What Would You Do? - Rancho Cucamonga,CA

Updated on July 28, 2011
S.G. asks from Rancho Cucamonga, CA
27 answers

So, not really asking for advice (or criticism) - just wondering what you would do:

About 3 weeks ago, my son (15) was riding his bicycle and ran through a stop sign because he was following the lead of a car that had stopped and then gone. The car suddenly braked because a jogger was in the crosswalk. She's very lucky the car didn't hit her! My son swerved to avoid her and ended up laying the bike down. His back tire caught her calf and knocked her off her feet. She had the wind knocked out of her and of course a possible bruise. I really think she just wasn't paying attention. She said she never saw the car, my son's friend, or my son. Really?! A car had to slam it's brakes on to keep from hitting you and you didn't see any of these people coming at you?! And, the car? It swerved around all of this and just kept going!!!

911 was called by a witness. She declined an ambulance saying she was fine. My husband declined an ambulance and we took my son to urgent care. He had a lot of road rash and cut his head open requiring a lot of stitches. His head and most of the road rash has healed although his knee is still pretty nasty. It was an accident. We didn't really think much about it.

Yesterday the jogger called and says she wants us to pay her out-of-pocket costs for her medical bills after insurance! I was pretty surprised and taken aback. In all the years of injuries to myself and my kids, an accident is an accident and we just used our medical insurance and went on. It would never have dawned on me to ask someone else to pay my bills!

While I realize he is legally at fault, and I am sympathetic to her needs, I'm a little upset. We don't really have a lot of extra money laying around. I still haven't received his medical bill yet. And I just had my daughter at the ER on Saturday and I'm scared to know what that's gonna cost me. And now she wants me to pay her medical bills too?! It's all a bit much.

And the things that upsets me the most, is she's a mom too, and yet she never asked how my son was. She called a neighbor of mine to get my number and she never asked her how he was. And then she called me and never asked me how he was. I even said "I'm a little surprised that you'd call me 3 weeks after the fact for money. I thought you were called to ask how my son was." And she still didn't ask! Who does that?

It's been 3 weeks and she claims her foot is still swollen and she can't wear a shoe. At this point she has $1000+ in bills (really?) and her share is 20%. But what if she needs more xrays, a scan, surgery? Ohmygosh! How much will all that be?!

If you were in her place, would YOU ask me to pay your bills?

If you were me, would YOU pay her bills?

Just kinda wondering if this is the norm and I'm totally in the wrong?!

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So What Happened?

Just to clarify, I know:
1-She was in the crosswalk & had the right away.
2-He ran the stop sign & was in the wrong.
3-We must take responsibility for our actions.

She has every right to ask, I was just surprised because we've never asked anyone for money over an accident. So I just wondered if it was the norm. And I'm not trying to skip out on my responsibilities, I just don't have that kind of money and it scared me to think she could bankrupt us or we could lose our home.
I am a little suspicious. 3 weeks ago, we thought she had a (really bad) bruise on her calf and that was it. Last week, she claimed she needed x-rays of her head, chin & legs. This week, she claims she blacked out at the site, is now receiving therapy for her neck, has several broken toes, and deep tissue bruises. and oh, there was no police report, only paramedics responded.
As it turns out, the Personal Liability coverage of homeowner's insurance protects us from claims for injuries or damage caused in a bicycle accident. So, I have turned it over to them. It is out of my hands and I am at peace with that.
As it says in Jeremiah 6:16 (NIV): ...stand at the crossroads and look; ...ask where the good way is, and walk in it, and you will find rest for your souls."

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P.B.

answers from Spartanburg on

Could it be a scam she put together to get money out of naive people? The fact that she did not want to have an ambulance involved (no authorities) makes me wonder.

9 moms found this helpful

A.S.

answers from Detroit on

I would NOT be asking you to pay my medical bills if I were her.

She's looking for money. Ask her to see the bills. Also, talk to a lawyer for a free consult.

5 moms found this helpful

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J.F.

answers from Tallahassee on

I would not pay her medical bills. She declined the ambulance and said that she was fine. Who's to say that she didn't injure her foot afterwards doing something else?

15 moms found this helpful
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R.K.

answers from Appleton on

I wouldn't pay for anything without a court order and/or an attorney's advice. She can file a claim in small claims court and you can counter sue for your costs. I don't know the law but since your son is a minor and she is an adult and she wasn't watching where she was going the court may see it as her fault.

12 moms found this helpful

S.M.

answers from Kansas City on

I would tell her politely that she'll need to take you to small claims court because as far as you are concerned she caused your sons injuries by walking out in front of him and a car. Tell her if she does decide to take you to small claims court you will be filing a cross suit.

