I didn't really know where to put this question...but here looks good to me...
Our master bedroom is set up with an open floor plan between the bathroom and bedroom. Our 37.5 mo old daughter comes in in the morning about the time my husband gets up to shower. He is starting to feel like it is the time to stop being naked in front of her. He has started taking his underwear to the bathroom with him and making sure he is out of sight when drying off, but sometimes she just walks in and catches him off guard.
I'm curious to know what conversations you have had with your kids and at what ages. How do your husbands feel? This actually bothers him more than me, understandably.
Hi everyone,
Thank you so much for all the advice! In our home, my husband was raised very conservative and I am an only child and did not have a father around till I was about 7, so our feelings and views are a bit different. Neither one of us have body image issues and probably because we have two girls, or maybe because I am the mom, I don’t worry about nudity at all. Neither one of them really pays attention when I am naked or my husband is half naked. My three year old asked me once if that was my kitty…I told her yes.
I am hoping to give my husband the advice given below about not making a big deal about it if he gets “caught” and maybe some key words he can use so that he is not uncomfortable and ways to divert her attention onto something else. So far he has been handling it very well!
Thanx again!! ~J.
If Dad is uncomfortable with the situation it is time for clothes. Keeping a pair of underwear in the drawer on his side of the bed eliminates the need for the dash to the bath. The same goes for Mom if there are boys. Both parents can present the proper attire for public (family)togetherness.
In a family being naked is only a big deal when you make it a big deal. I grew up in a family were it wasn't a big deal. My dad would walk around in his tighty whities all the time even throughout high school and it never bothered me. (he would put clothes on when my friends came over thankfully!) Now in my mid-twenties I still have no problems getting undressed and trying on clothes with my mom. And I've never had any "body issues" like hard core dieting or eating disorders. I believe it's because I was raised to know that everybody had a different body shape and size and that our bodies are not shameful!
Having said all of that I realize that not all people feel the same way. So it's really up to you and your husband. If he feels uncomfortable then he should at least continue to bring his clean boxers to the bathroom with him so after the shower he has something to cover up with. If your daughter walks in on him and doesn't seem to mind seeing daddy naked then she's telling you that she doesn't care! At some point she probably will start to be embarrassed when she sees him naked, at which point she'll learn to stop walking in on his shower. I hope this helps a little. Have a great day!
I think covering up is overrated. As a society we have become extremely self conscious - to the point of death (teenagers and adults being bulimic and anorexic over needing to look a certain way). If we were to grow up in an environment of being comfortable no matter how we are dressed (or not dressed) this obsession with looks wouldn't be as big of a deal as it is now.
My son is 7, my daughter is almost 5. My husband and I both go naked and the kids get to learn about body parts without embarrassment. And, my kids feel they can be naked without judgment as well. They still don't know what judgment means at this age which I am sooooo grateful for!
So strip it off! And the XXX sites won't even be an issue when they get older! (Don't quote me on that - just havin some fun!)
But if you or your husband is uncomfortable being nude around your children, may I just suggest that you don't make a big deal about covering up, otherwise your children WILL think it's a big deal. Everyone's body is so beautiful in it's own way, it's our temple, be proud of it!
I agree that you shouldn't make a big deal out of covering up. You don't want to teach your kids to be ashamed of their bodies. My two and a half year old will sometimes go to the bathroom with either me or my husband just for the company. She is curious and asks "what is that" and points. Our bathroom door is always unlocked so she often sees us get out of the shower. The other day she had pulled her stool over to the toilet bowl and stood on it facing the toilet. She had pulled her pants down (She is potty trained) put her fingers to her pee-pee and wanted to pee that way like daddy. We had a good laugh over that one.
Anyway, whatever you are comfortable with. Everyone has to be happy. If you are worried about what she might say at preschool, I know that is my husbands biggest concern, I am sure they have heard it all!
S.
J.,
My husband probably stopped being naked around the kids when my oldest (9) was about 4 or so. The funny thing is that he is still a little shy about being naked around me =)
I, on the other hand feel very comfortable taking baths with them (girl 9 boy 7). But, let me also state that at one time my son would make unappropriate comments and I taught him to respect others and that our bodies are not something to make fun of.
My husband thinks I'm weird and should not be naked in front of him, but they've grown up that way and feel it's normal. Now when they grow up, I hope they make a wise choice with their kids.
Good luck =)
You know I've never seen my parents naked and to tell you the truth I don't ever want to see them naked. I do believe that you body is YOUR temple. You and your spouse should enjoy eachothers temples heee :). I also agree that when your husband starts covering up not to make a big deal about it just take whats needed to the shower and at least put his boxers on when he gets out!
good luck
honestly i think it's a big deal when someone is uncomfortable.
In our house I have an almost 4 year old who could be a nudist.
half the time if she hears me or her father showering she strips yells "nakey baby" and jumps in :)
doesn't bother us.. my husband is European and nudity is much more the norm there..
personally I just don't care.
When he's got a big pot belly. Ha ha!!
Jokes aside, this is really up to you and your husband. If he's not comfortable then that's the end of the story. In my opinion and my husband's nudity is not a big deal at all, and your daughter is extremely young and probably wouldn't think twice about it. My husband was still taking showers occasionally with our daughter at that age. My now 15 year old daughter still sees me naked (and cringes), and with my sons at around 10 or so if I was emerging from the shower and they were around I'd say, "I'm naked so unless you want to be scarred for life you'd better go away," and that got them the heck out of there. I still say that actually, and my youngest is 14.
But it's your husband's body, so he gets to decide who to show it to.
p.s. - I really agree with Gail, above.
Hi J.,
My daughters do the same thing to my husband, and he is uncomfortable as well. He just makes sure he's covered up as often as possible. (My older daughter started coming into our room pretty early on, if I remember correctly at age two, but once she started asking (at age 3) "How come daddy doesn't sit down when he goes to the bathroom?" and a few other questions, my husband just made sure he kept himself covered up. Each child is different, and each daddy needs to do what is most comfortable for him, but for our family, my husband chose to remain covered up when my eldest daughter was 3.
As far as conversations are concerned regarding differences between girls and boys, we really haven't had that "conversation" yet. I just try to answer her questions when she has them.
Well I remember my mother told me that my dad stopped being naked in front of me when I was three. The thing that made them realize it was time was when I asked him "Daddy is that your tail?" I think that story is hilarious. But I guess I would do the same.
