What Should I Do? - San Antonio,TX

The sales lady THOUGHT she heard a 13 year old girl tell her 7 year old brother "Let me see your d***". I would be appalled if I heard something like that too. Now, whether it was really said is another story, but unless you come up with something that sounds plausible in place of that, I would have to side with the employee. D*** sounds nothing like we-we and, while therapy may be a bit premature (although maybe it IS needed if indeed your daughter said it, I can see how that would be disturbing), a sound talking to of how trashy the word d*** is coming out of a thirteen year old girl's mouth might be in order.
I just don't see an employee and manager tracking you down if they really and truely didn't believe what they heard.

Bottom line=three things:

1) Your lucky that the manager didn't call social services since that is what her employee thought your daughter said.

2) You'll never really know the truth but you can learn from the situation to make sure it never happens again.

3) Don't send your 13 and 7 mixed gender kids to the bathroom together anymore (were they in the same stall together or was she standing outside the stall door?).

I stand outside the door (cracked open with my foot) and yell "is everything okay?" every 10 seconds while my 7 year old is in the men's room. I've gotten weird looks..BUT.....who cares?

What the heck did your daughter say that was so inappropriate that a staff member felt the need to say something to you? I'm not asking you to share it on here, I'm just saying...how bad could it have been? What could the employee have exactly heard that made them feel the need to say something to you?

I think the manager was out of line saying what she said, but really, at this point, I would just let it go. You've done what you can do, you stood up for your daughter, now it's time to move on. You can beat yourself against a brick wall trying to prove you are right but it won't accomplish anything. The only thing I would consider would be writing a letter of complaint to the manager's supervisor and also think about never shopping there again.

This is confusing without knowing what was said. Was it a swear word that they got so upset by? At this point do you even know if it was in fact your daughter? I think I would let it go and go to a different store if you are that offended by it.

Well first of all dont stress on this. The employee may have heard something and took it out of context, or she may have heard someone else and mistook your children for saying it, or your kids did say it and might possibly be lying (they do do that on occasion no matter what we might think).
I think I would just write it off as a bad trip to the grocery store and just leave it at that. The employee in question might be a kook, ya never know, they live and walk amongst us everyday and have jobs.
How old are your kids? If sis was takin lil' brother to go pee they must not be too old... what was the alleged statement that caused the incident in the first place, can you share it with us?
ADD ON:
Even if your daughter did say let me see your d***, that definitely didnt warrant all that bs it caused. Dick is a pretty common term for the body part.
I think the store employee might have just been pissed off that a 7 yr old boy was in the ladies room, that is a bit old... and that's what caused her to complain. I dont feel comfortable with boys older than about 4 in the ladies room, just an fyi.

Wow! They were totally out of line to speak to you in the first place. and then to make that comment?! I would NEVER shop there again - and I'd let them know it too! Take your kids and your business elsewhere.

Now I am curious as to what your kids said. Without knowing that's all I can say. I do think it is best to start shopping somewhere else.

I think you should make a statement with your cash--just shop somewhere else.
It sounds like a big misunderstanding.

Can you go above the manager? If the store is a chain, ask to speak to the regional manager or owner. I definitely wouldn't let this slide. This is deplorable behavior for store employees. Keep going back with your complaint!

I think you've done everything right and I would NEVER shop their again. The sales lady was probably in the stall and misheard everything but then saw your kids while washing her hands. How awful for you and especially your daughter. After reading your "so what happened" and heard their ages, I know my daughter would feel the same way and want to confront the person telling lies about her. The only thing else I might do is contact their corporate office.

I think you have to believe your kids on this one. Frankly, the store was WAY out of line to degrade a customer by suggesting therapy. We've all been misunderstood on occasion. (I was called into my supervisor's office because a delivery guy thought I used the "F" word to him at the nurse's desk!! I said something about his "funky old germs" when he said he had a cold, but that wasn't what he heard! Fortunately, my supervisor believed me. I laugh about it now, but I was mortified at the time.) Give your kids the benefit of the doubt, and shop somewhere else. That place has no concept of "Customer Service".

