When Did Your Child/ren Wipe on Their Own?

Updated on January 20, 2011
C.W. asks from Chicago, IL
18 answers

Hi mamasource moms/dads. I have a 6.5 y/o son who won't wipe. On occasion he will ask for help, but most often he just won't wipe. I taught him and have been asking him to wipe since he was 5.5 y/o. How old were your child/ren when they wiped on their own? Thanks for your advice!

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P.M.

answers from Tampa on

My 5 y/o will wipe herself, but I ask that she ask me for help with BMs. I notice it's not easy for her to get all the poop if she has a more wet poop rather than very formed. TMI? Sorry LOL

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A.C.

answers from Houston on

My daughter will be 4 in March and has been wiping herself for nearly a year. It took some time and patience, but I rarely have to help or see evidence of poor wiping.

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D.P.

answers from Pittsburgh on

My son had an "Independence Day" when he turned 5..he was killing me! :)
Kids "can" wipe at 3-4 but probably need a check & re-wiping.

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M.R.

answers from Rochester on

My 4 year old wipes himself but sometimes I check, especially if I notice extra streaks in his underwear or if he is having loose BMs. He likes his independence and I am encouraging it. If he were in a preschool, I don't think they would be wiping for him anyway, but he is home with one of us all the time. We do keep the moist wipes in the bathroom (regular family ones) and I encourage him to use those since it helps him get himself a bit cleaner. Your son is probably old enough, it is probably more of a stubbornness or an "I don't need to" issue. My 4 year old still doesn't understand that if he flushes after he washes his hands he has to wash his hands again. :)

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J.C.

answers from Columbus on

All of my kids wiped on their own (not always well!) by the time they were 4...I am just always sure to remind them "don't forget to wipe WELL" when I see them headed to the restroom.

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H.W.

answers from Portland on

Four is my cutoff, for both my son and my preschool kids. As a nanny, I just decided that four was as good an age as any for them to learn. They have the manual dexterity and fine motor skills. If they need help after wiping a few times, I'll give them some support, otherwise, they're given a lot of faith that "I just know you can do it! I'll see you when you've washed your hands!" and I walk away. Racing stripes... they just happen. That's what Spray-n-Wash is for!

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K.M.

answers from Laredo on

My DS started wiping himself when I found out I was pregnant with our second. So he was a little over 3.5 years old. We wanted to make sure he could get the hang of it before our DD came and now he does really well.

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D.K.

answers from Pittsburgh on

DS started wiping when he was potty trained (25 months) but it was more a swipe in the general direction than for real wiping. He began wiping effectively without checking needed at preschool at 3-1/2 and at home at 4-1/2. What does he do at school - kindergarten teachers don't wipe (others) as far as I know.

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N.P.

answers from Chicago on

all the kids at my daycare are wiping independently without help within 2 months of learning to use the potty

make it a non negotiable - he gets in trouble if he doesn't - you'll have to check for a while, or go via underwear checks

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S.X.

answers from Chicago on

when my son turned 5 he decided it was time that i no longer "check". But he started wiping when we started potty training. (and they don't wipe in school/daycare). If he has diaherria (sp?) he won't. otherwise 5th birthday. Maybe you could do a reward system for wiping?

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B.M.

answers from Chicago on

When my children were younger, I bought wet toliet paper. They liked using that because they had trouble with toilet paper sticking to their butts. After that, I didn't have a problem.

A.N.

answers from Bloomington on

Hopefully soon! LOL! I am constantly having to send my 8 year old & my 6.5 year old back to the bathroom to wipe. They say they "forget."

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M.P.

answers from Portland on

My grandson is 7.5 and still rarely wipes on his own. My granddaughter has wiped on her own since she was 8 or so but at 10 she still doesn't some of the time.

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C.H.

answers from Chicago on

If it's sloppy, I will wipe for my 6 year old son, but 99% of the time, he will wipe on his own. I started teaching him at 5 and like your son, he wasn't interested until I said he had no choice. I told him he had to learn so that if he had to go in school, he would be able to do it all on his own.

My daughter is 4 and and wipes 1/4 of the time.

Good luck.

Do you have flushable wipes for him. If you show him how to hold the paper and be there when he does it, he'll get it. Just tell him how proud you are of him.

M.B.

answers from Chicago on

I have twin boy/girl's her are 7. My daughter never needs the help when she has a bm, but my son seems to need the help. He'll do it himself, but then ask me to check to make sure he is ok (not all the time though). He normally has the huge gigantic poops unlike my daughter. It's amazing what comes out of that little guy!! LOL :)

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A.G.

answers from Norfolk on

My 3.75 year old boy/girl twins wipe on their own. Not always perfectly, and I very often have to remind them but I don't do it for them or usually go into the bathroom with them unless it was obviously done poorly. I find that the toilet safe wet wipes really help but we are on city water so we don't have to worry about septic. Now if they have diarrhea or something going on I am always there to help, but really with 3 kids I am in the bathroom with them less than half the time. When I am with them I make sure that they are doing everything they are supposed to do and if I know they are pooping I pop in to make sure. Maybe I am mean, but if they try to skip wiping all together I make them do it and I remind them that their baby brother still needs me to wipe his bum, but they need to be responsible for doing it themselves.

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K.C.

answers from Wichita on

My youngest started when he was 4 y/o. I just keep flushable wipes for my family & remind my youngest to wipe if he has a BM or his bottom may start hurting.

God bless!

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C.F.

answers from Chicago on

My boys always wiped on their own but not very good. I would show them over and over but until they had to start doing their own laundry. Not until they had to scrub the poo out of their underwear did they begin to wipe better.
When they were your sons age I would fuss and show them the underwear but nothing worked until they had to clean them themself. I had to watch because they would have just thrown them away instead of washing them.

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