When Baby Is a Surprise Gender....

Updated on June 23, 2011
R.W. asks from Salt Lake City, UT
26 answers

So we have a boy and a girl, so for this #3 baby, we aren't finding out. It has been SO much fun, and we are really excited for the extra anticipation in the delivery room. But last week when I went through and organized all of my newborn clothes I have saved, there are quite a few "holes" in each wardrobe. If it's a boy, I need more sleepers, socks and pants. If it's a girl, I need onesies and socks. It's not a ton, but just a few things. So I'm just wondering what you moms recommend...should I go ahead NOW and just buy what I need and plan to return what I don't need? Or should I wait and try to get to the store after the baby arrives? It's kind of a dumb question, but I'm just curious as to what YOU have done and what worked easier all around?

PS...I am 34 weeks now, so it's coming up!!! :)

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answers from Lynchburg on

Hi mommy-

My first child was 'supposed' to be a girl...On every ultra sound they said so...and I believed. I had an entire wardrobe for a girl...NOT a neutral item to be had...lol

I sent my mom shopping for my son...lol While I recovered from the emergency c section...and the SHOCK that 'he' was not a 'she'!

Best Luck!

2 moms found this helpful


answers from Lancaster on

We have always waited to find out baby's gender after the birth. We ended up with three boys and three girls (and one I don't know what?? due in January). I've never dressed my babies in baby blue and pastel pink. Green, yellow, cream, white. Red, orange.

I would buy neutral colors and be set for either gender.

Then again, you are talking to a Mom who also dressed her little boys in the same white dresses as her little girls (and, yes, two of the boys DID come first), because it's just easier. Hey, the Victorians did it! :)

1 mom found this helpful


answers from Milwaukee on

For the first few weeks my babies only wore white onsies from Carter's inside a swaddle blanket. You can get either short sleeves or long sleeves from BabiesRUs. I would get a bunch of those and then you should have some time to either shop online or make a trip to the store to fill in the rest.

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answers from Austin on

I started with 3 girls (never knew the gender, either...), and when the boy came around, he still wore the pink sleepers and such at night... heck, I had them, and I didn't really care what color they were!

Around home, it doesn't really matter if a boy is wearing a "flowery" onsie... it isn't that big of a deal. Save the "boy" outfits for when you take him out, or if someone is coming to visit.

Just use what you have on hand, because I'm sure you will get plenty of gifts after the baby is born.

As others have said, if you need to fill in a few gaps, make them gender neutral.

4 moms found this helpful


answers from Atlanta on

Either way you have to go to the store - either to buy or to return. I think buying is less hassle, so I would wait.

3 moms found this helpful


answers from Boston on

if you just have to fill in the gaps for each gender be neutral....white socks....yellow sleepers? i mean seriously how long is baby going to be in new born sizes anyway? like a week or two right lol....

i would fill in neutral and wait for baby to grow to fill in the other sizes once you know babies gender....

3 moms found this helpful


answers from Johnson City on

I would buy non-gender specific basic items, like white onesies and white socks, just enough to get you through until you are up to going shopping after the baby arrives. Plus, I'm betting you will get a ton of clothes once the baby is born cuz everyone will think you need something gender specific since you didn't know beforehand.

GL and congrats!!!!

2 moms found this helpful


answers from Killeen on

We did the same thing with our third. Since we had most of the essentials from the other babies( we had clothes to bring him home in) we just went shopping after the birth. It was fun we could pick out things that fit his personality :).

2 moms found this helpful


answers from Spokane on

I would wait. I'm the type who will save the receipt, keep the tags on, and even bag the stuff I intend to take back, and then never do it. Three years later, there are the clothes in a bag and it's too late to return them.
You'll probably also have people bringing gifts over after baby is born who wanted to wait and find out what gender you had before they shopped. Then if you still have gaps in wardrobes, you can use any gift cards you received and shop your heart out!
Congrats and enjoy the surprize moment!

2 moms found this helpful


answers from Provo on

I haven't yet had a surprises (I will with the next one :D), but I have worked at baby stores and I would suggest to either go shopping for the items only one month (no sooner) than your due date. Some places have strict policies, while other stores are very lax because they know babies are unpredictable.
Or just wait. That is what I plan on doing. Just wait. That way you can have an excuse to get out of the house for a bit and see all the new adorable season appropriate clothes at clearance. If you go to Babies R US we got all of the clothes 4 months in advanced and usually go on clearance or deep sales around the time that people think about getting new coats or what not. For example we would get Halloween costumes in July and would put them out in August. By Oct 15th came around they were already on clearance.