No, I don't think it sounds right what she is doing.

10 moms found this helpful

B.S.

answers from Lansing on

If I was her, no I would not ask, I would consider it an accident and move on. I also have great insurance that would cover most of my expense.

If I was you, I think I would contact a lawyer, as you are right this could get more costly. And I would be a little sketchy about what the true costs would be.

I do however, think that no matter how the accident happened your son was at fault being that he is responsible for watching where he was going. So, that being said, if she really did truly rack up a bill (and has lousy insurance) then yeah, she might need help paying it, so that is understandable.

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S.B.

answers from Houston on

No I wouldn't ask for money. Do NOT pay her a dime. I would also not admit anything to her either. She could be taping the conversation. If she waited three weeks how do you know it was related to this incident? I'm surprised the police weren't called since an ambulance was called. I would just tell her that you are not going to pay for her medical bills as you do not believe you are responsibile for them. If she wants to pursure this further she will. During the meantime, it wouldn't hurt to talk to an attorney.

7 moms found this helpful

C.O.

answers from Washington DC on

I'm truly sorry that your son got hurt by an ignorant jogger...URGH!!!

No, if I was in HER place..I wouldn't have refused medical care...but I wouldn't be suing either...I would turn it over to my insurance company and let them handle it...

I would tell her NOT to call me anymore...get her information then call your insurance company...DO NOT PAY HER ANYTHING!!!! once you start paying - it will NEVER stop...let your insurance company handle it...

BEST OF LUCK!!! I hope that your insurance says to her - too bad so sad - you refused medical care at the incident site...I know that's cold but man oh man....

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A.G.

answers from Albuquerque on

You need an Attorney now. Dont pay her a cent and dont talk to her again. I get that she was injured but she shouldnt have refused treatment on the scene. It sounds like shes just out for cash. I wouldnt pay anything. Hope your son is allright

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J.B.

answers from Boston on

NO I would never do such a thing if I were in her shoes.

DO NOT pay her anything. Make her hire an attorney and sue your son. Good luck getting anything out of a 15 year old. Honestly unless you have pre-paid legal or some service where you can consult with an attorney for free I wouldn't even waste any time or money with an attorney for yourself until you get served or mailed something from an attorney for her.

Sounds like she doesn't have health insurance - too bad for her. Accidents happen.

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B.M.

answers from Chicago on

Hi,

I hope your son is ok. This is a very unfortunate incident. Just remember that had the police been called he would have also recieved a ticket for running a stop sign.

I live in Chicago. And there is a joke in our city:
What is the only thing a pedestrian and a motorist have in common? They both hate the cyclists.

The cyclists here don't follow the rules of the road. Sometimes it is so bad with them swerving through intersections and ignoring stop signs and lights and just going through intersections regardless of whose turn it is.... It doesn't matter if the car was pulling through after stopping. The stop sign is there so that it limits the speed of the motorist / cyclist. Your son didn't stop. Therefore, he was wasn't going slow and didn't have time to stop his bike without hitting her. As a pedestrian SHE has the right of way - even though she was probably jogging and listening to her ipod or whatever.

She was not smart to decline medical care, though.

Let's assume she's on the up and up. If her foot is really so swollen that she can't wear a shoe then it's probably spraigned or whatever. So, she would have been sent for x-rays and absolutely her bills are over $1,000. I fell down my stairs and injured my wrist. I went to my primary care Dr, had one xray and was referred to a specialist with a hairline fracture. That alone added up to about $2,000. Had my accident been caused by your son and I didn't have enough money to pay I absolutely would ask you to pay for my medical bills. That's actually how it works. YOU injure someone - you pay their medical bills. Yes, this was an accident - that just means your son did not INTEND to hit her. But your son was still at fault. Why should she be out money because your son didn't stop at a stop sign and hit her? But I would have been checked out at the time of the accident.

I certainly would not pay her at this point - just because you don't know where it will end. This will have to be handled legally and I would tell her that is for the benefit of EVERYONE involved. Typically with car accidents the settlement isn't until treatment is signed off by a physician that it's the END of the treatment for that injury. Then you settle.

I would tell her that she declined medical care at the time of the accident and you have no way of knowing her injuries weren't sustained in some other manner. Then let her hire an attorney.

Good luck.

6 moms found this helpful

T.L.

answers from St. Louis on

Agreed and accident is an accident. People today don't pay attention to what's going on around them. Had she looked both ways before going into the road this wouldn't have happened and no one got hurt. BUT I bet it was an accident she didn't look both ways.

Personally I would never call someone to pay for my medical bills when I really caused the accident.

