of one person that said she did not have to get rid of her cat after taking it. It is full of great vitamins. Let me know how it works for you.

T., Of course you feel guilty! A dog is a family member!
Have you considered you may have summer allergies and it isn't just the dog? Your allergies can change anytime!I say get tested again, keep the dog OUT of your bed room, get a hepafilter for your room. If you still have troubles and want a dog, consider a Cockapoo, they are Non shedding, Fantastic with kids! I am allergic to dogs also, and have 3! And I breed them. I keep mine short in the summer, for their sake! Good luck Honey. K.

Do you see an allergist? My DH is allergic to our dogs and cats but i take them to the groomers and got them specially bathed every couple months and he has allergy shots 2 times a month. If things are that bad you should definately be seeing an allergist on a regular basis. DH also has Asthma.

Also it may not be the dog as due to the huge amount of rain we had and now the dry there are lots of extra environmental allergies this year that have not occurred before. Which might be the reason things are worse.

I am sorry your allergies are so bad right now ( and i am sure I am going to get lambasted and be unpopular) but a 8 year old dog is SUPER difficult if not impossible to place. i sat on a dog rescue board and have participated in dog rescue since 1994.

If you can't find anyone what will you do. I beg you to not take her to the pound as in most cases a 9 yr old dog it is basically a death sentence. Dogs that are 9 do not adjust well to sleeping on concrete in the pound so the gimp more, look depressed and do not capture the attention of prospective owners in a positive way.
I am sorry to not be able to ease your guilt but 9 is an older dog and she might not have that much time left ( maybe 3 years) It is hard for older ones to adjust.
Sorry

Have you talked to your vet to see if there is anything that can help you?
My husband and I are allergic to cats. But we have two. The vet gave us a med that we added 2 drops in their water dish. We used it for about a month and now we are much better.
Or maybe see an ENT (Ears, Nose & Throat) doctor to help you with your allergies.
Good luck.

i am a store manager for a Pet Supplies "Plus"

have you ever tried a product called 'Allerpet D'? I don't carry it anymore(your vet may have it, and all our stores can special order it) but simple solution has a similar product, and all our stores should carry it.

you sprinkle it on a damp washcloth and rub it all over your animal. then brush it in. i use the one for cats (my son and I are allergic to our 3) and it works great. I apply it to them every 2-3 days.

hope this helps...
R.

Have you thought about going to an allergist? If they are that bad, OTC medicine obviously isn't working and you need to see someone for some tests. You might have to have shots, but that will help in the long run. You can buy allergen reducing shampoo for dogs at Pet Smart, and you can wipe her down with a cloth everyday. I think you and the kids will be heartbroken and regret your decision if you give her away.

T.:

What kind of dog do you have? If she is good with kids and other dogs we may be interested. I have 2 girls 5 & 2. We have a med size female dog that is 5 and a 2 yr old male cat. We have been thinking about another dog so ours has a buddy.

Let me know about your dog.

M.

You feel guilty because you know you should have never gotten her in the first place. Nevertheless, you shouldn't jepordize your health. Just try to find a home for her or place her in a no-kill shelter.

She was your first baby; of course you feel bad giving her up! But it's time to let her be a blessing to another family. You're doing the right thing.

Dear T. R.,

You should not feel guilty. Just talk to your beloved dog out loud and tell her that you don't want to do it, but you have to get her a new home due to your health. She might not understand exactly the words you are saying, but I think she will understand somehow just what you are trying to say to her. Dogs seem to understand an awful lot of what we say somehow. God put them on the earth to be our companions and love us back unconditionally.

I believe that if you pray you will find just the right home for her. I would go to the people's home a couple of times before you leave her there permanently so you feel comfortable about leaving her there. That's what the people did who sold us our Yorkie and she has been happy here most of the time. Except when our ADHD granddaughter bugs her. Our granddaughter has lived with us all but 8 months of the time we have had our Yorkie. Our little doggie seemed to miss our granddaughter even though she is mean to her (while she lived with her mom for those 8 months).

Your doggie will be O.K. in a new home. You just have to pray and ask God to help you accept that you did all you possibly could and just can't take the strain of being worn out from all the extra work and being sick any more.

L. C.

Why? Because you've invested a lot of love and affection already in the dog. And you sincerely want to provide the home. And it's difficult. My niece needed to find a home for one of her dogs, and auntie Carolynn here, the dog auntie and breeder had room. Always a soft touch. So we've had the dog for years. First mixed breed, and niece hasn't once come by for a visit to see her 'sweet Yukie".