I would honestly go about the manager and make a complaint to the store. Only because it would make me feel better. It is not up to ANYONE to tell us how to raise our kids. I raise my kids a bit differently from everyone else I know. So who are they to say what was said (if anything was said) was inappropriate? It sounds like you are being like any mom and just protecting your kids, while trying to teach them right. Like I said, I would go above the managers head for the comment that was made, but then move on from there. Is there another store where you can shop at? I'm sorry someone made such an ignorant remark to you.

Your feeling are hurt and it is a very unfortunate situation, but you should probably just let it go. You already supported your children. Showed them you believe them and will stand up for them, but other people are just that. - other people. This manager has no bearing on the health or upbringing of your children. Just turn the other cheek and continue shopping there, or turn the other cheek and stop shopping there.
Escalating this is not going to make you feel better or resolve anything.

Don't know what your kids said,the manager was out of line,the kids weren't talking to the other woman they were talking amongest themselves,& why weren't you present in the bathroom when they were using it...

How old are your kids? What could young kids say that would be inappropriate? I am completely at a loss. Is this your prefered grocery store or is there another that is equally as good? If you want to shop at this store in the future I suggest you write a letter to the district manager with a cc to the manager. Unless your child said something threatening to her brother or scary about his or her genitals, I can't imagine that it would rise to the level of this kind of attention. Did they tell you what is was that your child is alleged to have said? I recall my 3 year old neice using medical terminology, very loudly, asking my sister when the baby would be coming out of her "v- - - - -" ? while they were standing on line in the very-quiet bank. Since my sister is a nurse she always believed in using medical terminology. After hearing that story I always refered to it as the "opening God makes for babies to come out of the womb".
Perhaps the store manager and the coworker are very old fashioned and feel that medical use of body parts is inappropriate? Is your child old enough to have learned "things" in school health-ed? In our very liberal school district my kids were introduced to same-gender parenting in 1st grade and kids talk on the playground - they are almost forced in to learning about things they should never know about until they're adults. My son asked about same gender sex pretty early becuase other students had older siblings and they had heard some pretty accurate - but to their minds wierd information. So you never know. Your daughter may have very innocently told her brother about her body parts and how they are different from his - maybe she even showed him while they were in the stall. Assuming she's 8 or younger I do not think there's an issue. If she's older she needs to understand that there are in-family topics that are not to be talked about outside the house / car. (We include in that discussion-category things like sex, passing gas, toilet humor, etc.) Also consider that this sales lady might have past traumas of her own that she's projecting on any children. You know your kids better than anyone. Avoid the store if you can easily do so - and if you can't then write to the district manager. Please re-post with what happens if you get an answer.

RE-POST
I am sure that your daughter did not ask to see your son's winky. (although I could see my kids goofing off about it but not in any serious conversation) As you said she may very well have told him to watch out and make sure not to tinkle on the seat in words htat could be construed differently. Even this morning I misunderstood something my kid said to me and she was in the the front seat of the car right next to me It is very easy to mis-understand what is said in other people's conversations. Personally at 7 I think your son is old enough to go in the men's room alone. I would stand out side and yell in - just as another person said. I've asked many a "normal looking" man exisitn ghe mens room if they noticed my son in there and have been told, many times, yeah, he's fine, he's just washing his hands, etc. I am not thrilled about seeing a 7 year old in the ladies room.

WOW, they shouldn't have said anything to you in the first place! It may take a village, but this sort of thing really gets on my nerves. Your kids must be really young if they were both genders and in the restroom together. It's hard to make a judgment call on just how stupid the store clerk is because we don't know what was said, but she should really keep her opinion to herself. It would be different if she witnessed your daughter or soon physically abusing the other one and felt you needed to know. The manager's tone and what she said to you is infuriating! I would NEVER go in there again. If you feel you must, just go when the sales person is there to clear it up. Personally I would be in touch with regional or national management with a GIGANTIC complaint. The whole thing was way out of line, but the manager's remarks to you are over the top. The company needs to know how that manager speaks to customers.

how could your son and daughter be in the same bathroom at the same time (unless your son is super young)? I'm a bit confused.

Either way, I'd go back to the store and confront the sales person who said she heard your daughter say something and see if she even agrees that it is your daughter.

Do not let this drop, she actually told you to get your kids therapy!?! Did you get her name? At most stores there are signs by customer service that list the store manager or owner with a phone number. Call and complain.