I see you live in Calf. This is a far fetch, but on the TV show Judge Judy you could take her to pay for your son's medical bills and let her counter-sue. If you win the show pays the judgments not the individual. Just a thought.

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S.H.

answers from Honolulu on

Get an Attorney.
If you want to fight it.

A Police should have been called.
Thus, a police report would have been filed... per a pedestrian/bicycle accident etc.
And per this report, it would be documentation for you... and PROOF that she rejected an Ambulance saying she was "fine."

But you did say, that you know, that your son's bike... 'caught her calf' and knocked her down....
Now, SHE has to prove that her injuries and treatment, ARE due to this accident.
Where is the proof?
AND PHOTOS OF HER injury????
She said, her foot, is swollen etc.

Now, PEDESTRIANS... DO have the right of way... AND she WAS in a Cross-walk. (so SHE was, legally doing the proper thing. She was IN a cross-walk. The driver of the car, was negligent and did not see her and then had to swerve to avoid hitting her).
AND... your Son.... did ride through a Stop Sign.
Pedestrians, in a Cross-Walk... DO have the right of way.

AND.... you said a "Witness" called 911.
SO.... did ANYONE get the name/contact info of this "Witness???" That person, can verify, the accident...

You can always tell her, you do NOT have the money to pay her.
And you get an Attorney.
She has to PROVE, her 'case' too.
And that, her injuries, after the fact, WAS indeed, due to the accident and your son's bike, catching her calf.

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C.W.

answers from Santa Barbara on

Cars and bikers are not suppose to be in a crosswalk where there is a jogger. The jogger has the right of way. Would have been great to get a police report. I have a feeling you are going to pay, we are responsible for our minor children. She's only asking what's not covered by her insurance.

*** I am schocked at the number of mothers who wouldn't do the right thing!! Her son hit her in a CROSSWALK. There is nothing wrong with not being transported by ambulance. I was in a four car pileup two years ago and I wanted to go home and have my daughter drive me. I was injured sure, but not losing blood that I was going to go into shock.

You would all feel different if it were your child hut in a crosswalk. Very sad

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K.P.

answers from New York on

If I were in her place (which I really don't know what her place is), I would not ask you to pay my out-of-pocket bills.

I would strongly encourage you to contact an attorney about this one. I'm not sure why, but I have a really strange feeling about this one!

5 moms found this helpful

C.T.

answers from Santa Fe on

Her insurance company should be contacting your insurance company. She should not be calling you and telling you to pay her bills. I'm sorry this happened to your son. It really sucks there are people out there like this. On the other hand there is the chance she really is seriously injured and will have problems for life. But from what I have noticed is there is a certain type of person who does this kind of thing over and over...they are the same kind of person who is always suing other people. I hope it all gets taken care of fast....through your insurance companies.

5 moms found this helpful

V.W.

answers from Jacksonville on

Regardless of whether your son was following a car's "lead" as you put it, he failed to obey traffic laws by not stopping at the stop sign. They are for cars and bikes. And pedestrians ALWAYS have the right of way.
That said (meaning, your son is in the wrong regarding the accident), you have no way to know that her injuries were sustained in that particular incident. She was hit in the calf (not the foot/ankle?) and she walked away with no problems after refusing medical care? Not likely if she was injured significantly enough that it is supposedly still swollen 3 weeks later. My husband stepped in a hole while looking for a golf ball, strained his foot (not even a full on sprain) and barely could walk afterwards. A few weeks wearing a brace, after xrays, etc... and he is fine now.. but it wasn't swollen for 3 weeks. Heck, it wasn't even swollen after a week. Now granted, an injury from what happened could easily be worse than what happened to my husband, but my point is that even with the LESS severe injury (at least according to what she is claiming at this point) he couldn't walk properly and KNEW he needed medical attention immediately. So, she should have had those issues too. Obviously she didn't and walked away without medical attention, so I would be extremely wary. Either consult with an attorney (free consultations are out there) or retain one after she files some sort of claim against your son. Just tell her nicely that since she waived medical attention at the time of the accident that you are concerned that the injuries she is now asking you to pay for may not be related to the accident. That you need proof or she must take you to small claims court.
What a mess. Sorry. Use it to teach your son the importance of following the road laws in the future, and how to ALWAYS report ANY accident on the roadway to the proper authorities. It may cost him the price of a traffic ticket, but it may save him a lot more in financial responsibility by serving as protection against FRAUD. Good luck.

ETA: I'm not saying your son shouldn't be responsible to pay for her out of pocket expenses for injuries she sustained; just to be SURE that they ARE in fact, injuries from the accident. And to put a legal basis onto what your obligations are. Otherwise, this could be the ongoing money hole that never stops....