The guilt is because after housing a pound puppy, you now have to 'shuffle' it along to elsewhere and it always seems unfair to "kick the dog out" after so many years of loving it. The dog doesn't always understand what it did wrong.
I would ask at Health food stores if there's anything that could possibly help the situation in the dog's favor and yours too. Is it dander that's bothering you? Do you have a good histamine blocker? Would Claritin or Zyrtec help?

Good luck; you have my sympathies.

Because you care. Worry if you don't feel a little guilty. But remember it is beyond your control.

T.,
I believe that you need to do what's best for your health and for your family's happiness. I recognize that your dog is a part of your family, but we all know she is not more important than you, your husband, or your children. It's a tough decision, but it has to be made. There will be guilt now and after, but as long as you are assured she has gone to a good home with loving people you will be able to have peace with your decision. Good luck!

K. :)

T.,

I am very sorry to have read about your situation with your dog. What you must be going through has got to be tough and very painful. Have you thought about doing some research on the internet for animal and adoption shelters who DO NOT euthanize animals. They work very h*** o* finding loving homes for pets. I have a friend who works in a place such as that. I will ask her at church today, and get some names and numbers of places you may want to try. Hang in there for now.

P. M

Hi T.,

Sorry to hear about your ordeal, but you are the one that is going to be taking care of the kids; not the dog. If the dog is giving you so many health problems, then it is probably a good idea to sell her or give her to someone else. You should not feel guilty at all for giving her up. Your family needs you and if you are not feeling good, they are not going to get the attention that they will need. It is sad to give up an animal, but you will get better about it. Think about your health first!

T. - I understand the delema. Send me the details on the dog. Typically we adopt big dogs. We have rescued our last 4 and there is nothing nicer than an already loved family pet that that is fully potty trained and likes kids. We took one that had been with a family for 12 years and they after having 3 children could not keep the dog any longer you are not alone. We have a story from each of them.

There are allergy pills and sprays that can help with this. Ask your vet also and he may have products you can use on her. Note- I have 2 cats, 2 dogs and BAD allergies!!!

I'm sorry. You're feeling guilty because you're feeling like you're stuck between a rock and a hard place. You love your dog, that's so obvious. But this dog you've come to love is affecting your health and happiness. You might want to check with your doctor to see if you could have some type of allergy shots to lessen your reactions. Also, some people find it helpful to have the dog bathed every week at a groomer, to eliminate more fur/dander, which can help ease your reactions. But that could get costly. I hope it all works out well for everyone. S.

Okay. first off, you feel guilty simple because you love this animal and it IS a shame to get rid of her. Second... I am HUGELY allergic to animals of most sorts. These rub ons that others are talking about do NOT work. They work for all of a day. The rubs control the dander ON the animal, not all the dander in your carpeting, mattresses, clothes. I am a severe asthmatic and have had my share of trying to find what works in order to spare our animals. NOTHING is worth your health. nothing! The dog will find a nice home, don't worry. And your health will be better. You'll have to give it some time after the dog is gone for your allergies to settle. Your carpets AND mattresses should be professionally cleaned. If you can't afford both then encase your mattress in a hypoallergenic casing. FREEZE any pillows that you have for 24 hrs. I know that's weird. But freezing kills dust mites and dander mites. So freeze them then for bed pillows buy hypoallergenic cases. Until your carpets can be professionally cleaned, minamize the vacuuming you do to 3-4 times a week (unless you have a huge vac like a kirby or rainbow) because vacuuming can actually release MORE dander and cause your allergies to be worse. Good Luck.... and remember that your health is what is important.

Because you are human!!!! Doing the best things doesn't always feel good.
M.

Hi T.,

Don't feel guilty for doing the best thing for your own health! As long as you are healthy, you can care for your family. I wouldn't compromise my own health (or my family's health) for an animal. If all the cleaning and washing is tiring you out and you are constantly exhausted because of it and fighting with your husband, it's totally not worth it to keep the animal.

Before I met my husband, he used an inhaler because his ex-wife insisted on having a dog and cat in the house for the kids even though he (and both kids) were allergic. She put the kids through painful allergy shots weekly. As soon as the dog and cat were moved to her new house, he had everything in his house steam-cleaned and he never had to use his inhaler again. I couldn't believe she would put having a pet over her husband's health.