1 mom found this helpful


answers from Los Angeles on

We did the same.. waited on our 3rd and already had a boy and girl at home. Our 3rd, a girl, ended up being way smaller then our other 2. The day after we got home from the hospital we all went to Target and got some clothes for her. It was no biggie to us. Tho I will admit I was scolded by several older ladies for having a newborn out.

Congrats on Baby!

1 mom found this helpful


answers from Dallas on

WAIT until you know what the sex is... why buy then have to return, well, I hate doing that, plus you may get some gifts for your newborn... I would just buy some white socks since you need them.

Congrats on #3!!!

1 mom found this helpful


answers from Seattle on

I would buy closer to your due date. Go some place that has a pretty long return policy...90 days or what ever. That way once you have baby and you know what will need to be returned & you are not rushed to get back to the store.

1 mom found this helpful


answers from New York on

Buy neutrals and save your receipts!

1 mom found this helpful


answers from Chicago on

I would wait, but then again I HATE returning things. I never seem to get around to it. I didn't know with any of my 4, we had some neutral to get started and then I got lots of gifts, then I shopped to fill in any leftover gaps. Not only do you not know the gender, you also don't know the size. You could buy newborn sizes and have a large baby that can't wear them anyway. Or you buy 0-3 and have a small baby that won't fit into them until they are out of season. The only thing I bought gender specific prior to each delivery was a "coming home/first picture" outfit, one of each. When my first was a boy I actually saved the girl outfit for #2 (did I mention I hate returning things?), I was so excited that #2 got to wear that girl outfit home! I think you have enough to get started, waiting is so fun!! Enjoy the rest of your pregnancy!

1 mom found this helpful


answers from Redding on

Go now before its born and get pink and blue stuff, a couple of each. Save the reciepts, And return what isnt right later. When friends come to visit to see the new baby, and they always ask if theres anything you need, you can ask them to return the set you dont need. Or send hubby or wait a couple weeks and then return when you are out and about. When I was expecting our 2nd and had no idea what we were having, I actually had 2 different wallpapers picked out. A few hours after she was born I called the store and gave them the number to order rolls with butter flies and flowers for me. it came in a few days later and I was up wallpapering by the next weekend. lol

1 mom found this helpful


answers from Jacksonville on

I would say either wait or get just a few items in neutral colors of the things you need. The socks and sleepers are easy. White socks, and if you pick out a super cute pink sleeper and have a boy, well who cares they will just be sleeping in it! LOL

1 mom found this helpful


answers from Fort Collins on

We did not find out the gender on either of our first two children. It is pretty easy to shop for gender neutral clothes and the benefit it that you have a more colorful wardrobe.

Just remember, if you are in doubt about a color it is easier to put a girl in blue with a bow, than to put a boy in pink.

Grats - we loved not knowing the gender ahead of time.



answers from Baton Rouge on

I didn't find out my daugter's sex ahead of time - just bought socks, t-shirts, onesies, etc in white, yellow, green, etc.



answers from Provo on

Buy gender neutral & let friends/family know what you need for each sex. No one will mind buying something small like a pack of onesies or socks on the way to see the new baby.



answers from Topeka on

I would use what I have now & go to the store later & have a fun filled day shopping for new baby :)


I would use what I have now & go to the store later & have a fun filled day shopping for new baby :)



answers from Denver on

I would say wait until baby comes. When I was pregnant with my second the ultrasound said "It's a girl". When baby came out there were extra parts....oops, the ultrasound was wrong and I had a baby boy with lots of girls clothes. I had kept all my receipts and was able to return/exchange everything. And really, it was no big deal to run to the store for the things I needed. If you buy all the stuff now then you'll have to return half of it--basically going to the store twice. Wait and just make the trip once.
Good luck!



answers from Salt Lake City on

We did the same thing for #3. It is fun! :)
We didn't buy much of anything before baby came. Maybe a gender-neutral outfit or two (especially something to take baby home in). But we had enough of both for the first few weeks (a onesie is a onesie, who cares the color) that we didn't bother buying much more until we had the baby and knew what we really needed.

Something to keep in mind: most people will go to get something they really want/need, but are much slower at returning things they don't - you could end up with a bunch of unneeded stuff that you never get around to returning if you buy in advance!



answers from Salt Lake City on

Either way you'd have to go to the store after the baby is born. I'd wait so instead of the stress and bore of returning clothes you can pick out cute things that you know your baby will be wearing. Something fun to do when you're running on snatches of sleep:) Have fun!



answers from Pittsburgh on

Buy neutrals - they come in way more than pastel yellow and mint green - you can find chocolate brown, orange, real green, red, black, white. If you might return, check a store's return policy first - a lot are now 14 days, not the 30-60 days they used to be. Congratulations.



answers from Denver on

white yellow green and lavender are very useful!

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