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L.M.

answers from New York on

I would also be shocked to hear from her. I would think that this would be settled by the insurance companies. I obtain a copy of the police report and contact your insurance company.

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L.A.

answers from Minneapolis on

No, dont pay her. I do think your son is at fault. But she should be submitting everything to her insurance company. They in turn will go after your insurance company. That is what insurance is for.
Was a police report filed? Is there a dr report? It is weird that she is just asking you to hand over cash. I understand some people would rather pay cash, so they dont have to go after insurance and raise their rates, but i would not give her any money. She is just going to keep asking for more.

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J.D.

answers from Phoenix on

I am always a fan of "do the right thing" but I have learned in my experiences to also protect my own a**. People can and will take advantage of you even if you are at fault. I would say something along the lines of "take me to court." If it is NOT done in court, the number of things she could say are results of the accident could be neverending. You need some closure and fairness. The 911 team was declined. I'm sure there is record of that.

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D.K.

answers from Pittsburgh on

I think you are ethically responsible for her medical bills.Your son ran a stop sign - the jogger was in a crosswalk and had the right of way. I do not know if you are legally responsible. I would contact an attorney. I would also determine whether any or your insurance (homeowners, medical, automobile or umbrella policy) covers your actions while on a bicycle. And please let us all know - I have never even considered this possibility. You are lucky your son was not seriously injured. And that he did not get a ticket. Of course, the woman should have inquired after your son. But then again, you did not pick up the phone to find out how she was either.

2 moms found this helpful

N.B.

answers from Minneapolis on

Sounds like alot of fault everywhere to me. Was she jogging with headphones on?. While I love love love mine, I am super overcautious when I ride my bike with them on in the real outside (usually I am on a rowing machine at the gym..rowing to nowhere-land with my eyes closed!)...but maybe she didn't even hear anything due in part to her own issues and fault? I am just asking!

And like another said...its 3 weeks later. She could have stumbled on some stairs in her favorite tetter-tooter high heels for all you know, or for all she told a Dr a week later. Hindsight (on her decision to turn down immediate care and get it on record somewhere) can be a b!tch??

I would consult a lawyer. What, if any, insurance would cover your kid, on a bike, plowing someone down? I mean, people don't have bicycle or jogging insurance! Accident...yup. Unfortunate for all injured parties, yup. Costly, probably, yup.

Personally I just don't buy into a total free pass for pedestrians vs a bike just because they were in a crosswalk, or elsewhere. Both will be injured, likely the biker more from all that road rash...eesh. If a car hit me, you bet...and people have insurance for that to boot!

Contact an attorney. Good luck!

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A.S.

answers from Iowa City on

It would depend how much my medical bills were. Thousands of dollars... yes, I would ask you to pay. One co-pay, no I wouldn't ask you to pay that. Since pedestrians have the right of way and since the lady was in the crosswalk and my child struck the pedestrian because he did not obey a stop sign, then yes, I would pay her bills but I would make sure I knew what I was paying and that everything was related to the accident and not from prior events and I would make sure the bills were not inflated. And then my 15 year old child would either be required to pay me back some if not all of the money and would be banned from riding his bike until I knew he could ride it responsibly. I would make sure he knows that traffic laws apply to cyclists if they are riding on public streets and make sure that he knows said traffic laws.

Finally, yes, she should have asked how your son was but you need to remember that in all likelihood in her eyes SHE is the injured party and worrying about paying her bills and YOUR kid hit her and caused her financial and physical stress so he isn't really going to be her top priority.

I forgot to add...yeah, wait for her to contact an attorney. If she truly wants her bills paid she will contact one. If she never contacts an attorney or files suit then maybe your son gets a freebie. The only reason I say I would pay is because I know your son (and thereby you) will be held legally responsible for her bills.

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T.H.

answers from Kansas City on

I probably wouldn't have asked you for medical bills, but maybe. I would not pay her bills, I would hire an attorney. I agree that this is sort of over your head now and it'll probably cost less to hire a lawyer than to continue paying out ouf pocket endlessly. Plus, the fact that she declined medical care could help you. Or, don't hire an attorney and it may just go to small claims court, not sure. I guess you'll just have to wait and see.

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S.T.

answers from Kansas City on

she is a scammer, don't give her a thing!

1 mom found this helpful

M.J.

answers from Dover on

I wouldn't pay her a dime. Tell her to file in small claims court. If and when you receive anything in the mail, then get a lawyer. She may decide it's not worth it, maybe it was a scam all along, she may go through with it. Don't shell out any money either to her OR a lawyer until you have to.

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J.C.

answers from Anchorage on

I would offer her a reasonable amount, and leave it at that. If she ran out in front of a car your son it not all to blame anyways.

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