I don't hate animals - I grew up with horses, dogs, and cats (outside) at my grandparents house. Personally, I think animals should be outside.

How could you take care of your kids with your eyes swelled shut for 2 days????? You need to do the best thing for your own health, for your husband, your kids, and your marriage. Don't feel guilty for finding a new home for your pet.

Good luck.
C.

i don't understand why you got her if you knew you were allergic. You sucked it up because you wanted to help the dog ('dog' centered concern) or because you had a desire to rescue the dog ('you' centered concern)? I don't think you should feel shameful or guilty for having to get rid of the dog, but consider this an opportunity to evaluate if you were really helping the dog or yourself when you decided to adopt. Don't attach any feelings to it, don't judge yourself, just accept it for what it is and move on. You will find a nice, loving home for the dog. Get the book, Loving What Is by Byron Katie. Do 'The Work' and you will find some peace in understanding yourself better and be able to move beyond the guilt.
http://www.thework.com/thework.asp

Think about acupuncture for your allergies. There is an amazing Dr. in Grass Lake who may be able to help. He has helped people reduce their allergies from life threatening to just a little sniffle. He's amazing, and acupuncture can work for many types of allergies. His Name is Mark Leventer, M.D. http://www.grasslakemedicalcenter.com/staff_mark.html

You are feeling guilty because, despite the fact that she is compromising your lifestyle, you still love her and you really want to keep her. Keep in mind that the problem with allergies is that they can continue to get worse if you continue to be exposed to the allergen. We were told this just recently when our oldest daughter was having an allergic reaction to something unknown (we thought it was grass). It may help to keep in mind that if the dog stays your reaction could continue to get worse - maybe until it threatens your life completely. You need to be healthy in order to be a good mom. But then, you know that. However, it still doesn't help the guilt. Once you find a good home for her, you'll start to feel better. I remember a time where we got a puppy from a friend of a co-worker. The puppy didn't work out with our other dogs, so had to decide what to do. We set up a time frame to find another home, or she would have to go to the Animal Shelter. We felt bad about the decision, but she wasn't happy. When we found a good home (and we were able to check on her a couple times), we felt a lot better about the decision. I'm sure you will as well. Maybe you'll find a home where you, or your family, can see her once in a while.

Hopefully it's because you have a conscience. More people need one! Now, find your doggy a really good home and know in the future that you just can't handle pets because of your alergies. Good luck. C.

You are feeling guilty because you love your dog!! I can relate. Go to www.ahccenter.com
This is an alternative healthcare group that has incredible results, especially with allergies....even CLEARING them. No shots, no painful tests...good natural healing! Read the success stories. They are in Grosse Pointe...well worth the trip!!

Hi T.,

I know exactly what you are going through. I got a cat in 1999 and had her for six years until I developed allergies to her. I tried everything to keep her, but nothing worked. Never had allergies for the first six years, but then for several months I found out I could no longer keep her because my allergies were gradually getting worse. I ended up placing an ad to give her to a home and found a nice cat lady to take her. It still hurts until this day, but I didn't have a choice. I remember going to petfinder.com and placing ads and there are alot of rescue groups you can find there that may help you find a new home for your beloved pet.

Good Luck,

MC

Hi T.---I'm sad for you that you feel you have to give up your beloved pet. There might be an alternative, although it would take time. Your allergies are a result of your immune system being overly sensitive to environmental stimulus. There is a way to balance your immune system and not by drugs.

Would you be interested in a way to balance your immune system by only using food? There is a way to reduce your sensitivities, if not eliminate them. What is your diet like?
We need to eat a minumum of 9 to 13 servings of fruits and veggies each day for optimal health. Then, there are foods that compromise the immune system. I have my own business as a wellness educator and I have a bachelors degree in home economics. As part of my business, I work with a wonderful product called Juice Plus+. It is 17 fruits, vegetables and grains in capsule, gummy and chewable form. There are 13 published idependent studies, several of which show that JP+ balances the immune system. It may not cure your allergies, but I do know that at the very least they will improve, and that means you may not have to give up your beloved pet. I would love to tell you more about this if you are interested, so feel free to contact me at any time. The information I have to share is free of charge. It is that important. The research shows that it will make a difference in your health.

Hope to talk to you sson. In health, D. ###-###-####

You love your dog! Don't worry. She'll find a great home!!!